Tech has definitely done something when he is quiet.
You know when Hunter is driving the tank in Juggernaut (S3 E12), and his iconic “HOLD ON!!” before absolutely flooring it?
Wellll I noticed the exact same thing happened when he was piloting the Marauder in Metamorphosis (S2 E11):
So of course I have now adopted the headcanon that whenever Hunter was the one flying / driving he would pull this move before doing something completely unhinged (and potentially unnecessary, but effective nonetheless). And he would justify it by warning his brothers to "hold on" with a split second's notice.
Been a minute since I posted, hasn’t it? Decided I should post this Euphoria themed Tech drawing I did the other day! ✨
I’ll be doing the rest of the batch once I figure out poses for them ✨🤍
I've had some interesting conversations with folks on Twitter over the last few weeks about the timeline of "The Bad Batch" show: How much time passes between any given episodes? How old is Omega during S1 or S3? etc.
(*NOTE: All timeline discussion excludes the TBB epilogue at the end of episode 3.15 "The Cavalary Has Arrived.")
EDIT: I’m also calculating time based on Earth weeks/months/years. I recognize that time in the Star Wars universe likely varies from planet to planet, so I just want to clarify we’re going off IRL time calculations: 7 days to a week, ~30 days to a month, 12 months to a year. I’m also not referring to any external sources (except Wookieepedia, but that’s more to confirm the timeline, not create it), so I don’t care what some guidebook says. I’m going based on what happens in the show itself.
Wookieepedia lists Hemlock's death as 18 BBY, so at least 12-24 months pass between 1.01 "Aftermath" in 19 BBY and Hemlock's death in the series finale.
However, the two biggest and clearest indications of how much time passes during the show is Mayday's comments in 2.12 "The Outpost" and Omega's tally marks in 3.01 "Confined."
In 2.12, Mayday says he's been posted on Barton IV for over a year, and based on his comments, he wasn't posted on Barton IV until after The Clone Wars ended. So, it's been at least a year -- but probably more like 14-15 months because Mayday says "over a year" -- since the events of 1.01 "Aftermath."
Then after the time-jump during 3.01, Omega has about 5.5 months of tally marks. Rounding up from when Crosshair was arrested and taken to Tantiss, about 6 months have passed since 2.12.
So, between those two indicators, at least 18 months have passed between 1.01 "Aftermath" and the end of 3.01 "Confined." But, realistically, it's probably been more like 20-21 months.
Then, the rest of S3 takes place over a pretty compressed timeframe, as no more than a few days seem to pass between episodes. I'll get into this more later, but I'm guessing that the end of 3.01 "Confined" to the big showdown on Tantiss in 3.15 "The Cavalry Has Arrived" takes place over the course of 1-2 months.
Again, it's confirmed that 18-24 months pass between the series premiere and the series finale.
Overall, I'm guessing that Season 1 takes place over the course of 4-6 months. I think this is much shorter than some people think, but it makes sense to me based on context clues.
1.01 "Aftermath" takes place over the course of a few days, and then 1.02 "Cut & Run" to 1.06 "Decommissioned" all seem to take place in a very compressed timeframe. No more than a day or two seems to pass between episodes, and no more than a day or two passes within each episode.
So, I'm thinking the end of 1.06 is takes place about a month after 1.01.
Then we get our first notable time-jump between 1.06 and 1.07.
1.07 "Battle Scars" opens with the Bad Batch having done at least 10 more jobs for Cid since we last saw them in 1.06. (FYI: this is based on Omega and Wrecker's order of 20 cartons of Mantell Mix).
However Cid talks about the Corellia job like it wasn't too long ago, and if we average 2-3 days per job (which seems realistic based on what we see in the show), then about a month has passed between 1.06 and 1.07.
So, at the beginning of 1.07, I'm saying about two months have passed since 1.01 "Aftermath."
Then 1.08 "Reunion" and 1.09 "Bounty Lost" take place immediately after 1.07.
Skipping over 1.10, we get another notable time-jump between 1.09 "Bounty Lost" and 1.11 "Devil's Deal." The biggest indicator is Crosshair's recovery from his injuries on Bracca.
Assuming at least a month for him to recover and be stationed on Ryloth with Rampart & co., that means at least three months have passed between 1.01 "Aftermath" and 1.11 "Devil's Deal."
Even though we don't have any firm timeline, I don't think more than 2 months passed between 1.09 and 1.11, because everyone on Ryloth talks like it hasn't been that long since the Clone Wars ended.
Anyway, then 1.12 "Rescue on Ryloth" takes place immediately after 1.11.
Now, we know that 1.14-1.16 all take place over the course of a few days. So that just leaves us with how much time passes between 1.12 "Rescue on Ryloth" and 1.14 "War-Mantle."
Given that Rampart gave Crosshair permission to hunt down his brothers at the end of 1.12, I'm going to assume he wasn't looking for them that long. Rampart never complains that Crosshair's manhunt is wasting time, or that it's taking so long that they should abandon the effort. Plus, they were also busy decommissioning Tipoca City and the other Kaminoan facilities, so I imagine that took some time.
So, maybe 3-5 weeks (or another month) in all.
To recap, we have:
A month from 1.01 to 1.06
A month between 1.06 and 1.07
A month between 1.07-1.09 and 1.11/1.12
A month between 1.11/1.12 and 1.14-1.16
Overall, 4 months for sure, but 5-6 months seems a good estimate.
This would also account for how much time passes during the Bracca and Ryloth arcs, and gives more wiggle room on how long Crosshair's recovery process was. Maybe it took him two months to recover from Bracca and be assigned to Ryloth. Or maybe Crosshair was searching for his brothers for more than a month after Ryloth. Who knows?
But, overall, I'm estimating the events of 1.16 "Kamino Lost" take place 5-6 months after 1.01 "Aftermath."
I'll tell you now: early Season 2 is where a lot of my guesses go out the window, because we get far fewer clues as to how much time passes between episodes.
Let's start with the time-jump between the end of Season 1 and the beginning of S2.
Based on Rampart and Crosshair's conversation in 2.03 "The Solitary Clone," Crosshair was stranded on Kamino for a month.
Given that he didn't have any food or water on him when his brothers left him on the platform, he must've been emaciated and dehydrated AF, even if he found some way to collect rainwater and/or catch fish. And Rampart said he needed to be "medically cleared" for active duty.
At least two months seems a good estimate. One month for Crosshair to be stranded; another month for him to recover. It's possible it was longer, though, I admit.
So, at the beginning of 2.03 "The Solitary Clone," we're at least 7 months removed from 1.01 "Aftermath."
Now, I actually think 2.03 takes place before 2.01/2.02. Story for another time, but it boils down to:
1) The creators would want to kick off Season 2 with a Bad Batch-centric episode not a Crosshair-centric episode, even if Crosshair’s episode takes place first chronologically; and
2) Rampart learns the Bad Batch is alive in 2.02, but never has Crosshair arrested or monitored as a potential spy or anything -- this only makes sense if Rampart finds out TBB is alive after Crosshair is cleared for duty and has proven his loyalty.
But, ultimately it doesn't matter:
Based on Mayday's comments in 2.12 "The Outpost," early Season 2 has to cover at least 7 more months. That means that months are passing between episodes in early S2.
In 2.12, Mayday says he's been stationed at the Outpost for over a year, and that he wasn't stationed there until after the war ended. So, assuming at least a month after the war for him to be reassigned, and then 13 months for him to be on Barton IV ... 2.12 has to take place at least 14 months after 1.01 "Aftermath."
So, ultimately, I think 2.01/2.02 might take place 3-4 months after the Fall of Kamino in 1.16 "Kamino Lost." It would allow enough time for the Bad Batch to get new clothes, repaint their old armor, and for Omega to start all of her studies while the Bad Batch continues to do jobs for Cid.
Then we probably have another month between 2.02 "Ruins of War" and 2.04 "Faster." Then another month to 2.05 "Entombed." And then another month to 2.06 "Tribe." And then another month to the beginning of 2.07 “The Clone Conspiracy.”
Because of how compressed the back-half of Season 2 is, I think 2.07/2.08 takes place about 13 months after the war ends in 1.01 "Aftermath" and, thus, about 7-8 months after the Fall of Kamino in 1.16 "Kamino Lost."
Now, once we get to 2.07, that's when the timeline starts compressing again based on in-universe clues.
We know 2.08 "Truth and Consequences" takes place almost immediately after 2.07. So, no more than a week seems to pass between the beginning of 2.07 and the end of 2.08.
Then, 2.09 "The Crossing" takes place a few days after 2.08, as Omega is still adjusting to Echo's absence. Then 2.10 "Retrieval" is immediately after 2.09, and 2.11 "Metamorphosis" takes place maybe a day after 2.10.
So, from the beginning of 2.07 to the end of 2.11, maybe two weeks have passed in-universe.
Then, at the beginning of 2.13 "Pabu," Cid remarks that it's been 20 rotations since she last talked to the Bad Batch in 2.11.
From 2.13 to 2.14, I'm guessing 1-2 weeks have passed based on how much of Pabu has been rebuilt since the sea surge and other context clues (like Shep and Hunter's conversation about the Bad Batch staying on Pabu).
Now, we're not exactly sure where 2.12 "The Outpost" falls in the S2 timeline. I'm guessing it's simultaneous with 2.13 "Pabu" for thematic and dramatic reasons, but we see all our various plot threads align in 2.14 "Tipping Point." Everything Echo, Crosshair and Hunter & co. do happens within 2-3 days.
Then, based on Echo's comments, we know 2.15 "The Summit" takes place two days after the Bad Batch's conversation at the end of 2.14 "Tipping Point." And then 2.16 "Plan 99" takes place immediately after 2.15.
So, while I can't speculate much on early S2, I can tell you that 2.07-2.16 spans about two months.
To recap:
2 months between 1.16 "Kamino Lost" and 2.03 "The Solitary Clone"
Several months between 2.01/2.02 and 2.07
A week during 2.07 and 2.08
A few days between 2.08 and 2.09
Another week during 2.09 to 2.11
Three weeks between 2.11 and 2.13
Two weeks between 2.13 and 2.14
A week during 2.14 to 2.16
But, overall, I'm estimating the events of 2.16 "Plan 99" take place 15-16 months after 1.01 "Aftermath."
Unlike the previous two seasons, Season 3 is very compressed. Outside of the time-jump within 3.01 "Confined," the entire season takes place over the course of 5-6 weeks. Not months. Weeks.
Now, again, I actually think 3.02 "Paths Unknown" takes place during the five-month time-jump within 3.01. But that doesn't really matter.
As we see from Omega's tally marks, the end of 3.01 takes place about 5.5 months after 2.16 "Plan 99." So, we have our between-seasons time-jump spelled out for us this time.
This means the end of 3.01 "Confined" takes place 21-22 months after 1.01 "Aftermath."
Skipping over 3.02, episode 3.03 "Shadows of Tantiss" seems to take place within a few days of the end of 3.01. We see that Omega is still being monitored closely after her outburst in the lurca kennels; and Hemlock told Nala Se in 3.01 that the Emperor would be arriving soon to check on their progress, which he does in 3.03. Heck, maybe 3.03 takes place the day after 3.01, but I’ll give a little wiggle room and say it’s been a few days.
Then, we know that the beginning of 3.03 to the end of 3.05 all takes place in a very short amount of time. Maybe a week.
3.04 "A Different Approach" takes place immediately after 3.03, and no more than a day or two passes between the end of 3.04 and the beginning of 3.05 "The Return."
So, from the end of 3.01 to the end of 3.05, two weeks have passed at most.
The gap between 3.05 and 3.06 is the only span of time in S3 we don't have any solid indicators about. It clearly wasn't too long, as Howzer talks about Crosshair escaping Tantiss like it happened fairly recently. Overall, I'd guess it's been maybe a week or two since Crosshair and Omega escaped Tantiss.
Then, 3.07 takes place immediately after 3.06.
Excluding 3.10 "Identity Crisis," we know that 3.08-3.11 all take place within a short amount of time. No more than 2-3 days seem to pass between episodes, and no more than 2-3 days passes within each episode. In total, I'd say these three episodes take place over the course of two weeks.
Thus, I'm guessing 4-5 weeks, or about a month, passes from the end of 3.01 "Confined" to the beginning of 3.11 "Point of No Return."
Then, we know the timeline 3.11 between 3.15 is very short because all the episodes take place almost immediately after each other. The only exception is between 3.12 and 3.13, when maybe 12-24 hours passes based on Omega's movements in the Vault and her brothers' plans to infiltrate the orbital station.
You can round up and say a week, but that almost seems generous to me. Maybe a work week. Like the Empire invaded Pabu Monday night and Omega & co. were back on Pabu Friday morning.
Overall, I think the beginning of 3.11 "Point of No Return" to the end of 3.15 "The Cavalry Has Arrived" spans 3-5 days.
To recap:
5.5 months from the end of 2.16 "Plan 99" to the end of 3.01 "Confined"
A week from the end of 3.01 to the end of 3.05
A week between 3.05 and 3.06/3.07
Three weeks during 3.06/3.07 to 3.11
A week during 3.11 to 3.15
Again, outside of the time-jump within 3.01, the entirety of Season 3 takes place over 1-2 months if we're looking at the larger post-"Aftermath" timeframe.
We know it's not more than 24 months after the war ends, because Wookieepedia would list Hemlock's death in 17 BBY instead of 18 BBY. So no more than 24 calendar months can pass between "The Bad Batch" series premiere and series finale.
But, accounting for things that happen within the show, 22-23 months seems about right. Like, it's been almost two calendar years, but not quite.
So, to give a real-world example, if Palpatine gave his "Revenge of the Sith" speech to reorganize into the Galactic Empire on Jan. 1, 2022, then the big showdown on Tantiss takes place in October or November 2023.
That means:
If Omega was 12 years old when her brothers met her on Kamino, she was 13-14 during the showdown on Tantiss.
After his inhibitor chip activated, Crosshair was separated from his brothers for more than 18 months before finally reconciling with them in 3.05 "The Return."
The Bad Batch worked for Cid for over a year, and she still betrayed them.
Phee and Tech's ~situationship~ might've lasted half-a-year between their first meeting in 2.01 "Spoils of War" and his death in 2.16 "Plan 99."
When Crosshair sent the Plan 88 message, the Bad Batch hadn't seen or heard from him in 8-9 months (since the Fall of Kamino).
Omega only got to spend 15-16 months with Tech before his death in 2.16 “Plan 99.” 😭
Crosshair hadn't seen his brothers for over a year between the Fall of Kamino and escaping Tantiss with Omega.
Omega and Crosshair only spent about 7 months together during the show (5.5 on Tantiss and 1.5 after their escape), and most of that was off-screen. 🙁
Apparently, more time passed between S1 and S2 than during S3 (excluding the time jump and epilogue). Seriously. From the end of 3.01 to the final showdown on Tantiss, the Bad Batch had a very insane and stressful 5-6 weeks. They all looked like they could use a nap in that final group shot under the tree, and I don't blame them!
All the clones (except Omega) aged 3-4 biological years over the course of the show. So, if Hunter & co. were biologically 22 when they met Omega on Kamino, they'd be about 24-25 when they finally settle down on Pabu.
Not sure how this will help people, but I wanted to share it because I've been thinking about how insane this show's timeline -- how loosey-goosey it is in some places while being super-rigid in others.
So, enjoy!
Okay, but imagine:
The Bad Batch and their partners go viral on BookTok because the men pull off all of the book boyfriend roles so well.
Wrecker perfectly does the two hands on the top of the door frame lean, either in a tank showing off his built arms, or a button-down shirt that pulls on his large arms, half the buttons undone showing off his muscular chest. He'd also be 1000% on top of the throwing you over his shoulder and walking away with you.
Hunter would use the hilt of his dagger to tilt your chin up. He'd also be the master of the sleeve roll up and darkening eyes...
Crosshair, unf, where do I start? "You're mine" in his voice, ugh, I'm melting... He'd be able to do the chin tilt, the doorway lean, the 'good girl' perfectly without batting an eye or breaking character... Help .
Echo, king of reading the user manual, reads all of your spicy books and knows exactly what you want, reciting quotes perfectly to you. Also, brushing your hair behind your ear, dragging his thumb along your lower lip...
Tech would build you the most realistic cosplays of your book couples / boyfriends. Also, mechanic tech covered in grease, coveralls tied at the waist, info-dumping on you about the vehicle he's working on?
Happy Bad Batch Day (9/9) to some of my favorite clones in the galaxy!
@tbbs-best-hair, @wrecking-ball-99, @kark-trooper-echo, @exceptionally-minded
@undefeated-dejarik-champion, and even @superiorsniper
May your day be filled with only good and happy things!
You too, @get-gonked!
Pairing: Howzer x fem!Reader / Howzer x Jedi!Reader
Words: 14,310
Tags/Warnings: 18+ only! angst, hurt/comfort, themes of grief/death/mourning, some blood/gore, depression, hallucinations, unrequited feelings, mutual pining, smut, unprotected sex, dirty talk, fingering, oral (m and f receiving), some light dom/sub dynamics, a little cockwarming
Summary: It's been over a year since Howzer has lost his General, and yet, the ghost of your memory still haunts him. His guilt and grief threaten to swallow him whole, until Rex returns to the base with a surprise visitor.
A/N: Reposting because I forgot my taglist. 🤦♀️ No excuse for the word count I fear. I just love Jedi/Clone forbidden love with all my heart, and I love writing dramatic reunions even more.
Previous Work | Next Work | Masterlist
Howzer doesn’t remember how it happened.
Their arrival on Ryloth had come on the heels of an overdrawn battle on Bothawui. The entire battalion was teetering on the edge of exhaustion by the time they had boarded The Eclipse. Their hopes of an extended shore leave were quickly dashed as it was announced by order of the Jedi Council and the Chancellor himself that they would be sent to occupy Ryloth indefinitely.
The General had tried to make the most of it. She’d arranged for the mess to cook the finest meal they could get their hands on, which admittedly wasn’t more than some fresh meats and root vegetables, but the crew didn't complain. And if Howzer caught the smell of alcohol floating about when they walked to their stations, he didn't say anything about it.
Still, no amount of finery or good cheer could hide the truth: the crew was worn ragged and the battalion was ready to snap. The men resolved to keep pushing on for the sake of their General, who had taken their heavy losses the hardest. That night, she’d broken into tears over the new helmets lining their memorial wall, a wall that was nearly full.
Howzer had been with her, had stood with her and her tears. He had seen the General in every state of grief, of anger and pain. He'd also seen her at her very best. He'd seen her bright smile and heard her warm laugh. He'd been there for the moments of victory and the moments of defeat.
She was his General and his closest friend, his guiding star, and he would do anything for her.
Howzer doesn’t remember how it happened, but he does remember her. He remembers everything about her.
His first memory is her as a young commander, and the first time he saw her. It was on Kamino, and the first time she had visited. She'd been there with her Master, who had come to assess the cadets' progress. They had all lined up in neat rows for the inspection. Howzer remembers how tall she had looked in her uniform and cape despite how all the men towered over her.
Howzer can't remember what she said or did. But he can recall her eyes and the warmth in them as she walked past them. He had wanted her to look at him.
His second memory is the first time they met, months later. It was shortly after the start of the war, and the 318th was still in its infancy. The General had just arrived to pick her new battalion up, and as her new Captain, Howzer was part of the honor guard.
Howzer doesn’t remember the words they spoke, only that she was kind and her voice was warm, and when she smiled, the whole world seemed to brighten.
In the years that followed, he got to know her and became her aide. They were together almost every day. They spent time with their men and led them through the horrors of war. She was a natural leader, charismatic and inspiring, and it wasn't long before Howzer was completely devoted to her.
But the war continued, and so did the death. They had lost men and friends, and Howzer had to watch the General suffer each time. Her pain was his. How could it not be?
She was the best thing in his life, his bright light in the darkness, and he was in love with her.
Howzer doesn’t remember when he began thinking of her that way. He thinks he might’ve always loved her, always wanted her. Maybe from the moment he saw her in that corridor.
All he knew is that he'd loved her in every possible way a man could love a woman, just as he knew that his love would never be reciprocated.
But it didn't matter.
As long as he was with her, Howzer would pretend, and he was okay with that. He could live with loving her from afar and keeping his feelings in check. As her Captain, his job was to support her, and he would be the best damn Captain she'd ever had.
He could dream of a different reality where she returned his feelings, one where they were not at war, and maybe one where he was not her clone trooper. He would dream of a life where he could hold her and touch her, where he could kiss her and whisper how much he loved her.
But those were dreams, and nothing more.
And reality was very different now.
Now, the General is nothing more than a memory.
It’s been long enough that pieces of her are starting to fade from his mind, and he hates it. He wants to hang on to her as long as possible, but he knows that his memories are all he has left. He doesn’t have a holo or picture of her. He only has the images in his mind and the broken piece of nova crystal he kept tucked away in his pocket.
Howzer doesn't remember how it happened.
But he knows it’s his fault.
Howzer is the one who let her down. He's the reason she died. He must be, even if he can't remember it, because he can't accept any other reality. He was her Captain and her right-hand man, her closest friend and her most devoted soldier. If she died, it was because he had failed her, and he will never forgive himself for it.
Maybe he deserves to forget.
That thought is worse than the one of her death.
There was a time when he had wondered if his love was a sickness, something to be ashamed of and hidden away. He didn't want his brothers to know and judge him, and he didn't want her to know, either. He'd never acted on his desires. He'd never told her, and maybe that's why this is so much worse.
Maybe this is a punishment, and one he deserves.
He knows he must have done something wrong, something terrible, because no man would be this cursed unless they deserved it. The nightmares, the guilt, the emptiness, it had to be some kind of retribution for his transgressions.
He's tried to forget. He's tried to move on. He's tried to be a better man, a better clone. He's tried to do everything that a good soldier should, but no matter what he does, no matter how hard he tries, his mind always drifts back to her. His thoughts always wander to his memories. He can't shake her. He doesn't know how to. He's never known how.
Every time he closes his eyes to sleep, he sees her. She's the same as the last time he saw her, with her armor and her hair up in its braid, and she is beautiful. Howzer is so happy to see her again, so relieved that she's not gone.
But she is, and he has to tell her.
He tries, but the words don't come out right. Or maybe it's just that he can't say them, that he still doesn't want to accept what had happened after all this time. But the words are stuck in his throat, and his eyes burn, and Howzer knows she's waiting for him to answer her.
And he can't.
She's waiting for him, and he can't.
She deserves to know the truth. She needs to know that she died, that he failed her, and that her death is on his hands.
Howzer can't look at her. He can't face her.
He closes his eyes and waits for her to turn away. He waits for her to leave him, because he doesn't deserve her.
She doesn’t.
Instead, she steps forward and takes his hands into hers. He flinches at her touch, because she shouldn’t be here. She isn't real. She's just another figment of his imagination, his punishment, and he wants her to stop. He can't do this anymore.
"Howzer," she says. "Howzer, look at me."
And he does. He can't help himself. Her face is starting to blur in his memory, he can't remember the exact shade of her eyes, and he doesn't want to forget. Not yet. He opens his eyes and looks at her, but he knows what he'll find.
Blood.
Her blood.
On his hands, on his face, on his chestplate.
There's so much of it, and he can't stop staring at it, at the way it coats her armor and drips onto the floor. He can't look away. He can't do anything.
"Look at me, Howzer," she says again.
But he can't. He can't do it.
He can't look at her, not like this. He can't stand the thought of seeing her face covered in blood, her lifeless eyes staring at him, her body cold and broken and gone.
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," he whispers. "It's all my fault."
"No," she says.
She doesn't say anything else, and Howzer wants to scream. He wants to cry. He wants her to yell at him and berate him, to curse him and hate him. But when he finally gains the courage to look her in the eye, there's nothing there. She's gone.
It's the worst thing he could've imagined.
He's alone.
Last night’s nightmare plays over and over again in his mind as he stands at the holotable, looking over the map and trying not to think of the General.
It's hard. It's always been hard, but it's gotten worse over the last few months. The dreams are more frequent, and the pain is more intense. He doesn't know how to stop them, or if they will ever stop.
He thought it would get better when he joined Rex's group, that he would find some semblance of peace with the other clones fighting the good fight, but he was wrong.
There is no peace for him, not after what he did.
The others are talking around him, but Howzer is only half listening. It's the usual stuff: what their next move will be, how many supplies they have, and the list goes on. Rex is expected to return from a meeting with Senator Chuchi any minute, and this meeting is more about making sure the captain is updated on what he missed.
But the details escape Howzer. He's distracted by his thoughts, and his guilt is eating at him. It's all he can think about, and he can't shake the feeling that he doesn't deserve to be here.
"Howzer."
The sound of his name brings him back to reality, and he realizes everyone is looking at him.
"Uh, sorry," he says. "What was the question?"
Echo studies him. His gaze is intense, and Howzer has the distinct impression that he's being read. It's a disconcerting feeling, one that he's felt more than a few times in the last couple months since his rescue, and it makes him feel transparent. Like his armor is gone and his emotions are on display.
But that can't be the case, because Howzer hasn't told him what happened.
No one knows the truth, not even the men. Howzer hasn't told anyone about his part in his General's death, and he's not planning to either. There's no point in dredging up the past. He knows he’s not the only clone with guilt about what happened to the Jedi, what they had done.
He’s just the only one who can’t seem to let it go.
"I asked if you were alright," Echo says. "You've seemed a little off the last few days.”
Howzer nods.
"Yeah, I'm fine," he says. "Just a little tired."
The lie slips off his tongue easily, and it's one he's told more than a few times before. He's not fine, and he hasn't been since that day, but there's no need to burden his brothers with his problems.
Echo doesn't look convinced, and he's about to open his mouth to ask another question when Rex finally arrives. The captain's entrance is followed by a chorus of greetings and welcomes, and the tension in the room dissipates. The men are happy to see him, and Howzer is thankful for the distraction.
The Captain greets the men, and then he turns to Howzer.
"Howzer," Rex says. "Do you mind if I speak to you privately?"
"Of course not, Captain," Howzer answers.
Rex leads Howzer out of the command center and down the corridor. The walk is silent, and Howzer can feel the tension building between them. Rex hasn't said a word, and he has no idea why he wants to talk to him. Maybe it's about his recent performance, or lack thereof. He hasn't been the most reliable or helpful lately.
Howzer is starting to worry in earnest when they turn, moving away from the section of the compound that holds Rex's makeshift office and toward the doors leading out to the landing zone. Walking slightly in front of him, Rex is tense, his shoulders stiff and his jaw set. Whatever he has to say, it must be serious.
Rex finally stops in front of the closed blast doors and turns to Howzer. His expression is neutral, and it's impossible to tell what's going on in his head.
"Rex," Howzer begins, unable to bear the silence any longer, "if this is about my work, I understand. I haven't been on top of things the last few days, and if you need to put someone else on comms, I—"
Rex puts his hand up.
"That's not why I asked you out here, Howzer," Rex says. "There's someone here you need to see."
Howzer raises an eyebrow, confused.
"I don't understand," he says. "Who's here?"
"Just follow me."
Rex punches in a code, and the doors slide open. The light from outside fills the hallway, and Howzer blinks at the sudden brightness. He steps out into the landing zone, following Rex into the sunlight. The air is warm and dry, and he can already feel the heat radiating from the cracked duracrete beneath his boots.
"What are we doing out here, Rex?" he asks.
Rex doesn't answer, just keeps walking across the landing zone toward the ship. The Remora stands alone on the platform, ramp already drawn. Howzer squints in an effort to see inside the darkness of the vessel, looking for a spot of white plastoid among the shadows.
But what steps forward isn’t a clone at all.
Howzer recognizes you instantly, and he suddenly feels like he’s about to faint.
His vision tunnels, and the world tilts on its axis. He can hear his heart pounding in his ears, and his breath is coming too fast, too hard. There's a roaring sound, like the sound of a rushing river, and it drowns out everything else. He feels sick, and his legs are shaking.
It can't be real. It can't be.
But it is.
There’s a loud clang, and he dimly realizes his helmet has fallen from his hands. It's lying on the ground now, at his feet, but he can't seem to find the strength to pick it up. All he can do is stare.
You descend the ramp slowly and place a hesitant foot onto the ground. The corners of your lips curl into an uncertain smile, while Howzer remains frozen, trapped in disbelief.
You take a step forward, and he still doesn't move. He's rooted to the spot, his heart racing, and he's afraid.
Howzer knows he's hallucinating. He's been here before. This isn't the first time you've appeared to him, not the first time you've looked at him with those warm eyes and called his name. But every time he reaches out, the mirage vanishes. He's tried. He's tried so hard to reach you.
He knows he's going to wake up, and you will be gone again.
It doesn't stop him from wanting to believe that it's real. That you're here.
Your smile falters when you notice his helmet on the ground, and Howzer watches your eyes search his. They're the same as they've always been, bright and kind, and full of concern. It's too much. It's always been too much.
"Howzer," you say. "Are you okay?"
"No," he says.
You step closer, and Howzer instinctively backs away. You stop. Your brows furrow, and your eyes fill with hurt, and it makes his stomach twist. He wants to go to you, to pull you close and hold you, but he doesn't. He can't.
This isn't real. None of it is real.
He has to tell you.
"What do you mean? What's wrong?" you ask.
You're still walking toward him, and Howzer has to force himself not to run. He has to stop this before it goes any further. He can't let himself fall prey to his delusions, not again.
"No, it's not real," he says.
You frown. "What's not real?"
"You," he whispers. "You're not real. None of this is."
You stop, your eyes wide and worried. "Howzer, what are you talking about?"
He ignores you. He has to make you understand.
"You're dead," he says. His voice breaks on the last word, and it comes out as a choked sob.
The words hang between the two of you, and Howzer braces himself for the inevitable. He knows what will happen. You'll disappear. He's seen it happen enough times, and he can't bear to go through it again.
He closes his eyes and tries to focus, to steady his breathing and keep the tears at bay.
But when he opens his eyes, you're still there.
And then the impossible happens.
You move forward, and he doesn't stop you. He doesn't flinch or back away when you reach out and put your hands on his shoulders. He can't.
Your touch is solid. Real.
You're real.
His legs give way, forcing him to collapse heavily onto his knees. He can't bear the weight anymore. The grief, the guilt, the shame. It's too much.
“I failed you, General,” he says around the lump in his throat threatening to choke him. Howzer squeezes his burning eyes shut, willing the tears away, but they come regardless. He feels his body tremble, his shoulders shaking as he fights against the sob rising in his chest. He tries to take a deep breath, but his lungs won't cooperate, and all he manages is a choked gasp.
“I…I’m so sorry.”
"Howzer, Howzer, please look at me."
It's not a request.
Your voice is commanding, the way he remembers, and it's enough to coax him into opening his eyes. Looking at you directly is almost too painful to bear, like looking directly at Ryloth’s sun, but he does.
Tears are streaming down your face, but a gentle smile still curves your lips. The hand on his shoulder moves to cup his face, thumb tracing the marred skin of his cheek. Unbidden, the memory of you holding him when he received the wound years ago comes to mind. Howzer hadn't seen it then, but the affection is clear now.
"It's okay," you say, softly.
"It's not," he replies. "I shouldn't have let you go."
Your hand moves to his jaw, and you gently tilt his chin upwards. He wants to lean into the touch, to bask in the warmth of your skin, but he can't. He doesn't deserve this. Not after what he did.
"I should've known. I should've—"
"Stop," you cut him off.
Your voice is firm, but the hand on his jaw is soft and gentle, and your eyes are still kind. He wants so badly to believe that this is real, that you're really here, but the doubts linger. He can't let himself fall into the illusion. He can't let himself lose you again.
"You can't blame yourself for this, Howzer. It wasn't your fault."
"I failed you."
"No, Howzer," you say. "You didn't."
He doesn't know what to say. Your hand is still on his face. Your fingers are trembling.
“I forgive you," you whisper the words softly, and it's more than he deserves. "I forgave you long ago."
It's too much.
His composure breaks, and he wraps his arms around your hips, burying his face in your stomach. His tears are hot and wet, and they soak through the fabric of your shirt. His sobs are loud and broken, and he can barely breathe, but he can't stop, and you don't push him away. The hand on his cheek cups the back of his head, and your other arm wraps around his shoulders.
"I'm so sorry," he whispers.
He isn't sure if you hear him. He's not sure if he wants you to. But you must, because your grip tightens, and your hand runs through his hair.
He holds you, clinging to you like a lifeline, and lets the tears flow. He can't hold back the sobs, the pain, the anger. All of the emotions are coming to the surface, and they won't be held back any longer.
He cries for you, for the pain you endured. For the loss and the hurt. He cries for himself, for the guilt and the shame. He cries because it hurts, and because he's relieved, and because he can't believe this is real and he's so kriffing happy to see you again.
When his tears finally stop, you're still there, still holding him, and he's still kneeling in front of you. His shoulders are stiff, his muscles sore, but he can't find the strength to move.
He doesn't want to.
He wants to stay like this forever.
Eventually, you break the silence.
“Is there somewhere we can go to speak in private?” you ask quietly. Your fingers run through the buzzed hair at the back of his head and linger on the scar there, the one he doesn’t have a story for. A shiver runs down his spine before his brain catches up to your question.
Howzer nods and clears his throat.
"Yeah," he says, his voice hoarse. "My room. We can talk there."
You help him stand, and he takes a moment to collect himself, wiping his eyes. When he looks at you again, he feels a hot sting of embarrassment. It's been a long time since he's let himself fall apart like this, and he's not sure how to act, and he's grateful there's no one else around to witness it.
You don't seem bothered by his breakdown. You smile, and it's soft and warm, and his heart does a strange flip.
"Are you okay?" you ask, and your concern is so genuine that it almost brings fresh tears to his eyes. His emotions feel raw, like an open wound, and he's not sure how much more he can take before he's completely overwhelmed, but when he answers this time, he speaks the truth.
"I will be," he says as he kneels to collect his helmet.
You nod, and there's a hint of relief in your eyes, but the smile on your face never wavers as you step up to his side. He’s surprised to feel your hand threading through the crook of his elbow before he realizes it was he who had held out his arm for you. A force of habit he didn't know he still had, but one that was very welcome.
It had always been your way, before. To walk beside him instead of ahead.
He takes a deep breath and straightens his shoulders.
"Shall we?"
"Yes," you say, smiling.
As the two of you begin to make your way across the landing zone, Howzer can't help but marvel at how natural this feels. The familiarity of your presence at his side, the soft pressure of your hand against his arm, and the sound of your breathing.
All of it feels so right, and Howzer thinks it must be a dream, a hallucination, something, because this is too perfect. It can't be real. It's been far too long for it to be real.
But the weight of your arm on his and the sound of your footsteps at his side feel real, more real than anything he's ever experienced. He's never had a hallucination this vivid before. He hopes it's not just a dream, but he keeps his eyes on you just to make sure.
You look different. Older, maybe. But also more beautiful.
It's a silly thought, but it's the truth. There's a certain peace and calmness to your expression, and it suits you. You look content, like you've finally found what you were looking for, and Howzer feels a rush of joy.
You're alive.
He still can't quite believe it, and he finds himself staring openly at you. He knows the path to his room like the back of his hand, and he could probably make the trek with his eyes closed. But he doesn't.
Instead, he keeps his eyes on you, memorizing every detail, every curve of your face and every twitch of your mouth. He's desperate to fill in the gaps in his memory, the details he's lost and the moments that slipped away. He doesn't want to forget again.
Your head is on a swivel as you take in the equipment and clones bustling around the enclosed space inside the temple. It reminds him of your first day, and he can't help but smile. You haven't changed at all.
Echo and Rex are in the command center along with a handful of other clones. They watch as the two of you walk through, their faces showing a range of expressions from surprise to confusion to suspicion. But they say nothing, and Howzer is grateful. He knows how he looks, with his reddened eyes and blotchy cheeks. They’ll no doubt have questions later, but for now, they keep them to themselves.
“What you’ve built here is impressive,” you say as you give a friendly smile to Samson when you pass by. He does a double-take, his gaze moving from your face to your arm wrapped around Howzer's, and back to your face again.
Howzer smiles back and doesn't offer any explanation.
Samson isn't the only one looking. Several of the men stare, and Howzer can't help the small thrill of pride that courses through him at their wide-eyed looks.
It's a silly thought, he knows. He shouldn't feel good about being seen with you, not after everything that's happened. But he can't deny the satisfaction he feels at the thought that the men can see the two of you together again, and he wonders how many of them had guessed about his feelings.
Probably all of them.
"This is it," Howzer says as the two of you stop outside the door to the room he claimed as his own.
It's not much—a single bed, a locker, and a desk—but it's enough. It's a quiet place to escape to when the chaos of the galaxy around him becomes too much, though he hasn't spent much time in it since he arrived.
Howzer steps forward and places his hand on the panel, and the door slides open. He motions for you to enter first, and you do, letting go of his arm as you step into the room.
You take a moment to study your surroundings before your eyes land on the lone chair in the room. Howzer can tell what you're thinking. You're going to offer it to him, and he doesn't want it. He can't imagine sitting right now. His legs still feel like jelly and his whole body is still buzzing from the adrenaline of seeing you.
Instead, Howzer leans against the wall by the door and takes a deep breath, watching as you walk forward to examine his desk, your back to him.
The room is quiet, the only sound the faint buzzing of the lights above them. He can't hear the commotion outside. He can't even hear his own heartbeat. All he can hear is you, your soft, slow breathing and the gentle rustle of fabric as you move.
He hesitates to break the silence, but he has to know.
“How are you—how did you survive?” he asks. How are you alive, he wants to say. You shouldn’t be alive. The words stick in his throat.
You stiffen slightly, but you don't turn around. The latest report on their medical supplies is held loosely in your grasp, and Howzer watches the datapad tremble slightly.
“You truly don’t remember?” you ask softly, dropping the report back onto the desk. You pivot to face him, your back pressing into the metal edge, and he can't read your expression.
He swallows. His throat feels dry, and his heart is pounding in his ears.
No. He doesn’t remember. But he needs to.
He shakes his head, the motion almost imperceptible. “No, I…I remember we were speaking in your quarters. I can’t remember what about. There was an incoming transmission, and then…nothing.”
Whatever he said, it must not have been the right thing. Your eyes close as if in pain, your fists clenching at your sides. You inhale a sharp, shaky breath. The sight is almost enough to make him drop the subject. But the need to know is greater than the guilt.
“Please." He says your name quietly, hating the desperation that creeps into his voice. "I need to know.”
He realizes that he’s never called you by your first name before, at least not to your face. It had always been General. He thinks he likes the sound of it, and the way it makes your eyes fly open, surprise and a little bit of warmth filling their depths.
The seconds drag on as he waits for your response, the tension palpable between you. The longer he stares at you, the more he notices. Your jaw is sharper now, your skin slightly more tan. Your hair is the same, and so are your eyes, but there's a new air of maturity to you that hadn't been there before. He's not sure how he feels about the changes, only that he wishes he had been there to see them happen.
When you finally speak, the words are careful and measured. “I can show you, if you let me.”
"Show me?"
"If I'm allowed, I could—"
"Yes," he says. He doesn’t hesitate. He trusts you, and he needs to know what happened.
"Okay," you say, taking a step toward him. "This may hurt."
A moment of silent understanding passes between you before Howzer nods, steeling himself for whatever revelation awaits. You reach out tentatively, pausing a few inches away, and he closes his eyes.
Your fingers press into his temple, and he’s suddenly thrust back into your quarters on Ryloth.
“You seem upset,” your voice says, wavering as if underwater until the haze of the memory begins to lift around you.
The blurry shape of you comes into sharper focus as you move to sit on your bunk. Your beige robes have been discarded, revealing the sleeveless wrap tunic you wear underneath. Another hot evening on Ryloth meant you'd forgone decorum again, loosening the top to allow airflow to your sweat-slicked skin. He remembers admiring the strong lines of your biceps and valley of your breasts revealed with the motion.
He’s in the memory but not entirely, watching himself from the outside like a specter in the shadows. Howzer watches as he forces himself to look away from your body to stare out the window. He can feel the same tension, the same anxiety that gripped him then. He remembers the argument you had that morning. Remembers the hurt, the pain, the guilt. Remembers wanting to reach out, to hold you, but stopping himself.
“What’s on your mind?”
“You,” he answers honestly, for once. It’s a half-truth that sticks to his tongue. “Is it true that this will all be over soon?”
“I’ve felt it coming for a while now,” you say.
Your eyes drift to your hands, and he turns to watch you lace your fingers together tightly in your lap. “Count Dooku is dead. Obi-Wan has moved to engage General Grievous. Saesee and General Windu are arresting the Chancellor as we speak. The war very well may be over now.”
“I see.”
A sense of fatigue washes over him, and he leans against the wall to prop himself up. He wants to leave, to soak the feeling in while in the silence of his own barracks, but something stronger urges him to stay.
“Permission to speak freely, sir.”
“You always have my permission, Howzer,” you say earnestly. It had taken some getting used to, being addressed so informally. The first few times, he'd had to force himself not to jump to attention every time you called him by name. He quickly started to enjoy the intimacy of it, and the way the sound of his name on your lips made him shiver.
He sighs, rubbing his eyes with the palms of his hands. He doesn't know where to begin. The last few months have been hard, harder than most, and it's left him feeling raw and exhausted. He's never felt so torn before. Part of him is thrilled that the war is ending, but the other part, the larger, selfish part, is terrified.
“What will happen to us?” he asks, turning to look at you.
Your face is neutral, but he can tell by the set of your jaw that you're tense. The memory of you takes a moment to collect yourself before speaking.
"What do you mean?"
"After the war," he says, trying and failing to keep the edge of panic out of his voice. "What will happen to us?"
“The clones have fought honorably for the Republic. It’s the least we can do to provide for your future,” you reply. “You’ll be given pensions and housing on Coruscant for as long as you all wish. I expect some will continue their roles in reserve, while the rest will be free to choose their own path.”
He nods appreciatively. He has no idea what he would do with such freedom, but he's grateful all the same. The thought of no longer having a purpose terrifies him, but not nearly as much as the thought of losing you.
He should leave it at that, he should thank you and walk away. Howzer is watching the internal battle he faced on that day and screams at himself to leave. He should leave you be, to enjoy the brief respite the two of you are allowed.
But he can't. Not when this could be the last chance he ever gets.
“Thank you. But I…I meant us, sir.” Howzer gestures between the two of you.
Your eyes widen almost imperceptibly, but he can see he’s stunned you. He forges ahead, moving to stare at the wall behind you so he can maintain his courage. “We’ve been together so long, I can barely remember a time without you. Without this. I don't want it to end."
There's a pregnant pause as you struggle for a response, and the fear in the pit of his stomach grows.
“What are you saying?” you ask slowly.
“I’m saying I want more,” he says. He meets your gaze and steps forward, and you rise to your feet at the same time, your tunic fluttering around you.
“Us clones try not to think about the future, but I can't help it. And the only future I want is one with you. That is, if you want that too, sir."
His cheeks are flushed, and his heart is pounding, and he's so nervous. This is the most he's ever confessed, and it feels like the world is crashing down around him, but he means every word.
“Howzer…” Your voice breaks, and it sends a hammer to his heart. “I…I don’t know what to say.”
“Say you feel the same,” he says quickly. Howzer’s hand reaches out to grasp your bicep, thumb caressing the bare skin underneath his glove. He moves closer, and your breath hitches as you lean back, but not away.
Your eyes close, head tilting down. He waits with bated breath for you to say something, anything.
When you look up, your eyes are filled with tears, and his stomach drops. Your voice is so quiet, he can barely hear you.
“I feel afraid.”
It's like the wind has been knocked out of him. He opens his mouth to speak, to question you further, but his vambrace begins to ping, the message marked urgent. Howzer watches himself let go of you and turn to receive the transmission, and he feels like he's drowning.
No! He screams at himself. Don't take the call. He can't breathe, can't think, can't do anything but watch. You can't let this go. If you lose this chance, you'll never have another.
He's frozen, helpless to watch his past play out. You move toward the window to look out at the setting sun as Howzer opens the encrypted message.
“Execute Order 66,” the hooded figure on the holo speaks, its voice graveled and dark. In his memory, Howzer stares down at the projection with wide, unseeing eyes, before he begins to shake. Something is taking over, something he isn’t strong enough to control.
He knows what he must do.
A cold, heavy weight settles in the pit of his stomach, and his mind feels foggy, sluggish. Howzer looks up from the holo, and the room seems to spin. His hands are trembling, and his heart is pounding in his ears. He blinks hard, once, twice, trying to clear the fog, but it won't go away. A wave of nausea hits him, and his head feels like it's about to explode.
"Howzer?"
Your voice is far away, barely a whisper. You turn, your lips parted, brow creased.
He barely has time to get the words out, to fight the fog for just a second. Just one more second.
"Run," he croaks. He watches his eyes glaze over, watches the last remnants of his control slip through his fingers as he turns, drawing his blaster and firing.
You ignite your lightsaber just in time to deflect the shot aimed at your head. Behind the teal blue glow of your blade, your eyes are wide and confused.
“Howzer?” you ask incredulously. Your arms are raised, holding your saber aloft. But your stance is hesitant, your knees bent as if ready to run.
The blaster is in his hand, and it's pointed at you. It's an impossible weight. A weapon made for killing, a weapon he can't use on you. His hand trembles, and he wills himself to throw it, to break it.
But the fog in his mind is too thick, the orders too loud, and his body moves without him. The trigger clicks under his finger again and again. You duck and roll as a bolt goes whizzing over your head, deflecting another into the ceiling. Plaster and dust rain down, clouding the air around you. You cough, covering your nose and mouth with the back of your free hand.
"Howzer, please, it's me!" you cry, raising the hilt of your saber. It's not meant to fight, only to protect. A shield against the bolts that won't stop coming.
He's screaming at you, screaming for you to move, to run away, but the words aren't leaving his mouth. The next bolt grazes your shoulder, tearing your tunic. The pain makes you cry out. Howzer can see the wound, red and angry against your skin.
He hears the sound of footsteps and voices getting closer outside the door, but he’s too occupied with the need to fire his blaster to acknowledge them. Howzer’s mind screams that he’s trapped alone with a traitor to the Republic, a burning hatred he’s never felt propelling him forward to attack.
The small voice inside him begging him not to hurt you is silenced for good when an unseen force rips the weapon from his hand. His arm is held aloft above his head, and he struggles like an animal in a trap to free it.
His eyes are wide and feral. Yours are nothing but pleading.
"Please," you beg. "You're stronger than this. I know you are. I can't hurt you."
"Traitor," he spits, struggling against the invisible bonds. "You'll die a traitor."
There are tears streaming down your face now, and he can see the agony in your eyes. The anguish and pain. But also a strength, a determination he's seen many times.
Fists are pounding on the door, and it tears your attention away from him for a moment too long. Howzer’s arm frees itself, and he wastes no time reaching for the blaster carbine on his back. Your eyes snap back to him, and you quickly hold out both hands to push him back into the wall.
Even during training, you were remarkably gentle with your use of the Force. Howzer had seen you throw boulders and pull tanks with your command of the unseen energy field, but he’d never felt more than a soft touch until that day.
But in this memory, you hurl him across the room with the force of a landslide, knocking the breath clear from his lungs, his head slamming hard enough to crack the duracrete.
He tries to stand, but he can't.
His arms won't work, and his legs are leaden, refusing to respond. He's helpless as he watches you raise your arm, your eyes filled with sorrow. He's powerless as you reach out and touch your fingers to his temple.
A warmth emanates from your fingertips, and Howzer feels the pressure in his skull building, building, until—
The memory vanishes, and Howzer finds himself back in his own quarters, slumped against the wall. You're still there, standing a few steps away. You have your arms crossed tightly, your jaw clenched.
Howzer can feel his head pounding, a throbbing phantom pain where it had struck the wall. He raises his fingers to rub his temples.
It's quiet. There's no pounding on the door, no gunfire. Just the two of you.
"So it's true. I almost killed you."
You flinch. It's so subtle, he wouldn't have noticed it if he hadn't been looking for it.
"You didn't," you say.
He shakes his head. "I didn't? It looked pretty fucking close. You did that—" He motions vaguely toward the door. "—to stop me."
"To stop myself," you correct. "You didn't have a choice. I couldn't hurt you."
Howzer's jaw clenches, and his throat feels tight. The memory is still fresh in his mind, and the feelings it elicited are not ones he'd like to relive. The shame, the fear, the guilt.
"But I did," he says. His voice is low, and his tone is grave. "I'm so sorry."
"I'm sorry, too," you whisper, your voice barely audible. You look away from him, and your shoulders droop. "I didn't know. If I'd known the clones had been reprogrammed, I would have tried to find a way to reverse it. To bring you back. All of you."
You sniff, wiping your eyes, and Howzer feels his chest ache. You're blaming yourself. Of course you are.
"Howzer, if there's anything I can do—"
"Don't apologize," he says. His voice is stronger now, and he's glad. He's tired of being weak. Having you here is a reminder of everything he's done wrong, but also of what he could have. What he wants. He straightens, pulling himself away from the wall and standing upright.
"You saved my life. You didn't know what was going to happen. No one did. And even if you had, it would have been too late."
Your brows knit together, and you look back at him. Your lower lip trembles. "How can you forgive me?"
Howzer doesn't know how to answer that. He's not sure there is an answer. Instead, he walks forward, slowly, as if approaching a skittish animal. You look so small, so vulnerable, and he hates it. He can see the worry in your eyes, the guilt. It's the same worry and guilt he's seen in the mirror every day since the war ended.
He's only a step away when he stops, leaving enough space between the two of you that you could walk away if you wanted. But you don't, and the look in your eyes is enough to make him reach out. He wipes a tear from your cheek, and the corner of your mouth twitches.
"How can you forgive me?" he asks instead.
"Because you were doing your duty. Because I care about you. Because I missed you," you say.
"I missed you, too."
You're so close, close enough to touch, and Howzer can't resist the urge. He wraps his arms around you and pulls you into a hug, letting the tension ease from his body. You lean into his embrace, and he rests his chin on top of your head, closing his eyes and savoring the feeling of having you back.
He's not sure how long the two of you stand there, lost in the embrace, but eventually, you pull away. Howzer reluctantly lets go, dropping his arms back to his sides. You look up at him, and the smile on your face makes his stomach flip.
"What you said," you start, swallowing. "That night. Did you mean it?"
He doesn't have to think.
"Yes."
Your breath hitches, and your eyes search his, seeking something. He knows what it is, and it scares him. The last time he laid his heart bare for you, he’d lost everything. But he's spent too much time living in the past. Too much time wishing things were different, regretting the choices he made.
He doesn't want to do that anymore.
"I meant it then, and I still mean it now."
"Really?"
"I do."
He reaches out and takes your hand, lifting it to his lips.
You bite your lip. He can tell you're nervous, and he feels the same. His stomach is fluttering, and his heart is racing. The moment seems surreal, too good to be true.
But he can feel the warmth of your palm in his, can feel the softness of your skin.
"I missed you," he says softly.
"I missed you, too."
Your words are barely a whisper, but they echo in his mind. He can't resist any longer.
"I want to kiss you,” he admits, his voice low. He runs his thumb over the back of your hand, and your skin tingles beneath his touch. "Can I kiss you?"
"Yes," you whisper.
He leans down, pressing his forehead against yours. Your eyes flutter shut, and your breath tickles his lips. He can't resist any longer.
Howzer tilts his head and closes the gap between you.
It's slow, tentative, and he's terrified. But when you melt into him, and your lips part against his, all of his fears and doubts are forgotten.
You're real. You're here, with him.
Your hand grips his armor as you kiss him back, and the world falls away. All that matters is you, and him, and this moment.
He feels whole.
The kiss is long and lingering. It's slow, and sweet, and everything he could have ever hoped for. Your hand finds its way to the back of his neck, and your fingers play with the short hair there. His own hands roam over your waist and back, mapping out the lines of your body.
He feels you shift onto your toes, pressing against him and pulling him closer, and his heart soars. He can't imagine wanting anything more than this, than the taste of your lips on his, the feel of your body pressed against his.
When the two of you finally part, his lips are tingling, and he can't help but chase yours for another quick peck before he pulls back. You're breathless, and your cheeks are flushed, and he feels his chest swell, his hands tightening around your waist.
He never wants to let go.
"I love you," he whispers, his voice cracking. He doesn't want to ruin the moment, but he needs you to know. He needs you to hear the words, the sincerity behind them. "I think I always have."
"I love you, too," you say, and it's like the sun coming out after a storm. "I didn't realize until it was too late, but I love you. I don't think I've ever stopped."
His heart swells at the words. He can't believe his ears, can't believe he's hearing you say them. His throat is thick, and his eyes burn, and he blinks back the tears.
Howzer pulls you close, burying his face in your hair and breathing in deeply as his arms wrap around you. He holds you tightly, and you cling to him just as fiercely.
"Stay," he murmurs into your hair, the words barely audible. "Please."
He can feel the way your muscles tense. You pull back, just enough to look at him. "What?"
"Stay," he repeats, looking into your eyes. "With us. With me."
He watches you blink, the surprise evident on your face. He realizes what he's asking of you. How much of a risk it is. You could be killed or taken prisoner by the Empire, and he's asking you to put your life in the hands of the very people who tried to kill you.
But he has to try.
"Howzer, I—I can't. It's too dangerous. If I'm caught—"
"I won't let anything happen to you. I promise." He reaches up and cradles your face in his hand, brushing his thumb across your cheek. "Please. I've lost you once. I can't lose you again."
Your eyes search his, and he can see the doubt, the fear. He's never begged anyone for anything before, but he'll beg for you. He'll do whatever it takes.
"Please," he says, his voice cracking. "I need you."
"Howzer," you say, but he can tell you're weakening. Your eyes are watery, and your brow is furrowed.
"I can't do this without you. I can't—I don't want to do this without you."
Your shoulders drop, and your head tilts slightly into his touch. You cover his hand with yours, squeezing gently. You sigh, and his heart sinks. He’s prepared to hear a no. To lose you once more, only this time, willingly. He watches as you take a deep breath, steadying yourself.
"Okay," you say softly.
He's speechless. For a moment, the word doesn't register. He's too afraid to hope.
"Okay?"
You nod. "I'll stay. If you'll have me."
He can't help the broad grin that spreads across his face, and he pulls you close, his arms wrapping around you and lifting you off the ground. You squeak, but you laugh, and the sound fills him with joy. He spins, hugging you tight as you giggle into his neck.
He's elated, and he can't hold back the laugh that bubbles up from his chest. He feels light, like a weight has been lifted from his shoulders. As soon as your feet touch the ground he's kissing you again, cupping your face and tasting the smile on your lips.
He loves you. You love him. You're staying.
The thought is so incredible, so wonderful, that he can't stop kissing you, and you don't seem to mind. He pours all his emotions, all his love, into each brush of his lips, hoping that you can feel everything he's feeling, hoping that you understand how much this means to him.
He thinks you must.
Your arms wrap around his shoulders, pulling him close. His hands drift down to your waist, and his thumbs brush against the skin where your tunic has ridden up. He kisses you deeper, and the moan that escapes your lips sends a bolt of heat straight through him.
His heart is pounding, and he can't get enough of you. His tongue brushes against your bottom lip, and you part your lips for him, letting him taste you. The kiss grows deeper, hungrier, and his grip on you tightens, drawing you flush against him.
One of your hands moves to his chest, the other threading through his hair. Your touch sets him on fire, and he can feel himself straining against the confines of his armor. He doesn't know how far this is going, but he can't stop, can't bring himself to pull away.
Not when your teeth sink into his lower lip, or your nails scrape against his scalp. Not when you arch into him, your soft chest pressing into his chestplate. Not when his hands explore your body, mapping out every curve and dip, every muscle and bone.
His tongue brushes against yours, and he moans. He wants more, so much more. He's lost in you, and he doesn't want to find his way back.
"Tell me to stop," he says, his voice rough. His lips move to your jaw, and he trails kisses down your neck, the taste of you intoxicating.
The room spins, and Howzer finds himself pressed against the wall, the cold duracrete sending a shiver down his spine. Your hands are gripping the edge of his chest plate, and your lips are hot and demanding. You bite his lower lip, tugging at it, and his eyes flutter shut.
"No." Your voice is husky, and the sound goes straight to his cock. "Don't stop."
His heart leaps into his throat, and his hands grip your waist, pulling you closer. "I want you."
"I'm yours."
The words are a balm on his soul, healing wounds he didn't know he had. He can't get enough, can't stop kissing you. He nearly whines when you break away from his mouth, but the disappointment is short-lived when your lips move to his neck. He gasps, the sensation of your hot mouth and wet tongue overwhelming.
Your hands trail down his body, and his fingers dig into your hips.
"I love you," he moans. His head falls back, and his eyes flutter shut. His entire body is on fire, and the sound of your lips smacking against his neck only adds fuel to the flames. "Fuck, I love you."
You hum against his skin, and he bites back a groan.
"I love you," you whisper, the words ghosting over his neck. "I need you.”
It's all he can take.
His hands reach under your ass and lift, and you wrap your legs around his waist. The kiss is sloppy and uncoordinated, and his teeth clack against yours as he spins and presses you against the wall. You grind against his codpiece, and he breaks the kiss, hissing.
"You're so kriffing beautiful," he groans, his voice ragged. "You drive me crazy."
You're panting, and your cheeks are flushed, and he feels his cock twitch at the sight.
"I missed you," you say again. "I needed you."
He doesn't want to admit how close to home those words hit.
"I'm here now." His voice is rough, and his hands are gripping your hips tightly. "I'm not going anywhere."
"Good," you say, before pulling him back into another kiss.
It's hard and messy and desperate. You're both clinging to each other like your lives depend on it, and it's almost painful, the need that's taken root inside him. He's wanted you for so long, and now that he's here, with you in his arms, he can't get enough. He can't stop.
You pull back, and his head tilts up to chase your lips. He's dizzy with lust and want, his breathing shallow.
"Howzer, can we—" Your voice is breathless, and your eyes are wild.
He nods, understanding immediately.
He kisses you hard, and he can feel your hands fumbling for the clasps on his chestplate. He doesn't want to let go, doesn't want to lose the contact between the two of you, but he does, if only to help you.
It's not long before the heavy plastoid is removed, tossed haphazardly onto the floor. You waste no time, moving on to his greaves. You're so close, your scent clouding his mind, and his skin prickles beneath the intensity of your gaze. If he wasn’t so dizzy with want, he’d be amused at how focused you are, the way your brows are furrowed and your bottom lip caught between your teeth. But he can't think straight, can barely even breathe.
The pieces fall to the floor, and the sound echoes through the quiet room. By the time his bracers are removed, he's already shaking. He can't help it. It's been so long, and the desire coursing through his veins is threatening to overwhelm him.
He pulls at the laces on your tunic, loosening them enough that he can tug the material down. He leans down, trailing kisses down the newly exposed skin. Your breath hitches, and his name is a sigh on your lips. He smiles against your collarbone, nipping lightly before he sucks a mark into the flesh.
"Kriff," you gasp, your hips jerking forward. "Howzer."
The sound of his name sends a jolt of electricity down his spine, and he moans. He pulls back to lift your tunic over your head, discarding it somewhere behind him. You're bare except for your breastband, and his eyes rake over your body, taking in the sight of you, mapping the scars and curves and dips. Most of them he's seen before, the few times you were injured during the war, but the new ones, the ones he doesn't know, they're more than he can handle.
He reaches out, tentatively running his fingers over a blaster burn on your stomach, and the skin jumps underneath his touch.
"Is this okay?" he asks.
"Yes," you say, nodding.
He runs his palm over the scar, tracing its edges. The flesh is puckered and pink, and he knows it's a wound that could have killed you. It’s one he should have been there to prevent.
"Does it hurt?" he asks, his voice barely a whisper.
You shake your head. "Not anymore."
He traces the scar, committing it to memory. There are others, some fresher, some older, and his eyes follow his fingers, touching each and every one.
When he's done, he meets your gaze. Your eyes are wide, and your lips are parted, and he feels his chest tighten. You're so beautiful. So perfect. And you're here, with him.
"Are you okay?" you ask.
"I'm fine," he says, shaking his head. "Better than fine. You?”
"Me too."
His hands move to your back, finding the clasp of your breastband and releasing it. He holds his breath as the band comes loose, and his eyes drop down to take in the sight of your bare chest. His cock twitches in his pants, and he has to stifle a groan.
"Beautiful," he murmurs, reaching out and brushing his fingers against your breast. "Absolutely perfect."
His calloused thumb scrapes against your nipple, and it hardens instantly. Your breath hitches, and he feels his pulse quicken. He wants to hear the sounds you make, wants to know what his touch does to you.
He leans down, and his lips replace his fingers. His mouth closes around your nipple, his tongue flicking against the stiff peak. You gasp, and he feels a surge of satisfaction. His free hand squeezes your other breast, rolling the nipple between his thumb and forefinger. Your body arches into him, and your breathy sighs turn into moans.
He's intoxicated by the sounds you're making, by the way your body responds to his touch. He can’t get enough, and he sucks harder, teasing your nipple with his tongue. Your hands are gripping his shoulders, and your hips are bucking into his, searching for friction.
You're so sensitive, and his head is spinning. He doesn't know how long he spends teasing and torturing you, but it's not long enough. When he finally releases your breast with a pop, you're panting, and your skin is flushed.
“Armor off,” you growl, and he chuckles.
"Yes, sir," he says, unable to hide the amusement in his voice. He reaches down and tugs at his boot, and you slide down the wall. The look in your eyes makes him shiver.
"I'm not your General anymore."
"No, but I'm still your loyal soldier," he says. It’s meant to be a joke, but it comes out more serious than he intended.
You smirk, and the expression sends a jolt of heat straight to his cock.
"Then get to it, soldier."
He raises an eyebrow, and if he wasn’t so turned on, he might be embarrassed by how fast he rips off his remaining armor, his fingers fumbling at the clasps. When he's finished, you're grinning, and his heart skips a beat. He whips the top half of his blacks off, tossing it onto the floor, and before he can register what's happening, you've wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him into a deep, passionate kiss.
The feeling of your bare chest against his sends a bolt of heat through him, and his hands find their way back to your waist, pulling you closer. You moan into his mouth, and his cock throbs.
He's so distracted by the feeling of your lips and tongue and hands that he barely registers the tugging on his waistband. Not until his blacks are sliding down his hips, exposing his hard length to the cool air of the room.
"Kriff," he hisses, breaking the kiss. "You're gonna be the death of me."
"Hopefully not," you murmur, nipping his lower lip.
"Well, you're sure making it hard."
You look down, and your lips curl into a wicked grin. He feels his cock twitch, and a drop of precome beads at the tip.
"Hard?" you ask innocently.
He groans, leaning his head against yours. "You're awful."
"I know." You reach down and take his cock in your hand, stroking it gently. He can't help but moan. "But I think you like it."
"Kriff," he curses, biting back another groan. "I love it."
He closes his eyes, and your thumb brushes over the head, spreading the slickness around. His breath hitches, and he can feel the pleasure coiling low in his belly. You're so good at this, and he's already so close, and when you sink to your knees and look up at him through those long lashes, his brain short-circuits.
You grip his cock firmly, and he sucks in a sharp breath, bracing his forearm against the wall. You lean in, and your lips brush against his stomach, kissing the soft skin just below his navel. He trembles.
"Relax," you whisper, pressing another kiss to his abdomen.
“Fuck," he groans. "Don't tell me to relax."
He's so wound up, so on edge, his whole body is tingling. Your tongue darts out, and you lick a hot stripe up his cock, and his hips buck involuntarily. You smile, and his eyes flutter shut, his chest heaving.
Your mouth is warm and wet, and you wrap your lips around the head, swirling your tongue over the slit. His eyes squeeze shut, and his breathing grows ragged.
You begin to bob your head, slowly taking him deeper and deeper with each pass. When he hits the back of your throat, you hum, and his knees nearly give out.
"Fucking hell," Howzer moans, his voice cracking. His head falls forward, and his forehead rests against his forearm. His eyes are closed, and his mouth is open, and he's trying desperately to hold back the embarrassing sounds that threaten to escape.
You pull back, and the cold air against his saliva-slick cock makes him shiver. Your hand is still working him, pumping his shaft, and his balls tighten. He can feel his orgasm building, his whole body tensing, and it's too soon, much too soon, and he needs to slow down.
"Stop, stop, stop," he chants, pulling away from you. He's so close, so painfully close, and he can't stand the thought of finishing before he even gets inside you.
You pull away, looking up at him with confusion. "Why?"
"Because if you don't, I'm going to come," he manages, his voice hoarse.
You smile wickedly. "Is that so?"
"Yes."
"And what if I want you to?" You hum, your fingers teasing the tip of his cock. It’s the lightest touch, but it makes him jump. He closes his eyes, trying to compose himself. He's never been this close to losing control so fast, and he doesn't want to embarrass himself.
"Please," he begs, his voice a choked whisper. "Not like this. Not yet."
The teasing expression on your face melts into something softer, and you rise to your feet, wrapping your arms around his neck and kissing him. He tastes himself on your tongue, and it only turns him on more.
"Alright," you murmur against his lips, your breath hot. "How do you want me?"
He feels the question like a punch to the gut, and his mouth goes dry. "I—um—"
"Howzer," you say softly, nipping his bottom lip. "Don't make me order you."
His eyes fly open, and his cock twitches. The image of you ordering him around, telling him what to do, how to fuck you—
"Howzer."
He's so fucked.
"Bed," he says, his voice a low growl. "Now."
The corner of your mouth quirks, and you raise an eyebrow. "That's not an answer."
He swallows and reaches down, trailing his fingers along the seam of your trousers. Your eyes flutter shut, and a breathy sigh escapes your lips. He watches you, and he can see the way your chest is heaving, the flush that creeps down your neck. It gives him the confidence to continue.
"I want you to take these off," he breathes. “And I want you on your back.”
"Yes, sir," you say, a teasing smile on your lips.
His heart lurches. "Oh, now you listen to me."
"Maybe I like when you're in charge," you purr.
He can't help the groan that escapes him.
Your hands slide down his chest, and you walk away, turning your back to him as you loosen the ties to your trousers. You make a show of sliding them down your legs, bending at the waist, and he nearly chokes when your underwear slides off, too.
"Kriff," he mumbles, his eyes glued to your ass.
You straighten and toss him a coy look over your shoulder, and he's helpless, completely and utterly enraptured.
"Like what you see?"
"Always," he replies, his voice low.
He can't stop himself from reaching out, his hand running up the smooth skin of your thigh. But you dance out of his grasp, laughing.
"Not so fast," you tease.
He growls, a sound that rumbles in his chest. "Don't be a tease."
"What's the matter, Captain?" you ask, stepping towards the bed. "Getting impatient?"
Howzer lets out a laugh of disbelief. He's beyond frustrated, he's already the most desperate he's ever been. Usually he’d play along with your games, but right now, he needs you, and he can't stand the thought of waiting another minute.
"Yes," he says, his voice rough. "Now get on the fucking bed."
You raise an eyebrow, a small smile playing at the corners of your lips. "Yes, sir."
You move, and in one fluid motion, you're laying down on the bed. You spread your legs, inviting him, and he nearly passes out. You look like every fantasy he's ever had, laid out for him, waiting for him.
"Like this?"
"Yes," he groans, his voice cracking.
"Come here, then," you say, your tone seductive.
He can see how wet you are, how ready you are for him. It makes his head spin, his heart race. He wants to taste you, to bury his face between your legs. But the ache in his cock is too strong, the need to feel you overwhelming. He has to take a deep breath before he approaches, afraid his legs won't work.
"What are you waiting for?" you ask.
"Just...taking in the view,” he replies, his voice low and rough. He tries to meet your eyes, but he can't stop staring at the apex of your thighs, at your glistening pussy, begging for him.
You giggle, a sound he's never heard from you before, and he decides right then and there that it's his new favorite sound.
"So poetic," you tease.
"I can be," he retorts, trying to play along even though all his blood is currently rushing south.
"Come on," you say. "Don't make me wait any longer."
He's never been able to deny you.
Howzer steps forward, and before you can register his movements, he's kneeling on the bed between your legs, his hands gripping your thighs. He's not gentle as he pushes them further apart, baring you to him.
"Oh," you gasp.
He smirks, and his eyes rake over your body as he settles himself between your legs. He takes a moment to memorize the sight of you, your hair splayed out on the pillow, your flushed skin, the way your chest rises and falls with every breath.
"Fuck," he mutters, his voice barely a whisper. "I'm going to enjoy this."
"Please," you whimper, your hips bucking. The sound of it wakes him from his stupor, and he grips your thighs tighter, his thumbs pressing into the sensitive flesh.
"What was that?"
You bite your lip and look away, but he can see the heat in your cheeks, the way your breathing is heavy.
"I said please," you repeat, turning your gaze back to him.
His smirk widens. "I couldn't quite hear you," he teases, his fingertips grazing the outside of your folds. He can feel how wet you are, how hot, and it makes his head spin.
You whine, and your hips buck against his hand. "Please, Howzer."
The sound of his name on your lips is like music, and he can't resist any longer.
Howzer leans down and presses a hot, wet kiss to your inner thigh. You gasp, and he sucks a mark into the skin, his tongue flicking out to soothe the sting. He repeats the process on the other leg, leaving a matching mark, and your body writhes beneath him. He pulls back, admiring his handiwork.
"You look good like this," he says, his voice a low rumble.
"You're a menace," you huff.
He chuckles and runs a finger along the length of your folds, gathering the slick that's pooled there. "That's not a very nice thing to say."
"You're not being very ni—ah!" Your words turn into a gasp when he dips his head, his tongue dragging through your folds, the taste of you coating his tongue. He feels you tremble, and your hand tangles in his hair. He loves the way you grip him, and the soft sound of his name spurs him on.
Howzer moves to your clit, his tongue circling the sensitive bundle of nerves. Your hips arch off the bed, and he has to use his forearm to keep you down, his hand splayed across your stomach. He slides two fingers inside you, curling them and rubbing the spot he knows will make you moan.
He's rewarded by the sound of his name, your breathy cries filling the room. He works you hard and fast, his tongue and fingers relentless. You're soaking wet, and he can't believe how hot and tight you are around his fingers.
"I've dreamed of this," he growls, his lips brushing against your clit.
"Really?"
He nods, and the movement causes his stubble to scrape against your skin. "Mhm. Ever since we first met.”
You let out a laugh, but it quickly turns into a moan when his fingers hit the right spot. "I-is that so?"
"Yes," he says, curling his fingers and pressing hard. "All those years fighting beside you, and I could barely control myself. It was torture."
You keen, your pussy clenching around his fingers, and he can't help but chuckle.
"I used to think about all the things I'd do if I ever got the chance."
"I thought about it too," you pant.
He looks up, surprised. The motions of his hand stutter, but he regains his composure, picking up the pace and making you gasp. "You did?"
You nod, and he watches your face, your eyes closed, your brows furrowed.
"What did you think about?"
"This," you breathe. "How you'd feel, how you'd taste, how you'd make me come."
The admission sends a jolt through him, and he moans against your clit, the vibrations making you writhe. He doubles his efforts, and his tongue draws patterns across your sensitive flesh. Your thighs tense around his head, and he feels the way you tighten around his fingers.
"I thought about you fucking me," you continue, and his eyes flutter shut. "About you filling me up and making me scream."
He can't help the noise he makes, a low, desperate groan. His cock throbs, aching for relief, and he knows he can't wait much longer. He needs you to come, needs to feel you come undone beneath him.
He can feel you getting closer, the way your breathing gets shallower, the way your muscles begin to tense. You're panting his name, and your hips are rolling, and he can tell you're close, so close.
“I’ll do whatever you want, sweetheart," he growls, the words muffled against your skin. "Just let go. Come for me."
The pet name seems to do the trick, and a string of curses spills from your lips as your body convulses, your cunt clenching and spasming around his fingers. Your hands grip his hair, tugging painfully at the roots, and he can't find it in himself to care. He keeps pumping, drawing out your orgasm until you're writhing, begging for mercy.
When you're finally spent, he pulls back, resting his cheek on your inner thigh. He can't stop looking at you, can't stop drinking in the sight of you, flushed and satisfied. You're the most beautiful thing he's ever seen, and his chest feels so full, so complete.
"Well?" he asks.
"What?"
"Was it everything you imagined?"
Your face breaks into a smile, and you shake your head, laughing. "It was better."
"Good," he says, kissing the inside of your thigh. He slowly withdraws his fingers, and his lips find your clit again, sucking gently and licking up the fresh wave of slick.
You moan, and your hands fall from his hair to the sheets, clutching at them. He can't get enough, can't stop tasting you. He could spend hours between your thighs, and it wouldn't be enough.
"Howzer," you sigh.
"You taste good," he mumbles, not bothering to pull his lips away from your cunt.
"Come here," you plead. "I want you."
"I am here."
"No," you laugh. "I want you inside me."
"Is that an order?" he asks, teasingly.
"It is," you reply.
"Then I better follow it."
Howzer is on top of you in an instant, his lips finding yours. You moan at the taste of yourself on his tongue, and he groans, his hips bucking against yours. His cock is pressed against your slit, and you're so wet, and it would be so easy to slip inside. He can't stand the thought of waiting any longer.
He reaches between your bodies, and you feel him lining up, the blunt head of his cock teasing your entrance. He pulls back, breaking the kiss and resting his forehead against yours.
"Ready?" he asks.
"Always."
The word fills his heart with warmth, and he can't stop the smile that spreads across his face.
He's still smiling when he pushes inside, and his grin only grows wider at the feeling of your tight, wet heat around him. He has to fight the urge to come right then and there, and his hands grip your hips hard enough to bruise.
"Kriff," he gasps.
"Don't stop," you pant, your eyes screwed shut.
"Wouldn't dream of it."
He thrusts in deeper, sinking another inch, and the noise that escapes your lips is the hottest thing he's ever heard. He does it again, and again, and before he knows it, he's fully sheathed inside you, his cock stretching you open, his hips flush against yours.
"Sweetheart," he breathes, the nickname coming out almost unbidden. "You feel so good."
Your hands are wrapped around his neck, and your eyes are screwed shut. Your brow is furrowed, and your mouth is hanging open, and he can't tear his eyes away.
"I—" he starts, but the words die in his throat. He can't find the right ones, can't articulate the depth of his feelings for you. So instead, he presses a soft kiss to your forehead, and then another, to the tip of your nose.
You look up at him, and the expression in your eyes is so tender, so full of affection, that his heart skips a beat.
"I love you," he whispers, the words escaping him without thought.
"I love you, too."
His heart soars, and he can't help but lean down and kiss you, his lips crashing into yours. It's a messy, passionate kiss, full of heat and need and love. You cling to him, and he loses himself in the feeling of you, of your arms and legs and mouth. He sets a slow pace, his hips moving in shallow, lazy thrusts.
You break the kiss, gasping for air, and he takes the opportunity to hooks his hands underneath your knees, bringing them up and bending you in half.
"What—" you start, but your question is cut off by a moan as he thrusts deeper, the angle changing and his cock hitting that sweet spot inside you.
"Oh," you gasp.
"You like that?"
You nod, your eyes closing, and he grins. His movements are languid, and you're so wet, and it's the best thing he's ever felt, the feeling of your tight cunt wrapped around his cock.
"So do I," he says, leaning forward to press a kiss to the side of your knee. "Feels so good, sweetheart. So kriffing good."
"Howzer," you murmur, the word a sigh.
He hums in response, and the feeling of it vibrates through his chest, his mouth still pressed against your knee. You shiver.
"You feel amazing," he says, his voice low and husky. "I can't believe how good you feel."
"Howzer," you groan, your hips bucking, the movement causing him to slide in even deeper on each thrust. "Harder."
"You want me to fuck you harder?"
"Please," you beg, your voice a whine.
"Fuck," he swears. "Yes, sir."
He pulls back and sets a new, punishing pace. He can't stop the noises that escape him, and his balls slap against your ass as he fucks you, the sound obscene. He's so close, but he needs you to come again, needs to feel you squeeze his cock, hear his name fall from your lips as you climax.
"Look at me," he orders.
You do, and the sight of your eyes, wild and dark with desire, is almost enough to push him over the edge. But he holds back, determined to make you come.
He wedges a hand between your thighs, his thumb finding your clit and rubbing tight circles. Your breath catches, and your cunt clenches around him, the rhythmic tightening sending him spiraling closer to the edge.
"Come for me," he groans, and he can't believe he's begging, but he is, and he doesn't care. "Please, sweetheart, come for me."
The pressure of his fingers and the sound of his voice are enough, and you shudder, crying out his name as your cunt spasms around him.
It's too much. He's been on edge for so long, and it's impossible to resist any longer. Before he can stop himself, he's coming, his hips stuttering as he spills inside you, his cock pulsing as his balls empty themselves, coating your walls. He can feel his release dripping out, leaking down his shaft, and the thought of it is so filthy, so hot, that he nearly blacks out.
"Fuck," he gasps, his head falling forward. He's shaking, his body wracked with the force of his release. It feels like every single nerve in his body is on fire, and his vision is blurred, and the only thing keeping him tethered to reality is the feeling of your hands in his hair, gently massaging his scalp.
When his body finally stops trembling, he opens his eyes, and you're looking up at him, a smile playing on your lips.
"Hi," you say softly.
"Hey," he replies, his voice hoarse. He looks down and sees the mess between your thighs, his cock and your folds coated in his release. He groans. "Sorry, I—I should have asked if you were okay with that."
"It's fine," you reassure him, your hand stroking his hair. "It was good. Really good."
"I'll pull out," he mumbles, leaning down and kissing you.
"Wait," you say, and the sound is muffled against his lips. "Not yet."
"Okay," he whispers, pulling back.
"I just want to feel you for a little longer."
The words make his heart ache, and he leans down to capture your lips in another kiss, softer this time. Your legs fall from his shoulders, and they wrap around his waist, keeping him close.
"How's that?" he asks, his voice barely a whisper.
"Perfect," you murmur, running your hands down his back.
He presses his forehead against yours, and he closes his eyes, focusing on the feeling of you. The two of you stay like that for a few moments, neither of you wanting to move.
Finally, he pulls away, and the soft, disappointed noise you make sends a jolt through him.
"It's alright, sweetheart," he soothes. "Just trying to find something to clean us up."
You groan and bury your face in the pillow, and the sight is so endearing, he can't help but lean down and kiss the corner of your mouth.
"I'll be right back," he says, reluctantly untangling himself from your limbs.
"Fine," you huff, and the pout on your lips is adorable.
He climbs off the bed and walks to the 'fresher, and when he returns, you're propped up on one elbow, watching him. Your gaze is focused on his softening cock, and his cheeks heat up.
"Like what you see?" he asks, echoing your words from earlier.
You raise an eyebrow and smirk. "Always."
The blush deepens, and he clears his throat. He makes his way back to the bed, and he cleans up the mess that's leaking out of you, wiping up his spend. When he's finished cleaning both of you, he tosses the cloth to the floor and climbs into the bed, pulling the blankets up and tucking the two of you in.
"That's better," you sigh, curling up next to him.
Howzer wraps his arm around your shoulder, and you nestle into the crook of his arm. He rests his cheek on the top of your head, and the two of you lie in silence, enjoying each other's presence.
"I love you," you say softly, after a few minutes.
"I love you, too."
Your hand rests on his chest, and your fingers trace the planes of his muscles. He shivers, and he can't suppress the grin that spreads across his face. He feels like his heart might burst.
"So," you say, after a while. "How long have you been holding onto that?"
He snorts, and his arm tightens around you. "How long ago was that day on Kamino?"
"What?" you ask, surprise evident in your voice. You sit up and look at him, and he's pleased to see the blush that stains your cheeks. "You're kidding."
He shakes his head, his gaze fixed on the ceiling. "Nope. That's when I knew."
"Howzer!"
"What?"
"That was...that was ages ago," you stammer, and the way you can't seem to get your words out makes him chuckle.
"Yeah, well," he shrugs. "What can I say? I'm a romantic."
"Well, I'm sorry it took me so long," you murmur, laying your head back on his chest.
"It's alright," he says, his hand finding yours and lacing his fingers through yours. "You're worth the wait."
"So are you."
He closes his eyes and presses a kiss to the top of your head. He can feel his eyelids getting heavy, and the weight of your body is comforting. The steady rhythm of your breathing is soothing, and before long, his consciousness begins to slip away.
The last thing he hears is the sound of your voice, sleepy and content.
"I love you, Howzer."
"I love you, too, sweetheart."
He drifts off to sleep, and the last thing he feels is the press of your lips against his chest, just above his heart.
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@heidnspeak @lovelytech9902 @frozenreptile @chocolatewastelandtriumph @etod
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I loooove your tbb fics! Can I pretty please request a pervy tech fic? Like anywhere between a bit awkward kinda pervy to full weirdo :))
Word Count: 6.4k Pairing: tech x fem!reader Warnings: voyeurism, piv, creampie, panty fetish, peeping tom, exhibitionism, breeding kink Summary: Tech discovers a night time hobby of yours, one he doesn't realize is solely for him ps: imperfect proofreading
As your neighbor, Tech was aware of some of your avenues for relaxing. Your patio was often strewn with evidence of projects and hobbies- an underused hammock full of blankets and books, altered clothing strung up to dry, tubes of paint, and even a few tools from when you swindled Tech into teaching you how to repair your comm devices. Hobbies that, as seen by your failure to repair said devices, were often unfruitful.
It wasn’t uncommon for you to show up unannounced to the Batch’s home with a dinner invitation. Each time you’d have a feast prepared big enough to feed a family of Wreckers. Tech learned those were the worst weeks for you.
Some of your other outlets were less obvious, and by all means too private, for most to notice. Then again, most didn’t have a direct view into your bedroom. A view you often left unguarded and on full display.
Tech couldn’t blame you for not realizing your vulnerabilities. Afterall, his sight line was little more than a sliver. More than enough to witness you and your more nocturnal hobbies.
The first time he witnessed you was by chance while calibrating his visor. Its sensors picked up on movement coming from the direction of your home. There was a small bit of light coming from your bedroom, but everything was still - you weren’t even in sight.
Until you walked by your window in a robe. You walked to your bedside, just at the periphery of his view, and began digging through your night stand. With your back to him, you straightened out, tossed whatever item you found on the bed, and dropped your robe.
You wore only panties.
Up to that point, Tech only ever saw a naked female human through the screen of his datapad. Between battle and traveling with his brothers, he’d hardly even been alone with a female.
Tech rushed to his window, zooming in enough to see the freckles of your back. In person and in motion - you were breathtaking.
When you revealed your front Tech nearly passed out. An ache bloomed in his pants so suddenly, his hand slipped over his crotch. He’d applied pressure to ease the ache and unintentionally replaced it with pleasure.
As you climbed into bed, Tech noted every bit of you that jiggled and the shadows that accentuated your curves and committed them all to memory. After cozying into your bed, you licked your fingers in a way that dried Tech’s mouth. Your fingers slipped into your panties and began rubbing circles beneath the fabric.
The noises that followed were lewd, low, and put a rhythm in Tech’s hand. From outside of his pants, Tech worked himself in time with the lazy circle of your hands. Your hips gyrated, head arched into your pillow, and your free hand found a nipple.
That night Tech didn’t get to find out what exactly it was you’d brandished from your night stand. He didn’t realize how close he’d edged until you pinched yourself and curled forward on a moan. The sound of you shuddered through him and pushed him into ecstasy without even taking himself out of his pants.
Instantly, Tech receded into his room feeling more exposed than you actually were. Panting, Tech fell onto his bed and plucked his helmet off. He twisted it to face him and, as he expected, found it wasn’t recording. A mistake he wouldn’t make twice.
Then again, Tech reasoned it was most likely something he wouldn’t see twice.
The whole experience made bumping into you the next day all the more jarring. He’d been too lost in his datapad to notice Hunter was no longer leading him through the busy street. Hunter stepped off the path to tend to Omega and only a few steps later you and Tech collided.
You’d been equally as distracted, landing you both on the ground with you sprawled out over Tech. He lay beneath you, stunned and overtly aware of how you teetered over his leg. The sweet spot between your legs was pressed tight against his thigh.
Tech wanted to grip your hips and roll you against him just to hear the sounds you made the night before up close. He settled for sitting forward and letting gravity slide you against him.
Embarrassed, you steadied yourself by his shoulders, laughing, “Bet you wish you had your armor on now.”
“It crossed my mind.” He said, though he was sure your intentions for the armor differed from his. It was going to be difficult to hide the amount of blood rushing to his groin - an issue a well placed codpiece would have nullified.
His urgency to get the both of you back up grew with the ache in his cock. Pulling you against him, he used his military finesse to haul you upright. Taking advantage of the situation, and a risky gamble along with it, he held you against him as he lowered you to your feet. Your pelvis and abdomen brushed his groin and he could only hope you didn’t notice anything else.
“Are you alright?” He angled his head around you, trying to spot any bumps or scrapes.
Your hands slipped from his shoulders, resting on his chest with a light pat. “Perfectly alright.” After another few moments of standing in his arms, you craned your head back with a coy smile. “Tech?”
His name in your mouth turned his insides liquid, rendering his usual composure less certain.. “Yes?”
“You can let go now.”
The firm grip he had on your ass fully registered and in an instant his hands were in the air. He didn’t blurt out an apology, it was an innocent mistake - or at least he knew he could pass it off as one. One that, now that he got a feel of you, he fully intended to make again.
Hunter and Omega walked up beside the two of you, further breaking Tech’s focus. Looking between you, Hunter smirked, “You two take a tumble?”
You kept Tech’s eyes a moment longer, then shifted a pleasant smile on Hunter and Omega, “Just me being clumsy.”
“Hunter,” Omega pulled at Hunter’s arm, turning an excited eye on you, “Can she come tonight?” That caught your full attention, you invited them over far more often than was reciprocated.
“That’s up to her,” Hunter replied, eyes still twinkling with mild amusement at the earlier scene.
Glancing at Tech for some cluing in and getting nothing, you amusedly asked, “And what would that be?”
Omega bounced in place, excitedly telling you about a game night Shep and Lyanna had planned. While it sounded like a lovely time, you had to turn her down.
You crouched to Omega’s eye level, “Thanks Omega, but I have a quiet night in planned.” With a reassuring squeeze of her shoulder, you promised, “Next time though.”
Tech had fully planned on participating in the game night, and was even looking forward to being the ultimate victor, but his plans changed the moment he heard yours. That night, Omega tried her best to convince her brother to follow through yet he remained firm.
He excused himself from a night out under the guise of needing to address a technical malfunction in the home, a pretext no one had questioned given his usual dedication. Yet, there he was, not soldering wires or calibrating sensors, but dimming the lights of his domicile to feign vacancy.
You were under the impression the Batch wouldn’t be home and Tech intended to keep it that way. If you risked discovery while they were home, he was desperate to find out what you’d do with more privacy.
Before that he needed to learn what was in your nightstand and only had a limited window of opportunity to do so. Where you were, he wasn’t certain, but Omega, Hunter, and Wrecker left for Shep’s and your lights were out. Just enough cover for him to get in through your window.
He stood near your bed, clenching his fists as the vision of you contorting flashed through him. Pushing through the temptation of the memory, he pivoted to the nightstand only to pause when he felt something beneath his foot.
Tech stepped back, knelt, and plucked up a pair of familiar underwear. The same as you’d worn the night before. The material was thin, soft, and slightly damp. He’d done enough follow up reading last night to know why.
He was about to examine them closer when the sudden sound of your front door sliding open jolted him back to reality. On instinct, he ducked low, slipping out the window just in time to avoid being caught. Outside, Tech hid in the shadows, his breath shallow as he peered past your curtains. He still had, unintentionally, your garments in hand.
You came into your room faster than he’d expected, flipping on the light and immediately shedding your outerwear. Mindlessly, Tech rubbed the pair he had between his thumb and forefinger as he watched you leave a trail of clothing until only panties left.
Padding over to your bedside, you leaned over your nightstand, giving Tech a full view of the thin strip of fabric between your legs. Without thought, Tech brought your panties to his face and took in the scent of you, wishing he was experiencing it firsthand.
When you turned, he had to slide back an inch just to avoid your eyes. Just as he’d done, you paused at your nightstand. Something was off to you. The realization dawned slowly, and your movements stilled entirely when you noticed the absence of your underwear on the floor.
As you turned slightly, looking out the window with suspicion, Tech held his breath. He felt a rush of anxiety as you slowly drew closer, until your suspicion gave way to a smile. You held a little device in your hand Tech didn’t recognize even as you sauntered over.
Your focus was beyond him on the empty home next door. And by Tech’s calculations you were looking directly at his room.
You stood in a blind spot for Tech. He had to retreat far enough that he couldn’t see anything but your silhouette in the light. Tech watched your shadow hold onto the window frame, heard a sudden buzzing, and ached as you touched the device to your body.
On contact your entire body flinched from anything but pain. He slowly lowered your underwear to his lap. The sinful sounds coming from you puppeted Tech into carefully undoing his pants to expose himself.
With your panties in hand, Tech gripped himself as he continued to watch your shadows move with your escalating noises. In a way, he felt close to you beyond his proximity. He glanced down at the soft fabric smoothing over his cock, remembering why they were damp and how you’d looked pleasuring yourself.
Looking back to your shadow, he nipped every urge to reveal himself. He knew nothing about approaching this situation or how he’d convince you into partnering with him. And though he knew he wouldn’t resort to it, he did contemplate begging.
You’d been fantasizing about Tech since his squad first arrived and, although he seemed to show little interest in you, you kept a keen eye on him. You’d noticed your underwear weren’t where you thought you left them. As opposed to concern, a desperate idea clouded you.
What if he finally spotted you?
For some time you’d been on an exhibitionist streak, willing Tech to just look your way. You knew it was a long shot and it still heated your blood. Perhaps curiosity had gotten the better of him.
Your grip on the window frame was the only thing keeping you on your feet as you notched up the setting on your vibrator. You were too wrapped up in a fantasy of Tech’s hand at your clit to keep your eyes open until the fantasy positioned him behind you.
Just the idea of him penetrating you took you to the cusp of release and tossed you over. As the heat in your coil boiled over, you curled forward, barely staying up right and moaning loud enough that, had he been home, Tech would’ve definitely heard you.
A plea to the vision of Tech spilled from you, “Oh, right there, yes! I’m cumming for you, Tech.”
In normal conversation, your saying his name distracted him. Calling to him, pleading for him, instantly ruined his composure and his orgasm quickly followed yours. He came into your panties, working hard to keep his breathing quiet despite the ecstasy fogging him.
Exhausted, you slumped onto the window pane. You leaned back, eyes drooped shut and a lazy smile lilting your lips. On a sigh, you shrugged and shoved off. As Tech began tucking himself away, he leaned around the window in hopes to catch one last glimpse of you.
Just in time, he caught the tail end of you stripping your underwear off, leaving them where they fell, and walking out of your room.
Tech did a quick risk analysis, weighed his options, and quickly reached over the threshold of your window. He snatched the garment from the floor and slipped into the night.
He returned well before his siblings returned, careful to keep the lights dim as to not raise your suspicions beyond what they already were. Tech couldn’t help himself from checking on your movements, disappointed to find you clothed and casual, eager to relive the moment you called for him.
It became a game for Tech, one of piecing together the patterns of your schedule to catch you alone
Weeks later, in the comfort of your home, Tech helped you repair some comm devices. One in particular, tied to your most incessant client, immediately came to life with an angry message of dissatisfaction and a new deadline.
Stress pushed you over the edge and unfortunately, now conveniently for him, in front of Tech. You almost threw the device against a wall, a knee jerk response that broke the device in the first place, but Tech intercepted it.
“If you’d like my continued assistance,” Tech scolded, setting the device on the table between you. “I’d advise against immediately rendering my repairs useless.”
You didn’t apologize, choosing rather to slump down in your chair with your head on the table. Mumbling into the wood grain you said, “I should’ve just asked you to do this tomorrow.”
Tech set about fixing the last device, sparing you a quick glance. “You can always reply to clients tomorrow.”
A long, low groan came from you as you pushed back into your chair. “Always tomorrow. There’s always something tomorrow.” Leaning with your elbows on the table, your head fell into your hands. “Even on a day off, I’m constantly stressed.”
Tech looked up from his repairs, twirling his spanner to point in your direction. “If you do not learn how to manage your stress, your cortisol levels will quickly become a detriment to you both physically and mentally.”
By the time Tech finished his nagging, your head rested in one hand and while your other strummed out an impatient rhythm. Fully irritated, you sassed back, “Tech, I’m beyond that point by now.”
“Then I suggest you focus on finding a suitable outlet.” Tech shrugged, lowering his visor and spinning his spanner back into position.
And, as your neighbor, Tech was already aware of some of your avenues for relaxing. Some that he was eager to encourage.
With the final repairs almost finished and seeing an opportunity to spend another evening in your company, Tech set aside his spanner and removed his helmet.
As he gathered his things, Tech said, “I think the rest can wait until tomorrow. You should get some rest.”
Almost on cue, Omega came through your front door, bounding over to where you and Tech sat.
Bouncing with energy she shook your arm excitedly. “Game night at Shep’s! You’ll come, won’t you?”
Your promise to Omega snuck up on you, having completely slipped your mind for weeks. Hating to disappoint her, but exhausted all the same, you massaged your temples and sighed.
“I’m sorry, Omega. I have a lot of work - not tonight.”
She immediately deflated, pouting. “Ahh, you work too much.” Narrowing a look at Tech she muttered, “Both of you. Tech’s been holed up most evenings too.”
A sneaking suspicion crept up your spine and, as if he felt it too, Tech stiffened. You’d always noticed that the home was rarely left with only one of the Batch and you’d never noticed Tech alone in the evenings - you knew because you always looked for him.
Lifting your head from your hands you smiled innocently at Tech, who was pointedly looking anywhere but at you. “I didn’t realize.” You mumbled.
“Why else would the lights be on when we’re out?”
You kept your eyes steady on Omega, unwilling to let her in on the growing secret between you and Tech. Those lights were rarely on at nights without someone inside.
You chose to roll your shoulders as lazy ‘I don’t know’ as opposed to answering, your eyes sliding to Tech who was busying himself to follow Omega out the door.
Omega gave you a poor, pitying look, gripping your shoulder as if to imbue you with strength. “You know where we are if you need a break.”
Humming, you barely heard her, too focused on thinking back on all the small sounds outside your window, misplaced items, and creeping feelings. The two clones were making their exit - Tech his escape - as you quickly slid from your chair and a comm device hidden in your palm.
Without permission, you lunged on Tech and slipped your arms around his torso. Under the guise of a thankful gesture, you tucked the device into one of his many pockets. It was only up to the Force if he’d notice.
You pulled back and held his upper arms for one last smile. “I appreciate everything, Tech,” you finished, keeping your smile warm but your eyes sharp, searching for any hint of reaction to the small device now concealed on him.
Tech paused, his body rigid under your touch for a moment before he managed a stiff nod. "Of course," he replied, his voice as neutral as the mask he often wore. But beneath that mask, you caught a fleeting glance of surprise, or perhaps suspicion.
As Tech turned to leave, his usual movements seemed slightly off, a subtle indication that your actions might have unsettled him. He made no sign of noticing the device, but you knew better than to assume anything with Tech.
The two left and you settled into planning your approach for the night. It was risky, bordering presumptuous, to assume Tech had been watching you all those nights. More than anything it was exciting. It was everything you’d been vying for.
Carefully, you monitored the Batch’s movements until Hunter, Wrecker, and Omega left for Shep’s. Different from other nights, the lights stayed on.
A smile hit you as you added another piece of evidence towards Tech being caught. The lights in the majority of the house were on, sans the lights in Tech’s room. The sensation of being watched, residual or otherwise, whispered to you again.
You kept your comm device close as you set your plan in motion. Dressed in your evening robe, you rested against your open windowsill. Mindful of maintaining a casual air, you attempted to relax into the space by letting the night air brush your skin. Deliberately, you lifted one leg to rest on the sill, allowing the fabric of your robe to drape away enticingly from your thighs.
The fantasy of exposing yourself to Tech versus the very real possibility almost choked your plans. Still, the temptation was too great and your fingers found their way between your thighs.
Pleasure dissolved any remaining apprehension as you fixed your eyes on Tech’s room. Was he watching right now? You always looked for the red glow of his goggles, its absence always the reminder that your imagination was likely getting away from you.
As your core warmed and the heat of your arousal bolstered you, you pulled your comm device to your face. On baited breath, you activated the device and, as if speaking too loudly would unravel your hopes, quietly said, “Tech.”
His name echoed as if the relay was nearby. You froze, attempting nonchalance as you repeated yourself. Once again there was an echo. One that was much closer than you anticipated.
Cautiously slow, you scoped the area outside your home all the way to Tech’s empty window. Your heart rate nearly burst your eardrums until Tech’s voice nearly stopped it altogether.
Tech cringed as he sighed, “I am to your left.”
You twisted sharply, finding Tech within reaching distance and shaking his head in his hand. Excitement trembled through you as he lifted his head to meet your eyes.
His expression was a delicate mix of dejection and frustration. “You slipped it on me when you hugged me, didn’t you?”
“You caught me.” You couldn’t hide the humor you found in your own words.
Not one to let things drag and ready to extradite himself from the situation, Tech got to his feet to excuse himself. All thoughts of escape vanished when his eyes inevitably fell to your lap. Your hand was no longer in the mix, but your robe remained open.
He only allowed himself a glance at your exposed sex before meeting your eyes again, now with a glint in them. Since discovering your nighttime habits, Tech planned for an array of your reactions should he be discovered. None of them involved outright glee.
You extended a hand to him, a silent request for assistance. Tech accepted, noting the hand he accepted had been the one between your legs. He assisted you to your feet, and when he tried to let go, you tightened your grip, holding him in place.
With a small step back, you gave another silent request - another he accepted.
Tech followed your lead, ducking in through the window and breaching the space he’d spent so long cataloging. In the moment though, his focus was only on you as he tried to gauge your thoughts.
You were smiling despite discovering him in such a compromising position. In fact, he noted, you were in a similarly compromising position and yet you carelessly floated past him. He turned with you, surprised to see you drawing your curtains.
“I thought you preferred them open.” He quipped.
You paused, your hands still on the curtains, and looked back over your shoulder with a coy smile. “Only if I think it’s you looking in,” you murmured, sending a shiver of delight through him.
Your response straightened his posture. It’d been a challenge, but Tech had long accepted that he was a part of your sexual fantasies. Being the keystone of those fantasies was never even a consideration for him.
Puzzled by his own oversight and with a pang of wounded pride, he asked, genuinely curious, “Might I ask when you discovered me?”
“Just now.” Your brevity and upbeat tone enticed Tech to follow you as you stepped past him. A shrug of your shoulders drifted your robe farther down your shoulders.
“It was always just me hoping, but-” you paused as you climbed onto your bed, the movement causing your robe to ride up just enough to tease Tech. You settled back against your pillows with a contented sigh and continued, "learning you’ve been sneaking around in the dark certainly aided my suspicions."
Feeling an ounce of shame, Tech’s shoulders fell slightly with his confidence but shored up immediately.
At some point, Tech had convinced himself that your exhibitionism, while mildly on display, was likely something not intended for a true audience. In fact, outside of his name on your lips in the throes of pleasure, he’d rarely received your sole attention.
Yet the more of your smile he saw the more sure he was that he’d been wrong about all of it. And, for once, Tech was thrilled to be wrong.
“Are you going to join me?” The soft question brought Tech back to the present, the foot you outstretched to him inviting to come closer. His brown eyes raked up the soft skin of your leg all the way to where you propped yourself against the pillows.
You swallowed, eyes wavering for a moment. “Unless this is too much.”
His lips perked into a subdued, cocky smile. You were a vision just for him. One more that became more unexpected with each breath. His fingers ached to explore every inch of your skin.
Tech took the final step onto your bed, smoothing his hand over your foot and up your shin as he moved in on you. “Oh, this is far from too much.”
As he climbed towards you, you settled further into your pillows, bracing yourself for Tech. “And I’d be remiss to not witness up close what I’ve studied from afar.”
Settling in close, Tech sat back on his feet, and adjusted his goggles as he took you in. Head tilted down, Tech looked up through his goggles as his free hand trailed up your inner thigh. When his fingers were inches from the apex of your thighs, his other hand quickly followed suit.
Each second Tech strung out between you only enflamed your urge to shove him back and find out exactly what he tasted like. But you patiently waited, feeling your mounting arousal beginning to leak out of you for the technician.
Tech leaned in, those brown eyes pinning you in place as his fingers pressed into you and spread your legs to accommodate him. The sudden rush of cool air over your wet folds made you realize just how eager you were for Tech.
It took only a second’s glance for Tech to realize the same. He kept his touch light on your legs as he sat back again, this time with you on full display for him. Tech removed his gloves, caught your eyes again and cocked his head to the side in amusement.
“I never realized patience was your strong suit.” The low, teasing tone of his voice set you on edge
On an aroused shudder, your knees made to squeeze together but Tech was quick to keep them apart. “It appears I spoke to soon.” He commented in the same amused tone. “Why don’t you show me what you’ve been so eager for me to see.”
Your hand was between your legs before his sentence was finished and his hand blocked yours before your could manage more than a light touch. In place of your touch, Tech’s fingers slid over your as he leaned across your lap.
His fingers, more calloused than you expected, pulled a whine from you as he gave you barely there swipes. While he teased you, he explored your night stand. “I hope you’re not being shy now,” He said as you heard drawer shut and he came back to your front.
Tech drifted close enough to consume your entire line of sight. As he spoke, Tech dipped two cool digits into you, coaxing you forward. His calm exterior cracked when he first moved his fingers in an exploratory curl.
He swallowed, eyes dipping to where his fingers disappeared inside you. Hesitation, unsureness, flashed through him. He cleared his throat, meeting your eyes and making another slow curl of his fingers, this time with more pressure.
“How does that feel?” His question, accented by a break in his voice, told you this was something new for him. Your response came in clenching around him, fueling his confidence.
On a rushed, hushed, breath you pleaded with the man, “Keep going.”
“I plan on it. But first,” Tech paused, placing a familiar object in your hand. “I’d like you to use this.”
A new wave of blood flushed through you as you followed suit. Maintaining eye contact, you switched the vibrator on, the sound hitching Tech’s breath. The feel of it, the shock it sent through you, rinsed the tension from his shoulders.
Only the hum of the toy hung in the inches between you. With every motion of his fingers, your breathing hastened. Tech adjusted his touch with your reactions, but when he saw a small smile come to you Tech knew he’d found something good.
Breathlessly, Tech choked out, “I’d say that feels good.”
He added pressure to his rhythm and your patience immediately wore out, tearing your resolution in half as you angled your lips up to his. The moan that came from him set something loose in you. The both of you moved in on the other, your hands barely fitting between your bodies.
His lips parted the moment your tongue brushed him. For a moment, his mouth stayed open and still, only his tongue twitching as he let yours roam over his until his lips closed around your tongue, gently sucking on the soft flesh.
The sensation melted you, giving Tech the chance to roll you onto your back. Tech fell with you and never broke the kiss. There was no hesitation remaining in Tech, only hunger and a desperation to hear your next noise.
A warm, mounting pressure inside you finally made you break away from Tech and toss the toy aside. Turning just enough to pull your lips from his you said, “Tech, I need you.”
Tech didn’t ease up on tasting you, laying kisses down your chin to the crook of your neck. Between kisses he responded, “You have me.” The hand you pushed against his groin had him rolling his weight against you on a moan.
“All of you,” You insisted.
Tech pulled back sharply, suddenly slowing the momentum between you. His eyes were wide, darting between yours. “You want-”
Your hands cut him short as they pulled in by his pants. “Yes.” The word was a demand.
In some shade of shock, Tech gently pushed himself off of you while easing his fingers from you. On a brave inhale, Tech’s hands took place of yours, freeing you to relax back. A flush singed his cheeks and tips of his ears while he kept his eyes down on the task at hand.
You watched while he freed himself, casually slipping out of your robe to bare all of yourself. When he was one motion away from doing the same, his eyes found you again. You felt it, the mutual anticipation for this very moment.
His eyes drifted over you, devouring the feeling of seeing you nude just for him. Tech’s eyes followed your hand as it moved to the bud between your legs. You rolled one finger over your clit and he met your gaze again.
“You are as breathtaking up close as I imagined.”
A swell of heat met your touch at his words. You were certain of it - this man was going to completely undo you.
He bumped his goggles into place with a knuckle, eyes falling to the small distance between you. “There is one problem.”
You leaned up slightly, confusion, and a drop of horror, coming over you. In a mix of impatience and worry you asked, "Like what?”
Tech bit his lip, finally revealing himself to you. “I don’t believe I’m going to fit,” he confessed.
It didn’t take you long to see why he’d think that. You’d fantasized plenty of times about this man, what he’d taste and feel like, and you’d imagined a dozen times what his cock would look like. You were far from disappointed.
He was long, the length of him extending beyond the hold he had on himself. His girth you hadn’t expected, but it did not disappoint. If he thought two of his fingers was what you could handle, his girth would certainly give him pause about your limit.
A sudden thought stilled you.
“Tech,” you ventured softly. “Is this your first time?” Your question didn’t soften him, but he did pass you a look that was hard to read.
“Is that a negative attribute?”
“No!” You pushed up onto an elbow. Careful not to break the heat between you, you asked, “You want this - you want me, right?”
Tech swept his hand over his cock, pumping himself in response. “Clearly.”
Slowly lowering yourself, you flashed a feline smile at him. “Then you’ll fit.” You stretched a hand out to him, wiggling your fingers in another invitation.
He let you guide him back over you, his expression softening as he caged you below him. You smoothed your hands up his arms to his shoulders, bracing yourself as you gyrated your hips in search of him.
Tech kept himself propped over you, holding your eyes as he brought the head of his cock to you. You both inhaled at the connection. There was no pause, no further reassurances needed, as he pushed past your threshold.
The noises you made mirrored his own as the flared edge of his glans spread you and his length speared you. As always, Tech was at least partially right- his size was more than you’d been prepared for.
It was a conscious effort to not clench around him and remain relaxed as he slid inside you.
When he could move no further, Tech loosed his breath and ducked his head. He observed the spot you were joined as he shallowly pulled out and thrust back in, deeper this time as if he was seeing just how much he could push.
A mesmerized look came over him as he kept that tempo of short, deep thrusts until you couldn’t hold back anymore. Weeks of anticipation and a wild need to fuck this man made you think you wouldn’t last long when you finally had him. How he pinpointed your sweet spot while fingering you added evidence to the thought.
The way he filled you, stretched you into ecstasy, proved you right.
Tilting your hips against him, you worked with Tech for longer, faster motions. Drawing closer, you caught him in a kiss that drove his cock deep against your womb. You moaned into the kiss, continuing to roll your hips against him while your clit ached for release.
Mumbling into the kiss you admitted, “Tech, I can’t take much more.”
Tech pulled back just enough to confidently say, “I assumed that was the point.”
Your admission didn’t inspire Tech to stop his work. He picked up his pace again, giving you long, slow thrusts as one hand extended beside you. Gliding his tongue over your lips, he tasted your mouth as you had his.
His tongue was trailing yours when he squeezed your between you and vibrating pleasure hit your core.
Gasping against him and splayed out on the bed in front of him, only able to arch against the pleasure coursing through you.
“T-Tech!” You called out in warning.
Tech grit his teeth against your scaling release. “Don’t hold back, I won’t either.” He’d been ready from the moment he felt the velvet of your insides.
Unwilling to miss the full view of your orgasm, Tech propped himself up to see you writhing, laid out before him. With one hand Tech positioned your hips towards him and with the other he kept your toy in place.
He had yet witnessed your eyes roll back as they did just then. He drove into you until an open mouthed smile bloomed over you and you convulsed around him. His eyes widened, but his pace didn’t slow.
“Are you?”
Wordlessly and avidly you nodded as your orgasm crashed through you. White hot bliss threw stars into your vision. Waves of pleasure broke what little of your composure remained, rendering you dazed and moaning.
It was too much for Tech. Euphoria he’d never experienced broke free inside him and throbbed through his cock. He’d barely been supporting himself on his knees and they all but gave out as he came inside you, spilling his seed against your womb.
Tech attempted to fuck you through his own release, but ended up seated deep inside you, stretching you with each throb of his cock.
Moments went by with only the two of you panting against each other. Your shaky hands wandered to his shoulders, your fingers curling up over his neck and into his, now slightly damp, hair.
His eyes fluttered shut as he nuzzled into your touch. “That was magnificent.” Tech sighed.
“Sorry it was so quick.” Your voice cracked as you spoke, still pleasantly raw from all of your noises.
Tech shrugged, eyes shut as he said matter of factly, “The end result is all that matters, I suppose.”
“End result is one way to put it.” You chuckled. A small, anxious part of you spoke up, “Tech.”
He blinked away some of his fog as he hummed in acknowledgment, “What is it?”
“I want to do this again,” you whispered up to him.
Tech rolled his hips into you in response, reminding you that he was still inside you and still more erect than you’d expect. “If we are to succeed, that would be the wisest course of action.”
Your brows furrowed, head pushing back into the pillows to search his face. “Succeed in what?”
“Impregnating you, of course.” Tech saw the realization hit you and his expression mirrored your own. “Is that not what sexual relations are ultimately intended for?”
You opened your mouth, but words didn’t come out, only a bubble of giggling. “Not always.”
A renewed flush heated Tech’s face as the misunderstanding dawned him. You’d rarely seen him embarrassed, but found it charming nonetheless.
In a gentle tease, you probed further, “Is that what you intended?”
“Well, I-” Tech uncharacteristically stammered. He gave a little cough, saying, “I didn’t mind the idea.”
“Of breeding me?” You clarified, bringing your legs around him.
Tech rolled his eyes, recognizing your attempts at instigation. “That is one way to put it.”
Teasing or not the idea of it, of Tech wanting that, stirred something in you. Locking him in with his legs you brought him in for another kiss. “Then we should probably go again.”
He huffed a laugh, conceding, “I would say you are correct.”
taglist: @bruh-myguy-what @jetii @baddest-batchers
I really appreciate that Tech doesn't fit in the trope of "scrawny nerd man is weak". I love that he's a huge nerd and an elite soldier.
I love scenes where his strength is shown like when he literally carries echo on his back up that ventilation shaft when they save him. Or when he peels back the freaking metal wall.
My favorite one has to be when he's bitching at Wrecker for dropping the ipsium and they're just like
Wrecker: You carry it then!
Tech: Fine! >:(
Then he just slings that huge container onto his back.
I cannot believe it didn't dawn on me before...
When Clone Force 99 is first introduced, they save Echo from imprisonment and experimentation on Skako Minor.
In the Bad Batch series finale, Echo saves Clone Force 99 (or what remains of it 💔) from imprisonment and experimentation on Tantiss.
The cavalry first saved Echo; now, he's saving the cavalry.
(If we want to take it one step further: in the series premiere, the cavalry returns to Kamino to save Omega. Now, in the series finale, Omega helps save them.)
Also, I find it rather poetic that, after years of Clone Force 99 being rejected and shunned by the regs, it's regs who agree to help free them from Tantiss.
This is it, my favourite fanfiction, we found it gang 🎉
Since you have decided to relocate to Pabu, Tech has compiled a list of things you should be...aware of.
3. Do not believe Wrecker’s claim that Pabu has a nude beach. 14. The Archium is only slightly haunted. 38. Hide all reflective objects during moon-yo mating season.