Happy Birthday To My Bae Goddamn I Love Dat Ass

HAMZAHHHHH..

come home the kids miss you.🤗

So i just got Letterboxd and here's a couple of the Zombies 3 reviews that made me cackle

I love it when people know these movies are silly and campy and love them for because of it.

ZAMN.

oh hell yes!

Dec. 25, 2031

M.S

a/n : Merry Christmas to all those who celebrate 💝 My early gift to you as i’ll be inactive for the holidays. This is based off of one of the topics in podcast EP. 25. Enjoy

My eyes spring open at the sound of two pairs of feet padding against the hardwood floor down the hall outside of our bedroom, already smiling to myself as I roll over from my comfortable spot in bed and anticipate our kids arrival. I close my eyes again, biting back my grin to pretend I was fast asleep when I hear the bedroom door creak open further and giggling erupt throughout the room.

“Mom, mom! Get up! We need to go downstairs right now! Santa came!!” Our son runs to climb into the bed as he sits on top of me, shaking my arms while laughing and whining slightly. I pretend to flutter my eyes open slowly before sitting up and giggling with him,

“I know I know! Aren’t you so excited?” I egg him on, watching him nod rapidly before tugging at the sleeve of my shirt harder. My husbands groan caused me to turn my head in his direction, watching as our daughter had him in the same position our son had me in, shaking his shoulders violently and shouting at him to get up. I laugh as he makes eye contact with me, his eyes half lidded and full of drowsiness when a lazy grin appears on his lips. Nodding at our daughter and getting up.

“Okay, okay let’s go. No running down the stairs.” I say standing to my feet and rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, watching as they nod and race toward the stairs, slowing down and taking baby steps down like I asked. Their father and I following groggily behind them.

“No time to brush our teeth, huh?” Matt snickers, the amusement behind his morning voice evident as he grins at me, his hand finding my back while we make our way down the stairs.

“Who cares about brushing their teeth on Christmas?” I laugh, watching as the kids run to sit on the floor and wait for us to take our seat by them.

“Not you apparently, stinky.” He jokes, joining in on my laughter when my face scrunches up and my eyes narrow at him. Grabbing his chin with my fingers and pulling it down playfully.

“Mommmmm, Daaaad! Hurry!” Our daughter whines, practically buzzing from her spot on the floor as she waits for us to tell her which to open first.

“Guys, don’t you wanna check if Santa’s reindeers ate the carrots we left for them first?” Matt chimes, wiggling his eyebrows a bit in amusement as the kids faces light up even more, gasps leaving their lips when they rise to their feet once again and race toward the kitchen to check, us following behind while laughing.

“Why do I have to eat the carrots?” Matt whines, the crunching from his chewing making me shush him as the kids finally went to bed at 11pm.

“Because we ate all the other cookies and only left one for Santa. Aka, Me.” I whisper, saving him the last bite of the cookie as I feed it to him. He hums, reaching for the glass of milk our son had poured and gulping it.

“Matt!” I whisper shout, “Not all of it??” His eyebrows raise. “What do you mean? Santa is probably thirsty after all that travelling?” He puts the empty cup back on the counter and turns to me with his hands on his hips. I bite back a giggle as I stare at him, a half eaten carrot in his hand and milk on his lip. I step towards him and grab his face, swiping my thumb over his lip prior to pressing a short kiss to his lips that he intends to prolong before i pull away to look up at him with a cheesy smile.

“I love being able to do this with you.” I watch as his pupils dilate and his eyes soften in admiration despite the dimness of our kitchen, he empties his hands and wipes them off before leaning closer and wrapping them around me. His chin resting atop of my head as i reciprocate his actions, rubbing his back in slow circles while his heartbeat thumps clearly in my ear.

“Merry Christmas, y/n.”

jj who got bitchy!kook!reader to crumble…and is a smug bastard about it.

jj had been pestering you for a very, very long time. constantly teasing mocking, and poking fun at you — always having a remark locked and loaded for whatever snarky, sassy comment you gave him that day.

for a pogue, he handled your attitude well. perhaps pogues just handle it better, as you’ve never met a kook boy who hasn’t called you psycho bitch with a big mouth.

the relentless mockery and vulgar flirting from jj, along with the lingering touches and downright gropes he gave you left you in a state you knew damn well you shouldn’t be in.

you often found yourself thinking about him late at night, and in most those cases, whilst your hand was stuffed into your victoria secret panties.

it was another one of those nights, playing with your own pussy until it was left sticky and throbbing, moaning jj’s name to your empty room. you had become sick of your pathetic excuse of an orgasms by your own hands, trotting your way over to jj’s house at gone midnight.

you were at his door, clearly disgusted by the actual state of the cut — and jj’s house, but feeling your own arousal, causing your panties to stick to you, it was the very least of your concerns.

which is how you ended up right here, in playboy pogues bed, getting your cunt absolutely drilled by him, his hand flat between your shoulder blades and forcing your chest to the mattress.

“this is all you needed, huh? just needed someone to fuck all that bitchiness outta you.” he drawled from behind you, amused at your slightly dazed look.

despite your loud, pornograhic moans bouncing off the walls as jj fucked you like the world would end tomorrow — you still had something to say.

“f-fuck you, pogue. this — this doesn’t mean shit.” You spat, reaching back to scratch your neatly manicured nails against his forearm.

he gave a deep chuckle, rumbling from deep in his chest as he grabbed your hips, yanking you closer, thrusting somehow deeper, hitting that spot your fingers or stupid frat kooks couldn’t ever hit.

“the sounds you’re makin’ say different, mama.” he commented, listening to your loud, borderline yelps as he pounded into you, hands gripping your hips tight enough to leave fingerprint bruises.

“g-god, you’re so full of yourself.” you hissed, and he leant down, snaking a large arm around your neck and pulling you to his chest tightly, other hand wandering from your hip to the bulge in your lower abdomen — pressing down on it with a smirk.

“nah, i think you’re the one full of me.”

hi! can you write one where johnnie is dating a coquette girlie who loves makeup? thank youuuu 🎀🍒🧸🤍

Polar Opposites

Summary: Headcanons about Johnnie dating a girl who is the polar opposite of himself ⋆ ˚｡⋆౨ৎ˚

Warnings: A few suggestive/sexy mentions

A/N: Why is this idea soooooo cute omg :')

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*

౨ৎ you quite literally treat johnnie like your personal barbie, doing his makeup, putting him in cute outfits, and painting his nails. he secretly adores it

౨ৎ johnnie loves to take you on shopping sprees. he thinks it's adorable when your eyes light up and you get so excited over new products

౨ৎ at first, he wasn't sure about how life would look with someone so different than him, but he's grown to love your sunshiney personality and aesthetic

౨ৎ decorating your first apartment together is definitely a challenge. johnnie always wants to make you happy, though, so he agrees to let you decorate the home however you like

౨ৎ he has learned a lot about his own makeup by watching beauty youtubers with you

౨ৎ johnnie never thought he would ever say pink was his favorite color until he saw you in a hot pink lingerie set from victoria's secret

౨ৎ speaking of which, despite the overabundance of pink and heavy floral perfume, victoria's secret has topped hot topic as johnnie's favorite store. he loves picking out new sets for you to wear

౨ৎ my boyfriend does my makeup youtube challenges!

౨ৎ johnnie is always willing to stand up for you if someone is rude or thinks you're incompetent because of your feminine looks

౨ৎ bows everywhere! in his hair, in your hair, on your and his stuffed animals, you name it

౨ৎ over time, pink becomes johnnie's favorite color...just because it makes you happy and he loves seeing his girl happy 💞🎀

This might actually be me running on 2hrs of sleep

cute things i'd like to experience with the person i like ꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ ♡‧₊˚ ♡

him liking me back

another wednesday vlog another night of me screaming into my pillow bc matt isn’t my boyfriend

matt collaborating with prada was a huge step and a wonderful achievement. it blows my mind that half of you are brushing this under the rug like it's not a huge deal and making fun of matt when he looks nothing short of amazing. and the fact you guys think matt would spend almost 6k on a prada outfit for a fucking april fools prank is ridiculous. that just goes to show how little you really know them like yes they make money but they are extremely humble about their work and dress like any other normal civillian. they dont just go throwing their money around for shits and giggles. like how old are you guys...? grow uppp seriously.