There's A Reason Why Hobie "Professional Instigator" Brown, And Pavitr "Ohh He Does Not Know About Hobie"

i'm going to listen to the album of the artist you like even though he's not really my vibe. i'm going to read the book you suggested even though it's not a genre i usually enjoy. i'll watch the show. i will try the recipe. i will play the video game, or at least watch a deep-dive youtube explaining the really-long lore so i have some idea of what's happening. the movie you suggested is too scary for me, but - i mean, the wikipedia page is kind of interesting - look at the length of the section Controversy.

this is not a burden. i think maybe "burden" and "love" might be oppositional, the way sometimes "love" and "hate" are not opposites. a burden is a dragging. i love you because you brought me to the water, and it is the horizon of your heart. i love you because of your nervous pacing around the edges of the rabbit hole.

often you are right. some songs on that album remind me of the spark in your eyes. the book was really thought-provoking.

more i just want to understand enough that you can talk to me. that you can explain, in depth, why it matters that wheat has shallow roots. i love you, even platonically - your love of this thing leaks into me. i watch you, cautious and dancing, the shy desire for you to smear the colors of this thing into my life, too.

they are your colors, though. of course i want them here, in the marginalia of my life. you matter to me. i want them to crowd the little moments of my day. i want your fingerprints scattered throughout the rooms of my heart.

one time i spent about six months reading and researching a particular author, just so i could talk to one of my friends about him. i never got the chance. she betrayed me, broke my trust, and sided with her abusive ex-boyfriend. standing in the sodden floodplain of what she left over, some bitter part of me asked - isn't that tragic? you have all this knowledge and nothing to do with it.

but i did have all that knowledge, though. when i reach for it, i still feel it glow.

"Who Is Superman? A Private Interview with Lois Lane" a fancomic about hope and connection. I've had this story in mind for so long and I'm very excited to be able to share it at last. Thank you for reading, and happy Lunar New Year!

One thing I love about orv is that it initially bait and switches you by convincing you early on that the constellations are the "big bad" of the story - voyeuristic beings that gain enjoyment off the suffering of others - until the reveal that they are also going through their own scenarios. This mirrors how us as the readers are going through our own lives and our own struggles yet we consume media highlighting the experiences of others. We root for these characters, we follow their journeys, we see ourselves in them. And yet we're not villains - we're just surviving. We're escaping the struggles of our own lives by indulging in these worlds created by human imagination. Similarly, many of the constellations in orv do not have malicious intentions despite living off stories - uriel cares greatly for the incarnations she supports (as the "fangirl" archetype) and sun wukong and abfd also greatly support kimcom throughout their journey.

This is further solidified in the reveal of the oldest dream. Despite unintentionally creating worldlines through his imagination, the younger kim dokja was never a villain or "monster". He was simply a child who sook to escape the tragedies of his life through a webnovel. He depended on that novel to survive. And that was in no way the sin he thought it was - not even secretive plotter who had gone through countless regressions and witnessed the despair of the universe could hold it against him. Nor han sooyoung, nor yoo joonghyuk of the 1864th round, nor yoo sangah, nor anyone else in kimcom. No one thought dokja needed to atone for anything - they loved him and cared for him even when he couldn't love himself.

Just like kim dokja and just like the constellations, we are readers seeking an escape from the struggles of reality. And we too are loved - regardless of whether we know it or understand why.

han sooyoung girl of all time. she really painstakingly wrote a whole novel for over a decade for a single reader and then another version of herself logged in just to dislike that person's comments specifically

it IS super funny that orv starts out like "hoo hee i'm just a normal self-inserty power fantasy protagonist! my name is literally 'reader!' just an office worker turned action hero you can project onto slash look up to 🥰" and then very quickly shows that 1. no the fuck he isn't and 2. the story is a detailed interrogation of the nature of self-insert escapist power fantasy. and then the endgame twist that hits you like an emotional freight train is that orv is, in fact, actually very much a self-insert story about how you 🫵 are deeply loved and your survival matters so much that this book was written just to help you find reasons to live. idiot.

Israel is now bombing 1.7 million civilians trapped in Rafah, threatening an imminent invasion of the last “safe place” in Gaza.

Israel is committing the worst crimes in modern history, and Western regimes are calling it “self-defense”.

Never forget. Never forgive.

letter to theo by vincent van gogh

I can be so normal about that very inconsequential topic brought up in conversation 

then and now