These New Photos Are Bringing The Worst Out Of Me I’m Barking On All Fours

you know whats a problem we have? not enough Patrick Verona x reader fics. Please send me recs

Hey I liked your writing on reader having to get in between Wolverine and Deadpool all the time 😆 it made me think what it would be like if they were crushing on you and there is a rivalry between them. If you could write what they’d do to win your favor or what shenanigans that would come with it 😂 subtle or not

These two weren’t fond of sharing.

So when the other finds that they have similar feelings towards you, the outcome is never good.

They’re childish in a way where if either Logan or Wade was coincidentally standing too close to you, the other was bound to notice and make a scene out of it, all the while you wished you were anywhere else in that moment.

The pair couldn’t get along even if they bothered to try as sooner or later they’d end up stabbing each other just because the other one was breathing too loudly or just merely existing.

And yet their feelings towards you ends up causing Logan and Wade to butt heads more often, especially if you were constantly teaming up together, with you often being their meditator in all their conflicts.

Wade was more vocal and borderline flirty when it came to interacting with you, he would crack jokes, boop you on the nose or even playfully smack you on the ass just to hear your yelp in surprise and become all flustered.

‘Plush ass you’ve got there, babe! wouldn’t mind laying my head on it sometime and use it as a beautiful fluffy pillow.’ - Wade, skipping away.

Wade could be quite clingy at times so there would be moments where you can barely escape the guy as he hanging on your side like a koala bear.

You: Wade can you let go.

Wade: and let go of my emotional support person? *gasp* Do you want me to die?

You: well considering how fast you regenerate, you technically can’t die-

Wade: do you hate me? Do you think I’m clingy?

You: no- well yes but-

Wade: you hate me!

Wade can be dramatic and the only way to shut him up is to just let him be in close proximity of you and allow him to talk your ear off about how good a dog parents you’d be to Dogpool.

Dogpool is your weakness, you could never say no to Dogpool and Wade knows this like the back of his hand and will use this as leverage over wolverine.

After all It’s not like he has a version of himself that was an actual wolverine or maybe even a honey badger in yellow spandex. So Wade counts this as a win on his end.

Logan on the other hand would be more subtle with his approach, even though to Wade, Logan’s subtly was as an dopey cow standing in a field of grass with how the scruffier man tended to keep by your side protectively; so much so that he might as well start growling at every person who ever laid eyes on you in general.

He’s a guard dog of a man in every sense of the word but how that came to be was from a whole lot of trauma and loosing people he’s ever cared about, so needless to say he won’t act like he’s interested in you at first, his heart had been wounded about as much as his body has and even had the mental scars to prove it.

He’s lived a long life of pain, fighting, suffering and heartache. He’s not going to falter so easily until you did something that made him feel safe enough to fall for you.

Once he has however it was impossible to go about the mission without him always wanting to stand guard by your side when he sees someone he doesn’t fully trust, always using his body as a shield for your own as Logan knew he could handle much more punishment then you could. So he’d rather avoid you being grievously hurt by any means possible.

He’d probably scold you if you ever were hurt as he was afraid that he might loose you, yet his hands were gentle but firm as they worked to patch your wound so it’d heal properly.

Wolverine: you’re an idiot you know.

You: wow I really feel the love over here.

Wolverine: *huffs* you expect me to kiss your ass when what you did was reckless and could’ve killed you? *his hands linger on your own even long after he’s done patching you up as though committing your warmth to memory*

Logan is a secret softy who wouldn’t push you away if you were to ever fall asleep on him, he’d grumble but that’s about it.

He’d even toss you his jacket if you were to ever complain about being too cold or leave it somewhere for you to take yourself, again he’d act like he didn’t want you to but he actually did with how he almost smiled upon seeing you looking comfortable in his jacket.

Logan is evidently more subtle about his crush on you then Wade is, or so he’d likes to think but Wade can messily tell he’s smitten when he sees how Logan’s eyes were quick to follow you in a crowded room with protectiveness and adoration.

Wade: aww has our dear friend taken the stick out of your ass and you fell in love?

Logan: *growls* fuck off Wade.

Wade: *holds his hands to his lips and gasps* oh my gosh! You have! Me too!

Logan: *looks at him* you what?!

Wade: yeah cats out of the bag, I like them too wolvie. you’re not the only one to find them cute, how close minded of you seriously.

They can’t share to save their lives, I’ve mentioned this before but they genuinely can’t even if they tried because one is them was bound to get jealous and try to take you away from the other.

Wade: do you really want to be near me grumpy all the time? Yawn fest much.

You: stop riling him up, you’re making Logan mad. Why are you like this?

Wade: maybe because you deserve to be in the company of someone who isn’t still unhealthily hung up on his previous red headed lover.

Logan: you shut your fucking mouth.

Wade: see! He’s not denying it!

You: I’m going to go now. *leaves*

Logan: you should make full time fuck head your job.

Wade: and you should make full time teenage brooder in a full grown man’s body who still isn’t over his first breakup yours.

The shenanigans that would occur between these two would be headache inducing to say the least.

The constant fights that would break out between them that you’d have to break up.

The bickering over who gets to act like a couple with you on missions. They might even play rock, paper, scissors multiple times behind your back.

Wade probably tried to trip Logan up in front of you once but it backfired when Logan made Wade trip up instead as he puts a hand on your lower back and guided you away from the poor Merc with a mouthful of dirt.

Noah x reader hcs where he’s jealous the reader is talking to someone else?

Jealous Noah x reader!

tysm for the request!!

Honestly I would think that Noah is not all that jealous most of the time.

He just strikes me as the kind of guy who wouldn't notice or care about that kind of stuff.

Well until one day when there is someone who is just so obviously flirting with you.

You don't notice of course, and he knows that.

It's been hours too since you'd come over to check in with him, something the two of you did at social gatherings a lot, so when this stranger has taken your attention for as long as they have, yeah he's a little annoyed.

He's not usually one for PDA but in this situation I would think he'd walk over and put your arm around your waist subtly.

"That's exactly why- oh, hi Noah," you chuckled, surprised by his sudden appearance.

"hi," he said simply, glaring daggers at whoever you were talking to.

"Well... I'm just going to- go."

With that they're gone, and Noah smiles a little triumphantly.

"Did you need something?" You asked curiously.

"No it's just you were talking to that mouth breather forever," he says rolling his eyes.

The gears turn in your brain for a few seconds before you piece together the puzzle "oh my god, Noah you were actually jealous?!"

You can't help but laugh a little lightly, as he goes red in the face.

"No I wasn't!"

"You were! Awww, that is super cute!" You exclaim, pulling him closer.

He huffs softly, deciding it's not worth it to fight with you on this.

"Whatever, can we leave now?" He says.

"Sure we can, wouldn't want me talking to anyone else would you?" You tease.

"I wasn't jealous!"

Who should I write for .??

Ok HEAR ME OUT poly! rosie x fem!reader x alastor??? I means sfw headcanons but if you want nsfw who am I to stop you right ANYWAY thanks<3

YES YES YES I AM COMPLETELY SAT AND LISTENING; also side note this did come out a bit shorter then expected I’m sorry. 😞

This is a HALF NSFW work; since you happen to let me 🤭

Poly! Rosie x fem!reader x Alastor, headcanons, SFW AND NSFW, whips and bdsm are mentioned

SFW:!¡

- Alastor and Rosie both take care of reader however not in an infantilizing way! (Well at least Rosie doesn’t) for example Alastor makes sure reader has a roof over their head and food on your plate while as Rosie likes to make sure you feel safe and have someone to talk to about your feeling or she’ll take you shopping and to eat after!

- Rosie learns how to cook food just for you! Since she’s used to eating other cannibals she never even thought about learning how to cook other things and never realized how much she loves it.

- Rosie loves to use expressions like “You’re just so cute, I could eat you!” but the thing his it’s not intentional!

- Alastor tries to carve out time for Rosie and reader but he’s always so busy with the hotel, his solution to this was to take reader to the hotel and have her meet everyone there!

- Y’all go on walks around cannibal town because they both love the scenery and people there; they think it’s awfully nice!

- They always make sure you look all dolled up and with a smile! So if you ever look upset they immediately question it; again mostly Rosie

- They love to gossip; y’all have weekly shit talks one day and Susan roasting the next. 😭

- Rosie is extremely social and definitely goes out of her way to tell you and Alastor that y’all need to make more ACTUAL friends.

- You and Rosie force Alastor to cuddle with y’all because he isn’t a physical touch type of guy and he likes to pretend he doesn’t like it while y’all pull him in.

- You guys sometimes go on picnics and you and Rosie convince Niffty and Husk to come.

- They BOTH have the habit of biting you endearingly; on the shoulder, mouth, and hands/fingers

- Whenever Alastor has a bad day you and Rosie give him lots of hugs and kisses and he acts like he hates it but if he really did then he would stop y’all and spoiler he doesn’t!

- Whoever you and Alastor argue it’s Rosie who calms you down because most of the time you’re mad and Alastor is acting all nonchalant and shit and it’s really irritating.

NSFW:!¡

- They love to keep you sandwiched in between them during hugs, during cuddles, and especially during sex! Rosie finds your tits super satisfying to toy with and fondle and you can bet she’s eating you out from the front while Alastor pounds you from behind!

- They hate when you muffle your moans they love a good vocal reader and they’ll tease you while saying things like “Aw sweetie you should really keep it down huh?” If y’all are in a public place and yet they just don’t let you!

- When it comes down to eating you out Rosie is the master she gets messy on her knees for you, but she’s very teasing just because she knows how good she is but still she won’t make you beg don’t worry!

- They love having you fucked dumb and having reader not be able to do anything but yell out both their name is simply music to their ears.

- You know how I said they love to bite you endearingly well they also love to bite you during sex; whenever you wake up the night after you’re covered in scratches, bites, and hickys.

- They both have a thing for tears they love to overstimulate you, make you cry and then lick your tears clean of your cheeks!

- Whenever I say overstimulate you, I almost always mean Alastor, Rosie is a big tease but she loves leaving you satisfied.

- Alastor leaving scratches is not rare; whenever he eats you out he scratches and licks all over your thighs.

- Rosie isn’t a big fan of straps but if you want it she’s doing it, she’ll pound into you slowly and softly allowing you to feel all around her strap and though it’s not her favorite you to use on you she is damn good at it.

- They are such a duo whenever it comes to degradation because they degrade the shit out of you, and they are so fucking cruel.

- If you and Alastor are both into it he will use whips and bondage on you and he loves to play around with a little brat taming and maybe BDSM however Rosie as freaky as she may be she’s not so much into it so you too beg her to join but it doesn’t take much for her to agree.

I'm not just a bitch, I'm a bitch with a backstory

cuteee

marshmallow electro 🩷

Jake Webber x reader you guys start to become really close ur Tara’s friend so you are always around and he starts to develop a huge crush on you

sugary love

a/n: this is so much longer than i usually write but this request really inspired me so here it is!!!

summary: you and jake are forced to be alone together because tara bailed but it ends extremely well for you two

tw: none

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you recently started doing youtube and it was really working out for you the people loved you. when you started growing in popularity you attended influencer parties and got to know alot of really cool people one of them being tara yummy, you guys had alot in common when it came to your content and the way you dress so naturally you grew really close to her which meant you were always around her friends.

her ex boyfriend jake and her had a really close relationship which shocked you but the more you hung out with them the more you realized they were actually just friends there wasn't any tension between them the friendship felt real and genuine.

tara and zach from the dropouts podcast that she works as a co-host on have been dating for about a month now and she's been telling you all about it their relationship is so adorable and you love hearing all about it but sometimes it just makes you wanna crawl in a hole and die because of how single you felt seeing them together but it was nice to see tara happy.

jake had a food stream scheduled for you, him and tara which you were really excited about because it was the first food stream you'd be in.

you've been in lots of videos with jake, johnnie and tara and they've been in many of yours but you've never been in one of jake's signature food streams.

you were currently on your way to jake's house and you got a call from tara, you picked up anxiously in the backseat of your uber hoping that the uber driver wouldn't be all ears listening to the conversation you were about to have.

"hey tar, what's up?"

you said starting the conversation you assumed she'd say she's running a bit late or she can't find anything to wear.

"y/n i'm so sorry girl, but i can't come today i've got a date with zach it didn't cross my mind when i made plans with jake. i just called him and he said it was fine but i wanted to let you know i won't be there today"

this was the first time that you and jake were gonna be alone you two are close but weirdly you haven't hung out alone at all so you were in for an awkward time when you got there.

"shit ugh it's fine it's okay, i hope you have a really good time with zach tonight and you better tell me all the gorey details when you get home babe."

you said with a laugh, you two said you're goodbyes over the phone after that and it didn't take that much longer before you got to the house.

you got there and knocked on the door and you admired the surroundings of the house while you waited, who knew jake would keep his front yard so clean?

jake swings the door open taking you out of your thoughts. you looked up at him he was wearing a black tank top and his 'no name' pj pants you let out a sigh of relief after seeing that he wasn't wearing anything too fancy because you were wearing an off the shoulder crop top and sweat pants which was a pretty lazy outfit for you.

he had the car keys to his tesla in his hands. when he went to greet you he took you in for a hug and you felt the cool metal of the car keys on your back.

when you two pulled away from the hug you spoke up,

"i haven't had breakfast i'm starving..what are we eating today?"

it was noonish but it was normal for you to skip on breakfast you just had lots of snacks to make up for it.

you and jake were already walking to the car he opened the car door on the passenger side motioning for you to get in and you did exactly as you were told.

before he shut the door to get in on his side he grabbed the roof of the car door leaning forward to answer your question.

"i was thinking crumbl cookie? i haven't done this week's crumbl review yet"

your eyes lit up you had the biggest sweet tooth ever and you fucking loved cookies so much, you nodded vigorously.

"oh my god yes! i love crumbl"

jake chuckled seeing your childlike excitement. he made his way around the car and got into the driver's seat, as he started driving off you looked out the window awkwardly fiddling with a strand of your hair.

jake couldn't keep his eyes off you which made it hard to focus on the road he thought you looked absolutely stunning (like he always does). the car ride was silence with lots of tension and awkwardness hanging around the air, you made it to crumbl before it got too awkward thankfully.

jake reached out and put his hand on the back of your seats head rest looking back as he parked the car.

this did something to you and you couldn't help but admire how he looks so focused so careful, before you could look away his eyes caught yours he smirked as your face turned a bright pink.

you looked away cursing yourself under your breath. he spoke up sensing your embarrassment,

"well we're here"

you look over at him and he's pursing his lips waiting for you to respond.

"yeah yeah um i'm just gonna.."

you go to open the car door but he grabs your wrist firmly enough for you to stop but not too harsh he quickly got out of the car to open the door for you.

"wow jake what a gentleman"

you said teasingly as you nudged his arm a little, he chuckled closing the car door behind you before you both made your way into the place.

as soon as you got in there the smells were heavenly, you took a deep breath taking it all in while jake made his way over to the counter to order.

the flavors this week were milk chocolate chip, confetti milkshake, galaxy brownie, strawberry cupcake and snicker doodle.

your mouth watered at the sight of the box when jake picked it up from the counter.

you grabbed it from him as if it were your first born child and rushed over to the car with him.

the two of you sat down in the car, jake was setting up his phone to start streaming, you pulled out the mirror on the passenger seat side fixing your hair and reapplying your lip gloss.

jake looked over at you his heart thumped a little louder as you pursed your lips forward after finishing.

"you look so pretty"

he blurted out he was a little embarrassed saying something so risky but he played it off cool.

you too tried to hide the fact that you were extremely flustered and you looked at him to reply,

"thanks jake you don't look too bad yourself"

you placed a hand on his face pinching the flesh of his cheek as a grandma would to her grandchild .

jake rolled his eyes playfully and started the stream,

"hey chat! today we're gonna be trying this week's crumbl cookies with the very special miss y/n"

he motioned over to you and you waved smiling at the camera.

the two of you tried all the cookies and were very satisfied with most of them this week's batch did not dissapoint at all.

you were finally on your last cookie of the day before ending the stream it was the galaxy brownie one the one you were most excited for,

jake picked it up splitting it in two and he gave you the bigger half. your heart melted at the gesture you gave him a big genuine smile that was a silent 'thank you'.

you guys both took big bites of the cookie and nodded in approval together just enjoying the chocolatey goodness.

jake looked over to you and his eyebrows furrowed ,

"hey you got some on your face"

you frantically tried to find the spot to wipe it off but you failed miserably.

"here let me"

jake said before reaching out and wiping it off your face. his thumb lingered on your lips for a moment you couldn't get over the way he was looking at you it's as if he was saying 'i really want to kiss you' with his eyes your heart was beating out of your chest at this point.

you both were suddenly very aware that you were still on stream and it took you out of the trance you were in. he swiftly moved his hand away clearing his throat awkwardly.

you curiosly looked at chat letting out a barley audible gasp as you read what was being said,

y/nluvr: bro the sexual tension omg

jakewebbersgf: the eye contact??

iluvjakeandjohnnie: he's literally in love with her

tarashoe: i ship so hard wtf

you gave jake a knowing look and he opened his mouth to speak so he could wrap up the stream before it got too messy.

"okay guys so i think we're gonna wrap it up here love ya so much byee"

you waved bye to jake's phone camera before setting your hands down in your lap and fiddling with your fingers nervously.

jake notices your nerves and tries to push down his own nerves as he speaks,

"so uhm.."

his nerves get the best of him and he can't think of anything to say.

you on the other hand had a wave of bravery and confidence wash over you and you shake your head in a 'i might regret this' kind of way looking into his eyes and leaning in, your lips touch for a second.

he grabbed your face and pulled you in again this time it was passionate and loving you felt bliss.

when the two of you pulled away you were all giggly like teens that just had their first kiss.

his hands were rested on your cheek yours on the nape of his neck.

"so does this mean i don't have to give you the lengthy story of how i've liked you for so long and i was scared to say anything.. because i think that kiss just said it for me"

he said smiling down at you,

"yeah, do you think your kisses can do all your talking? because that was fucking amazing"

you said with a teasing chuckle. he slid his hands down your body resting them against your waist and pulling you in for another kiss.

the rest of the day was spent talking about your feelings towards each other not knowing you were about to be the internet's next 'it' couple and now everyday on you anniversary you'd get crumbl cookie as a reminder of this day.

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seeing some of yall get upset that joseph is with doja is honestly so funny. none of yall had a chance with him in the first place and secondly yes she’s problematic as hell but let’s not act like that’s the only reason yall are hating and claiming it’s “PR” 😭. his fandom is known to be racist, misogynistic and hypocritical as well so yeah let’s not go there. get well soon

this is some shit Jake Webber would text you