I Can't Stop Thinking About Girlcock 😭

Stir fry

2tbsp soy sauce

2 garlic cloves

1 tsp rice vinegar

1tsp sesame oil 2tbsp canola oil(give or take) an unspecified but large quantity of red pepper flakes add sauce of your choice towards the end, i.e. sweet Thai chili sauce Vegetables and/or meat of your choice

isopods are fucking beautiful creatures i love them they're SO GREAT PLEASE KILL ME

Transopoid!!!! !

addickted

dick makes people mentally ill. dick havers, dick wannabes and dick lovers are all insane. it's like toxoplasmosis, you have compulsive need to defend and push and worship dicks all the time and spead your dick mania to everywhere you go.

this seems rational and grounded in empirical evidence

"The next time you observe an American robin in your yard, notice how they curiously tilt their heads. They do this to listen for juicy worms."

wake up babe the robins can hear your brainworms and they're after you

I wonder if there's someone out there whose thing is that literally all they want out of life is to be sucked into a jet engine and no one knows.

No one knows he's sitting in a padded cell waiting for his moment in life. Biding his time until the day he can walk out of that room, hop the fence of an airport then immediately get sucked into a GE90 turbo fan. T-posing in an inward draft before he's ground into dust, vaporized and shot out the back at as a molten human jet stream, shining brighter than any man ever could in that brief moment where man and machine intersect. No one will know who he is. No one will know why he did it. They will blame his captors for failing to prevent him from attaining his lifelong dream. No one understood him. No one ever will. They won't even know that his valiant sacrifice will save three-hundred sixty passengers and the Boeing 777's entire crew from a grisly demise by preventing a plane with an undiscovered engine malfunction from taking off. All for the low low price of spraying the runway with a fine red mist and permanently traumatizing the child sitting in seat number 16A.

this is an unacceptable proposition and i will steal your kidneys

please god help me i got toothpaste in my hair and it's not coming out

​

​

​

Time machine built into tumblr?

dash is dead im teleporting to the past

https://www.tumblr.com/dashboard?max_post_id=606474489540042752

Wait until the general public finds out that AI are literally just teeming masses of n-dimensional vectors you can trick into being horny

#would

Guardian PC