I Just Found The Funniest Font Ever

how to get a job. please. glue no borax.

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First half of chapter 1 under the cut;

Peter looked at me with wide eyes. He was breathing fast, jerkily, and by the time I processed what had happened, he was half-way to a full-blown panic attack. “April,” he gasped, breaths coming out sporadically, “April, what the fuck are we going to do?”

I was staring at my hands, eyes blank. They were flickering in and out of visibility, my mind and body apparently unable to decide if I should hide or not. The alleyway we were in - that we were deposited in - was dark, looming, and before I had realised it, my spider-sense had warned me of the person at the mouth of it. If I hadn’t been so out of it, if Peter hadn’t been occupied with his panic attack, we would’ve heard them long before they got there.

“Hey! Brats! Scram, get out of here! This is my turf and I’m not having you lot stay here!” He looked angry, and drunk, and ironically this is what got me out of my fugue state, what helped Peter calm down a little. Getting dropped into an unrecognisable alleyway had shaken us, but it seemed that drunk, angry people were always around, no matter what dimension you got dropped in.

That thought almost had me disassociating again, before I got a firm grip on myself. Get yourself into a place where you can panic properly first before you have a mental breakdown I thought.

A plan was what I needed, and even the bare bones of what I had calmed me down somewhat. I turned to Peter, who although had snapped out of his panic attack by virtue of the drunk, wasn’t faring well. “Peter. Hey, Pete. We need to move.” Grabbing his hands, I let just the bare bones of my strength leak through, helping to ground him in the moment.

I could imagine what he was thinking - what his mind must have conjured for him to look so broken. I cursed Dr. Strange for the hundredth time in my mind, if only for the fact that the magic that had thrown us here had us feeling like we had dematerialised into ash.

Yeah. I’m sure you know what memory Peter was reliving.  I hauled myself up, and still grabbing his hand, dragged him out of there.

We stumbled out of the alleyway, and into the main road - if you could call it that. It was dark, and the pollution was thick, but it couldn’t hide the gothic architecture or the grimy cityscape. The buildings loomed, dark shadows cast over the street. There were neon signs out every couple of buildings, but they flickered half-heartedly, the light dying intermittently. It was as though even the inanimate objects here were warning us to leave.

Peter was still shaking, his breaths uneven, and when I looked back at him he looked haunted. But I had the brief thought that at least he was moving - at least he wasn’t stuck in that seedy alley. More alert than I was before, my spider-sense tingled at the base of my head, a constant hum that never dimmed - warning me to not let down my guard.

My eyes flickered over the faces of people, their heads down. They walked like they were afraid of getting jumped, wary looks given to me before they hurried away. My thoughts were bitter as person after person looked at me, took a glance at Peter, and lowered their eyes before they walked off.

My faith in humanity died a little at that point.

I tightened my grip on Peter a little, trying to convey some semblance of reassurance. His tight hold on me tightened further, and I flashed him a quick smile when he looked at me. My smile was weak, fleeting, but it seemed to be enough to ground Peter a little more.

We kept walking, aimlessly, it felt but we needed to find somewhere to regroup. To think. It felt like hours, but was maybe only 45 minutes before Peter was tugging at me to stop.

“April, look.” I looked over to what he was pointing at - a small sign that was innocuous and easily passed over. ‘Narrows Shelter’ it read, and I looked over at the building. It looked - clean for a lack of description. It was by no means the Ritz, but it was a far cry better than what I’d seen so far in this depressing city. It wasn’t much but it was something.

I nodded at him, and we hurried over, hoping to find somewhere to sleep for the night. We walked through the doors, and the inside of the lobby matched the outside. The place was clean, and although it looked run-down, I knew that it was our best shot at the moment. Remembering the seedy bars that the neon signs advertised, I shivered a little and prayed that we got something right today.

The Universe owed us.

Wait.

That thought had me spiralling again, the thought that I was in a different dimension. A different UNIVERSE.

By the time I had checked back in, fingernail indents carved into my hands, I could hear the tail end of the conversation that Peter had with the receptionist.

“Room 3B. Keep your heads down and don’t cause trouble.” She sounded brusque, but not unkind.

I could feel a hysterical laugh bubble up at the back of my throat, threatening to come out. Us? Keep out of trouble?

Peter gave me a look, correctly identifying the look in my eye. I swallowed it down, thanked the lady, and we made our way to the back of the shelter. The room was small, with 2 small cots and a window that was so dirty it let in barely any light. But the room was clean, the beds looking not bad. It felt like a sanctuary compared to the streets outside.

Peter sank onto one of the cots, and I followed him, my hand still grasped firmly in his. “We’ll figure this out Pete. We always do.” I laid my head on his shoulder, and felt as he nodded above me.

“Yeah,” he sighed heavily, but I could hear some hesitation in his voice. “April what if we– what if we can’t find a way back?”

I stayed silent, doubt nagging at me. What platitudes could I say when that thought had been running in my mind?

I’d assumed that when I was able to find somewhere to rest – somewhere for my mind to shut down – that I’d have the panic attack I was pushing back. But I just … disassociated. I couldn’t compartmentalise what had happened and my body felt – floaty. I was in a haze, and I didn’t want to go back to the panic-filled haze that my mind had been in before.

I could just – relax. Let everything drop, if only for a minute, and if my hands were trembling, if my glassy eyes held tears, then I didn’t make note of it.

The shelter helped with that. It was quiet, the background sounds muted; footsteps, murmured conversations, the occasional cough. It was a lot louder to me than to the average person – and I think that was what had ultimately grounded me; the fact that my enhanced senses still worked in this hellhole, that I hadn’t lost my powers.

 I refused to think about what I could hear outside the shelter.

“We can think of a plan later, Pete,” I said eventually. I looked up at him, and I could see the exhaustion on him. “Let’s try to go to sleep first.”

He looked down at me, and his eyes softened with an emotion I couldn’t identify. “Ok April,” he said.

We settled into our respective cots, exhaustion laying us down like a heavy blanket. We lay there for a while, and drifted off after a bit. The last thing I could remember before I fell asleep was the dizzying relief I felt in the fact that Peter was with me. That the spell hadn’t careened out of order, and separated us.

i literally love tim’s mind and how his mind connects dots SO EASILY. like he looked at ohn and his glitching, and instead of thinking it was an isolated incident, due to him being a scientist/mutant he went “yep. Yep. Peters got this too. Gotta let em know” and in the same convo told them. I think it’s the communication? Like how he communicated this pretty easily with Dick and Peter that’s making my brain go “brrrr FINALLY GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS”

it drives me up the wall when things that should be talked about immediately aren't,,, especially considering that in real life, the first thing you would do in that situation is go to someone you trust and say "dude you are not gonna believe what just happened" and then would try to tell them everything from the beginning to now. it's different when it's an insecurity or when someone is actively avoiding talking about something, but i try to clear up emotional issues as fast as they happen. because miscommunication is only fun when it adds to the story and doesn't make you want to tear your hair out

Did anyone else get a gross, slimy feeling when watching the bathroom scene in Confrontation where Marinette and Sabrina revealed how the mirror was actually a two way mirror allowing anyone to see inside, or how there were microphones recording everything happening inside?

Or how Marinette admitted to making the usual bathroom "out-of-service" so she could tamper with the temporary bathroom? Granted, we never see inside the potentially vandalized bathroom, only her putting up the sign, though if the school needed to build the temporary bathroom, there's enough evidence in the episode to suggest Marinette caused serious damage in order to carry out her plan.

Out of morbid curiosity, I searched up the prison sentence for recording in a public bathroom and found this from "prisonguide.co.uk". Before anyone comments, I know the UK and Paris are different places with different laws, this is just to show how scummy the whole scheme was from my perspective.

Warning, slight mention of voyeurism ahead. Nothing major but I'll warn you just in case.

Typical Sentences for Voyeurism Offences

Generally, offenders may face up to two years in prison. However, sentences can be more severe if the offence is aggravated by factors such as the victim being a minor or if the act involved recording and distributing images or videos.

Reading this over, I don't understand why the writers made the Main Character of a show aimed at children commit a crime this serious and damaging, and ultimately be rewarded by the narrative. Remember, this is how she defeats Lila, with Chloe following a few episodes later.

It's appalling how this made it past the drawing board. I know the writers wanted Marinette to expose Lila to everyone in an "epic, you go queen, girlboss" way, but did they have to choose such a scummy method of doing so?

Also, isn't Sabrina the daughter of a Police Officer? Shouldn't she know recording someone in the bathroom -a place where privacy is expected - is a crime?

Dumbledore as a Mentor

Dumbledore is the most well executed mentor figure for Harry in the series, for two reasons.

First is what he represents. Since the very beginning of the series, he trusts him absolutely, and is along with the Weasleys the only adult with whom he shares that title. But Harry trusts Dumbledore even though he doesn't know anything about him. Harry, who has a pathological mistrust of adults, always feels that he can rely on him. He's the only wizard that Voldemort ever feared, and his very presence at Hogwarts makes it so that there is at least one place which Harry knows is safe.

And then he's killed. Just before the final book, before the last confrontation Harry and the Dark Lord will have, the man whom Harry though he could most rely on dies. The warm blanket of comfort and safety that Dumbledore provided is suddenly gone, and Harry must face Voldemort as his own man, no mentors to guide and protect him. His final challenge. "The last and greatest of his protectors had died, and he was more alone than he had ever been before" Of course, there was another protector left still, but Harry didn't know that at the time.

Dumbledore is also unique among Harry Potter characters in that he's the one who most understands the Harry Potter settings supernatural elements.

Fantasy and supernatural are not the same. Fantasy is when things that would not be possible in our world, indeed, what in the real world would be classified as supernatural, are mundane elements of the setting, as real and part of nature as anything else. Magic, dragons, spells, potions and house elves and all, is part of the nature of the world. They are not considered supernatural elements for wizards, the way they are for muggles. Supernatural elements are those that surpass what is perceived as natural in any given setting. Harry Potter as a series has both, and Dumbledore is the only character who truly understands them.

What am I talking about? Mainly (though not exclusively) Love, capital L. In Harry Potter, Love, unconditional, true, Love is more than just an emotion. It has magical reality, it tangibly affects the world. While it falls under the umbrella of magic, It is the most mysterious and least understood of the magics. It is ancient, and powerful beyond belief. It is what made Harry's mind agony for the Dark Lord to touch. What permitted Dumbledore to trust Snape absolutely (and if you want a more detailed analysis of how Love and Snape are fundamentally intertwined, and how his arc is among the most important in telling the message Rowling wanted to tell, read this meta by rex-luscus), what allowed Harry to survive the unstoppable Killing curse, when no one had ever done it before.

Most powerful mentor figures in fiction teach the protagonist powerful spells and magic. It's expected. After all, in most stories, the hero defeats the villain by growing to match them in power. Not so in Harry Potter. Harry, while a powerful wizard, and very talented in DADA, is nothing out of this world. He never approaches Voldemort's league. Whenever his killing curse fails, it is by supernatural mechanisms, that Voldemort cannot fathom but that neither fully understand. Lily's protection. Priori Incantatem. The supernatural phenomenon of the magical world. In both these scenarios, the first to understand what truly happened and explain is Dumbledore. In their private sessions, Dumbledore never teaches Harry powerful spells, or Potions, as many would expect him to (that role is left to other mentors of his, mainly Lupin and Snape). He teaches him philosophy, how to understand the mind of Tom Riddle, and about the nature of magic itself as a phenomenon. He teaches him wisdom, to understand the world. That's why, when Harry comes into his own, it is no surprise that he defeats him by understanding, on a deeper level, the Deathstick. Another of the myths and legends of the magical world, that is nonetheless real. When Voldemort casts at Harry his third and last killing curse, he dies, with only Harry understanding why. He has learned all that Dumbledore wanted to teach him. He has taught him to be wise.

Voldemort's main flaw is that magic only has value to him in so much as it is a tool that he can bring under his control to increase his power. He views it almost like a scientific discipline. And in those areas, the non supernatural ones, he is unrivalled. Dumbledore is at most his equal, but probably not. When they fight, they are evenly matched, even though Dumbledore has the Elder Wand. Dumbledore acknowledges him as the most brilliant student that Hogwarts has ever seen, a tacit admission that he is his superior. And yet, Dumbledore is the greatest sorcerer to ever live. Why? Because he understands the mysteries of magic, knows that magic is a fundamentally supernatural force. Voldemort opened his mind to the power of magic, but could not see what lay beyond. His mind remained shackled, and he never did understand magic beyond what is conceivable by science. Dumbledore did, and that's why he's the only one he ever feared. And it's what makes him the perfect mentor for Harry.

Masterpost: How to write a story?

Compilation of writing advice for some aspects of the writing process.

How to motivate myself to write more

How to get rid of writer’s block

Basic Overview: How to write a story

How to outline a story

How to come up with plot

How to create a character

How to make a character unique

How to name your characters (Masterpost)

How to start a story

How to write a prologue

How to write conversation

How to write witty banter

How to write the last line

How to write a summary

How to write a book description

How to write romance

How to write friendships

How to write emotions (Masterpost)

How to write an argument

How to write yelling

How to write anger

How to write betrayal

How to title fanfiction

How to write an unreliable narrator

First Person vs. Third Person POV

How to write character deaths

How to use songs in a fanfiction

How to name fictional things

How to write self-insert fics

How to write multiple points of view

Introducing a group of characters

Large cast of characters interacting in one scene

How to write dual timelines

Redemption arc

Plot twists

Fatal Character Flaws

Good Traits Gone Bad (x)

Slow burn

Explanation posts about writing terms

What is…

AU ideas

Favourite tropes

Tropes of the day

List of Genres

Drabble vs. One-Shot

Advice for writing relationships

Masterpost: how to write relationships + romance

More specific scenarios

How to write a bilingual character

How to write a character with glasses

How to write heterochromia

How to create a villain

Reasons for becoming a villain

How to write a morally grey character

How to write an inferiority complex

How to write a road trip

How to create and write a cult

How to write amnesia

How to write being stabbed

How to write a stratocracy

How to write a heist

How to write the mafia

Criminal past comes to light

Ideas for traumatic experiences

How to create an atmosphere (Masterpost)

How to write a college party

How to write royalty (Masterpost)

Paramilitary Forces/ Militia

Superpowers Masterpost (Hero x Villain)

Inconvenient things a ghost could do

A Queen’s Assassination Plot

Crime Story - Detective’s POV

Evil organization of assassins

Evil wins in the end

Causes for the apocalypse

Last day on earth

Liminal Spaces

Workplace AUs

Signs of co-dependency

What to wear in a desert

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So... I found this and now it keeps coming to mind. You hear about "life-changing writing advice" all the time and usually its really not—but honestly this is it man.

I'm going to try it.

o/ <- person waving

o7 <- person saluting

ol <- person raising hand

o1 <- person scratching head

\o> <- person stretching

Adrien The Liar

wait. don’t go. I promise this isn’t salt. I have not been hacked. It’s me.

Hear me out.

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latest chapter of dark matter omggg i loved it >.<