Okay So I Recently Watched OFMD Season 1 And I Just Kept Constantly Hearing Ed's Laugh In My Ears Until

I am so tired

Can someone explain how this app fucking works?

I am SICK AND TIRED OF SEEING POSTS ABOUT STRANGER THINGS

What can I do to stop it? I can't skip them

Why the fuck did tumblr decide that i want to see anything about this show

God have mercy on my poor mind

Right now I realized yet again that I don't really know whom could I write about being nervous or anything. I don't really communicate with people from my university group. And noone else can understand what is going on. I don't want to make people worried or also nervous about things I am worried about.

I just thought again that this "I don't hit women rule" is shit. It only means "I won't hit you until I'm really angry as hell because I think you're weak and I prefer to use my anger to hurt people physically". It just means that you're not that good in controlling yourself. People must be treated with respect no matter if they are or aren't strong enough to hit you back. It says "women are weak" and "I am quick to judge and get physical" at once. Why do you think that being fragile must be what stops you from being aggressive?

This thought is not complete but it is important.

So I saw people talk about grey star jacket that Ed's wearing on the picture with Jackie.

And when I watched analysis of the trailer I noticed that Buttons is wearing the same jacket (and i didn't see anyone talking about it). So it might be a uniform or they were wearing the same thing at different points of time.

Also we saw Stede wearing a red cravat. And some people assumed it was Ed's cloth (maybe I'm wrong and I just thought that for a moment).

But I noticed that during the fight scene the guy who was punched by Stede is wearing a similar cravat.

Oh my goodness

hey remember when taika posted this

I hope good things happen in 2025. I wish I would find a friend. I wish interesting things would happen.

I wish. For that. Which is unrealistic and dumb. Wow. I'm not going to say what it is.

A friend. Please. God, please. It's like I didn't ever try. It's not my fault I don't like them. I shouldn't take up someone's time if I don't like them.

What should I do?

I see myself having a family eventually. Not now though. I can't spend a lot of time with people, it's tiring. I am so peaceful right now during quarantine.

This makes me wonder if I will ever feel sourceful (if you can say it like these) to have someone for a long time in my life. Especially children. Will I ever feel like I won't be completely out of energy after just some time?

Life isn't a period of time. It feels more like a moment. I don't really understand how I am this old already and how I will become older. And i will feel the same way from the inside when I will be older. I will just be in the moment. Not in the 'live in the moment' way but in a 'remembering or planning doesn't feel real' way. And other people are the same.

This doesn't feel real. At all.

God

I feel so goddamn lonely

And lost

And tired

I guess it's good that I'm not in a relationship bc it would be shitty for the other person

But i wish i had a really close friend

Idk, somehow relationships always seem like putting a lot on the other person and i just don't want to burden them

Good god i feel like this permanent feeling of this huge burden will kill me

Even though nothing really hard is happening anymore

And I really miss my ex even though i don't feel like i could make myself rely on him bc of feeling guilty for burdening

My mind is a mess

I feel really unhappy.