I Love When People Are Like “Oh My God, I Couldn’t Possibly Imagine Being Asexual, How Sad, You’re

i love when people are like “Oh my god, I couldn’t possibly imagine being asexual, how sad, you’re missing so much…” Bitch!!! You know what’s sad? Being gluten intolerant. If you placed two pills in front of me right now, one which would turn me allosexual and one which would enable me to tear into a freshly-baked oven-warm olive-and-rosemary ciabatta without utterly destroying my body, it would not even be a choice. “hyuhhh-duhhhh aren’t you worried you’ll die alone” aren’t you worried i’ll just launch myself over the bakery counter in our local grocery store one day and stuff croissants in my mouth like a starving racoon til i die and the whole place has to be closed down as a health risk while they peel my bloated body off the linoleum floor? You should be

More Posts from Elssecondaccount and Others

1 month ago
I'll Just Leave It Here...

I'll just leave it here...

5 months ago

Everybody stop what you’re doing RIGHT NOW and celebrate the last Out of Touch Thursday of 2020

1 month ago

peeling those sour rainbow gummy strips into long thin strings and putting them into cheap energy drink to create something im calling battery acid spaghetti will update once ive finished it

3 months ago

ITS MARCH YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

ITS MARCH YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS
1 month ago

i hope whoever actually shot that CEO is having a good day.

2 months ago

Reblog this to ease the back pain of the person you reblogged it from

10 months ago

my friends r so talented. rb if ur friends are talented

2 months ago

In honor of the Ides of March, my favorite Tiktok

1 month ago

Imagine if they find Luigi innocent and he has to go through the rest of his life as That Guy Who Got Turbodoxxed That One Time Because Everyone Thought He Was An Assassin.

7 months ago

Apparently it's time to start posting and reblogging How to Tumblr stuff again. Lots of people are hopping from Twitter to Bluesky. A big thing to emphasize is that "repost" is the term bsky uses for "retweet", and we need to educate on the difference between "repost" and "reblog" here on Tumblr. We have so many things saying "don't repost things!" and that might cause confusion now that bsky has entered the game. I'd hate to see people avoiding Tumblr because they got yelled at for something they didn't do, because lingo is different.

I'll start: on Tumblr, "reblog" is sharing the original post on your blog for your followers to see. "Repost" is creating a new post with something you saved or downloaded or screenshoted from someone else's blog, and that's highly discouraged here. Please reblog to share the original so the creator can get the interactions too.

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elssecondaccount - Actually The First Account
Actually The First Account

I named it this on a dare, my real second account hasn’t been used in years and has a completely normal name.

348 posts

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