✨SNURSHED✨

a compilation of my favorite pride & prejudice posts 😌

🐯 🐯 🐯

You know everyone is clamoring for Disney to go back to 2D animation, but what about Dreamworks?

I mean

This shit

was beautiful.

Here’s one good thing to come out of 2020:

Paleontologists completed a life-sized replica of Sue, the most complete T. Rex ever found.

And she is freaking GORGEOUS!

As I read more about this beauty, I found out some new details regarding things I thought I previously knew about the beast that was Tyrannosaurus Rex, and I’m going to share them with you.

First, and most obvious, her size:

This is nothing new, we all figured T. Rex was big, but I for one never stopped to consider exactly how big it was. Nobody ever really knows what to imagine when they read about something the size of a whale that walked around and ate everything it could kill. 

Speaking of eating things, I just want to remind you all that T. Rex had–by miles–the strongest bite of any terrestrial animal living or dead, somewhere around six and a half tons of force. That’s over six times greater than the current estimate of what Allosaurus was capable of, and three times what was delivered by the highest measured reading of the living title holder–the estuarine crocodile. It didn’t have to waste time swinging its head open-mouthed like Saurophaganax for a little extra oomph, or grow fancy serrated teeth like Carcharodontosaurus to cut pieces out of its prey. It opted for the simplest approach: get its mouth around something and crush it to death; imagine the full weight of an elephant on whatever was between this thing’s jaws.

“How did it find something to eat?” I hear you asking. “It can’t see something if it doesn’t move, right?”

Listen, I love Jurassic Park too, but that’s a big crock of shit.

Notice how both her eyes face forward. That gives her binocular vision (the ability to focus both eyes on one target, like you and I). More importantly it means she has impeccable depth perception due to overlapping fields of vision from each, large, eyeball. Researchers agree that T. Rex not only had incredible vision, but that it was probably better than most modern animals–including eagles, hawks, and owls–and that she could likely spot something three and a half miles away. If something that big can see that well, it doesn’t matter if you move or not, she’d be able to tell if it was an animal trying to hide or a piece of vegetation. So pray she isn’t hungry if she lays eyes on you. And even if by some miracle she didn’t see you, she’d still smell you. 

If she decided you looked tasty, you probably wouldn’t hear her coming as much as you’d feel her. Modern science indicates that T. Rex didn’t roar like in Jurassic Park, but rather bellowed or maybe even hissed like crocodilians. If she were on to you, you’d most likely feel this sense of unease creep up your spine as a low-pitched rumble in the air permeated through you. You wouldn’t know what it was or where it was coming from until you hear her footfalls. By then it’s too late–you could try to run but she’d probably catch you. There’s plenty on YouTube that reconstructs what T. Rex may have sounded like, and it’s legitimately haunting.  

To wrap all of this up, the one bit of good that came out of the cursed year that is 2020 is that this wonderful child of science and art came into the world, and reaffirmed my respect and admiration for the eight ton slab of muscle and teeth that is this magnificent creature.

…and it is nothing if not magnificent.

Who You Should Fight: Marching Band Edition

piccolo

who wins: them

don’t do it.  don’t fight the piccolo player.  just don’t.

flute

who wins: them

they were told you were challenging them for first chair. run while you still can.

clarinet

who wins: them

threaten you with their register key.  forfeit for the sake of all.

saxophone

who wins: them

you are promptly deemed a “nerd” and stuffed in a band locker by the entire section even though you only wanted to fight one of them.

low reeds

who wins: no one

 you yell increasingly bad sexual innuendos at each other across the band room for twenty minutes until you both get tired and go home.

mellophone

who wins: them

punches you in the face repeatedly on the offbeats of a sousa march playing in the background.

trumpet

who wins: you and then them

you win the fight easily while they’re giving their villainous monologue.  entire trumpet section later jumps you in a dark hallway for disgracing one of their own.

trombone

who wins: no one

they get distracted halfway through the fight and wander off.

low brass

who wins: them

you mock them by making farting noises with your lips.  they punch you in the stomach with their abnormally strong arms.  you can’t breath properly for days.

pit percussion

who wins: you

pretend like you can’t tell the vibes, marimba, and xylophone apart.  wait until they’re blind with rage, then run them over with the closest wheeled pit equipment.

drumline

who wins: them

show up to the fight with a shank fashioned out of a broken drum stick.  proceed to kick ass.

drum major

who wins: them

calls you to attention (you can’t disobey!) and then waits until you faint from exhaustion.

color guard

who wins: them

have you ever watched one of these fuckers on the field?  you’re screwed.

band director

who wins: them

just when you think you’ve won, they get up smiling and say “one more time!”

going to the store to buy some milk

horror of dracula 1958 // girlfriend by avril lavigne

Things guard and drumline bond over:

•talking smack about the band •drumline having to replay a part when guard messes up and guard having to have it played again because drumline messed it up •well taped things

MEGAN FOX Let’s Unpack That | InStyle

A wholesome video if ever there was one :P I play dead with Chica and she mlems me back to life!