Saw This On @kpopstanmeg 's Profile And Thought It Was Cool Lmao. I Actually Like This Colour Scheme

⁺　ׂ　　⋆　 t-t-touch me, and you'll never be alone ☆

li. thunderstorm

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

CHAPTER FIFTY-ONE ─ thunderstorm.

❛ meet me in the pouring rain, kiss me on the sidewalk, take away the pain ❜

Ryu Sunjae's Perspective

My footsteps sounded on the concrete pavement as I ran with all my might towards Eunyoung's house. All the strength in my body was being utilized just to bring me to her and fix all the misunderstandings once and for all. I felt the chilly wind through my hair, and the breeze picking up dust and sending it flying everywhere, as if transporting me to my first meeting with Eunyoung. The skies had begun to grow darker, grey clouds casting their shadow over the Earth. I felt a sharp pain in my left leg, but I kept going, desperation flowing through my veins, pulling me closer to Eunyoung.

How clearly I remembered the very first day I encountered her. It was a day so magical and surreal, unlike any other; And I doubt any day could be compared with it. We had only known each other for a brief few minutes when she took my hand as we ran through the rain without a care in the world. Her actions were so elegant, as if it was the most natural thing in the world, and for the first time, I found myself unable to hate the rain. It left me breathless and awestruck at her sheer beauty- and that smile that I could never erase from my mind.

Memories with little stolen moments with her flashed before my eyes. My mind wandered back to the night of the field trip; Her delicate fingers tracing the contours on my body, her warm touch and seemingly careless drunken words that meant the world to me. At first, I had been quick to believe that it was all a mistake. But there was an undeniable sincerity in her voice, something too real to be ignored.

Realizing that she was upset and in tears because she thought I had left for America blossomed hope inside me. Though it was hard to believe that someone as dazzling as Eunyoung could ever like me back, a feeling in my gut told me that it was meant to be. And all the moments we spent together had come to this. For a split second, I had considered going to America and giving it another shot. But then the thought of being separated from Eunyoung made me feel dizzy and sick.

As I turned a corner, my pace slowed down as I saw her at last, walking in her rain with no umbrella. Eunyoung.

Choi Eunyoung's Perspective

Rainwater trickled down from my hair, onto my face and even my clothes. I felt it slowly dripping down, soaking my jacket as the downpour grew heavier by the minute. The storm was just like the day I met Sunjae, and we ran through the rain without a care in the world. There was a different kind of storm brewing inside of me. The memory came back to me, but rather than feeling happy reminiscing on it, it felt more like a needle pricking me, piercing through my skin.

I dragged my feet along the street. I couldn't even find the strength to lift my feet. No matter how I tried to explain to myself that Sunjae going away was a good thing, and that he would be happier, my stubborn heart continued to ache with longing. The thought of not being able to see him again was unbearable and the thought of which brought tears to my eyes.

My tears, mixing with the rainwater, cascaded down my face like a mighty waterfall. I had never felt more pathetic. Not only had I embarrassed myself in front of the boy I loved, but I had also lost the chance to say a proper goodbye. It was completely heartbreaking and I could feel the pain in my chest as I started to sob loudly. The rain drowned the sound, and it was as if the skies cried with me, engulfed in sorrow.

Just then, I felt someone's grip on my wrist. The touch startled me, and I turned to see who it was with hesitation. My eyes, red and sore, still streaming tears, went wide. It was Sunjae, wet hair dripping down his face and he was breathing heavily. His furrowed eyebrows softened on seeing me, and my heart skipped a beat. Even in this situation... he looked as beautiful as ever.

"Sunjae," I breathed out, "What- what-"

Before I had the chance to finish my sentence, both his hands grabbed my face and I felt his lips crash onto mine. My heart pounded in my head, and I felt my body getting warmer despite the cold rainwater sticking to me. The kiss was aggressive at first, as if desperate to prove a point. I was taken aback. Never in my wildest dreams had I thought something like this would happen. I found myself melting into his kiss without another thought, my body yielding to his touch in the most natural way possible. 

My hands reached for his waist, and in that moment, the world fell away. The sound of the rain pounding against the pavement was muffled, as if we were lost in our own little universe, a place untouched by time or reality. All thoughts, all worries evaporated like mist, leaving just the feel of him—us.

His lips moved against mine with a kind of tenderness that made my heart stutter, like he'd been waiting for this as long as I had. It was as though each kiss carried a silent promise. The raindrops slid down our faces, mixing with the heat of our skin, and it felt right—like the storm itself was rooting for us, draping us in its cold embrace while we burned in the middle of it.

His hands cradled my face so delicately, fitting there perfectly—naturally—as though we'd been sculpted to match each other. The warmth of his palms grounded me, even as my knees felt ready to give way under the weight of everything he made me feel.

And his lips... God, his lips. They were soft, impossibly soft, as though I'd finally found the place I was meant to be. Like they were spun from clouds, stitched together with every unspoken desire I'd ever had. Every gentle brush sent sparks along my skin, igniting a fire that I didn't want to put out.

The rain poured harder, soaking through our clothes, tangling in our hair, but I didn't care. I could have stayed there forever—wrapped in his arms, our bodies close, and our hearts speaking louder than any words ever could. For the first time in forever, it felt like nothing else mattered but him and me. Just us, against the world.

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

nana's notes: at long last!!!

delphi's notes: everyone clap for eunjae 👏🥳

previous chapter next chapter: friday list of chapters here!

a/n: sorry for the mess up in the chapter order and late chapter i was travelling :(

( +🥐 ) ｡˚ ִ⋆｡˚ like we were in paris . . . >_< @the-one-and-only-delphi

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY FAVORITE DAZAI KINNIE

edit: LMAOOO IN ALL THE EXCITEMENT I FORGOT THAT IT'S DAZAI'S BDAY TOO ASJKSHFA HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO DAZAI LOL

i don't think @the-one-and-only-delphi being a dazai kinnie gets any realer than her sharing a birthday with him lmao what a flex

oh my god your acc is so pretty !! 💌

omg this made my day!! thank you so much <33 i love your theme sm it's so angelic 🤍

xxviii. the aftermath

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT ─ the aftermath.

❛ once the flight had flown, with the wilt of the rose ❜

Choi Yumi's Perspective

The surroundings seemed familiar. My mind was clouded with confusion, I couldn't understand what had happened. Moments ago, I remember being on my way home on Taesung's motorcycle, and then we...

"Yumi?" called out Eunyoung's voice which seemed to reflect my puzzled state. That's when I realized where we were. It was our shared apartment in Seoul and we were back to the present. I turned to look at her with furrowed brows, "Check the date quickly!"

She reached for her phone, and the screen displayed 00:02, 1st January, 2023 as the time and date, "What's going on?" she whispered, sounding lost, "This... this means we really time travelled."

"Yeah," I breathed. We had really gone back to the past, to 2008, and now we were back. I stood up to look at the CD player. It displayed 2:00 now instead of 3:00, "What does this mean?" Before I could sit back down, I caught a glimpse of my face in Eunyoung's vanity above her desk. A huge scar on the right side of my face, stretching from my cheek down to my chin. I ran my fingers over it, but there was no odd texture, "W...What's this thing on my face?" I whispered in horror.

I don't quite remember what happened...

❪ flashback ❫

I couldn't make any sense of anything. Where was I? How did I end up there? I had no clue. I could hear loud chattering, someone screaming, the sound of cars passing by in the distance. Then a blaring siren and someone taking me away. What happened after that? I had blacked out completely.

When I opened my eyes all I could see was a white ceiling above me and then the scent of antiseptic hit my nose. Soon, I realized that I was lying down, and my eyes scanned my surroundings. I was wearing a white robe- or was it like a nightgown? I don't have any nightgowns. There were white curtains around the bed I was laying on and that's when the realization hit me like a ton of bricks. I was in a hospital.

The needle piercing through my hand sent a sharp, shooting pain up my arm as I noticed it was there, making me wince. There was a huge white bump I could see on the right side of my face- bandages.

The rest of my memories were in a blur. I could still hear people's voices in the back of my mind.

My mom's voice, screaming, "KIM TAESUNG YOU FUCKING BASTARD!"

Eunyoung's panicked voice and sobs, "Yumi, I'm so sorry..."

My own voice, yelling, "Look what you've done to me! This! This thing on my face is thanks to you! I'm going to have to live with this all my life. So, I'm sorry if the scar on your shoulder is an eyesore. Because that's too fucking bad."

❪ end of flashback ❫

"Don't you remember?" asked Eunyoung after a long pause, "Taesung was dropping you home... and... and then you..." her voice sounded choked and she closed her mouth, realizing it was too painful to remember.

"I think I remember," I said, spacing out. My hand reached to touch the scar again.

"You swore you hated him," added Eunyoung, "You guys had a huge fight. Screaming in the hospital and everything."

"It must have been quite the scene," I bit my lip, recalling the embarrassing memory.

"Yeah," she said. We both sat in the painful silence that hung in the air. The snow pattered against the window, as if it were knocking, asking to be let in.

"I'm sorry," I told her gently, "I'm sorry for all the horrible things I said to you."

"I'm sorry too," she said, reaching for my hand, "It wasn't my place."

"No, it was! It absolutely was!" I cried as the strength returned in my voice, "You're my family and you had the right to be worried. And you were right! He was trouble! And and... and he-"

"Shhh, it's fine," she said, noticing how my voice shook as I spoke, squeezing my hand, "It's over now. It's all forgiven."

Her eyes moved to her phone screen, showing the news article that Eclipse's Ryu Sunjae had passed away. Her eyes widened, then became moist, "It's... I couldn't do anything..."

I could do nothing but gaze painfully at her state, "Look at the display on the Cd player. I'm guessing it means we have two more chances. Two more chances to set things right."

Narrator's Perspective

Waking up and going to work the next morning seemed like too big of a task for me. From the moment the harsh sunlight streaming through the window entered my room, to the shower, it was as if the melody of sonaki rang in my head as tears streamed uncontrollably down my face. It was completely unlike me- I had never felt so pathetic and depressed in my 34 years of living, and I was feeling it now- all at once.

"Adulting is so hard," I grumbled under my breath as I left the house, wearing black because I was grieving. It had barely been a day since I had returned, but my heart ached with desperation and longing. I already missed my daily bus rides with Sunjae, our carefree, almost meaningless conversations. His smiling face and eyes that seemed to me dripping with honey occupied my mind the whole car ride.

"Teenage life was so easy," I muttered to myself as I parked my car and made my way up the elevator.

The moment I opened the door, I saw a sea of people- employees, all clad in black from head to toe. For a moment, I felt a sense of pride. I had made this happen; a team of people who actually gave a damn about journalistic integrity and not just nosy busybodies who wanted to pry into the lives of the rich and elite. A smile almost surfaced on my face when I thought about my slightly dramatic rise to power as I overthrew the previous CEO of The Seoul Daily.

"Ms. Choi," someone called out to me. A familiar face appeared before me as we bowed and exchanged greetings, "Kang Seoyoon, the head of the entertainment department released the article regarding Singer Ryu Sunjae's death because she lives near the hospital he was taken to. Would you like us to start research on the cause?"

The words felt like icicles against my skin- they were too official, so cold that it almost sent a shiver down my spine. I cleared my throat, trying to pull myself together; I then said to her, mustering up all the professionalism in my voice, "Yes, please get started. Tell Seoyoon that it was extremely prompt of her to write the article even though it was after work hours. Thanks."

With a brief nod and bow, she ran off. "You're all doing a really great job!" I cried out to all the hardworking people sitting withing earshot, plastering on my best fake smile, "Keep up the good work and report to me after the front page placements are done."

The news that I heard a while later felt as if someone ran a knife through my heart. Sunjae's cause of death- it was suicide.

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

nana's notes: i guess listening to sad kdrama osts makes me work faster 🤧😭

delphi's notes: sunjae needs to get his death pass revoked frfr :(

next chapter: friday (out now!) list of chapters here!

xxvi. all roads lead to rome

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX ─ between notes and secrets.

❛ there's many different ways you can kill someone you love the slowest way is not loving them enough ❜

Narrator's Perspective

The doors closed with a thud after one final passenger got on and the bus drove away into the darkness of the early summer morning. The sky was littered with little grey clouds, casting a shadow over the city. 

"It's going to rain today," Yumi observed.

"Yeah," Eunyoung gazed out the window with beady eyes, a smile tugging at her lips.

"Why do you react like that every time someone mentions rain? You're such a weirdo," Yumi scoffed.

"It rained the first time I met Sunjae," she said, still smiling.

"So what?" Yumi spat, "Big deal."

"It is to me."

"Shut up. Where is he anyways?"

"He usually sleeps in these days since he isn't on the swim team anymore," Eunyoung stated, "He takes the later bus."

"Oh god, where's the off button?" Yumi pretended to gag, "You're making me sick, stop it. I need a subject change, gosh. Why were you and Mom so solemn at dinner yesterday? I thought someone died."

Eunyoung's eyes darkened, bearing an eerie likeliness to the overcast sky.  Her smile fell and she looked away from Yumi because the answer to her question was probably written all over her face.

"Oh no, did someone actually-"

"No!"

"Thank god," Yumi sighed in relief, "You scared me for a second."

"It was nothing," Eunyoung said in answer to her previous question, "I was just tired, I don't know about Mom."

"If you say so."

"How 'bout you? Where are you mysteriously disappearing these days?"

Yumi swallowed. It was her turn to look away to hide her face that had "guilty conscious" written all over it, "Extra practice at the club," she answered curtly, "Didn't I tell you?"

"You did."

"Yeah, so that's it. Nothing mysterious. Just boring old piano practice."

"If you say so."

💿

Choi Eunyoung's Perspective

How did I end up here? I wondered, staring out of the bus window. It was nearly half past four, and I should have been home, studying—or at least doing something productive. Maybe it was the fact that I hadn't cracked open a textbook in nearly fifteen years, but I just couldn't muster the motivation to do so. Instead, I found myself deciding to visit Yumi.

The bus screeched to a halt, and I snapped my head around to see the doors swing open. I sprang from my seat and stepped off the bus, right in front of the Jagam High music club. Confusion furrowed my brow as I took a few hesitant steps toward the building, then stopped in my tracks. I rubbed my eyes, hoping I was mistaken, but the scene before me was unmistakable.

There, in plain view, was Yumi climbing onto Kim Taesung's motorcycle. The shock must have paralyzed me, because all I could do was stand there, agape, as they sped away, leaving a cloud of smoke in their wake. It took a moment for reality to sink in, but once it did, I snapped into action. 

I began to run.

💿

I must have really been out of my senses to run after a flipping motorcycle, because, by the time I reached what appeared to be Kim Taesung's front door, I stood at a turning where I was sure they couldn't see me, gasping for breath. Honestly, it was a miracle I didn't lose them. God knows how I was able to keep up; It must have been my determination to find out because there's no way I could have done it otherwise.

I leaned against a nearby wall, heaving and breathless. It took me a while to calm myself down, and in the meanwhile, I could hear his front door close and their muffled conversation. To be fair, there was no reason for me to be hiding like this as if I were committing some kind of crime. Yumi's the one who's been lying. To me. And to mom. Yet, she's going about deceiving me in broad daylight, with no shame whatsoever and I'm hiding behind a wall, trying not to get caught.

The tapping of my shoes against the pavement sounded in the empty street. I let out a long sigh. Behind my anger and frustration, I felt hurt. Hurt that Yumi felt the need to lie. No matter what happened, we had always shared everything with each other. Now, there was this secret between us.

"I would never hide anything from her," I muttered under my breath.

What could she possibly be doing with him that she couldn't even confide in me? My pace quickened as I moved towards Kim Taesung's house, anxiety rising in my chest. I practically zoomed past the outer safety door that was left ajar and stumbled onto the veranda and moved towards the front door. I rang the doorbell and waited impatiently, letting out another sigh.

After a few seconds, I racked my knuckles on the wooden door, the sense of urgency evident in my actions. I heard the doorknob rattle as Yumi opened the door. Her frown slowly morphed into a look of absolute shock and guilt. Her eyes instantly widened and she tried to stutter an excuse but it was no use, "Eun...uh.. I, the thing-"

"Save it," I snapped.

She turned to grab her bag from a nearby chair. I scoffed, mostly to myself as I turned to leave. I heard her call out, "I gotta go!" I heard some words of confusion mumbled by Taesung, but my mind was clouded by rage and betrayal. I couldn't comprehend what he said.

Yumi grabbed my wrist, stopping me as I turned around, frowning at her face.

"Eunyoung, please don't do-"

"Don't do what, exactly?!" I yelled, my voice laced with anger, "Yumi, I don't even know what to say to you right now. What is wrong with you?"

"Why are you mad?" she countered irritably.

"Why am I mad?" I repeated, letting out a strangled chuckle at the irony of her question, "I'll tell you why! You're running off to this guy's house I don't know how often a week, and lie to your family. This guy is the spitting image of a delinquent and he has trouble written all over his face. I hope that answers your question."

"I really don't get it, Eunyoung," she screamed, sighing after a few moments, "I don't get why you're interfering like this. It's my life, and let me screw it up! Why're you getting worked up over nothing?"

"Because I'm trying to protect you!"

"Look, everything I do is my choice. So, if I get hurt, it's on me! Just stay out of it, for God's sake, Eunyoung!" she screamed, "You're not even my real sister, so why does it matter?"

Her words pierced through my heart and all my anger melted away in a moment. The frown fell from my face and I felt a lump in my throat.  I took a step back watching Yumi realise the gravity of her words. They seemed to prick and burn my skin. My lip trembled as I stuttered out, "Fine."

I broke into a run onto the pavement as I faintly heard Yumi's voice call out to me in the distance, but I didn't look back. My vision blurred as tears streamed down my face.

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

nana's notes: ouch, yumi, that stings.

delphi's notes: oh eunyoung, only if you understood.

list of chapters here! click here for next chapter.

inconvenience regretted 😞

xxiii. whispers in the dark

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE ─ whispers in the dark.

❛ and i should get a ciggarette for so much restraint ❜

Kim Taesung's Perspective

For a few moments after Yumi left, I found myself staring blankly at the door. I too was shocked at the fact that I offered to teach her guitar. Did I have that much restraint? And that too, at my house? I couldn't stop thinking of her and it drove me nuts. Tonight, she looked stunning. She had always been pretty, but today? She took my breath away. Her hair framed her face in a way that seemed so effortless, like a masterpiece painted with the dim light bulbs that lit up my living room.

I couldn't shake off the conversation that I had with Inhyuk in the kitchen. He said Yumi was the one who planned everything, and then slapped my shoulder playfully. Was it really the case? Or was he just teasing me? I had so many questioned swirling around my head, and I couldn't make sense of any of them.

I suddenly remembered that she got me a gift. It really wasn't a big deal, I tried to tell myself. Everyone got me gifts. But desire to see what she got me devoured me whole and I found myself inching towards the dark blue paper bag that sat on the table, which seemed to be calling out to me, waiting to be opened.

I sensed some hesitation as my hand reached inside it, pulling out a box—that seemed rather heavy for its size. My heart pounded in my ears as my fingers brushed against the smooth, velvety surface. A chill ran down my spine as my eyes landed on the label.

It was a perfume.

The delicate glass bottle shimmered in the dim light, its contents a mystery waiting to be unveiled. A wave of emotions crashed over me—surprise, confusion, and a strange sense of anticipation. How did she know? Had she been paying attention to my preferences, or was this a random act of kindness?

With a shaking hand, I lifted the box lid, revealing a delicate glass bottle. It was a simple rectangular bottle, yet its cold surface sent shivers down my spine. A clear blue liquid swirled within it. My hand reached for the bottle cap, unscrewing it with a newfound gentleness in my hands. I lifted the bottle up to my nose, inhaling the scent.

Unlike anything I'd expected, the fragrance was a captivating paradox. Woody notes, reminiscent of sun-warmed cedarwood, formed the base, grounding the scent with a sense of strength and earthiness. But then, a wave of unexpected freshness washed over it. A hint of salt air hit my nose, and I could practically feel the ocean breeze. It was the scent of a tropical beach after summer rain, where the heat had coaxed out the earthy aromas of the forest floor while leaving the air fresh and alive.

What does this mean?

Choi Eunyoung's Perspective

My mom had come into my room about half an hour ago, bidding me good night. I too, had tucked myself into my warm, comfy bed, when the realization that Yumi wasn't home hit me like a speeding truck on an expressway. An uneasy feeling washed over me, as all my drowsiness was drowned out by worry and concern. Ever since then, I've been sitting on the kitchen platform, staring out the little square window that looked down on the street.

I remember the day I first met Yumi. It was one of my most vivid memories as a child when my age was just a single digit. I don't remember a lot of things from when I was that little but that day was fresh in my mind as if it happened yesterday. I had heard a loud wailing sound from the sand pit in the park and found Yumi crying because all the other kids had sand toys except her. I remember chuckling and offering my toys, telling her to stop crying. I never knew that she would become such a significant part of my life.

When Yumi had been working at the law firm, I watched the spark slowly disappear from her eyes each evening she reached home. The vibrant young woman I knew was slowly fading away, slipping from my reach, replaced by a weary stranger burdened by unseen woes. My heart ached for her, but my attempts to reach out were met with a wall of silence. Whenever I brought up the subject of her job, a guarded look would cloud her features, and the conversation would hit a dead end. It was as if her feelings were locked in a vault, and she'd thrown away the key.

That's why, when I spotted her- practically skipping down the street, my lips stretched into a huge grin. I hadn't seen her smile like that in ages. It was as if someone had flipped a switch within her, igniting a forgotten light that had been buried beneath the weight of her burdens. The world, usually cast in a dull, dreary filter, seemed to come alive again. Even the streetlights, normally harsh and flickering, seemed to dim in reverence, their feeble glow overshadowed by the radiance emanating from Yumi.

Instead of letting myself ponder on the reasons for her newfound joy, I let myself appreciate the happiness radiating off her. Though we weren't related by blood, our bond was as strong as that of real sisters. I wanted her to keep smiling like that for the rest of time. 

As I heard her footsteps making their way to the front door, I leaped off the platform and bolted to my room, switching off the lights in a frenzy. I stumbled on my way, not being able to differentiate a lamp from a clothing rack thanks to the fact that I was sitting like a ghost in the darkness. Aside from the fact that I would have knocked the living daylight out of her, it would have been pretty difficult to explain why I was awake at that ungodly hour. I lay in my bed- that somehow felt warmer than before, and let myself fall into a slumber as the smile never left my lips.

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

nana's notes: the header turned out so cute (*^_^*)

delphi's notes: taesung entering his loser era

next chapter: saturday list of chapters here!

xvii. bandaids don't fix bullet holes

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN ─ bandaids don't fix bullet holes.

❛ who do i have to speak to about if they can change the prophecy?❜

Choi Yumi's Perspective

Meow!

The moment the shrill sound reached my ears, I looked around frantically to see where it was coming from. I hadn't seen the kitten in a few days; Now that I think about it, the last time I saw her was when Taesung was petting it. I advanced towards the bushes behind the bus stop near the music club. There it was, a tiny ball of grey fur hidden in the overgrown green shrubbery. 

I crouched down slowly and cautiously, taking a deep breath. Every instinct in me screamed to scoop up the fragile creature, but Taesung's advice echoed in my head. Blinking slowly, mimicking the cat's lazy blinks, I extended my hand, palm down. The kitten, all matted fur and wide, wary eyes, remained frozen. A pang of disappointment squeezed my heart. Maybe Taesung's advice only worked for him.

Just as she was about to withdraw her hand, a tiny pink tongue darted out, giving my fingers a tentative lick. A delighted gasp escaped my lips. The tension in the kitten's body seemed to ease, and it nudged its head against my palm, purring like a little engine. A warmth bloomed in my chest, a warmth that had nothing to do with the summer heat.

The little kitten's gestures, its soft blinking and mouth that seemed to smile, all resembled Taesung. It was as if I could see his face in front of me, unserious as ever. 

"You know, you look exactly like him," I whispered to the kitten, who was merely a clueless furball purring against the palm of my hand.

Choi Eunyoung's Perspective

It was a regular summer afternoon─ except it wasn't. The bright light from the blazing sun entered my room through the gaps of my curtain. The humidity in the air pressed upon me like a burden I had been carrying for many years. My lunch seemed to have started dancing in my stomach, making me drowsier; But there was a different something that kept me alert. My school books lay open on the desk in front of me as I sat in my spinning chair, my head leaning against the backrest. I fidgeted with the pencil in my heart.

Today wasn't just any ordinary day, it was the day of Sunjae's surgery. My left leg shook like a 4.0 magnitude earthquake, occasionally hitting the underside of my study table, sending a shooting pain through my body. My eyes fixed on the window in front of me─ Sunjae's bedroom window. I had often caught glances of him moving around his room, going about his life. The events of last week flashed before me. 

The sharp sound of his father's palm against Sunjae's face still echoed in my mind. The sound of Sunjae's frantic footsteps against the pavement coming to a sudden halt when I stopped him; Our quiet sobs as we clung onto each other, and the space between us was too clear in my head. I could practically see it unfold in front of my eyes.

A single tear traced a cool path down my cheek, a stark contrast to the prickling heat that had bloomed on my face. I reached up to wipe it away, the sterile silence of the apartment pressing down on me. But the quiet couldn't contain the storm brewing inside. My body seemed to act on autopilot, a stark contrast to the sluggish crawl of time earlier. I bolted from my chair, a desperate energy coursing through me.

"Mom! I'm going out for some time!" I yelled, the words tumbling out in a rush. The nail salon door clattered shut behind a customer as I raced down the stairs, not bothering to lace up my shoes. My mom's reply, if there was one, was lost in the pounding of my own heart. 

Everything seemed to happen so fast. Jumping into a taxi, I blurted out the name of the hospital, feeling a desperate need to be near Sunjae. Was he okay? Had the surgery gone well? I had to know. My hands reached for my skirt pocket, as a sigh of relief escaped my mouth knowing that my wallet was still there.

Bursting through the automatic doors, I skidded to a halt, chest heaving. The sterile smell of disinfectant stung my nostrils, a harsh counterpoint to the frantic questions bubbling up my throat. But before I could voice any of them, a sliver of conversation snagged my attention, pulling me towards a curtained-off area.

"...extensive damage," a doctor's voice, grave and laced with sympathy, drifted through a door left ajar. "The surgery went well, but the nerves... I'm afraid competitive swimming is out of the question."

My heart, as if it was made of glass, shattered into a million pieces scattered across the hospital floor. The world seemed to tilt on its axis, the sterile white walls morphing into a dizzying maze. Sunjae wouldn't be able to swim? The very foundation of his dreams, his passion, shattered? A strangled sob escaped my lips, the sound harsh and alien in the sterile silence. My hand flew to my mouth, muffling the sound, but the damage was done.

As I sat on the metal benches outside the room where Sunjae was, the contact of my legs against the metal was almost as cold as the reality that had been shoved in my face a few moments ago. All my feelings of self-loathing and self-doubt had become a mush in my chest as my muffled sobs echoed against the pale white hospital walls. The sitting area was almost devoid of people. The occasional nurses and doctors passing by paid no attention to the breakdown I was having.

After all, the sight of someone crying in a hospital is not an uncommon thing.

Narrator's Perspective

Sunjae emerged from the operation room, the syringe poking through his hand was a painful reminder of the doctor's words. His heart ached for the ruins of his future career, reduced to dust. He leaned against a wall, heaving a deep sigh as he felt a lump in his throat as he felt the tears forming in his eyes. Just then, the sound of muffled sobbing reached his ears before his tears could spill out. He thought he was hearing things,  but this presumption was quickly disproved as he peeked into the waiting area.

A girl sitting in solitude on the metal benches─ Eunyoung. Sunjaes heart seemed to stop at the sight. She leaned forward, her head buried in her hands as her sobs echoed through the empty hospital halls. This seemed to send a shooting pain through Sunjae. She was crying because of him, he thought to himself.

Sunjae had never felt more pathetic as he watched her from a distance, not daring to take a single step forward. 

A single tear slipped down his cheek.

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

nayoung's notes: i cried while writing this btw.

delphi's notes: i think i'm emotionally attached to this cat. (the other one too)

next chapter: saturday (out now!) list of chapters here!

lvii. by the seashore

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

CHAPTER FIFTY-SEVEN ─ by the seashore.

❛ we never played t by the numbers, baby but we were making it count ❜

Narrator's Perspective

"This is our ride?!" asked Eunyoung, pointing at Taesung's little teal colored car parked in front of them. While they were planning their weekend trip to Inhyuk's village to coerce him into going through with the Eclipse performance for the university festival, Taesung had mentioned that he could take the four of them in his car; The four of them being Sunjae, Yumi, Eunyoung and himself. However, he never told them that it was half the size of a normal car.

"Does it even work?" asked Yumi as a frown surfaced on her face and she squinted her eyes, as if trying to find the potential in the car.

"Do you guys want to go or not?" Taesung asked impatiently. He felt quite offended by their light-hearted comments because he had been saving up to buy the car for a long time, and he was proud of it; But he couldn't help but agree with them a little bit, because the performance of the car was questionable...

*many minutes later*

"Choosing to drive this car is like wearing vintage heels to a dance marathon," Eunyoung sighed, "And we all know how well that worked for Lorelai Gilmore."

"Only you could find a way to make this about fashion," Yumi rolled her eyes.

"Don't take it out on me, your boyfriend is to blame for this pleasant situation we're currently in," she countered, "Just when I was starting to think you were an alright person."

Turns out the best word to describe Taesung's car was slow. A bicycle and a bunch of children had zoomed past them in the last hour. It was quite humiliating for everybody in the car, except Taesung. His heart was still full of admiration for his precious car he had lovingly named "Sunny."  

Yumi sharply turned to eye Eunyoung after she used the word boyfriend, as if to say "Are we still keeping this up?" 

Sighing, Eunyoung turned to Sunjae who was sitting beside her, "Also, since you're here, I may as well tell you that Yumi and Taesung aren't actually dating."

"What?!" Sunjae said looking visibly shocked by this news, "But... why?"

"That's an excellent question to ask," Eunyoung said sarcastically, "They originally did it so this sorry excuse of a guy would leave Yumi alone, but why they're still at it is beyond me."

"This is so not the time," she said, gritting her teeth and glaring menacingly at Taesung. His eyes were still on the road, which she could see through his sunglasses.

"Can't it go any faster?" Sunjae asked in desperation.

"No. It can't" answered Taesung curtly. Everyone in the car groaned irritably.

"We would have reached in half the time if we just took a train," Sunjae whined, "Maybe less."

"I'm hungry," Eunyoung complained.

"I have an idea," Yumi said spitefully, "Let's cook Taesung using the fire we make by burning his car." He didn't reply, but anyone could tell he was scared for his life.

"Thanks for taking away my appetite," said Eunyoung with disgust.

Choi Eunyoung's Perspective

After god knows how many excruciating hours in Taesung's car, we had reached Inhyuk's village in Busan at long last. He was quite shocked to see us, and took us to his parents house. Inhyuk's parents gave the four of us a warm welcome, after which we visited the beach. Taesung and Sunjae talked to Inhyuk privately, and managed to convince him. Yumi and I felt as if a weight had been lifted off our backs as we realized that we hadn't made any fatal mistakes when it was our last chance to travel back in time.

Things were going well- almost suspiciously so. We were eating ice cream while sitting at the beach, gazing at the ocean. When Yumi and I time travelled from 2023, it was winter- a cold, biting winter that cut through my skin and sent aches through my body every time I thought of Sunjae's nearly inevitable fate. But here, in 2009 it was the peak of summer. And though sometimes the scorching heat made it feel like steam was coming out of my head, it was comforting. Flowers bloomed everywhere, and the world seemed as if somebody painted it with vibrant watercolors. Even now, the sea looked so majestic- deep blue, extending towards the horizon and water glittering like diamonds had been scattered everywhere. 

It all felt so serene, so calming. And for a brief moment, my worries about my dad seemed to fade into the background as my ears filled with the call of birds I'd never seen before and the sound of the waves crashing against the shore. I stole a quick glance at Sunjae, only to see that he was already looking at me with a fond expression on his face. I felt warmth creeping up my face as my lips stretched into a smile. He promptly smiled back, placing his hand on mine, his touch soft and gentle. Sunjae always had the most comforting feeling about him, and whenever he was around, all my fears seemed a little less scary, and I felt a little bit  braver.

But of course, something had to happen to interrupt this moment we were sharing. Suddenly, Yumi called out, "Look! It's Taesung's car!" All five of us turned to look at where she was pointing. To my horror, I watched in pure disbelief as Taesung's car slowly but surely drove itself into the sea. It's slow pace made the entire scene look rather ironic and comedic. I couldn't suppress my laugh that slipped out, which was reciprocated by Sunjae as we giggled uncontrollably.

"This isn't funny! How are we going to get home?" Yumi snapped, her tone sharp and worried. Her seriousness made the whole thing seem a lot funnier. Inhyuk just seemed amused by the situation and smiled to himself cockily.

Taesung, on the other hand looked absolutely devastated that his precious car was going to sacrifice itself for the mighty ocean. He fell to his knees and placed both his hands on his head and cried out dramatically, "Sunny!" His tone sounded so hurt and pained that for a moment I almost felt sorry for him. 

My phone buzzed in my pocket, and I had to press pause on my laughing fit to see who it was. I froze for a second when I saw that it was Detective Kim- Taesung's dad who was calling. "I gotta take this call, I'll be right back," I said to Sunjae, who was still laughing. He nodded and I quickly moved away from everybody before accepting the call.

"Hello," I said urgently, "Did something happen? Are there any developments?"

"Yes, actually. We've discovered your father's location," he said, and I could hear the hesitation in his voice, "He's currently hiding in Busan."

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

nana's notes: and the plot thickens

delphi's notes: poor sunny :"(

( +📽️ ) ͏ ͏ ͏͏ oh say it ditto . . . ͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏@nayoungs-archive

𓇼 𝑵ayoung, she/her, main!

nayoung's writing!

TOWARDS YOU ── lovely runner. ➡️ (on hiatus till april 4th)