Eric, Teaching Jason To Drive: Okay, You're Driving And Salim And I Walk Into The Road. Quick, What Do

Jason: Fuck you Eric.

Eric:

Merwin: Yeah, Eric, fuck you!

Eric:

Joey: Eric, you suck.

Eric:

Clarisse, looking Eric up and down: You look like you shop at vineyard vines.

Eric, tearing up: That is the meanest thing anyone has ever said to me.

Zain: i made you a friendship bracelet.

Jason: you know, i'm not really a jewellery person.

Zain: well you don't have to wear it if you don't want t-

Jason: no, i'm gonna wear it forever, back off!

Jason: No, don't-!

Nick: JASON LISTENS TO WHITE GIRL MUSIC!!

Rachel: What?

Joey: Lmao why??

Jason: BRITNEY SPEARS DIED FOR OUR SINS, OKAY??

Nick: C’mon, Jason. Why do you not like Eric?

Jason:

Jason: Have you ever met a man and it’s so obvious that no one in his life has ever told him to shut the fuck up?

Rachel:

Salim:

Nick, shrugging: Valid.

Jason: Be myself? I have a day to win over Zain. How long did it take before you guys started liking me?

Nick: Couple weeks.

Rachel: Six months.

Eric: Jury’s still out.

Jason: See? “be yourself”, seriously, Nicky? What kind of garbage advice is that?

Nick: Hey, Jason? Can I get some dating advice?

Jason, sighing: Just because I'm with Salim doesn't mean I know how I did it.

Salim: no i’m not tired of being nice, yes i still just wanna go apeshit, these things can coexist, stop asking me

Nick: Is it just me or has Jason gotten smarter since he started fucking Salim?

Rachel: No, no, you're right. Is it some kind of STI?

Nick: Sexually Transmitted Intelligence.

Jason, watching Zain steal something: Man, what an idiot, where are his parents?

Jason:

Jason: Oh shit, I am the parent

Dude, it’s like Rick went through everyone’s solangelo headcannons and went “uhhhh... yeah, I can do that”