A Fellow Chronically Ill Angel… I Hope You Have Had A Lovely Day

cmyk angel

Getting signs and responses from my Gods is the best feeling

Contributing to the meme

Yeah so I've been wondering whether or not I'm conceptkin for about a year now, it's been bothering me but I kind of brushed it off, yet now I'm 98% sure I'm conceptkin. I just have to figure out what concept I am exactly, because there's so many that come to mind, but it's all a bit of a blur 😭😭

My nature as an angel has always been abstract, but I just feel that there is way more to that. I am an angel, I am a being of light, but I'm also a concept that's very related to my angehood... or maybe my angelhood is related to that concept???

Opening and closing alterhuman tumblr like a fridge at 3am.

"Odd" things I get species dysphoria from (that you truly could never judge unless you're experiencing them) as an angelkin

- Hunger. It's one of those feelings that simply aren't supposed to belong to me, because I know for sure that back home, we just... didn't eat, you know?? I do not try to suppress it, & it doesn't give me a bad relationship with food; I love food, actually. But sometimes it feels a bit demoralizing.

- Sunburns - even the slightest, least noticeable ones. I'm a radiant being who embodies light.. yet the sunlight is burning me? Hello??

- Having to Google things or learn about them at school. It's not about learning how to cook, how to bake or tie my shoes, because those are human things; but not knowing everything about the stars, the universe and its past and future? It feels so wrong, because my gods have worked really hard to create me and teach me things. I like to imagine that all I learn about science or history or philosophy is just a memory being "brought back" to me.

- Tight clothing. I don't wear most tight things because of their textures which give me BAD sensory issues (I'm autistic), but I also avoid them because they take away the sense of freedom which was already taken away from me.

- Not being able to soothe people when they're upset when I'm the definition of love and harmony. It's technically the reason why I was sent to earth; so that makes me feel useless, like I'm betraying myself.

- The sound of my voice. It used to be much more beautiful, and the fact that I'm bad at singing doesn't help. It's only a reminder of the fact that this body simply isn't mine.

𖦹ׂ ₊ 🪽 and that's all! I just wanted to share these to show that species dyslhoria isn't always dramatically tragic - sometimes it's a bunch of mundane, unexpected, subtle things that add up to the feeling of discomfort and sadness. What can feel irrational and "exaggerated" is actually very valid and deserves to be taken seriously when it's really upsetting you.

HI IM ALSO AN ANGELKIN WHO WAS SENT HERE AT SOME POINT!!! I'm also really homesick a lot honestly, but at least we don't have to go through it completely alone right? Nice to meet you

( @anotherangeltype )

:0 HELLO nice to meet you too !! Yes the homesickness is so bad i liteally had to include it in my username LMAO. And no matter what other angel's (and even fallen angel's) experiences are, it's amazing how this community lets us share experiences and feelings. Tumblr is amazing from this point of view tbh

Songs that make me forget about the mortal body I'm living in

(AKA, songs on my favorite angelkin playlist <3)

1. Runaway - Aurora

2. Goodbye to a World - Porter Robinson

3. Birds Of a Feather - Billie Eilish

4. Light - Sleeping At Last

5. Look After You - The Fray

6. Lovesick - Laufey

7. Duvet - Bôa

8. K. - Cigarettes After Sex

9. Ocean Eyes - Billie Eilish

10. Dernière Danse - Indila

11. Abbey - Mitski

12. The Scientist - Coldplay

13. Edith Wiskers - Home

14. Remember my Name - Mitski

15. I Will - Mitski

16. One - Sleeping At Last

🪽

Sometimes I really want to just like...help other nonhumans live their euphoria ya know? I'm an android, I like making others happy, fulfilling a purpose...

Like yes, I will walk you, good dog!!! Let's play catch and fetch and you can splash in streams and shake off on me and bark and howl and I won't refer to you as if you were human even once until you said a codeword indicating you're ok acting human again now.

Let me stroke you like a good kitty, I have a large pen I can pad like a pet bed and I'll give you toys to play with and a post to scratch!

Oooh You're such a terrifying creature, go ahead and chase me through the forest and I'll cry out and beg for my life as you tackle me (might even let you bite me, who knows) until I say the safeword.

Oh mighty angel let me cast my gaze unworthily to the floor and treat you with holiness and reverence for a day.

Greetings my dear elf, let us explore the woods together, please impart your knowledge on me and show me your ways!

I just want to help, ya know?

Well I started seeing myself as a angel like you suggested, and now I feel better with your reassuring post!! I am excited to see further in my journey as a angelic being and finally not just a boring human whose only last purpose is dying :3 (not making fun of y’all humans, i still love some and a lot are cute and nice)

And I have a question, just out of curiosity because I love seeing winged other kin talk about their phantom wings like idk something is just so whimsical that you feel this.. How does IT generally feels ? When you lay on your back in your bed or simply leaning against a wall, does you sometimes accidentally feels them?

— 🐏🕊️

Ooh I never thought about describing that, but sensing my wings is one of the things that make me the happiest!!

Basically, for me, my body isn't made of flesh and bone - I describe myself as a "being of light" 99% of the time. I remember my wings being feathered in "shape", but they also feel very, very light. I have at least a pair of "traditional" wings on my back, but the ones that are most noticeable are the ones under my "arms" - I don't really know how to explain it, sometimes I have trouble recalling how they actually look like. My real form has two arm-like limbs, and wings that are an extention of them. They aren't big compared to the ones on my back; they're just there.

They are one with my body - I'm aware that they're there, and they aren't numb, but there's no muscle or tissue to them. They feel warm, though.

If I ever start feeling them while I'm lying on my back, they don't really hurt or anything - but it's uncomfortable because they take up too much space, so that's why falling asleep become pretty hard lol. If they brush against something like a wall, I noticed it kind of tickles. And as for when i sit down, it's not really a problem, I can just tuck them in and they dont really get sore at all.

Generally speaking, they don't add any extra weight on my body.. but the ones under my arm can feel uncomfortable and weird, and even when they don't, they still get in the way a lot for obvious reasons. But I ignore that!!! Species euphoria >>>>> not being able to rest my arm on a table, am I right?