──     you Hold Onto What You Have; You Do Not Give It Up Easily, Even When You Know It Is Poisoning

Give me a reason why you DON'T rp with me.

This isn’t an invitation to send hate. Please be courteous and kind when answering this meme.

"But the truth is, Kogami, it's not about whether you drag us down. It's about whether you even care enough to try pulling yourself up."

kogami getting cooked on the dashboard first thing in the morning

❛ you’ve broken me. all i can think about is you. ❜ (sugimoto at ogata)

a piece of you for every piece of me.

pain is what he feels first. like the first intake of breath at birth. second comes remembrance, the recollection of moments fluttering in repetition: the arrow, razor-sharp cuts on his face, the vacancy, sugimoto’s voice calling his name and grounding him to reality, to life. ogata’s chests heaves in a desperate attempt at regaining full consciousness and control of his body, limbs gone weak with misuse and the feverish haze blurring every corner keeps him nauseous enough to remain pressed to the makeshift bed.

his throat goes dry, voice rasp and low like sandpaper. “enough.” is all ogata manages to say.

there’s something… something odd in the words that made ogata’s hair stand on end. he’d felt this general unease before: bile accumulating in his mouth, the chill of a ghost in-passing, crawling through their feet. 

they’d faced the ruthless winter in Hokkaido, storms that devoured everything that crossed their path. rampaging wolves, ravenous, a wounded beast with a mouth covered in fangs. sugimoto isn’t so different from it. he’d sunk his teeth deep into flesh, rip apart anything that made him hungry enough, and in that manner, ogata could find a strange affinity for whatever this static was, between them. but anything beyond that mirroring ambition — for the gold, or the appetite for destruction —, turned every passing second into a reminder that he should’ve killed him, that he should’ve made sure that sugimoto wouldn’t come back and root himself in the back of his mind.

the warmth of sugimoto’s body half-pressed against him floods him with unnerving, pristine clarity: their proximity, the way silence seems so loud and piercing when all he can hear is the pounding in his head, sweat gone cold. 

he can smell sugimoto, the scent of blood and deer innards, the scent of a monster, the same as he is.

not this, what he’s pretending to be, what he’s pretending they can be as though the mere hint of normalcy can strip away every sin that keeps him awake and haunted. 

the asymmetry of sugimoto’s scar comes into clear view, air gone thick and heavy; ogata’s hand moves by reflex, wrenching sugimoto’s jaw away from his face, gaining him the opposite effect: sugimoto is wide awake, eyes flashing gold in the dark, arm pinning down ogata with as much ceremony as taking down cattle.

ogata laughs, mirthless, head thrown back and eye rolling back to his skull, delirium and exhaustion ebbing at the dregs of his consciousness.

“i said enough. i don’t know what kind of game you think you’re playing, but creeping up on people in their sleep is foul play even for someone like you.”

words drag on sluggishly between rasps and morphine, what’s left of it in his system, weak. it’s not as threatened as it is pitiful, the mournful cry of a wounded animal. ogata attempts to focus his attention back on sugimoto’s scars, his amber eyes, the crease of his eyebrows drawn up in confusion. this is what he prefers, this is what he knows best. anger is easy, predictable. “we’re not in the trenches, i’m sure you can ask someone a little more lively to take care of your needs for you. unless this is the kind of thing you’re into.”

@lustraveil

stay out of trouble . (Gino @ Kogami!)

perhaps it’s the late hour making him charitable.

or maybe the common sentiment shared among enforcers - masaoka and kogami specifically, that gino ought to be kept on the sidelines of all that hides in the shadows. unlike their own hues, his can still be maintained, can strive for salvation. as for the rest of them, well, they’ve already become familiar with the robotic voice dialing central, the reply back unlocking the weapon’s potential to paralyzer, at the very least, and in the worst cases, at the darkest hour of their minds, there’s no other way out but having their guts rained on ther companions. gruesome, but that’s their reality, one that gino should never know.

smoke clouds the space between them, standing side by side, and it’s perhaps the familiar ambience, like how it’d been in the past, which sapped his ability to reason when reason was the wisest thing to do. and remain quiet, for certain.

‘ trouble is a broad word. ’ he swept a hand across the air, bracelet come to view, ‘ as far as i’m concerned, i’ve been navigating in trouble for a while now. ’

guess the joke didn’t land well, he thinks, catching a glimpse of gino’s face contorting in something akin to anger, disappointment, defiance all at once. and isn’t it a dangerous feat, that he’s able to come bare with his emotions in the blink of an eye? it’s a weakness in the eyes of a predator like kogami, someone who’s always on the hunt for something, a ghost, or a memory. for any other person, honesty is freedom. it’s a distraction to himself, to let his thoughts wander. he picks up where he left off, sensing the tension embroidered in the seconds that he let the pause drag on for too long, so he offers gino a smile, once their gazes are locked.

‘ i get what you mean. it’s not the first time you’ve mentioned it. not the first person, either. you’ll probably hate to hear it, but masaoka has been insistent about it, too, in his own way. ’ 

the more you chase after something, the further away from your own skin it drives you; it’s crossed his mind that whatever becomes of him, of his raw flesh and bones, it can’t be anything pretty. when he set on this path, he accepted whatever outcome resulted of it. doesn’t mean he won’t give anything less than a calculated performance, that he’s received the devil’s gesture and returned it in kind. 

how to tell gino this, and that, and every other thing that comes after? there, suspended in air, balconies away from the other offices, it feels almost as if they were standing at the edge of the world. kogami’s gaze drops momentarily, welcoming the vertigo. he feels the treacherous birth of a smile, mirthless, and whether it’s the will of the fall - primal desperation, or the absurdity of this, bitter flavor of vengeance, he isn’t sure. but he wanted to say it no matter what.

gino deserved that much.

‘ you’re asking too much of me. i can’t give this up, you’ve known it for a long time. but i can promise you this: when the time to take the leap comes, i won’t drag you down - you, or inspector tsunemori or masaoka; you name it. think me a fool, if that’ll give you peace. curse me all you want, i’ll accept it. ’ if this hunger will be the death of me, then so be it. @lustraveil

from Psycho-Pass/Zero novel (source)

@limel1ghts

Xia Fei and Liu Xiao watching that fuckass movie

while re-reading Tokyo ghoul manga to wipe dust off my yomo muse I remembered how much I loved this series 😭😭 honestly miss writing Tsukiyama too... That was forever ago, so I'm not sure if his muse is still alive but we'll see.

be careful who you call friends... or your cousin that looks like he was your twin...

@12reset