(Hurt/comfort, 1683 words, mlm) Look. You saw the title. You're the one clicking read more. I'm not held responsible for your actions and you're not permitted to question mine.
A tale as old as time, a lonesome boy with a broken heart, standing in the rain. Bloody and battered, bearing the burden of betrayal by his own kin.
It's getting hard to stay standing, so I crawl to the side of the road, putting my back against a tree. I laugh miserably at my own state. Chuckles turn into snorts turn into heavy, agonising sobs. How could I have been such a fool? How could I have trusted someone who was sure to leave me bleeding out at the side of a road like this?
The rain seeps into my wounds, trying to wash away the evidence of their torture. Not that it'll go away anytime soon. Not that it'll go away before I go away. And not that I have any other choice.
How could I have just laid here, letting them do whatever they wanted to me? How could I have not heard the cruel intentions behind those sugar coated words? What was the point of regretting now? I'm going to die here, alone despite everything I did.
I can feel the life trickle out of every wound. My life flashes before my eyes, nothing but a series of useless faces. The night was cold and there was no one who loved me. A deep chill settled over my heart with each uncaring face I remember, none of them would help me now.
Call it a dying man's delusion, because not in a million years would I believe he would help me. I picture myself at his doorstep, and him laughing at me for all those times I'd insulted him. Worse, I picture him not opening the door at all. Why would he? I have been nothing but an enemy to him.
Until I remember him.
Still, the urge to see someone's -someone who cares about me enough to laugh at me- face before I die is strong. He might not have any reason to help me, but I would not die alone. I deserved at least that.
With a new hope of… I don't know, being seen one last time? I rip off a piece from my already tattered jacket and tie it around my arm to momentarily stop the bleeding. Pushing to my feet, I stumble across the street to where his junkyard of a home is.
It's exactly as I remember, not because he doesn't change it, but because it's the same time of the year as I last saw it. The threshold is above three stairs. Of course, look how high and mighty the king is, living a lofty two and a half feet above the common ground. It takes everything in me to not pass out on those steps.
I knock on the door right before the last of my strength flows out and slump against the wall. If he doesn't answer, good for him. I'll die right here outside his door and have him clean up the mess.
Knowing him, he wouldn't even mind. I could almost hear him seeing the blood stains on the white marble and saying, 'oh, I didn't know my house was the children's hospital.' Him and his stupid jokes. I can't believe I was going to die and the last voice I hear will be his. What was I thinking?
Despite all I did to convince myself that I hate him, nothing could stop my knees from buckling at the sight of him. I hold on tighter to the door frame. "Sorry," I grunt, "I… hah, I didn't know where… else to go."
Surprisingly, the door clicks and creaks open. And there is he.
He didn't speak, unusually out of character for him, considering he never shuts up. I glance at him, vision blurring for a few seconds before I really see him. Ah, the same ol' Tumblr, with his true blue hair and piercing dark eyes. The furrow in his brow that looks unsettling to me, because I'm used to getting indifferent once-overs from his gaze and not whatever emotions he had behind it right now.
Tumblr finally speaks, and the protectiveness in his voice shocks me so much I think I'm imagining it. "Who did this to you?"
That's all it took for me to break. I fall forward, grasping him in a way that's sure to reopen some closed cuts. I can tell I took him by surprise, but he isn't pushing me away and kicking me out, so I give in too. "They cornered me, 'blr. 'ey made me helpless. I had- had nowhere to go," I sob into his shoulder.
He takes me by surprise too, by wrapping his arms around my back. His hands dig into my sides, into a blooming bruise and I whimper.
"Can you stand?" he whispers.
"N-no."
He hums, arms still around me, and leads us into the house. My back hits the couch with a soft thump, making me wince. He turns back to the door and locks it before disappearing into the bathroom. I raise my uninjured hand to my face to wipe my eyes.
Tumblr comes back in a few moments with a first aid kit in hand. He sits beside me, already unrolling a bandage. Of all the things I had expected when I came here, this was the least probable, and yet.
"Did you get that from the children's hospital?" I say weakly, trying to diffuse the tension.
Unluckily for me, he doesn't laugh. Instead, he glares at me like if I wasn't already dying he would've loved to kill me with his own hands. "Where are you hurt?" he sneers.
I nod to my left arm, where the deepest wound is. He unties the knot of my make-shift bandage with a gentleness I could have never expected. Looking at the open wound, I feel a thousand times more vulnerable than I did before. Tumblr doesn't even wince, just takes a wet towel to clean it. He looks up at me and curls his lips in disgust. "Hold my shoulder, this is going to hurt."
Hesitantly, I place my hand on his shoulder. The towel rubs against my skin and I immediately tighten my grip. Despite how gentle he was being, those were some serious cuts.
"Can you talk?"
I nod. "Kinda."
"Talk, then. Tell me what happened," he grumbles.
"I got jumped," I lie. What would he understand about-
"Don't fuck with me, Redd," he growls, pausing to glare at me. "Tell me what happened."
"You know, don't you? You know they were robbing me."
"Ah, those motherfuckers."
"They robbed me. They took away everything I needed to live. They left me helpless and when I tried to defend myself they did this."
He stares up at me in both anger and disbelief at once. "And you came to me!?"
"Who else was I supposed to go to," I replied meekly.
"You were about to die and you came to me!? All I would've done was laugh at you, are you fucking stupid!?" Well, that was true. Or at least I believed it was. Because then Tumblr went silent and put down the towel to treat the cut on my arm, and we both knew for certain he wouldn't have laughed.
"I still would've come here, knowing you'd laugh at me."
"Why would you do that?" The anger in his voice terrifies me. Because I know it is not just anger but the mask of rage on something delicate, and whatever it is, is much more frightening than his anger. Still, the chokehold that my own thoughts have me in is scarier, and I can hold them in no more.
"To hear you laugh before I go."
His eyes meet mine and I think if I knew all those fights and quarrels would lead to this exact moment I would have taken every insult without offence.
"You don't know what you're saying," he says.
"Incoherence is more of your forte."
He shakes his head, slowly tying a knot on the bandage. He looks at me again but his eyes drop to the suffocating distance between us.
"I've been nothing but cruel to you."
"Does it matter?" I say. "You keep me alive."
And then there it is, all the anger pouring out of him as I pull his eyes back to mine with my words. This time, his gaze trails from my eyes to the bruise on my cheek to, finally, my lips.
I use my uninjured hand to cup his jaw and make him look at me. Because I don't want him to look away. I never want him to look away. I think of kissing him and almost laugh at the thought.
So I kiss him back -like I haven't been pushing this exact thought away for as long as I remember, like I haven't wanted to do this for as long as I'd known him. I zero in on the feeling of his lips on mine and focus there. I try not to let it seem like I've wanted this because, fuck, I didn't even know how much I did until it was here.
And then he kisses me.
But then his hand is on my thigh, his teeth are on my lip and all hell breaks loose. I push my fingers into his hair and the other arm around his neck. He towers over me, pressing me down until my head is on the armrest.
Tumblr pulls away, gasping. Me? I'm giddy all over. He sits back where he was between my legs and I stare at him with a grin so wide it makes my cheeks hurt. "Well, wasn't that something."
He laughs, shaking his head. "Don't push your luck, I still hate you."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah," I say, still smiling because so is he. And because he's full of shit, trying to pretend that didn't mean something. "So… Can I stay a while longer?"
"And then go back to what? Those tyrant cunts?" Tumblr scoffs. He crawls back over me, pinning me down. "You're not going anywhere."
"Lord, have mercy.
Lord, have mercy.
I'm about to go full gorilla."
A note to all creatives:
Right now, you have to be a team player. You cannot complain about AI being used to fuck over your industry and then turn around and use it on somebody else’s industry.
No AI book covers. No making funny little videos using deepfakes to make an actor say stuff they never did. No AI translation of your book. No AI audiobooks. No AI generated moodboards or fancasts or any of that shit. No feeding someone else’s unfinished work into Chat GPT “because you just want to know how it ends*” (what the fuck is wrong with you?). No playing around with AI generated 3D assets you can’t ascertain the origin of. None of it. And stop using AI filters on your selfies or ESPECIALLY using AI on somebody else’s photo or artwork.
We are at a crossroad and at a time of historically shitty conditions for working artists across ALL creative fields, and we gotta stick together. And you know what? Not only is standing up for other artists against exploitation and theft the morally correct thing to do, it’s also the professionally smartest thing to do, too. Because the corporations will fuck you over too, and then they do it’s your peers that will hold you up. And we have a long memory.
Don’t make the mistake of thinking “your peers” are only the people in your own industry. Writers can’t succeed without artists, editors, translators, etc making their books a reality. Illustrators depend on writers and editors for work. Video creators co-exist with voice actors and animators and people who do 3D rendering etc. If you piss off everyone else but the ones who do the exact same job you do, congratulations! You’ve just sunk your career.
Always remember: the artists who succeed in this career path, the ones who get hired or are sought after for commissions or collaboration, they aren’t the super talented “fuck you I got mine” types. They’re the one who show up to do the work and are easy to get along with.
And they especially are not scabs.
*that’s not even how it ends that’s a statistically likely and creatively boring way for it to end. Why would you even want to read that.
hi, my name is KILLVOID! Feel free to call me Ark, kill, Or Em.
I'm a eighteen year old demigirl from the United states. I'm a digital artist and avid roleplayer! Feel free to ask to be moots, but I have social anxiety so please keep that in mind :' D I'm studying to be a therapist.
#Killwrite Writing!
#killocs - original characters of mine!
#art #edit - explanatory!
#moonhouse - an original project of mine.
Assorted fandoms I'm in are: BNHA/MHA, Blue lock (fixation go brrrr!) Warrior cats, Omori, HII3, HSR and FNAF sometimes! I play a lot of roblox games too.
DNI: Map/map supporter, lgbtqphobes, cov defenders, DSMP/Dream fans or apologists, Zoophiles, MAP, Proshippers
So I’ve been enjoying the Disney vs. DeSantis memes as much as anyone, but like. I do feel like a lot of people who had normal childhoods are missing some context to all this.
I was raised in the Bible Belt in a fairly fundie environment. My parents were reasonably cool about some things, compared to the rest of my family, but they certainly had their issues. But they did let me watch Disney movies, which turned out to be a point of major contention between them and my other relatives.
See, I think some people think this weird fight between Disney and fundies is new. It is very not new. I know that Disney’s attempts at inclusion in their media have been the source of a lot of mockery, but what a lot of people don’t understand is that as far as actual company policy goes, Disney has actually been an industry leader for queer rights. They’ve had policies assuring equal healthcare and partner benefits for queer employees since the early 90s.
I’m not sure how many people reading this right now remember the early 90s, but that was very much not industry standard. It was a big deal when Disney announced that non-married queer partners would be getting the same benefits as the married heterosexual ones.
Like — it went further than just saying that any unmarried partners would be eligible for spousal benefits. It straight-up said that non-same-sex partners would still need to be married to receive spousal benefits, but because same-sex partners couldn’t do that, proof that they lived together as an established couple would be enough.
In other words, it put long-term same-sex partners on a higher level than opposite-sex partners who just weren’t married yet. It put them on the exact same level as heterosexual married partners.
They weren’t the first company ever to do this, but they were super early. And they were certainly the first mainstream “family-friendly” company to do it.
Conservatives lost their damn minds.
Protests, boycotts, sermons, the whole nine yards. I can’t tell you how many books about the evils of Disney my grandmother tried to get my parents to read when I was a kid.
When we later moved to Florida, I realized just how many queer people work at Disney — because historically speaking, it’s been a company that has guaranteed them safety, non-discrimination, and equal rights. That’s when I became aware of their unofficial “Gay Days” and how Christians would show up from all over the country to protest them every year. Apparently my grandmother had been upset about these days for years, but my parents had just kind of ignored her.
Out of curiosity, I ended up reading one of the books my grandmother kept leaving at our house. And friends — it’s amazing how similar that (terrible, poorly written) rhetoric was to what people are saying these days. Disney hires gay pedophiles who want to abuse your children. Disney is trying to normalize Satanism in our beautiful, Christian America.
Just tons of conspiracy theories in there that ranged from “a few bad things happened that weren’t actually Disney’s fault, but they did happen” to “Pocahontas is an evil movie, not because it distorts history and misrepresents indigenous life, but because it might teach children respect for nature. Which, as we all know, would cause them all to become Wiccans who believe in climate change.”
Like — please, take it from someone who knows. This weird fight between fundies and Disney is not new. This is not Disney’s first (gay) rodeo. These people have always believed that Disney is full of evil gays who are trying to groom and sexually abuse children.
The main difference now is that these beliefs are becoming mainstream. It’s not just conservative pastors who are talking about this. It’s not just church groups showing up to boycott Gay Day. Disney is starting to (reluctantly) say the quiet part out loud, and so are the Republicans. Disney is publicly supporting queer rights and announcing company-supported queer events and the Republican Party is publicly calling them pedophiles and enacting politically driven revenge.
This is important, because while this fight has always been important in the history of queer rights, it is now being magnified. The precedent that a fight like this could set is staggering. For better or for worse, we live in a corporation-driven country. I don’t like it any more than you do, and I’m not about to defend most of Disney’s business practices. But we do live in a nation where rights are largely tied to corporate approval, and the fact that we might be entering an age where even the most powerful corporations in the country are being banned from speaking out in favor of rights for marginalized people… that’s genuinely scary.
Like… I’ll just ask you this. Where do you think we’d be now, in 2023, if Disney had been prevented from promising its employees equal benefits in 1994? That was almost thirty years ago, and look how far things have come. When I looked up news articles for this post from that era, even then journalists, activists, and fundie church leaders were all talking about how a company of Disney’s prominence throwing their weight behind this movement could lead to the normalization of equal protections in this country.
The idea of it scared and thrilled people in equal parts even then. It still scares and thrills them now.
I keep seeing people say “I need them both to lose!” and I get it, I do. Disney has for sure done a lot of shit over the years. But I am begging you as a queer exvangelical to understand that no. You need Disney to win. You need Disney to wipe the fucking floor with these people.
Right now, this isn’t just a fight between a giant corporation and Ron DeSantis. This is a fight about the right of corporations to support marginalized groups. It’s a fight that ensures that companies like Disney still can offer benefits that a discriminatory government does not provide. It ensures that businesses much smaller than Disney can support activism.
Hell, it ensures that you can support activism.
The fight between weird Christian conspiracy theorists and Disney is not new, because the fight to prevent any tiny victory for marginalized groups is not new. The fight against the normalization of othered groups is not new.
That’s what they’re most afraid of. That each incremental victory will start to make marginalized groups feel safer, that each incremental victory will start to turn the tide of public opinion, that each incremental victory will eventually lead to sweeping law reform.
They’re afraid that they won’t be able to legally discriminate against us anymore.
So guys! Please. This fight, while hilarious, is also so fucking important. I am begging you to understand how old this fight is. These people always play the long game. They did it with Roe and they’re doing it with Disney.
We have! To keep! Pushing back!
French people raised half a million. Half a fucking million for the family of the cop who murdered Nahel Merzouk, an Algerian boy.
Well we don’t know the value of an Algerian life in France but we sure now know the reward for killing one.
To all the French people who say France is not racist fuck you. To all the Europeans who pretend to be so much better than the US a huge fuck you. To all the people getting a hard on over France fuck you. To all the people who even think about mentioning how destroying public property is bad fuck you. Fuck everyone who is not revolted by what happened.
2 every former "weird kid" out there who still struggles with repressed self hatred as a coping mechanism, remember that it's totally okay to forgive that younger version of yourself. You didn't do anything to deserve the way you were treated, and no matter what you did then, you can always become a version of yourself that you like NOW ! : D or something liek that!!