MY GOD WHAT HAVE I FOUND XD

10 or 11 little ducks have been spotted crossing the dash board

I always was partial to:

“My life story is just like yours; starting with calamity and shouting, and ending with an empty room and a to-do list.”

Night Vale had some of the BEST one off quotes that would just suckerpunch you in the chest leave you breathless

Like the one that stuck with me was this one:

"when a person dies and no one will miss them, the mourning is assigned to a random human. This is why sometimes you just feel sad."

It's been almost 11 years... It haunts me in a good way

DONT CLICK ON THAT!!! whew. sorry. just be careful.. many people dont know that .pdf stands for “poison dart frog.”

dirty girl soup

Stay safe guys!

To those in Texas dealing with this shit show of a polar vortex, your friendly neighbourhood Canadian is here.

SO you've lost power and fucking freezing? First things first. You're going to grab literally every blanket and pillow and cushion you can find.

Grab some newspaper or other papery material, it's insulation.

Next, you're going to build yourself a motherfucking blanket fort. Keep it small but with enough space you won't feel like death.

Put the newspaper on the floor, put cushions and pillows, then your blankets. Build it up.

Any form of light source will also help (just please don't light anything on fire). Keep that there.

As for clothing, you need to layer it up. Keep moisture wicking material as a base, then build it up. You might look like the Michelan tire man or Pillsbury Dough Boy but you'll be warm.

If you have pets that are susceptible to the cold, put one of your shirts on them and bring them to the blanket fort.

KEEP YOUR TAPS DRIPPING SO THEY DON'T FREEZE.

DO NOT OPEN YOUR FRIDGE OR FREEZER UNLESS YOU HAVE TO. The temperature there will not protect your food enough.

If you have to go out at all, look for shiny patches on the road. That is black ice.

If you hit ice, don't panic, don't hit the pedals, lightly take your foot off the gas, steer into the skid to gain control again (do not over steer) and then straighten your wheel. Look where you want to go and then start slightly steering that way.

Pack clothes and blankets. Cardboard, shovel, and cat litter if you have it. This will help if you happen to get stuck.

IF YOU GET STUCK IN THE SNOW for the love of God do not just gun it. That will damage your vehicle and dig you into a bigger hole. You need to either wait for help or "rock" your vehicle. Hit the gas a little, then back off of it. Do this in a steady rhythm so that your car rocks. Rock with it.

Y'all can get through it. Stay safe my friends.

we've done it again folks

when she says she doesn’t send nudes

I love this so much

ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ɢᴏᴏᴅʙʏᴇ

how freakin’ cute is it that ted talks to paul about the “latte hotte” meaning the pretty 23-year-old mean girl, meanwhile paul saw the 5ft angry woman in her 30s and thought “yeah, i know exactly who you mean”

This is gorgeous!!!

[BIG SHOT!]