!!VERY MILD TWST PLAYFUL LAND SPOILERS:!!

OK SO I HAVE TO BRING THIS UP

Did you know that Ursula’s design, attitude, personality etc were actually inspired by a Drag Queen named Divine? Look it up if you don’t believe me.

All I’m saying is: Live Drag Shows at the Monstro Lounge are definitely in the cards for a Drag Queen MC.

(probably after Book 3 but who knows)

What if the reader were a drag queen in Twisted Wonderland?

A/N : Oh wow...This is the first time I've ever written with a drag queen I might make some mistakes in writing this but I will try my best to make it come out as good as possible.

English is not my first language. If I wrote it wrong, please tell me more

Warning : Maybe yandere? I don't know,It's quite short..

Twisted Wonderland x drag queen!Readers

in my opinion When you first appeared Your veil will reveal your face clearly. There is a chance that you will have the hottest makeup and hairstyle.

which they will definitely think of as a woman Until the moment you spoke (I imagine vil was keeping a special eye on you)

Which I think is about 99.99%, you will definitely wear makeup to study. Because I think for the most part it wouldn't be unusual for students to wear makeup to class.(I hope)

And during the fifth chapter I bet you and Will are super close. Just imagine. You are exchanging each other's fashion.

If I think about it, in the beginning you might not have many people accepting you. But as you stay longer, everyone starts to accept you And there are still some that won't accept you.

Oh my god, I'm such a terrible writer. If anyone would be kind enough to explain it to me further. Please don't be angry if I write poorly. 'Cause I feel the same

I agree, one, because his appearance is not like he’s a little kid, and Its noted by himself and other characters that yes, he has a youthful appearance, but not so much so that people think it all to unbelievable for him to be a Third Year, and the non-fae 3rd years are around 18-19 if I’m not wrong?

Two, like you pointed out, its more of a gag then anything else.

I think they created that gag on the fact if they were talking a Bat in inspiration with his character design, then a shorter than average height, smaller head, and bigger, wider eyes was inevitable, which are both commonly used design traits for more youthful characters, and since he’s literally the oldest in the original playable cast, so they probably thought it would be a fun joke.

I’ve also noticed it’s used as a plot piece to have the other characters not believe his age even if told. I can’t remember if it was Trey or Lilias Vignette but their working together on a history project, and Lilia basically does the equivalent of drop several years worth of forgotten history about it, and directly references that he is really fucking old, and Trey basically just goes “Haha sure you are Lilia. Where did you learn all that?”

It’s actually pretty clever on his part, because by doing this, the other characters don’t question if he’s actually the age he’s supposed to be, even when he’s he’s so oddly mature and knowledgeable about things way before that time. They’re just like “Hahaha yea Lilia just likes acting old as a joke, he’s a huge history buff. Theres literally no way he’s 500+”

As someone who is recently 18 with extreme babyface and a short height, I too am not above using it for mild gain in certain situations and let me tell you, I’ve gotten away with CRAZZZY shit, so I can verify the effectiveness of this method.

Not too recently because I am a hobbit most of the time, but there have been alot of times I snuck into places by saying my parents were in there, gotten to eat off the kids menu ( ONLY BECAUSE WHY THE F**K CAN ONLY LITTLE KIDS ORDER CHICKEN TENDERS THATS STUPID??) or waiting for a family to pass and rush up so they hold the door so I can get into hotel members club rooms and shit.

I successfully infiltrated the rich (a yacht club) with this method while my actual dad was literally a block away talking with some relatives.

(I got bored and Free Food is Free Food ok.)

Anyway, shOtocon is entirely different in this regard. Their designs are deliberately made childlike and s*xualized, and use the “oh their 5000+” as a built in excuse more than a gag or plot device. Theres also often no world build or plot based reason for it either, and the purpose the character serves in the story can usually very easily be replaced by a full grown adult.

It’s just there because the creators are unfortunately either creeps, or hoping to monetize off creeps.

Sorry I yap alot but IN CONCLUSION I AGREE WITH YOU. I’m not really a romanticizer so i’m more going entirely off logic here! Correct me on anything if needed :D

Is it weird that I don't see people liking Lilia romantically as strange people? I mean yeah, he looks like a kid but I feel like throughout the whole story, he's a full grown adult and I mean LITERALLY.

He has taken care of two kids and been to war. He still mentors his kids too.

I feel like him looking like a kid is more of a funny gag rather than how the usual anime media does with their 5000 year old kid looking demon girls. He's like one of the characters that make it at least funny and not sexualized.

I'm not defending sh0tac0n or anything like that. I just feel like the trope of having a child looking 30000 year old grandpa would work so much if it was just for comedy and not for people's disgusting desires for children.

Edit: Additional ones I just thought of for staff:

Crowley: Once had to bike around a shit ton of bird corpses lining several yards of sidewalk to meet my dormmates at a lighthouse, went to the wrong lighthouse anyway, and had to bike back through it.

Bonus: Not One I did, but my Dad once preheated the oven to 350 degrees without realizing there was a pizza box in there, then left the house a few minutes before it caught on fire so my sister had to stop it. (I was upstairs and did nothing, as foretold in the Ace one)

Sam: I have a penchant for finding or somehow receiving the randomest shit:

I have 6 pool sticks yet no pool table,

A Hunting Bullet from 1947 and a Modern Handgun bullet (both found in the woods pretty close to eachother while camping)

Jeff the Third Croc (A bright orange mens size 11 croc I acquired in the woods while ironically wearing bright orange crocs)

3 Mardi gras Masks (I’m from Northeastern America and have never attended Mardi gras)

A 1923 Copy of the complete works of Shakesphere.

A weird necklace someone gave me that looks like some amulet thing in a movie.

An old fashioned wall phone with no wall or numbers.

A Tsuyu Asui figurine that glows in the dark for some reason, it wasn’t advertised to do so. (Nuclear Weapon?)

Several pieces of shattered Ancient Clay pots I found and tried to put back together.

A piece of coral with a whole ass plant growing from it.

5 pounds of mostly artwork and a rock from a friend (art of their ocs.)

A gigantic Blue and gold sombrero (and the sombrero case it came with)

Coyote skull from my Texan Friend (She apparently killed it herself which makes me more confused and concerned on why she gave me its skull)

A broken fishing rod me and two friends chain linked together to pull out of a lake.

And some other weird shit.

Crewel : I used to love giant fluffy coats and still do. Will wear them in the summer.

Vargas : I walked to school in a t-shirt, shorts and flip-flops during a blizzard to prove something (I don’t remember what)

Bonus: On my first day at my new school last year , I climbed to the roof and jokingly yelled down to my friend “I HAVE THE HIGH GROUND!”, then threw an eraser at him.

Also apparently I’m the first student to ever get to the roof and not get caught, yet here I am self incriminating myself. Oh well.

Trein: Wrote over 100,000 words in an essay out of spite.

———

I still have more dumb shit I’ve experienced but I have once more run out of characters.

Stupid Shit I’ve done/Gotten myself into by accident/been dragged into as Twisted Wonderland Characters:

—————-

Ace : Heard my sister screaming bloody murder downstairs and didn’t do shit because I assumed she was watching a horror movie. Turns out there was a fire in the oven.

Bonus: Sniped my friend in the eye from across the Cafeteria with a Ketchup Packet, Meant to hit his glasses, but he repositioned them at the last second.

Deuce: Answered Maine four times on a Historical Geography test and was wrong all four times.

Cater: Threw my phone out of the window in a panic after seeing one of my Idols followed me back.

Bonus : Accidentally convinced a transfer camper from Wales I was from London after I quoted something in the accent to myself in the showers and was too awkward to tell them I wasn’t when they struck up the conversation.

(I am from America, and the camp is in America.)

Trey: Accidentally created a puddle of Dark Red Icing and Stepped in it four times in a row while making a cake at 2 am.

Bonus : Befriended and helped out the owner of a French Bakery down the street when they started out, they ended up becoming really popular (rightfully so, her stuff is amazing) and now I either get free shit and/or Friends and Family Discounts.

Riddle : I have read the dictionary on multiple occasions out of sheer boredom.

Bonus: I once read the bible and marked down verses. Im not religious I just needed to win an argument.

Leona: Slept through an earthquake and 3 ambulances coming to my house bcs my sister was hurt.

Ruggie: Waited for families going inside to pass by and asked them to hold the door for me so I could sneak into a VIP rooms for free food. (Usually only at fancy hotels but luckily this strategy is flexible when your 5’2 with a baby face.)

Jack: Used to Smash open large rocks containing Crystals or Quartz at the beach as a kid, and now I have a large collection of them.

Bonus: I have extremely good hearing, to the point I hear into the negative decibels up to -15 - -20 (according to the audiologist this is rare but i literally don’t know shit about audio and decibels) so my old dormmates used to try and bribe me to tell them what I heard about certain things or themselves.

Bonus 2: Almost got shot by an illegal hunter while in the woods with my sister.

Floyd : Cracked my skull open at the pool, lost consciousness for a few seconds and woke up in the water calling for help, then got confused on why I was calling for help.

Bonus : A Sea lion once came up to me while I was scuba diving and did little circles, bumped its snout on my mask and just followed me the whole time in a very gleeful manner as a temporary homie.

Bonus 2: Apparently ate / took bites of my moms library books as a little kid (????) according to the librarian.

Jade: Taught myself to untie my hands with my hands behind my back, tie by hands behind my back with my hands behind my back, deciphered, translated and memorized a fictional hieroglyphic language, Read from Act 1 to Act 6 of Homestuck, and accidentally discovered how to disguise Chocolate Ice Cream as Pistachio; all within the span of 2 weeks. (I had covid and was A-Symptomatic)

Bonus : Lived in the Woods for 7 months (in total), had a large bag of mica and Almost Drowned in a tent when there was no moving water nor rain. (Basically, I was asleep, Woke up underwater, nearly went back to bed, then shot out of my tent screaming “My Tent Titanticed!” )

(It was like 3 am don’t judge me)

Azul: Somehow ended up with $2200 dollars in $100s in Monopoly at the end of the game. Also have been stuck between two identical twins while talking with both and boi that shits TRIPPY. (I also almost died with them later but it was fine)

Bonus: I lived on a middle of fuck knows where island during the spring and summer up until covid, yet I absolutely despise eating fish or Shellfish, and the smell often makes me nauseous.

(Bonus 2: I love shiny things, but very specifically fancy looking keys. I also had a weird obsession with signing a shiny contract after watching Ariel. Another tiny thing Is I own a Flotsam and Jetsam Scarf which I chuck around when Floyd or Jade pisses me off ingame.)

Kalim : Got distracted by a cool leaf while at a fancy resort in Xatapa, Mexico, and waddled off from my parents and explored around to try and find more, somehow managed to get extremely far and ended up lost in a whole different city for 6 hours while trying to find my way back.

Bonus 1: I had an obsession with Kiwis for awhile as a kid, and our neighbors house had a Pangium tree that reached over to our yard. (It was planted before either families moved in so we didn’t know) I thought it was some kind of strange Kiwi and ate one. I didn’t like it and was like “Oh maybe its not ripe” and waited 3-5 months then tried it again, same reaction, repeat process one more time.

I went to my parents out of curiosity and asked them what it was, and so after some process I am unaware of but I think my mom brought one of the fruits somewhere, we discovered what it was.

Pangium contains Fatal amounts of Cyanide if not properly prepared. I was fine but for the love of anything please don’t try eating it like little me did.

Bonus 2: I’ve Almost died more times than I can count on both hands and feet. Im not an heir or something fancy I just have wackass luck.

Jamil: Once had to talk my sister out of jumping off a tour boat because our cousin dared her to.

Bonus : Managed to make French Toast in the middle of the woods with Dehydrated Milk, Cinnamon, Three Eggs I stole, and a loaf of bread we got once a month. Also made 3 kinds marinated chicken in the middle of the woods.

(My Cooking Style is literally “just trust me bro.” I’m like Lilia except it actually works and is edible)

Epel : Whenever we went applepicking at my Grandfathers house, I’d climb into the trees and throw or pass the apples down. Sometimes I actually wish I could sit in trees more often shits comfy.

Bonus: My Mom was a Champion Horseback Rider as a kid, and sometimes took us to this Dude Ranch I shall not name for my own privacy, but I’d run around with this group of kids and this one herding dog like a damn movie protagonist, sometimes go riding horses, or the one time we stole a tractor and near crashed it (THE REGRETS I STILL HAVE-) etc.

The WHIPLASH from that to going back to a whitewashed Northeast suburban town is insane.

Rook: My Cousins and I, and sometimes the kids at the priorly mentioned ranch, would play the most intense games of manhunt (basically really intense hide n seek at night) ,

I mean wearing camo if you had it, alliances, little dollar store walkie-talkies, code words, binoculars, climbing in trees or hiding in bushes/tall grasses/Hay to “scout”.

I hid in a large pot/vase more than once and another time on a roof, and (ONLY ONCE, DO NOT DO THIS IM STUPID) under a car.

I still remain the top in last man standing points. Mostly bcs I’m stingy with rescues but shhh

Vil - Accidentally poured a lot of liquid eyeliner into my eye, was literally crying out Eyeliner for 30 minutes. Also taught myself to run and jump in heels as a kid because I thought it looked cool in movies.

Ortho : Unknowingly was Hacking my Elementary School Databank for several years,

I genuinely thought it was normal to go on the school website, press a few buttons and be able to find a friends address if I had a playdate and needed to tell my mom where the house was, a parents phone number if needed communication with my friends parents , and mostly ignored the other general info.

I didn’t even know I did this until my dad told me a few months ago that I almost got suspended for it but by the time they found out it was the end of my last year there. ;—;

Idia: Accidentally acquired both a Nahida and Eula in Genshin and was genuinely annoyed at the time, they are now my most powerful DPS’s…

Bonus : I own a shit ton of original Japanese first edition Pokemon Cards my cousin gave me, (they are probably worth more than me which is neat), and I have a giant pile of Pokemon plushies I have infact fallen asleep on or in on multiple occasions.

Bonus 2: I was playing Breath of the Wild, and my very first thing I did after getting off the plateau was beeline for the castle. I actually got all the way up and took out 2 blights but the Wind one kicked my ass.

Bonus 3: Got confessed to and asked out by a guy I did not like nor knew very well, and I panicked, said “Maybe, Sorry no.” And ran into a wall. Also have crawled through a chute to avoid an awkward situation as a kid (do not recommend its dusty and definitely not safe)

Bonus 4: Once didn’t sleep for 5 days.

Malleus : Accidentally attended a Private Party and a Private Funeral in the same week. I was not invited nor knew anyone present. Stayed there for most of it because I was too nervous to say I wasn’t supposed to be there. Whoop.

Bonus: Got nicknamed the “Trip Curse.” By my Old Dormmates because everytime I went on a trip with them everything seemed to go to shit or get hella chaotic.

Bonus 2: Another camping one: Once woke up at night with a shit ton of fireflies just chilling in my tent. It was serene but also I genuinely thought I was hallucinating for a few minutes.

Lilia: Literally will hang upside down anywhere I can, its so fun bro.

Bonus : I know an extremely large amount of useless historical information, and once genuinely realized I know more about poison than what flour and eggs are used for in baking.

Silver : Once befriended a wild horse ( Im like 90% sure he was a Chestnut).

I called him Clover the Dog like horse because he was honestly just a golden retriever in the body of a horse.

This is great and theres alot of sweet moments, but then theres the times you have a giant horse galloping full speed at you for attention or trying to nudge you affectionately and nearly pushing you into a creek in the process.

Sebek: Got groundstruck by lightning once. Also I am often told I have a loud voice.

Che’nya : a good friend of mine and I have an inside joke at school where if we see eachother through a window (my school has alot of indoor windows for some reason?), we’ll text the other “Behind you.” Or “To your left.”

——————-

Theres more things I can think of but I have run out of characters and this is getting too long, so ye!

Been thinking about the Traveler being reminded of Inazumas War during Natlan, and an Open Arms Reprise I saw/Heard that sparked an idea about Teppei and Vichamas deaths, so i’m about to make it everyone else’s problem.

Spoilers, obviously

————-

With every scrape of blood off the sole of her once gleaming white boots, the sound of every solider and innocent lost being counted in the rest area, she was reminded of flashing lightning.

Of Gorou returning from unsuccessful search and rescues. Of Kokomis deep eye bags, Of….him. He who never got to try on his uniform.

A dash of moonlight reflected on Paimons hair, now drained from all the tears she had shed, wrapped in the blondes scarf.

She had really been with her through everything. The one constant Lumine could always count on.

“Captain?”

The once familiar voice had the outlander turning immediately.

“Teppei?”

Smiling in his Watasumi uniform, the apparition waved happily . As if he had never died. The friendship bracelet made from his first broken dummy still tied neatly as he stood by a crackling blaze.

“Thats me! It’s been awhile, huh? You look pretty tired, you can rest here by my fire, if you want.”

As if in a haze, she moved forward, an in a foolish leap of faith, jumped to hug her fallen friend, silent tears staining his uniform as he returned the embrace.

When she pulled back, the reality came in.

“You’re dead.”

“Yup.”

“Then how..?”

Rubbing the back of his neck, the former soldier looked off to the side.

“Night…uh…Kingdom stuff? I won’t be here for long, but I met this guy in the afterlife, and he mentioned you made it here, so I wanted to check on you! He helped me out.”

“He?”

Another figure fizzled into view. One she had seen only days ago. But this form was mutilated, ripped apart. He couldn’t have….not after..

“Vichama….?”

He didn’t meet her eyes.

“Rifthounds are the worst, aren’t they?”

Prodding the small flame with a stick, the fallen sighed.

“Once this flame goes out, we’ll be gone for good. You can have my stuff if it’s not too destroyed when….if…you get back. I doubt anyone else will want it.”

“The Captain of Swordfish || will definitely make it out! You haven’t seen what she can do! She’s amazing!”

“You’re weirdly positive for someone who died a long and agonizing death, y’know.”

Eyes of gold welled, the onyx haired patting the log next to him.

“You can let it all out while we wait, Captain. The dead tell no tales, right?”

———

And so, Lumine did just that. Told him everything. Sumeru, Fontaine, and what had happened so far in Natlan. Desperately, she didn’t wish for this moment to end. If only she had obtained Pyro from the Statue, she would have made Vichamas Fire burn eternally.

As it began to fade, Teppei rose from his seat, holding out his hand toward her.

“It’s time to keep moving on Captain.”

“…How Teppei?”

Wind was his only response as she took it all in. He was right, and she knew it. As she took his hand, Vichama cut in.

“I….I know you’re probably tired of all this war and bloodshed, but you’ve got the chance to have a life to live. Someone once told me to Keep them in their heart to bring them home.”

“He’s right! And give all the kindness you can, well, if you can.”

Carefully handing Paimon into her arms, the Inazumian smiled weakly.

“Remember how even during the war, our friendship still made us both feel happy and warm? Don’t give up on making friends like me again.”

The Verdette now stood, his ripped canopy outfit getting stuck on a twig for a moment before he was able to respond.

“And I know from..you know..that you probably might feel like we like we blame you for not being able to save us, but we don’t. Atleast I don’t.”

He faded away first, tossing her a dog-tag necklace with a key attached, leaving just Lumine and Teppei, who admired the mountain view, even in the pitch darkness.

“Y’know, life really is amazing. Everyone takes it for granted until they lose it, so…”

Slipping off his identification tag from around his neck, the deceased pressed it into her hand.

“Even after all this, try to greet the world with Open arms, ok? It’s going to be hard, but I think you’re capable of anything, I really do.”

Just like Vichamas, his visage began to fade, ruffling her hair as he disappeared.

“Thanks for everything, Traveler. I couldn’t have asked for a better Captain, or a better friend.”

One final time, he smiled.

“Goodbye, my friend.”

The fire flickered to nothingness as he vanished.

——-

Paimon stirred, yawning as she shifted around in the swaddle Lumine had made with scarf as the outlander began to prepare the hot air balloon.

“Paimon had this dream about Teppei and Vichama, and a huge war in….”

As she floated to oversee the region from above, the cheeriness in her voice all but faded.

“Oh…Guess Paimon wasn’t dreaming about the war then…is…is it really not over?”

“Not yet Paimon. Soon. Open arms.”

“Open arms? Whats that supposed to mean?”

————-

____________

Link to the Open Arms Reprise that gave me this idea!:

Yea thats it.

Enjoy.

I’m just thinking, like, with Jade and Azul being the top two..

Imagine both your housewarden and Vice Housewarden constantly say “Oh my..” every other goddamn sentence but not even in surprise but just to be an asshole.

You cannot tell me that the Octavinelle students and (after the events of book 3) Ace, Deuce and Yuu don’t have an inside joke about that somehow.

Azul is the only person in Octavinelle not aware of it, mostly because Jade finds it funny to watch people freak out when he shows up behind them mid-referencing it, so he actively gaslights Azul into thinking its just mass dorm habit.

But seriously if someone said “Oh my” in the tone its implied Jade uses for that every third sentence I would actually tweak.

おや (oya) is an interjection that can mean things like “well!” or “oh my!” in English, to express slight surprise, and some characters in Twst repeat it often as a verbal tic.

Jade repeats it at least 96 times throughout the main story/vignettes/events.

Other characters who will often say "oya" are:

・Azul (83 times)

・Rook (73 times)

・Malleus (19 times)

・Fellow (18 times)

・Riddle (16 times)

・Lilia (15 times)

・Crowley (12 times)

・Idia, Rollo, Marja (4 times)

・Trein and Leona (2 times)

・Jamil and Ortho (once each, though Leona, Jamil and Ortho are speaking in a mocking way when they do so)

・It is also occasionally repeated by ghosts, Sam, and unnamed characters.

Leona and Garfield are one in the same.

I will not be taking objections at this time.

Since y’all liked my adeuce as Jedediah and Octavius heres a second version, since I’m in Greece, it’s Mamma Mia.

I won’t explain anything, its just their dynamic.

IM LITERALLY SO CONFUSED I CANT TELL IF THIS IS REAL OR NOT BRO

Yo, have you guys seen the new TWST x CRK collab?

For the context see the explanation below, spoiler warning for CRK Holiday Express event!

For the context, Cherry-Jam is equivalent of blood for non-cookies creature. E.g. Sugar Gnomes, Choco Werehound Brute. While Strawberry-Jam is the blood for Cookies. And Cherry Pie is Ace favorite food.

So basically Ace Cookie has been eating or drinking? Someone else's blood without realizing.

IT WAS FUCKING MALLEUS ACE WHAT ARE YOU ON???? DID HE CLAIM TO BE THE PREFECTS BESTIE OR SOMETHING??? YOU FEARLESS LOYAL FOOL.

Bro sitting here as if he didn’t try beefing with Ace and then hiding behind a fucking tree when I caught his ass in 4k.

Jamil and Kalim were also in the guest room at the time but Kalim was faced away from those two.

I’m imagining Ace and Mal duking it out while Jamil either watched the Drama or gave up and decided he didn’t get paid enough to deal with this while Kalim was distracted and completely unaware of what was happening behind him.

Does anyone know who’s line the first one is, because I walked into my guest room and:

Whoever Ace was fighting is hiding behind the tree???? And their chibi hasn’t moved so I still can’t tell?????

It lowkey sounds like something Vil, Riddle or Jade would say but Lilia is also a possibility, maybe Malleus????

Ace fears no man, no fish, and no god if its any of them istg.

IM HERE YIPPEEEEEE CHENYA

Twstober Day 26: RSA(chenya)!

(Twstober Masterlist)

his pants sucked the energy out of me