The Hawt Spring
The Hawt Spring
This tiny little inn is built around a magical hot spring. The spring has one simple magical property: as long as one is physically bathing in the spring, or a pool conected to it and filled with its water, they seem more than naturally physically attractive. To everyone.
The caretakers no longer allow mirrors at the Hawt Spring, and have a firm limit on how long they allow people to stay. Because otherwise, one can poison one's body image, or lose the ability to find beauty in ordinary people.
If you get on their good side, the caretakers might tell you about all the newlywed couples who would honeymoon at the Hawt Spring before there were rules, and come away ready for divorce, after getting too used to how each other looked while bathing in the Hawt Spring. They would begin to see each other's real bodies as "ugly."
Nowadays, newlyweds are banned from the Hawt Spring, by official decree.
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Whatever else you want to say about Jill Bearup, she called Kylo Ren a "murderous pouty-faced space numpty," so she can't be all bad.
@strange-aeons
if house md were running in 2024 there would be an episode with a patient who identifies as an ‘online content creator’ (cagily) where house agrees to take the case primarily because when he offhandedly refers to her as an onlyfans model both cameron and cuddy get really offended and say it’s a sexist assumption so he doubles down and becomes committed to finding the patient’s onlyfans and proving it. at some point it would be revealed that chase actually is an onlyfans model and started doing it as a stopgap after his dad died and he suddenly got disinherited but he makes so much money off it that now medicine is basically just a hobby. cameron and foreman both disagree with the concept online sex work but it turns out they disagree for different reasons (cameron thinks it’s exploitative and not-feminist, foreman finds it distasteful and thinks people should get ‘real jobs’) and spend most of their scenes together arguing about this while chase gets continually more shifty. they break into the patient’s house and there’s a full ringlight and camera setup which seems to confirm house’s suspicions. while trying to find the patient’s onlyfans house accidentally finds chase’s onlyfans instead and considers publicly embarrassing him about it like he did with wilson’s sex tape but soon realises that most of the staff at the hospital are already subscribed to chase’s onlyfans so makes fun of him for that instead. it then transpires that the reason why the patient is so cagey about being a content creator is that she’s an ASMR artist and all the soap she’s been shaving on camera has irritated her lungs. cuddy is about to make house give her 20 extra hours of clinic duty as recompense but at last minute it’s revealed that the website the patient uses for some of her bonus commissions is, drumroll…onlyfans, because she’s been banned from patreon. how does house know this? wilson is subscribed to her because the soap videos sometimes soothe him to sleep. something by cigarettes after sex plays. roll end credits.
This is very close to the original concept behind Anguish Languish: words now have to be rationed, just like other war supplies. We have to make do with the words we have plenty of.
OK so my shitpost R&D department was researching the viability of a jocular analogy between national language regulators, war rationing, and soviet bread lines. This isn't a viable product right now so you'll have to just kind of imagine that it's funny, but the idea is, like, people are running out of words because they offshored development and then a war footing devastated international trade, so now there aren't enough words to go around and the government is publishing all these posters encouraging people not to waste them. The government has stepped into nationalize word production and distribution but because all the best words are going to the Posters on the war front, the public has to spend hours in line just to get a random selection of words that they can hardly use. People have to find a way to smuggle in illegal foreign words or rely on unsafe home-brewed vocabulary while repurposing all the new words for munitions and war strategy to talk about groceries and romance. Barter dominates, especially in the provinces, as people try to scrounge together a functional vocabulary to educate their children.
Anyway I'm dropping it because I realized that while this is hard to make into a good joke, it would actually be a fantastic strategy/puzzle game. Someone go make that!
Why is this simple fact so hard for people to understand
While on that again, I notice that people do this thing where they're like "TME is useful because it describes how people who are not trans women can and do invent malicious rumors and harassment campaigns about trans women and everyone believes them".
And I'm sorry to point out but it's not just "TMEs" that do this. I have been around here for many years and I can confirm that trans women are just as happy to invent or reblog callout posts and generally do abuse by proxy. Just like everyone else.
There isn't really any kind of identity category that makes someone inherently safe, principled, or progressive.
Ever notice that both Ram and Prius drivers will take up multiple parking spaces, and double down if you call them on it?
Oh, crap, I can't get away from this prescriptivist asshole, there's nothing beyond the wall but water
Overheard last summer in the Downtown Tourist Trap:
(1) "He used, in an hour and a half, a whole can of propane."
(2) (while one of the best-known marimba bands on the West Coast is playing in the park) "There's some odd music over there. Do you wanna come?"
Did I make @homunculus-argument block me, by sending a too-familiar ask, or is their blog actually gone?
I have thousands of shitposts, rants, and essays sitting in notebooks, left over from decades of not using social media or having many friends. Hold on tight.
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