They Canonically Said Wilson Is Great In Bed I Can't Fucking Take It Anymore.

Anonymous: Did you ever go back to the Salt and Pepper diner?

Fresh Strawberry and Cream Cheese Danish

INGREDIENTS:

2 sheet Puff Pastry dough, thawed

8 ounces Cream Cheese, softened

1 tsp Vanilla Extract

½ tsp Almond Extract

4 Tbsp Sugar

1 ½ cup Fresh Strawberries, sliced

1 Tbsp Cornstarch

1 Egg + 2 Tablespoons water, whisked for egg wash

DIRECTIONS:

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper or a silicone baking sheet.

In a small bowl, mix together the strawberries and corn starch. Set aside.

On a lightly floured surface roll out thawed puff pastry into a 12×9″ rectangle. Cut in half lengthwise, yielding 2 4-½” strips. Cut those two strips crosswise into thirds, to yield six 4×4 ½” pieces.With a knife, score ½” border around the edge of each piece of puff pastry. Use a fork to make five or six pricks into the dough within the border of each piece. This will help keep the middle of each piece from rising.

In a bowl, stir together softened cream cheese, sugar, and vanilla and almond. Spoon about 2-3 tablespoons of mixture into the middle of each piece of dough and spread around evenly, ensuring the mix stays within the borders.

In the middle of the cream cheese, add a couple of spoonfuls of strawberries into the middle.

Bake for 18-20 minutes, on the middle rack and rotate the baking sheet half way through baking. Remove from baking sheet and cool on a wire rack. Serve warm or room temperature. Sprinkle with powdered sugar before serving. Shave chocolate over the top as well, if desired.

Blueberry picking

I found it. The legendary post.

BELTANE STRAWBERRY LEMON PASSION BARS

Hello my loves! Beltane is almost here, so I started to experiment with new recipes. This one, I have been messing around in the kitchen to get it right for 2 weeks now.

Beltane often includes aphrodisiacs and other romantic foods.  So why not some sweet strawberry lemon bars that represent love and passion?

FOR THE CRUST

2 ½ cups all-purpose flour

1 ½ cup butter, softened

1 cup powdered sugar

FOR THE FILLING

1 cup sugar

2 tsp. grated lemon peel

The juice of 1 lemon 

½ cups strawberries

A pinch of salt

4 large eggs

3 tbsp honey

Directions

Butter a square baking pan, and line the bottom and sides of the pan with parchment paper. This will prevent the bars from sticking to the pan.

Make the crust by creaming the butter, sugar and salt in a kitchen aid until light and fluffy. Stir in the flour. Press the dough into the bottom of the baking tin with your hands.

While you wait for the oven to preheat to 350 F. Chill the pan in the fridge. Bake your crust for 12-15 minutes, until very lightly browned. Leave the oven on.

While you wait for the crust to bake, blend your strawberries into a puree. 

Whisk together the eggs, sugar, lemon zest, lemon juice, and blended strawberries. Pour the mixture over the crust and bake for about 35 minutes, or until your filling is set.

After cooling for 1 hour, dust with powdered sugar and enjoy!

fell in love with Plainsbro’s resident cheater

Traditional Irish Soda Bread for Lughnasadh 🌻🍂🌞🌿

This bread is extremely easy to make, quick, and simple but delicious! Being a traditional and antiquated Irish recipe, it’s a wonderful choice of bread to make for Lughnasdah. Irish Soda Bread is also a bread that doesn’t keep for more than a few days, so it’s best for sharing with friends and family during a meal or celebration to ensure it’s all eaten quickly!

You Will Need:

3 cups of white all-purpose flour

1 1/2 tsps of baking soda

1 1/2 cups of buttermilk (you can substitute regular milk by adding 1 tablespoon of white vinegar)

Instructions:

Mix the flour and baking soda in a bowl, and then stir in the milk slowly, incorporating the milk in small increments. I used a wooden spoon to do this until the dough started to form, and then I switched and used my hands. Be careful not to over-stir or over-knead the bread.

Once the dough starts to form, place it on a lightly floured baking sheet and carefully shape it into a rounded disc, approximately 6” - 7” in diameter, and 2” thick.

Brush on melted butter over the top of the bread dough you have shaped, and sprinkle desired herbs on top. (I used rosemary and thyme) Then, cut an X into the top, or you could use any other desired symbol!

Bake at 400 F for 20 - 30 minutes, mine took about 26 minutes! Remove from stove and allow it to set on the baking sheet for 10 minutes before moving to a cooling rack. After an hour, the bread should be set and good to slice and share! I placed mine in a basket wrapped in a towel.

Lammas Breaking Bread Abundance Spell

“Abundance for you, Abundance for me. Abundance times two, Abundance times three. Slice it up, pass it around. Blessings for everyone shall be found.”

“And so mote it be.” 🍞🌿🌻🌽🍂

Strawberry Mint Lemonade

½ C. Granulated White Sugar

½ C. Water

4 Lemons, Juiced (about ½-¾ C.)

½ C. Sliced Strawberries

1 Tbsp. Granulated Sugar

¼ C. Fresh Mint Leaves

2 C. Water

(I know the way I wrote out the measurements is funky, but it is divided for how it needs to be used.)

Begin by slicing your strawberries and put them in a small bowl. Toss with 1 Tbsp. granulated sugar and set aside.

In a small pot, stir together ½ cup granulated white sugar with ½ cup water. Turn the burner on low and heat until the sugar is completely dissolved, creating a simple syrup. Remove from heat.

Either chop up your mint leaves or grind them in a mortar and pestle to release the oils. Mix it in with your strawberries. After about 10 minutes, mash up your strawberries with a fork or potato masher to help release the juices.

Add your strawberry-mint mixture to a small container (I used a jar, but you can use a small pitcher or whatever you have on hand). Pour warm simple syrup over the fruit and let stand for a few minutes. Mix aggressively, or shake if you are using a jar. Add the lemon juice and 2 cups of cold water. Stir well. Let stand in the fridge for several hours, or overnight.

If you are like me and hate pulp in your drinks: let the mixture stand overnight and strain into another container to get rid of the floaty bits. 

Note: I like pretty sour lemonade, so if you don’t love sour things either use less lemon juice or increase the amount of simple syrup.