100 Reasons NOT To Kill Yourself

so im trying to decipher this chart on wikipedia that has common vampire weaknesses in it and

a ‘green/yes’ is a weakness, a ‘red/no’ is something that isnt a weakness, and a ‘?’ is something that has never been addressed but fucking riddle me this

in what lore are vampires weak to getting soggy in milk

Girl are you the Hays Code the way you consider media irredeemable if it depicts anything that strays away from the norm you're comfortable with or depicts anything morally questionable without definitively condemning it and anyone associated with it, therefore creating worse stories and content and making it difficult for people to engage with complicated issues from a nuanced and controlled perspective?

does anyone rember there was some kind of elevator scene in the great big vampire castle in twilight.? like, why.

Star Theory: Elden Ring outer gods and the 'nature of the universe'

(I'm feeling particularly neurotic so you're suffering with me)

SO, in case you aren't aware, which is entirely possible i barely knew of it before, but stars have life cycles! Which is weird, right? And the fact that it's never brought up in Elden Ring despite the fact there's this sense that Markia and everyone is supposed to be old as hell? And there's an entire academy dedicated to learning of the stars?

Well, dear reader, do I have the explanation for you! This will be long winded, so bear with me! And if there's someone who's already done this, you should probably listen to them instead!

first and foremost, stars are made up of conflicting forces, gravity pushing in, heat pushing out. But, to keep things more poetic, and in line with the whole fantasy aspect of elden ring, let's call it the Devouring aspect and the Creation aspect. Gravity creates pressure, trying to devour itself, but creates it's own feed to feast upon. Easy to follow?

As such, everything exists in perpetuity, creating itself and living in cycles? Or more importantly, every action has its equal opposite reaction. Life begets death, so on so forth. So everything lives in duality, having one part of itself necessary to oppose to creat more of it.

now, that's just how a star works, but there's more than one type of star, and thus life cycles.

this is a more rudimentary visual, but it gets the point across, alright?

Quick to start, let's cover backstory (or at least what I assume the backstory is) of the One Great, Greater Will, and what not for a quick understanding. But keep the visual in mind!

First, we can safely (?) assume that the One Great from Hyetta's dialog is likely in reference to the big bang in some capacity, so that's the beginning of the universe covered. One Greats dead, created everything, blah blah blah.

Next! As said in something about the glinstone sorcerer Azur(?) he witnessed the Greater Will's death, where it likely then became a Black Hole (the mass death of stars around it?) [Comet Azur and the Primeval Current is likely in reference to the nature of the expanding universe, akin to how water spreads out from a droplet of water, just on a mass scale i guess, given it almosg looks like rushing water to me]

Wverything after that and during when the Greater Will was up and running? no idea, not really important for my argument anyways.

So where does that leave Metyr and Elden Beast? Well, Metyr has the Neutron star attack, and given that she's the prodigal daughter of a dead god, it seems like she witnessed at least some of the death maybe? Or is at least aware of the 'end' of gods in something capacity, maybe. Elden Beast however seem more like stabilized core of a star given its veins of gold, and given that the Greater Will was a God of Order, it makes sense that at least one of them seems somewhat stable. (Sorry Metyr)

On to the outer gods and the necessity of duality!

As you can see, there are multiple forms of stars! Red and Yellow as main focal, with maybe othefs?

So! Let's start with the obvious,

The Blood Star- red? Check. Small or large? Eh. Formless Mother? What?

As I said about duality, and stars, one begets the other. The Devouring agent and the Creation agent.

Specifically, let's take a quick detour through religious inspiration. And I'm gonna make this quick.

*There is this belief that a whole being is made up two people, one masculine one feminine. Greeks had it in the creation mythos of man, and there's probably a Buddah or two that have the same shtick, unfortunately I'm not overly familiar with that game, but you get my point.

And in some eastern beliefs, i believe Taoism, there is a dichotomy between the masculine and feminine. One physical and other spiritual, repectively*

Point is, if stars can represent outer gods, and a whole being is made up of two. Than it's likey that Devouring agent and Creation agent have their respective gods conjoined into one star but still separate identities! (So Marika and Radagon?)

-The easiest outer gods to apply this logic to are the ones I mentioned up top, The Blood Star and Formless Mother. Both deal in blood, one masculine and demanding sacrifice of blood in the physical, with the whole history of blind prisoners. while the Formless Mother 'asks' for blood with 'promises' of something in return, a bargain like upping Mohgs wings to a latger size, and has a more creation aspect given the Mother moniker. As well as 'gifting' her blood to people, such as Mohg, and a piece of her flesh in the DLC blood fiends cult cave place that they apparently ate. Perharps, some kind of desire to be devoured in the sense of missing a whole part of the self where life is born from death? Through the pressure of the star then creating heat?

-Next would be: The Rot! I think that with the whole Lake of Rot being a more red-red color, it was defeated by the blind swordsman(? right?) when it was in its masculine phase, and then switched over into the more feminine side, trying to spread it's influence through any means necessary as a dying star! Thus taking on a more pinker color through Romina's bud, being 'born anew' by it in some capacity and also seemingly taking nest in feminine figures, Romina and Melania! (Also through Milicent being 'born' of Melania through odd means?)

-The Twin Birds would likely be a blue star in some capacity, likely quite large given that they represent death and all that. However, that's as far as I can get really. And death has its whole thing going on with Godwyn as well and I just don't wanna touch it.

-The Fell God and The God Devoring Serphant (Not the Abyssal Serphant) are kind of intertwined due to proximity, and the giants forge having serphants on it. As well as Rykard and Eiglay being in a volcano, as opposed to the giants forge being on a mountain top surrounded by snow. Life, Death. Fire, Ice. Duality, ya know?

-The Abyssal Serphant likely exists in duality to the One Great rather than something more simple, which is why it snake imagery slips into everything despite everything being born of the One Great. Abyssal Serphant devours, the One Great, creates. Not specifically a star, but it's good to get it out of the way now real quick. But will show up later! And it's similar to Dark Souls!

-The Frenzied Flame, the big doozey. You know how I said everything exists in duality? Well, what better way for duality to exist then for duality to be dual in itself? If you want 2, you can't just have the single number, you need two! So why not 2 and 3? Confused yet? Duality needs duality to be duality. As such, Order is Chaos. That easy.

-The Greater Will and The Frenzied Flame, are two sides of the same coin. Creating order, the other wanting to burn it all down. A microcosm of the One Great and The Abyssal Serphant pretty much. The first wanting to continually exist in perpetuity creating, the other a harbinger of the end itself. Heat death of the universe pretty much, i guess.

-The moons?

I don't wanna talk about the moons. In our guiding stars very own lordly words, Count Ymir, they are simply the closest celestial bodies. (I'm lying)

Okay so what's up with tem? Are they gods? No? Then what are they? If they are gods, then why isn't there a god of the Lands Between? It's a terrestrial body isn't it? If the moon is like greek myth, the titan Selene, where is Gaia?

Well, that's where Marika (and Radagon) come in. So, as we learned in the DLC, a god requires a lord, and when we finish the main game, unless we choose Ranni's ending, we become Marika's consort. So, perhaps it's something similar to such? The necessity of duality?

-My leading theory, with everything else already explained, is that maybe the Greater Will was an outer god, killed Placidsaxes god? In some way? And then needed some kind of 'vessel' to keep the lands intact and in order. Thus, Marika. The chosen Empyrian. (The Gloam Eyed Queen is likely another Abyssal Serphant coming up through the cracks of creation, in opposition to the One Great/Greater Will 'lineage'? It's another microcosm)

-But then Radagon? How? well, if a god requires two forces acting against each other, makes sense that he's the masculine force to Marikas feminine and spiritual, whole shaman thing, side. Thus creating a whole god, but yet only one i regarded as a god, with Radagon yet to become her; in that famous line Melina tells us.

-But then Ranni? And Miquella? Well, Miquella got his consort, and divested himself of his femininity; when it likely made him a true god in the first place or at least the empyrian in the lead to godship, but we kill him so who knows.

And Ranni is backed by the moon. And I don't wanna talk about the stupid moons and her four arms. She divested herself of her flesh anyways, so who knows!

-The shadow bound beasts aren't even really fleshed out, Miquella doesn't seem to have one, so I'm not sure where they stand in all this. Maybe they really are just failsafes and Miquella didn't need one because he wasn't going in a drastic direction according to the Greater Will (technically Metyr but whatevs)

yeah and I think that's it. thanks for reading!

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wasnt sure which blog exactly to send this one to.... but take this. this goes down as the best fic i'll probably ever read (and will reread. a lot.) i think I ascended so many times and im only half way through. but. like? a hella long platonic soulmates character study w my literal favourite character (my beloved necromancer) and your INCREDIBLE interpretation of izuna ???? you both amaze me. so much. just. wow. anyways this was an emotional need to do. so hope u like it :))

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