Clumsy Mistakes

May I request the reader being childe’s younger sibling in their teen years and ends up falling into the abyss while he’s off in Liyue

what happened to you?

# — characters: gender neutral reader, childe/ajax, skirk, zhongli, aether, lumine, kaeya, albedo

# — summary: you're not the same person ajax left behind.

# — warnings: blood/fighting/injury mentions

# — tags: hc/drabble format, egregious canon divergence, angst, fluff ??, abyss prince aether, kaeya and albedo are associated with the abyss, traveler lumine

# — notes: when i saw this req, i got so fucking excited, you have no idea. this is so cool to think about, holy shit. when i say i sat here and wrote this for hours, i mean it very very seriously. also, if it wasn't already obvious, i have a thing for making the reader strong, so this is really up my alley. anyways, as always, reblogs are appreciated and i'd love to know what you think about this! i hope you enjoy!

# — tag list: @marius-z @sxnnyserene @favonius-captain @the-gayest-sky-kid @chichikoi

want to join the tag list?

✧ — 🐋 — ✧

it's actually not specified just how many older siblings childe has, but it is known that he has some

so let's say for the sake of this post that you were born after ajax

the gap between you two isn't very large -- he's in his very early twenties and you're in your late teens -- but it's enough to make a difference

he treats you almost the same as he treats tonia, teucer, and anthon, and no matter how much you tell him to stop, he just .. won't

don't get me wrong, ajax is an amazing older brother

it's just that he has this habit of treating you like a little kid

you followed closely at his heels when you two were a bit younger

you looked up to him despite him being a timid boy, because though he was timid, he was ambitious

even before he became a fighter, he vowed to protect you by any means necessary

so, onto the abyss.

when ajax returned after being missing for three days, you tried to cling to him as you usually did, but a simple glance at him told you everything you needed to know about him

whoever it was that came out of that forest... wasn't your brother.

something was missing in your brother's eyes when he came home that day -- something important. you didn't notice it at first, but you were still the first to notice something was wrong.

when he ran away with nothing but a bag of bread and a shortsword, you shared in your mother's grief, even at the age of 10. with snezhnaya's unforgiving weather, you were sure that you would stumble across ajax's frozen body within a day. your father was on a trip somewhere far away, and your mother was too busy tending to your lively home to set out to search for her son herself.

"we just have to wait," your mother told you, her face swollen from crying for hours. she loved each and every one of you more than she loved herself; if something happened to any one of you, it would surely break her down. you wept with your mother as she cradled you in her arms. "by the grace of the cryo archon, he'll return." she whispered.

you, like many other snezhnayans, trusted in the cryo archon's judgement, even if she was merciless at times. you said silent prayers for two nights, hoping that she would answer.

when dawn broke on the third day, you truly thought the tsaritsa heard your desperate pleas.

you were the first one awake that morning. you often climbed into bed with ajax since you had frequent nightmares and a horrid fear of the dark, but without him there to fight off the terrors of the night, you couldn't sleep very well. you quietly trudged around your house with your favorite blanket draped across your shoulders. mornings were quiet in your house, even if there were so many of you living there.

you gazed tiredly out the window at the snowy terrain. you remembered your mother's words about waiting and rested your head on the cool windowpane. you would have given anything to see your brother walk out from the forest in the distance, safe and sound.

apparently, you didn't have to give a thing. movement in the distance caught your eye and you squinted, straining your eyes to try and make out the features of the stranger. as they got closer, you pick up the faint image of a familiar shortsword.

it's him. it had to be. you were sure of it.

not caring if you were wrong, you shed your blanket and flung open the door, your face aching with how wide your smile was. "ajax!" you screamed at the person.

they halted in their tracks at the sound of the same and waited for a few seconds before they picked up the pace, sprinting towards you. once they got a little closer, you noticed the familiar head of orange hair and ran to meet them halfway, your bare feet sinking into the snow.

your mother and siblings came running down the stairs behind you, afraid that something had happened to you, but stilled themselves when they saw you tackling your brother into a crushing hug, the two of you collapsing into the snow with loud laughter.

"we were so worried about you!" you cried, your arms tightening around your brother. he was still laughing. "why did you leave us?"

ajax pushed himself up and took you along with him, hoisting you into his arms as he started towards the house. you yelped at the swift movement and wrapped your legs around him. "i wanted to explore by myself for a while," he said, his hand patting your back. "i scared you, didn't i?"

you nodded quickly. "mhm! more than the monsters under the bed!"

ajax made a soft sound. "that's no good. i'm sorry. i'll make it up to you when we get inside, okay? let's get you warmed up first."

your entire family doted on ajax all day when you two got inside. you all treated him to his favorite foods and games while your mother inspected him for injuries despite his insistence that she stop.

that should have been the warning sign.

when the day ended and everyone returned to their rooms to head to sleep, you and ajax stayed on the living room floor and talked about his time away. you told him about how you tried to be a big kid with him gone -- how you tried and failed to fight off any monsters that may have been lurking in your room. ajax patted your head with an apologetic smile.

"i'll crush those monsters for you tonight, okay?" he said.

at first you were excited to agree, but as you looked at your brother with the same starry eyes you always did, you found that something was.. off.

maybe it was the wording of his promise that tipped you off. he sounded far too enthusiastic about the idea of fighting off non-existent monsters. you knew very well that there were no monsters in your room; you were just afraid of the dark. it made you feel better to think there were so you could pretend to beat them up and conquer your fears. if you were both aware that this nightly monster hunt was a game, why did he look so excited by the idea of a battle?

you stared at ajax for a little while longer, trying to figure out if you were just making stuff up because you were scared. once you were in panic mode, it was hard to not see everything as some sort of monster. ajax was always the exception to that feeling.

or at least, he used to be.

you nodded and made an excuse about having to use the bathroom, scurrying up the stairs as quickly as your feet could manage. your breathing began to pick up as you recalled what you saw -- or more precisely, what you didn't see -- in your brother's eyes.

the two of you were beneath the ceiling lights.

then why couldn't you see the lights reflected in his eyes?

ajax wasn't stupid. he picked up on your sudden fear of him right away that day.

he found it odd, though, that you didn't behave as though you were afraid of him.

there was a wall between you two that wasn't there before, but every so often you would reach across it, even when he caused trouble and started unnecessary fights.

your relationship mended itself over time because of his gratitude.

you were the only member of the family who knew of his early promotion to harbinger status. you disagreed with his way of life, but you tried not to treat him any different.

ajax was a different person altogether, and yet you still tried to accept that new person as your brother.

ajax, now childe, revises his vow:

to protect you and your light at all costs.

he did what he could to protect you, even from afar when he was sent to liyue. you exchanged letters with him that were separate from the ones he sent to the family

he would detail his plans and his complaints, and send you special gifts recommended by this zhongli person he met.

he tells you via letter one day that he met a fascinating blonde traveler. from a moment's glance, he knew she would be the perfect sparring partner and he told you as such

but towards the end, he tells you how much he thinks you would like her.

she was a lot like you, apparently.

so naturally, you decide that you have to meet her. crazy as your brother may be, it's not every day that you hear about ajax being so amazed by someone who wasn't the tsaritsa

you pack your stuff and sneak away in the night, making your way to the harbor by taking a shortcut through the forest

unfortunately, you ended up taking a very, very, VERY long detour.

when you come to, you immediately realize that there's a gap in your memory.

you remember tucking away ajax's last letter to you under your pillow; you remember walking through the forest to get to the docks; you remember being startled so badly by a passing deer that you slipped.

after that...

your body enters survival mode in an instant as you take in your surroundings. you were a smooth, ebony marble floor and as you look around, you notice that the rest of this room -- this castle -- was made of a similar material. you appear to be in a dark throne room of sorts; there was some obvious wear and damage that tainted the room, but there was an undeniable elegance in the obsidians, navys, golds, and silvers that made up the room.

how did you end up in a castle, of all places? did you fall and hit your head so hard that you fell into a coma? were you just dreaming? what throne room would be in the middle of the forest?

"another one?" a voice comes from in front of you, where the throne is. you blink rapidly when you actually see a blonde man in strange clothing sitting there. he wasn't there before, was he? you were alone a second ago.

"do the people of teyvat only know how to stare?" he scoffs at you, crossing one leg over the other. "what happened to common greetings?"

the blonde stranger has eyes that match the golden plating of his clothes, you notice. they burn holes through you as they seem to glow brighter in the dark atmosphere. he's suddenly joined by two other men; one with long blue hair and an eyepatch, and another with ashy light blonde hair and teal eyes so bright, you almost feel the need to shield your eyes. the newcomers stand on opposite sides of the throne, each of them assuming different postures.

"with all due respect," the man with teal eyes speaks. his voice is smooth and quiet. "the people of teyvat are not used to circumstances like this."

the blonde in the throne clicks his tongue impatiently. "then why do they put themselves in said circumstances?" his eyes haven't left yours for a second. you're too shell-shocked to speak; it must show on your face, because the blonde outlander raises an eyebrow at you, a small smirk forming when he sees you back away. "cute. they're afraid of me."

you struggle to find your voice. "wh-who," you swallow dryly, "who are you people? where am i? how did i get here?"

the blue-haired man leans on the throne nonchalantly. "my, my," he croons, "so many questions, and you've only just arrived here, little one." he chuckles when you visibly shudder at the sound of his voice. "i think we ought to introduce ourselves, no?"

the man with teal eyes hums in agreement. "i think that'd be best. we need to appear less threatening if we want them to start talking."

you make a small squeaking sound. what were they going to do to you if you didn't talk? thanks to your years of being around ajax, you picked up on his ability to read environments very well. this new place is terrifying and reeks of ancient death, but the men before you seem completely harmless, though that does little to soothe you. you were an intruder in their eyes, and only the archons know what they might do to an intruder like you.

you squeeze your eyes shut, fearing the worst. you just wanted to see your brother again -- wanted to see how happy he was in liyue. you didn't ask for all this. you just wanted to go home.

"it's been a while since someone's come down here." a woman's voice comes from behind you, scaring you enough to make you yelp out loud. her voice is rich and rough around the edges. she chuckles as you scoot backwards on the floor in an attempt to stay away from her. "we got ourselves a scaredy-cat this time, your highness."

your highness?!

you whirl back around to look at the blonde man in the chair. the white accents of his clothes and jewelry glow in response to the title. he was royalty? your stomach drops as your brain reminds you of what happens to people who disrespect those of such high standing.

"enough, skirk." the prince orders. "don't give them the wrong idea."

the woman -- skirk, apparently -- shrugs and walks towards the throne. "fine, fine." when she gets to where the prince and the other two men are, she shifts her weight onto one leg as she examines you from afar. her eyes suddenly light up with recognition. "say, kid; you wouldn't happen to be related to an 'ajax', would you?"

you feel the blood drain from your face. "h-how do you know my brother's name?"

skirk laughs. "i knew you looked familiar! say, how is he these days? i've been meaning to kick his ass again someday, but he never visits."

the prince snorts. "you'd prefer if people fell in this hellhole more often?"

"eh, it keeps me on my toes."

"how," you raise your voice abruptly, "how do you know my brother? answer me!"

you're not sure where you got the confidence to speak to these strangers with such force, but as time passes, you realize that you're cornered. each of these people possess so much raw power that you can almost taste it; even if you stayed quiet, you'd be no closer to escaping this place unscathed. so, you figure you may as well get as many answers as you can before they kill you.

you feel yourself break into a cold sweat at the thought of dying here. you were going to die alone -- your family has no idea that you left home and ajax thinks you're still at home, helping your mother around the house. none of them would know that you ended up here. ajax, anthon, tonia, teucer... none of them would know a thing. tears sting your eyes but you blink them away.

skirk makes an impressed noise. "your brother wasn't as brave as you, y'know." she praises. "he tried to act all tough in the beginning, but i heard him crying himself to sleep for like, a week. but you... you've got guts. i like it."

you give skirk your dirtiest scowl and feel exasperation build when she smiles at you. ajax ended up here when he went missing all those years ago? well, it was no wonder he came back a different person; these people were fucking insane. he's lucky he was able to fight and survive for so long.

skirk's words replay in your head. did she say ajax was here for a week? but that doesn't make any sense. he was only gone for three days.

"what is this place?" you ask after a moment.

"and that," the prince suddenly stands, "is where i come in. i think we should get on with these introductions, don't you?"

"what?" you blurt. "b-but you didn't answer my--"

the blonde ignores you. he introduces himself as aether. "currently, i'm in charge of whatever is left of this place. this," he points to the man with teal eyes, "is albedo. this man here is kaeya," he points at the man with blue hair, "and this--"

skirk holds up a hand, cutting aether off. you wonder why she hasn't been punished for her insolence yet. "i think i'll do a proper introduction later." she says, her eyes locked on yours. "believe it or not, we have some history together."

aether nods understandingly and makes his way over to you. when he takes a knee a little ways away to look at you at eye level, you belatedly realize that you've been on the floor this whole time. your face warms with shame; you're making a prince kneel because you're too weak to stand on your own.

now that he's closer, though, you notice how... kind his face really is. from this distance, his eyes look less like blinding lights and remind you more of the sun. you almost start to feel warm under his gaze. why was he looking at you like that now when he looked like he wanted to kill you a little while ago?

"you must be scared out of your mind, huh?" aether asks. he's lowered his tone for you. when you don't back away from him, you see the ghost of a smile appear on his face. "i'm sorry about earlier. we have to put up a front if we want people to respect us if and when they show up here."

"who wouldn't respect a prince like you?"

aether's laugh is low and mirthless. "you'd be surprised. here, if you want respect, you have to earn it by any means necessary. we test any intruders by intimidating them because humans reveal their true colors when they're at their most vulnerable."

you blink, dazed by his words. hasn't ajax said something like that before..? "s-so... did i pass?"

you didn't think you said that very loud, but apparently you did, because kaeya and skirk snicker from where they stand. you feel your face burn. aether's smile grows. "yes, little one." he rises to his feet and extends a hand to you, offering to help you up. you hesitate but take his hand regardless, pulling yourself to your feet with aether's help.

"you pass."

what happened then?

as nice as that little introduction to the abyss order was, rest assured that things did not remain that way.

first of all, aether and albedo explain to you in no uncertain terms that you cannot leave this place unless the abyss lets you

you basically have to prove yourself -- prove your worth -- if you want to come and go as you please.

and so, skirk puts you through training

and let me tell you, her training is HELL.

for weeks, you lie awake because of the pain she puts you through for hours at a time.

her endurance training tests not only your stamina, but your pain tolerance. she pushes you to the brink of death and barely waits for you to come back before she's on your ass again

you feel like giving up by the time the first month is over, but skirk sits you down after training one day and explains that you were progressing ten times faster than your brother did.

"ajax wasn't weak," she says, "not by a long shot. but he didn't have any prior training, and that stunted his growth." she hands you something to drink, chuckling when you gulp at it desperately. "did ajax even train you? also, slow down, kid, you might choke."

you gasp for air once you think you're fully hydrated. "no," you say between breaths, "he didn't."

now that you were acutely aware of your natural strengths and weaknesses, you know that you were born with better instincts than the average person. skirk told you that it was actually intuition, but you felt it was more than that. maybe it was a combination of the two.

if it was your intuition, then you would know why you felt the way you did in certain situations. intuition was born out of experiences and was based in your subconscious; in your case, you would have had to experienced all sorts of danger at some point to know why you respond the way you do.

but you didn't have any experience. up until now, you were a completely normal sixteen year old with a normal(-ish) life. somehow, your quick reactions and responses were already hardwired into you. with these sharp instincts, you quickly became a better fighter than even your brother.

skirk frowns at your words. "he should have. there's a lot of potential in you, and you're only just now tapping into it. now," she taps you twice, "let's get back to it."

you groan and stand, ignoring the screaming of your joints.

"oh, and one more thing." skirk pats your shoulder fondly. "happy birthday, kid. let's go."

you gape at your instructor. you never told her your birthday.

somehow, between the hellish training and near death experiences, you found a family in the people you met in the abyss.

your 17th birthday came and went, and before you knew it, you'd been in the abyss for six months.

by this point, you've grown close to the abyss prince

he's incredibly multi-faceted, which made more sense to you when you learned that he wasn't even a being from this world

he's a lot more terrifying and powerful than he looks, which didn't surprise you, considering you could feel power rolling off of him from the moment you met

you also learn that he's a twin and that they're separated from each other. he looks so guilty when he tells you the story.

"i walked away from her." aether says with a bitter smile. "i can't leave this place -- these people. not until i've finished what needs to be done. i'm sure she'll understand soon."

you hum in understanding. if ajax was here for three months, then surely he knew about this too. you wonder, distantly, if you'll be able to reconnect with him after this. "can i ask what your sister's name is?"

aether's smile becomes fond as several memories flash before his eyes. "lumine." he murmurs her name so softly; so reverently. you smile in return. you get that feeling. "her name is lumine."

"i was going to liyue to meet her," you inform the prince. his eyes widen a fraction, but he doesn't look displeased. "ajax talks so highly of her, so i wanted to be her friend."

aether rests a hand on your head. your smile fades when you think that he reminds you of ajax.

"she'd love you as much as i do." the prince says.

you find a family during your time down there.

what happens when you leave?

reality is not as kind to you as i've made it seem

age means nothing in the abyss. you are not spared a single detail. you know everything from your time there.

you fight alongside the remaining peoples of khaenri'ah, doing the job that the famed twilight sword could not.

you are highly respected and feared, but you become jaded in response.

you earn your electro vision while fighting monsters, but it means nothing to you. not when you know what you know.

a year passes in the abyss before you are told by albedo that you should leave with him.

(assuming that ajax was in the abyss for three months but was only missing for 3 days, the same would apply to you. 12 months = 12 days.)

he has responsibilities in mondstadt, but he can ensure that you arrive in liyue safely.

he, like aether, kaeya, and skirk, have become family to you, so saying your goodbyes is a tearful affair

sort of. you haven't cried in almost 5 months now, but you're not emotionless. you don't know the next time you'll see aether or skirk again, so its only natural you get choked up

you take albedo's hand and suddenly... you're in liyue harbor. you have no idea how he managed to get you here, but before you can thank him, he's gone.

you're on your own now, but it doesn't daunt you much. you decide to sightsee before setting off to find your brother.

ajax has become... secondary.

it ticks you off that the people of liyue hold rex lapis in such high regard. if only they knew how much blood their beloved archon had on his hands.

you're also disgusted with your former self; you can't believe you once thought the tsaritsa was worthy of respect. going home seems like a terrible idea.

keep in mind, you're still just a kid, but you've adopted the mind of a warrior -- of a soldier.

(although you will admit, it's strange having had a birthday in the abyss only to re-emerge and still technically be sixteen, but we move)

you have the marks of a soldier all over you; the faded bruises, the scars, fresh and old alike

the calloused hands, the honed senses..

you and ajax are now on the same page; you both see yourselves as weapons

but now, you are weapons pointed at each other.

what does he think when he sees you?

after being your own tour guide and familiarizing yourself with liyue harbor, you decide that it's finally time to face your brother.

you head to northland bank and walk in with your head held high. you know how the people of snezhnaya judge those who look as though they don't belong. the fatui, as snezhnayan citizens, must be even worse than the average person.

you may have been raised in a home overflowing with love, but just outside that home was a nation so unforgiving, even the weather acted as judge, jury, and executioner on behalf of the citizens.

you make your way to the receptionist and keep your expression as blank as possible. "i'm here for the eleventh." you say. it rubs you the wrong way having to address your brother in such a manner, but you brush it off. "where is he?"

the receptionist, ekaterina, glares at you suspiciously from behind her mask. she must be sizing you up. "i'm afraid i don't know who you're referring to." she answers you slowly. "did your parents ask you to say something like this?"

you actually chortle. she has a point; you may not feel like it, but you're still a child. plus, kaeya taught you that you shouldn't try to make yourself tough. doing that would make you seem like an inexperienced idiot. ekaterina asks you what's funny and you shake your head.

"it's nothing. no, my parents didn't put me up to this." you drop your shoulders and roll them back. you'd been holding them so high this whole time because you've never had to put your training into practice on actual people before. the tension seeps right out of you as you realize how easy this is. "i know what i said. should i not have called him the eleventh? should i call him by name?" you smirk when the receptionist begins to fluster. "what? did you think i didn't know who he was?"

"i... would advise against it." ekaterina says. she looks left and right before calling another employee over. they discuss something in hushed tones for a moment before you see the other person start ushering people out of the bank.

confused, you put your hands behind your back and grab your wrist. the sudden emptying of the bank puts you on edge, but you know better than to call on your weapon before your potential opponent does. "is there a reason for this?" you ask as politely as you can muster.

ekaterina gestures to the door and you turn to see two fatui agents blocking it. that was your only exit. "miss, either you explain what's going on, or i find the eleventh myself." you warn lowly. "i'd rather not do the latter."

the receptionist ignores you. "you're a dangerous person, calling on lord harbinger so freely. rather than trouble him with your presence, i believe we should handle you first."

you sigh. not even six hours on the surface and you're already being challenged. you release your wrist and shake your head. you know what you came here for; if your brother was going to be the one to handle you, then you'd prefer that.

"i'd rather not harm you and your co-workers, ma'am." you tilt your head in an attempt to come across as harmless as possible, but you feel the presence of the two fatui agents slowly approaching from behind you. did they think you wouldn't notice them because of their cloaking? "you have about five seconds before i call on him myself. i know he's here."

"your bluffing skills need work, little one." is all ekaterina says before she tilts her chin up. it must be a signal, because the two fatui agents are suddenly speeding at you from both sides.

you avoid them with ease and use all the air in your lungs to call for your brother. "ajax!"

"alright, alright."

to the surprise of the agents who have their knives pointed at your throat, ajax strides down the stairs in the back, his face dark. "is all of this really necessary?" he's speaking to the agents, who have all bowed before him. "who could possibly warrant this kind of behavior from you?"

you clear your throat, forcing your brother to look your way. you wiggle your fingers in greeting and laugh at his expression. "i think they mistook me for someone else." you chuckle.

ajax's humorous expression becomes unreadable very quickly. it's hard to pinpoint what exactly he's feeling as he looks at you. "you..." he murmurs. he steps towards you and holds your face in his hands as gently as his hands possibly can. he flicks his other hand to dismiss the remaining agents, his eyes not leaving yours for a second. "you're here..?"

your smile grows tight with confusion. "uh.. yes? are you gonna start interrogating me now?"

ajax puffs out a breath. "no, that's not..." he suddenly pulls you into a bone-crushing hug.

"a-ajax, this wasn't the reunion i had in mind," you wheeze as you struggle to hug him back. "are you happy to see me or not?"

your brother sniffs softly. "mom told me... you'd gone missing." his voice is quiet and shaky. even before his return from the abyss, he would always lower his voice when he was on the brink of tears. "you ran away from home, didn't you..?"

you're not sure what kind of sharp pain stabs your chest, but you think it might be guilt. without thinking, you did the exact same thing to your parents that your brother did, except this time, they must genuinely believe that you're dead. you tighten your hold on ajax. "i was coming to see you," you confess. "you made lumine sound really cool, so i... i left. i, uh.." you grimace slightly. "got lost."

ajax lets you go at that and goes back to staring at you so intently, you think he's looking for something. just then, you think he finds it, because he suddenly looks disturbed. "you got lost." he repeats. there's something stony and suspicious in his tone. you don't like it. "where exactly? do you know?"

he knows you're lying. or at least, it seems that way. you decide to play dumb. "i dunno," you lie, "i've never been outside snezhnaya."

that part wasn't a lie, but ajax still looks at you in disbelief. "you're not telling me everything." he's starting to glare at you now. "tell me the truth."

"i told you the truth, ajax."

"people don't just go for missing for twelve days, come back alive, and have no recollection of what happened." ajax crosses his arms over his chest. you're picking up on some growing hostility. not disappointment, not relief... hostility. "either tell me the truth, or--"

"or what?" you snap. you knew things would be different when you got back, but you didn't think it would be like this. part of you wanted to keep your relationship with ajax intact, but as the two of you go on your guard, you know that that's not going to be possible. "what will you do, ajax? fight me over a lie?"

ajax's eyebrows twitch. "why do you think i'm going to fight you? do i look like i am?"

"don't act stupid," you gesture to his posture. he's not in any fighting stance, but experience tells you that he's preparing himself for battle. you're not sure if he's going to go on offense or defense, but it doesn't matter. he's wary of you, and he's doing a terrible job of hiding it. "you're terrible at masking bloodlust, ajax."

your brother visibly tenses and takes a step back. recognition flashes in his eyes. "what did you say?"

"i said you fucking suck at hiding when you want to fight. be more subtle about it. i don't wanna fight you anyways." a part of you begins to ache at the way ajax is acting, but at his core, he's the servant of the very archons you were now trained to resist. he was your enemy now, whether you liked it or not.

the ache spreads through your whole body and your frustration fizzles out. why did it have to be this way? you started your journey just to see ajax, so why? why was he looking at you like that? you reach towards him. "i really, really don't want to fight you, ajax." you say brokenly. "please."

ajax doesn't share in your sentiments. you've never seen him in action before, but now, you think you understand what his enemies feel when he's before them. he shakes his head slightly, his expression pained. "would you stop saying my name like that?"

"what? ajax, i--"

"only my family calls me by that name," he cuts in sharply.

tears sting your eyes. "ajax..."

"you're not my little sibling." it looks like it hurts him to say it -- like he doesn't believe the words coming out of his own mouth, but he continues. "i don't know who you are, but you aren't them." he pauses to turn some words over in his mouth. "but... if you are, then... i need you to tell me the truth."

you shake your head. "of course i'm your little sibling! b-but i can't tell you everything, okay? i want to, i do, but skirk, she--" your throat closes. you've said too much.

ajax rushes forward and holds your shoulder tightly. "you met her. i fucking knew something was wrong with you -- that's where you were."

"i c-can't say anymore than that," you cry, tears falling on their own accord. you were so close to losing ajax completely just now. even if you two could never be what you once were, you didn't want to lose your brother. he was all you had now -- if you went home, they'd likely give you the same treatment they gave him. "i was there, but i can't--"

"twelve days... a fucking year?" ajax looks mortified at the thought of being in the abyss for so long. shattered sympathy fills his eyes. "what happened to you?"

you shake your head mutely. you've already said too much. if you say anymore, you might ruin the delicate balance that aether's worked so hard to maintain. so you hug your brother, finally sobbing as the horrors of the past year replay in your mind.

it was terrifying, what happened there. the things you saw and learned were enough to bring the strongest person to their knees. but you, a mere child, stuck around for an entire year, fighting a war you had no business being involved in. you were exhausted and damaged, and you nearly lost the only family you had left.

ajax presses you to his chest, shushing you quietly. "alright, alright. you're safe now." you sob again, and he sighs shakily. if you could see him, you'd see the silent tears on his face. "you're safe."

✧ it's been like. six hours. i really hope this didn't fall apart at the end... anyways, i suppose i'll announce that i'm planning an interactive story event to celebrate reaching 400! it's still in the planning stage, but i just wanted to let you guys know bc i'm really excited :D okay i hope you enjoyed it bye !

I fucking agree with this. grow up fgs

Okay sit down we need to have a talk. I have never been so disappointed in this fandom. Who the actual fuck though it would be okay to send death threats to Asagiri. You're being childish you are being idiotic and you need to stop. I have seen shit as someone who was in both the Voltron and the My Hero fandoms and this shit is not okay.

I shouldn't have to tell you not to send fucking death threats of the series you are investing your time into. Telling people not to bully others over fictional characters shouldn't be a controversial statement.

Be better than this.

Aether calls Paimon emergency food as a joke or an affectionate nickname in reference of how they met. Lumine is 100% serious about eating Paimon if she is ever low on food.

[video]

Akiren, Goro kissing headcanons

Note: i hope this is to your liking anon! <3

Akiren

He honestly does not care where he is, if you ask for a kiss, you are getting one! Although, of course, there are limits. He would not engage in a full-on make out session with you outside, but he would definitely indulge you in a kiss or two. There may be times where he gives the back of your hand kisses too, and if you turn to look at him he will give you a smile and a wink.

In private though, his kisses are gentle and reassuring, you will never want to leave his arms. This man is absolutely in love with you, completely taken by you, and he makes sure you feel the full extent of his feelings. Whenever you pull away, he will nuzzle your nose and whisper a soft, "I love you so much," against your lips. He likes giving you neck kisses too, especially if you're ticklish there. If you show any kind of reaction, he will kiss you there whenever he is in the mood to be playful. He is also the kind of person to give you a kiss, just cause. You're in the way and he needs to pass through? Gives you a quick kiss in your shoulder, and an "Excuse me, treasure."

His kisses are fun and passionate, another way of expressing his love and as a way to keep him grounded. Sometimes, as he kiss a ticklish spot and you giggle, he smiles to himself and thinks that everything is going to be okay, because he has you.

Goro

He is not really into PDA, especially considering he has a public image to uphold and he thinks it will put you in harm's way if the both of you ever try to publicize your relationship. So if you ever ask him to kiss outside, he will wave you off. But if you are in a semi-private place, somewhere you can probably hide for a few minutes, then he may give you a peck on the lips. That's all you're getting though, as he tells you, "Be patient, please."

Whenever you are behind closed doors though, there's a sense of urgency and need behind his kisses. As if he is trying to confirm for himself that you are really there with him, and that it is his only lifeline. If you keep indulging him, he may or may not get addicted. He also likes giving you forehead kisses, and you may find him giving you a lot of those when he is extra affectionate. He finds your kisses as a way to 'recharge', and so in the times you are tangled up in each other's embrace, he makes the most of it. "Are you okay?" you asked one night, and Goro nods while tucking a stray hair behind your ear and a kiss on your nose, "I am now."

His kisses are a way for him to express his feelings, because gods is he terrible at it sometimes. But he is trying, and he hopes that somehow, that reaches you. There are so many things he cannot tell you yet, and when he remembers that, his kisses turn desperate and needier than usual.

I'm in love with him ♡

So I decided to look up what songs are turning 10 this year and I'm very *dabs* old and upset

First of all I’d like to apologize for leaving Chongyun out of these requests- I really just couldn’t get in the headspace for him on this one for some reason, I’m sorry!

Also, this is my first time for writing Scaramouche and if you couldn’t tell, I’m a sucker for Soft!Scara. 😔 sorry if you were expecting something harsher! I’ll figure out how to write for him as I go since I got a few more req’s with him in it.

And lastly, these got a lot longer than I intended, so whoops.

Xiao, Albedo, Scaramouche Neglecting Their S/O

Xiao:

Xiao:

Waiting for Xiao to come back to the Wangshu Inn after a full day of exorcising demons was not out of the ordinary for you, but that was only under normal circumstances.

You knew Xiao. Or at least, you liked to think you did- Having been in a romantic relationship for several years, and companionship for even longer, gave you the idea that you could call yourself a Xiao expert, at least when it came to all beings except the Geo Archon himself. So when he disappears for long swathes of time without any word or warning, you worry, but ultimately trust him to come back home to you at the end of it all.

That’s not how it’d gone as of recent, however. Xiao would be gone for weeks, and it isn’t until you hear from Goldet that you know he returned for a short amount of time before leaving again, leaving you in the dust. It seemed at every turn you would miss him by the thread of a hair, at one point catching his figure fading away into the night sky as you climbed to the tallest balcony of the Inn. If you didn’t know any better, you’d say he was avoiding you.

...But you knew him, right?

You couldn’t be so sure anymore. Contemplating the reason for Xiao’s consistent disappearances, you gazed down dejectedly at the deflated and now room-temperature Almond Tofu in front of you on the table. You had just tried calling his name, if only to get him to appear for just a few seconds before he was off again- But nothing. He never appeared. He never came at your call the first, second, fifth, eighth time- And with each one the tears welled up more and more in your eyes before spilling over, and with it came the choking feeling in your throat. You couldn’t call out his name anymore, afraid to be met with silence once again.

He said he’d be there when you called, that he’d protect you from danger, but where was he now? Was he hurt, and couldn’t get to you, and you couldn’t even help him? Or was he listening to each and every call, but ignoring them and hoping you’d forget his name eventually? Why couldn’t he just tell you if he didn’t want you around anymore?

Each thought swarmed inside your head, creating a miasma that only you could feel. It consumed you so much that you hadn’t even noticed Xiao walk onto the balcony, hadn’t noticed the worried call of your own name from his lips, or the sound of footsteps as he hurriedly neared you. It was only when he kneeled on one knee and grabbed your shoulder that you registered his presence, sobs silencing in shock. You stared at him, wondering if he was actually here, but all worries were disproven when he spoke.

“You’re crying. Why? Who hurt you?” Xiao asked, looking ready to summon his spear at the possible names you’d respond with. You sniffled, wiping your puffy eyes with your sleeve.

“N-no one...It’s just…” You bit your lip, unable to look him in the eye all of a sudden. “Xiao...Do you...Do you even love me anymore? Did I do something wrong to make you run so far away all the time? Please, tell me the truth.” You pleaded with him, closing your eyes and waiting for his answers.

Xiao stayed there in shocked silence, unable to comprehend you at this moment. Of course he loved you! Didn’t you know that was why he’d been gone for so long, fighting the cursed entities of Liyue so that you may walk it free of worries?

“Wait...You think I’ve been gone...Because of you?” He asked, unbelieving and with guilt already gnawing away at the inside of his chest.

“What else could it be? I haven’t seen you in nearly a month, Xiao- I wait every day for you, and I always seem to have just missed you every time you come back...I called your name, too, and…” You took a deep breath, steadying yourself. “...And you never came. Not even after many times. I thought you’d never come home…” It felt liberating to finally tell him after all this time, but the pain still lingered and stung inside your chest, eyes still red and burning with tears. Why couldn’t he answer you?

“You...Called my name…” Xiao looked as if he’d seen a ghost, realization dawning on him. You’d called his name and he never came, and that fact hit him like a meteor. How had he not heard you? He made one promise and broke it more than he thought he could even mend it.

“S/O, I…I apologize, I didn’t…I love you.” Was all Xiao managed to get out, knowing he wasn’t good with words meant he’d have to show you some other way. He stood and took you with him, arms coming around your waist and tugging you tightly to him. Xiao buried his face in your neck, inhaling your scent- Safe and familiar, but he could also smell your misery. He made you feel like this, and he hated himself for it. “I love you.” He repeated, trying to convey everything into just those three words.

You felt them in your soul, knowing he didn’t just say them so casually, reserving them for special occasions that he felt needed more than just affection or platitudes. Hearing the affirmation released the tension within your body, and you hugged him back just as tightly, never wanting to let go. “I love you too, Xiao.”

With a mantra of the same three words from Xiao, you knew he’d always come home to you from now on.

Albedo:

You sat in the dark of your home, alone and cold, as you contemplated the past few months events.

The Chief Alchemist came to you one day and warned that he was nearing a breakthrough on an old theory he’d had years ago- One he couldn’t pass the opportunity up on finally solving. He warned that he may become rather distant, distracted, curt- You appreciated the communication, and understood immediately how important this was to him, so you let him know you’d give him the time and space he needed.

But Albedo had never been gone this long, had never strayed from you like this...Even if he was busier than ever, he’d always accepted your passing kisses and reminders to take care of himself, often times even mumbling out an idle “I love you” that brought heat to your cheeks and a swell of adoration in your chest. He was distant, yes, but you knew this going into the relationship. It was just a part of who he was, to become engrossed and passionate in his projects of alchemy and science. It’s one of the things that you fell for, among many others.

Albedo tried back then. He tried to see you, tried to plan dates and spend time with you even if all you did was nap together. He tried to reciprocate every kiss, every touch, every effort that you put in. He once told you that it was only fair he made you as happy as you made him. Wasn’t that still true? Or did he finally grow tired of you, tired of maintaining such a high-effort relationship that has seen its use through? Did Albedo still care for you, or was this simply a way for him to get you to break up, to wear your patience and heart thin enough to snap at a single breeze?

Whatever it was, it worked, and here you sat at the dinner table trying not to let the salty tears fall the more you thought about the enveloping loneliness you’ve experienced for months on end. You wanted to be hopeful, you really did- But it was hard when at every turn, Albedo made himself scarce.

This was the 14th date he’d agreed and never shown up to, and perhaps it would be the last.

You made no move to get up when the front door finally swung open, a clearly fatigued figure making its way through the frame one heavy step at a time before closing and locking it. You knew it was Albedo- But what did that matter now when the food and candles had long gone cold, and your heart ever so colder? You couldn’t bear to look at him now, the tears finally falling but still made no sound, no movement.

“S/O? What are you doing awake so late?” Albedo asked, his voice a hoarse whisper like he hadn’t used it in ages. He probably hadn’t, in all actuality.

“Nothing.” Was all you said, miserably watching your tears stain the wood surface of the table in the light of the moon.

“That’s-“

You interrupted him before he could even start. “Do you even love me anymore, Albedo? Or are we done here?”

Expecting the silence that ensued for several minutes, you stood from the chair and made way for the bedroom, intent on leaving him to the couch. The silence was all the answers you needed, and thought perhaps you could find a way to pack his things and bring them to him without causing a scene at the Favonius headquarters-

Until a hand around your wrist stopped you.

“Wait- S/O...Where is this coming from?” He asked, hopelessly lost. You almost laughed, if not for the crushing tension in your chest. You turned around, ripping your wrist from his grip and watching his expression turn to one of surprise and...Hurt?

“Where is this coming from? Albedo, we haven’t seen each other in months!” Your voice shook with emotion, but continued. “You don’t talk to me, whenever I come to see you the knights won’t let me in, you come home when I’m asleep and leave before I awake- And when I do finally get a hold of you to ask for some time together, you make a promise and break it just as fast! Yet again I’ve sat at home waiting for you, but you never come home.” You started off strong, but the tears and pain took hold and made you weak near the end, voice tapering off to a broken whisper.

“I just want you to come home, Albedo…” You couldn’t bear to look at him anymore, hiding in shaking hands and vainly wiping away tears. “I know you told me this might happen, but...It still hurts…” What was the point in this? Was he even listening? He still hadn’t said a thing, and it just might drive you crazy not getting any real answers.

Finally, you heard footsteps approach you, before the warmth of his embrace enveloped you fully. You broke, sobbing loudly in his arms as he rubbed your back soothingly, pressing light kisses to your head. You let it all out, clutching his shirt and not even caring that tears and snot stained it. Hearing your agony shattered his heart, but he knew it was nothing compared to what you’re feeling right now.

It took a while to calm down, but eventually you silenced, only a few stray tears and hiccups escaping now. Albedo continued to hold you tightly, not letting go in the slightest. He feels as though if he did, you’d slip through his fingers and he’d be alone yet again. Ironic, isn’t it?

“I’m so sorry, my flower...I never meant to hurt you. I simply...Ah, let me be honest- I had forgotten what truly mattered, and neglected you, allowing you to suffer the consequences of my actions and assuming you’d still be here when I finished my work.” He pulled back slightly to see you, a hand coming up to cup your reddened cheek. You shakily looked back at him, still unsure, but the gentle look in his eyes and curve of his brow was more than you were expecting to see. Had he...Finally listened?

“I put my work above you when it never mattered nearly as much in hindsight, and for that I am truly sorry. I know my promises as of late haven’t been reliable, but...Will you allow me to make one more, so that I may correct my mistakes?” You knew this was his way of asking for forgiveness, and it was still so hard to deny him despite all the pain he’d put you through recently…So, taking a deep breath, you rested your ear against his chest and exhaled heavily.

“Alright...This is the last promise, Albedo. If you break it, I’m not sure there will be much of me left to mend.” As you said that, you could hear his heartbeat’s pace quicken, though for what reason you weren’t entirely sure. Fear, perhaps, at what you’d insinuated? Or excitement that you were giving him one last chance? Perhaps it was both...

“I’ll keep you intact, S/O, my beloved. I promise.”

Scaramouche:

They always warned you about the trials of dating a Harbinger, but you stupidly ignored them all.

The fact that you managed to capture the attention, and more miraculously affection, of the Balladeer was almost unbelievable some days. You weren’t Fatui yourself, but you’d seen him work many a times, and became familiar with how he carried himself in the presence of literally anyone but you. The drastic change in demeanor almost gave you whiplash at the start of it all- He’d threaten and throw around harsh orders for his subordinates all day long, but as soon as he turned to you, Scaramouche became soft as a slime, and just as pliable to your desires as well.

Sure, he still held a rather gruff exterior as he pined for your attention and touch, but he really meant you no harm. The last thing the man wanted to do was hurt the one good thing he has in his life, the one person who supports and loves him unconditionally. He’d never do anything to cause you to leave, to end the bliss you two had together.

Or so you thought.

Scaramouche’s mood took a wild turn one day after coming home, slamming the door and declaring all of humanity as scum. Having heard this speech before, you came over to offer comfort and reprieve as you always did, only to be roughly shoved off and ignored as he stormed his way to the bedroom, going to bed and leaving you there in the middle of your shared home. Idly you realize he’d never done that before- Never once handled you half as rough as he just did, and that fact shook you to the core. Who managed to affect Scaramouche so horribly that he took it out on even you? Whatever it was, you were sure he’d be better in the morning and maybe even apologize to you then.

Except he didn’t, and the mood continued for days. You tried everything you could think of to help him regain a semblance of the softness he usually displayed with you. Anywhere from his favorite meals to drawing relaxing baths with the products he favored, you tried to alleviate the stress, but nothing seemed to work. It escalated to him outright ignoring you, and after a few more days, he stopped coming home altogether.

It ate away at you, but what could you do, more than what you’ve already done? Slowly you began to have doubts, doubts that you’ve never encountered once before in your whole relationship with Scaramouche- Did he still care about you the same way he once did? Was he fed up with the world and, by extension, you? Why did he seem to have little mercy now for your feelings, little regard for the loneliness and worry he’s putting you through? He hasn’t stepped through your door in weeks. In a way, you wonder if this is how he’s chosen to leave you. Wordless, and without reprieve.

It all comes crashing down on you when he finally does walk through the front door, hat already discarded and in his hands as he hangs it up on the coat rack beside him. He acts as if he never left for days on end, never left your heart in shattered pieces- And he doesn’t acknowledge you until you start bawling right there on the couch. Unable to contain the pain anymore, you curl over and cry, wanting him to say something, anything at all.

You barely hear the stuttered breath that comes from him, but you definitely hear the frantic footsteps in your direction before your hands are pulled from your face, and are met with the concerned gaze of the Balladeer. It’s the first time you’ve seen anything other than rage on his face, and it’s such a relief that you almost laugh.

“Hey, why are you crying? What happened? Tell me already! I’ll kill whoever-“ He starts, but is interrupted by the pull of your arms around his neck, and the presence of warm tears staining his shirt from where you bury your face. Shocked, but not unwelcoming, he tentatively holds you.

“P-please don’t leave me! I don’t know what I can do, I just- Do you even love me anymore, Scara?” You babble uselessly, not even fully aware of what you’re saying, but talking is easing the pain and you’re not about to stop.

“Hey, that’s...Of course I do, what the hell is this about?” He questions, and even though he’s confused, he feels like this has to do with the past two weeks…

No one ever said he was a genius in social skills.

“You...You’ve just been so angry recently, even with me, I...I’ve been scared…Scared I did something, that it wasn’t work that had you in a bad mood but instead me!” You confessed.

“Scared?” Scara mused, unbelieving. He scared you? How had he not noticed that? Was he really so wrapped up in his own anger that he ignored how it affected you as well? “...You didn’t do anything wrong, S/O. I’m...Sorry...I made you feel like that.” You could hear the strain in his voice, knowing even if he could be gentle with you, that didn’t mean he suddenly was okay with verbalizing tenderness just as well. It was still hard.

You shook your head, which just rubbed your face into his shirt again. “Please don’t shut me out, Scara. Not again. I can’t be alone right next to you like that again.” Feeling his hand scratch lightly at your back, a sigh brushed across your shoulder from where his chin rested.

“I won’t leave you alone. I promise.”

———

NSFW HCs

Xiao:

After that night, Xiao made good on his promise to come home to you every night he could.

While his job to protect Liyue is hardly contained within the daylight hours, there are some times where he can spare a few hours to see you to bed, but not always to sleep…

The night you broke down in particular, he made a point to make you happy again. He feels incredibly guilty for being a source of sadness for you, that he would do anything to make up for it.

When it was time for bed, he laid with you and cuddled for a while before asking if he could make it up to you in a more...intimate way.

You agreed, and he made sure to worship every part of you. With his tongue, his hands, his lips, eyes, anything to coax those addictive moans out of you.

He won’t cum that night unless you take things into your own hands. He insists on focusing on you, forgoing his own pleasure in pursuit of ravishing you completely. If you hadn’t cum more than 3 times before he even thought about sticking his dick inside you, he wasn’t doing it right.

Xiao made sure that by the end of the night, you knew how thoroughly he loves you.

Albedo:

He promised to keep you intact, but later that night he made you fall apart in all the best ways.

Ever the dutiful scientist, Albedo recalls all the little mental note of the best places to touch you, and abuses them to your benefit. He’s aware of each and every little sensitive spot, of what gets you going faster than anything else, of what words to say to get you to keen so sweetly in his ear.

He does whatever you ask of him, tonight is all about you he says. If you want him to take control, he will. If you want to take control, he’ll oblige without a complaint.

Not that he normally would anyway, but there’s an eagerness in each and every movement that Albedo rarely ever has that tells you tonight is special.

Absolutely overstimulates you into oblivion, and at the end of the night, you can barely even recall why you were crying earlier.

The night fades into morning when Albedo lets you rest, and stays in bed for as long as you want him.

Anything to make it up to you.

Scaramouche:

True to his word, Scaramouche doesn’t leave you alone for a single second the rest of the night.

In fact, he all but carries you to the bedroom, promising he’d find some ways to make it up to you and ease the loneliness a little faster.

Ease them he does, and with every gentle caress you can feel the nights tensions fly away into the breeze that floats through the open window. He’s more tender, slower tonight than he’s been any other night- You can tell he’s sorry just by the way he kisses you deeply.

Never breaks eye contact as he brings you to orgasm again and again, asking if you want another, and another, and another-

You’ll have to be the one to ask for his cock, otherwise he doesn’t even think about using it that night. But once you do, his thrusts are slow, powerful, languid- Each one hitting spots that make you see stars.

Incredibly meticulous, and calculated. He knows where to touch, and when. He’s got your body down to an instrument he expertly plays, and don’t you dare hide those moans. He wants to hear it all.

Scaramouche wants to hear the loneliness leave your body with every drop of cum that slides out of you.

Drew my friend's oc Izzy! ❤️❤️❤️

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