Stranger Things Textposts -> Eddie’s Version

Whenever I hear the word platonic now anywhere outside of Stranger Things, little tiny Robin and Steve start running around in my head.

I saw the ask about a!Eddie bragging about having King Steve wrapped around his finger and Steve finding out and it made me imagine an alternate ending. (Fanfic of fanfic, if you will.)

Instead of Steve being seen and him running away, he absorbs the (false) fact that Eddie doesn’t actually care for him and is only with him for the ego boost, and it causes Steve to develop rejection sickness while technically not having been rejected. So he’s still with Eddie, the alpha not realizing Steve heard him, and pretends everything is fine while slowly getting sicker and sicker because his inner omega feels unwanted and used and like it doesn’t have an alpha after all.

Eddie only realizes the damage he’s done when Steve ultimately collapses and the truth comes out.

(referring to this ask)

the funniest part of this is that we got a happy ending on that one but you wanted to make it worse instead😭

Safe

Adding onto Steve's crime spree from this (and this and this)

Eddie has determined that he's not asking the right questions in life.

Is he questioning the man? Yes. Every day.

Is he asking Wayne for help when his van shits the bed on Thursday? No. When his van is still unusable come Saturday, did he ask his friends if he could catch a ride to band practice? No.

Did he ask if he could get a ride home? Also no.

It's raining and Eddie regrets his life choices so hard, he doesn't notice the Porsche 928 until it blows through the crosswalk he was about to step onto. He's hit with a tidal wave of frigid early November street water because, of course, he is.

"Fuck's sake," Eddie swore, pushing his wet hair out of his face. In his perphery, the Porche slams on its breaks and rolls back into the crosswalk beside him, but he barely notices. Talking to the driver, the world, or god, Eddie does not know when he rants, "Thanks! Thanks for that, I really need pnumonia. Thanks for bestowing-"

"Sorry, man," Steve says, an apologetic wince sticking out of the open window of the Porche. "Wanna ride? I can take you where you're going."

Eddie looks at the car, then at Steve, and then back at the car and signs, "...Fine, but only because this car is beautiful and not to expunge your guilt."

"Dude, I don't think a sponge is going to help."

Eddie rolls his eyes but sticks his guitar in the trunk before sliding into the passenger seat. He has to physically stop himself from touching everything. He's never even seen a Porche before, wow.

Steve's in the driver's seat looking like he's dying for Eddie to ask about the car so he can talk about it. Honestly, Eddie wants to ask about the car. He probably should have asked about the car but instead, he shakes the water out of his hair like a dog as payback.

"C'mon, man," Steve complains, wiping the water off his face. "Watch the leather."

Eddie gives him directions and then bites the bullet. He asks the wrong question, "You trade in the Beamer?"

"No way. That's my baby," He says. "I'm just borrowing this lady."

The conversation is actually nice. None of Eddie's friends know anything about cars but Steve seems to know a lot. He can almost forgive the guy for being a jock and the psychological warfare he's bestowed onto Eddie's brain the past week and a half, but then-

“It sounds like - shit," Eddie says, echoing the same sentiment as Steve at the sight of flashing red and blue lights in the rear view. A question he should've been asking all along occurs to him, "Did you steal this car?"

Steve gives him an annoyed look and then rolls down his window, smiling that All-American smile, "Heya, Hop. Didn't think you were working today."

"This car was reported stolen."

Eddie swears, sinking into the leather with the hopes that it eats him. Steve doesn't even hesitate, "Let me guess, Mrs. Woolledge? Crazy she knows what all her neighbors are doing but not that her kid's on dope."

Hopper doesn't say anything and the silence is loud so Steve adds, "It's not stolen. It's my dad's car. I have permission."

"From your dad?" Hopper asks, getting an annoyed nod from Steve. "Same dad that's out of town?"

"Well, Hop. There's this thing called a phone."

"You get that MRI...right? Throw the keys out the window," Hopper says. Eddie's mentally preparing on how he's going to explain this to Wayne when he calls from jail. Steve protests. Hopper demands, "Throw. The keys. Out. The. Window. Now."

Steve seems to realize that he's pushing his luck because he does just that. He even gets out of the car when Hopper tells him to. Hopper tells him to get in his truck and Steve straight up lies, "Hop, I'm taking my friend home. We're working on a school project together. At his house.”

Eddie curses Steve's entire bloodline from start to finish when Hopper lookings directly at him still in the car, "That true?"

Say no. Say you don't know him. Say you know nothing. Say anything but, "Yes."

"What subject?'

"History," Steve says at the same time Eddie says 'Art' and then rolls his eyes, "Art history, yeah?"

Hopper nods like he thinks they're full of shit and then tells them both to get in his truck.

Steve protests but more about leaving the car on the street than anything else while Eddie briefly thinks about the psychic his mom used to know. He wonders if she could curse someone for real. Maybe he can call her from jail.

He's fully ready to see the police station that he fails to realize where Hopper's going until they’re in Forest Hills. He turns and looks at both of them and says, "I'd like to know what grade you get on this project."

"Aye, aye, Captain," Steve says with a salute, pulling Eddie out of the car. Once they're inside, Steve peaks out the blinds like, "Yeah, he'll sit there for a while. He thinks I'm lying. Wanna smoke?"

Eddie is baffled, "No."

"Okay," Steve shrugs and flops down on the couch. He pulls a set of keys out of his pocket and adds, "Spare key. We just gotta wait until he's gone and can circle back for your guitar."

The only thing Eddie can think is, “what the fuck” and he doesn’t even know which part he’s talking about.

Original post date: August 17 2022

Original caption: roof cuddles

stranger things season 3 is really so funny like wdym nancy and jonathan are dealing with body horror reality breakers while mike and the gang are in the lobby two floors below them throwing skittles into each other's mouths MEANWHILE robin and steve are breaking into a secret russian military base and getting tortured like. this is all in the same episode.

The party jokingly calls Steve mom so when Eddie comes along and he and Steve starts actually being friends Eddie becomes dad (because 80s gender rolls)

When they start dating Eddie jokingly calls Steve "his darling wife, Stevie" and other similar things it becomes more and more common and with his love of pet names he never just calls him Steve anymore

So it really isn't his fault that when corroded coffin gets their big break and they're doing their first big interview and the interviewer asks about wives or girlfriends supporting them through their rise to fame Eddie jumps at the chance to talk about his lovely wife Stevie

Happy turkey day to those that celebrate, I’m thinking about Steve who has absent, borderline neglectful parents but THAT’S ACTUALLY OKAY it’s actually perfect on holidays because Steve’s pretty extroverted and probably has a large group of friends extending from close to “we’re on the same basketball team and Steve will high five your face if you don’t get your hand up fast enough”

so really all he’s gotta do it bat those puppy eyes at some unsuspecting mom and BAM invited to holiday dinner. He probably does rounds, and thankfully he has teenage boy metabolism because he probably manages to fit 7 different moms’ dinner in in one day

And sure, after he graduates he’s not sure if it’s good manners to show up at old teammates’ doorsteps. BUT THEN Mrs. Henderson looks at him mid-November and totally claims him for the day where she’s hosting her brother’s family too. Except Dustin brags to Lucas and Lucas gets jealous so Steve then also has to show up at the Sinclair’s in the evening. Max is already there so Steve drives her home that night with leftovers. (Mike is very secretly butthurt about all of this and is really nasty to Nancy the weeks of thanksgiving and Christmas.)

(Robin’s family doesn’t DO thanksgiving but instead goes camping for the week. Robin hates this, and they wouldn’t let Steve join them even though he had his own tent so she hates it MORE. She tries to mutiny but her mom gives her these sad teary eyes and cries about Robin growing up too fast and robin’s fate is sealed. She and Steve instead have their own tradition of movies and junk food the weekend after, so Robin gets reintroduced real food again. So while Buckley’s aren’t on the thanksgiving rotation, Robin gets special Christmas privileges and Steve stays over on Christmas Eve.)

So by the time Eddie is in the picture, Steve already has standing expectations for his presence that’s not just a drive-by plate cleaning, and he’s kinda sad, he and Wayne don’t usually do much and Wayne has to work usually. But actually how dare he be sad, because Steve’s like “🤨 you’re coming too, stupid” and he Eddie and max go to each house like trick or treaters but for turkey.

Then Steve gets close with Eddie’s friends and they have to start splitting holidays like children of divorce.

One time Steve gets it in his head to hold friends giving the week before. He never does it again.

My brain has created a fun amalgamation of these two posts (link, link)

Steph deciding after Startcourt life is way too short to continue living it for anyone else and immediately starts transitioning, everyone who matters in her life is of course accepting. and the rest of Hawkins is too wrapped up in the drama of the mall to notice that Steph and Steve are the same person, its just assumed Steve got out of dodge after the mall burned down.

the party starts going to hellfire and Stephs babysitter mode activates because these people don't know what monsters and references could set her kids off so she decides to tell Eddie what he is not allowed to use in his campaign or even mention around them. She goes in boymode because no one knows Steph but Steve still has a reputation.

Eddie is very very confused when Steve Harrington approaches him and immediately gets into what he is not under any circumstances to mention in front of the newest members of hellfire and its got to be the weirdest prank or something because the kids have never mentioned knowing Steve at all and all and the only connection Eddie knows about it that Steve is Nancy's ex which would not explain this behavior at all. so of course he has to test it, to disastrous results they do a good job at putting on a brave face but its clear they're terrified and as soon as the session is called they pull out a walkie and start calling for check ins. a voice that must be the mysterious badass and beautiful babysitter Steph that they're constantly going on about tells them to stay put and that she'll come in and get them. they protest that they aren't kids anymore but she isn't hearing it.

Eddies excited to get to see her for himself to see if she really is all they've built her up to be or is this is just a childhood crush clouding their judgment. he decided they haven't been doing her enough justice as she swings the door open and is doing head counts and visual wellness checks backlit from the fluorescents in the hall way like some kind of angel. once shes assured of the partys safety she rounds on him hands on hips looking so bitchy and disappointed "you used something off the list didn't you" it isn't a question. the party catches her attention before he can untie his tongue ruffling hair and giving half hugs, he'll have to thank them latter because the wave goodbye Henderson gives him is definitely conspiratorial like he was taking her attention on purpose.

It takes a day after the weirdness that was the last hellfire meeting for curiosity to get the best of him and he goes to get answers, he has no idea where Steph lives but he's sold at enough Harrington house parties to find his way. Imagine his surprise when its Steph that opens the door and starts talking to him like they've actually conversed before. Like she was the one that gave him the list of things not to mention, while simultaneously dressing him down for not listening.

for at least a brief moment Eddie assumes Steph is dating herself, it would explain how she knows about his conversation with Steve why Steve felt it was his place to tell him about the monsters, maybe she had been busy and he'd offered to go in her stead, and why she was answering his door.

She explains that she can't actually explain all that much about why he cant use demogorgons and mindflayers in his campaigns, because NDAs are a bitch. but does give him what she can leaving him even more curious because what the hell did a bunch of 14 year olds get into in Hawkins that require NDAs

before he leaves though he has to ask how she knows steve because that shouldn't be some huge secret.

Steph looks like a deer in headlights for a moment before doubling over with laughter, snorting hard to breathe crying laughter ( it really shouldn't be as cute as it was) once shes composed herself enough she just states "I am steve"

Steve gets a phone call from Eddie one afternoon. . .

Eddie: So, what are you wearing, big boy?

Steve unfortunately thought Eddie was messing with him, so he decided to mess with him back. Steve rolled his eyes.

Steve: *scoffs* Your vest and nothing else, of course.

There was a long silence and then. . .THUD.

Steve: Eddie?

There was a sound of someone else's feet, and then he heard Wayne's voice in the distance.

Wayne: You damn near broke your new Garfield phone. What are you doing on the floor, and why is your nose bleeding?

Another pause, and Steve heard Eddie speak.

Eddie: Steve. . .vest. . .nothing.

Oops, he accidentally broke Eddie. Steve smirked.