I Made This Post Forever Ago About Robin Finding Out That She Has A Twin And Then Roping Nancy Into Helping

name a more fix-it-fic shippable character than steve harrington i’ll wait

I love Steve has bad parents as much as the next person AND i eat that shit up in every fic i read, but, but– i saw a tiktok with those "what creature is watching you depending on your month" slideshows, so now i have the image of Steve having some shadow parents stuck in my head.

Therefore, now i had to add that to him having bad human parents but at the same time some shy, protective and loving shadow parents.

He doesn’t consider the Harringtons his parents anymore; excuse me, his parents are those shadows that seem to stare at your soul with their bright, pure white eyes and none existent characteristic features apart from their silhouettes. Thank you very much.

He loves them.

So every time someone asks Steve about his parents, he has to make mental gymnastics about if it's OK to talk about the shadow ones or if it's a situation where he has to lie through his teeth about the biological ones.

Steve is just happy to have someone who cares about him and goes to see his games and recitals (because you can pray Steve plays the piano away over my cold death hands) even when no one apart from him (and a few unlucky ones– Eddie, i'm looking at you) notice them.

I wonder how that might work; the party must have their own theories about Steve's parents; none of them it's about them being literal shadow creatures/ entities, though.

I think most of them think they are neglectful; no, they’re not; you just can’t see them because they don't want Steve's friends to freak out.

After the fight with Billy, Steve needs someone to wake him up and take care of him for a bit; he said his parents would do it, but every time someone goes to check on him, he's alone. And Hopper gets suspicious because he doesn’t remember the last time he saw the Harringtons.

Also, Billy starts having so much bad luck and can not stop seeing these shadow figures everywhere; it's probably just his imagination and a bunch of coincidences.

Why is Steve so calm about monsters? It has nothing to do with his parents being literal shadow creatures, ofc. And if in the middle of fighting demodogs he got some help, nobody noticed it.

I just– imagine the party's reaction when they found out? Gold.

Robin is the first to meet them, ofc, following the whole party and then Eddie realizing that "THEY WERE YOUR PARENTS????" When he processed enough the fact that yes, he wasn't seeing things in the corner of every basketball game he went to stare at Steve.

I'm curious what jabed shippers think of the line "lots of girls like me because lets face it, im pretty adorable, and my aloofness unconsciously reminds them of their fathers", because I woke up in a cold sweat thinking about Jeff Daddy Issues Winger. I'm connecting the dots there's something there.

music + stars

Portrait practice from photos (currently obsessed with all thing Joe Keery — it’s probably all the moles, guilty)

Hopper accidentally becomes the biggest ally in Hawkins out of hatred for Mike Wheeler. El wants to date Max? Perfect, Mike is terrified of Max. El wants to date Max and Lucas? Even better, more people to keep Mike away. Will comes out to Joyce and Hop? Hopper is immediately studying up on gay culture and flagging so he can find him a Hop ApprovedTM boyfriend. He sees that nice boy Gareth cuff his jeans one time and starts inviting him to family dinner. Mike seems annoyed that Steve is spending more time with Munson? A pamphlet titled “Accepting your Bisexuality” finds its way into Steve’s jacket pocket. Hopper has never seen Mike as furious as the day Steve and Munson arrive at dinner holding hands. It’s a good day. Hopper isn’t sure how Nancy dating the Buckley girl will annoy Mike, but he’s willing to give it a shot.

i live here now.

Diagnosed with Hanahaki, a genetic autoimmune disease, as a child, Steve has learned to live with it. Along the way, he finds a family and falls in love with Eddie. He is never cured, but he lives.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6

The conversation with Jonathan and Nancy couldn't be called easy, but it was manageable enough for Steve to do it at a time that wasn't even planned. Maybe it was the lack of planning that made it easier, maybe it was the practice he'd been getting over the last few weeks. 

Jonathan apologized profusely, for the pictures he'd taken in '83, for the punch, and for having gotten together with Nancy before she and Steve had actually broken up. Nancy was a little more complicated. Her apologies only came after a lot of pointing out, about all the times she hadn't noticed what was going on with Steve, and she ended up feeling so bad and guilty that Steve almost had to console her.

Luckily, Jonathan had the good sense to try to hold back their emotional response for later, and they both tried to act normally. The next time they met, it was impossible for Steve to help but notice how worn out they both looked, with even bigger bags under their eyes than usual. So, they had to talk a second time, just to make sure that no, Hanahaki didn't start because of either of them and with everything related to the Upside Down happening, they were far from having caused his health to worsen.

It was a lie, but there was no point in wanting them to blame each other after all this time, especially just because of Hanahaki. Steve wished things between the three of them had been simpler, but the illness had nothing to do with it. And after all, compared to everything that had happened, it wasn't that important.

In the midst of all this, he kept talking to Eddie. He shared the fact that his parents' marriage seemed to have improved after his mother was diagnosed and he had never been able to understand that.

He told her how his mother seemed like the protagonist of a dramatic movie, always suffering with such elegance. He remembered one week, when she was bedridden at home, he had to get up very early to get her makeup and help her brush her hair, even though a nurse would come in later and do exactly the same thing.

When he asked about it, his mother said, “I don’t want to be seen like that, Steve.” 

At the time, he didn’t understand, but he was happy to be of service. Months later, when he was diagnosed, he remembered that day and was even more confused, because it was so tiring just to exist, how could he care how shiny his hair looked? When his cheeks were flushed and his lips were soft? 

It took him years to realize why it felt so good to try to take care of his appearance when there was so little he could do for his own body. It was comforting.

But he didn’t share that memory with Eddie. Not yet. 

He just kept talking about his parents. About how Mrs. Harrington liked to have romantic dinners regularly and she had mentioned about ten honeymoons. It was one of her favorite topics of conversation, and she especially loved trying new hobbies or even sports during those trips. His father was okay with it, just so she would be happy.

“I don’t think she wanted to be a mother, just my father’s wife.”

“Absurd!” Eddie exclaimed, anger hidden under theatrics. He let go of the steering wheel for a moment before gripping it tightly, pulling the van into the center of the correct lane. That day, Steve had his monthly checkup and Eddie asked to accompany him, promising a movie afterwards, in a neighboring city. “How could anyone choose your father over you?”

And there it was, once again, Eddie’s ability to make the wounds that Steve hadn’t even mentioned hurt less.

“It’s just that she’s always been in love with him. When I was a kid, I thought it was the most romantic thing in the world. I even wanted to have the same thing.” He laughed thinking about the absurdity of it. “To love so much that even if that person made me feel so much pain, they would also make me very happy.” Steve sighed, serious again. “But I still want someone who would stay with me on a romantic night or sleep in an uncomfortable chair in the hospital.”

Before Eddie had time to say anything, he turned up the volume of the music.

A few hours later, he confessed that Mr. Harrington was that person to his mother, but not in the right way. Because he indulged in his illness almost like a hobby, very involved in it until he was not around Mrs. Harrington and something else caught his attention. 

Steve noticed this when his father called and informed him, very casually, that she was in the ICU. He would spend a fortune to make her live well, yet he seemed barely able to realize that her life was in danger.

A few days later, with the test results in hand and feeling stronger, he invited the kids over for a movie night at his apartment. Hopper offered to help tell them and was so worried that he decided to spend the night at a diner when Steve refused. Joyce, less extreme, promised to be just a phone call away. 

Jonathan and Nancy weren’t there, because they all figured the kids would be less upset if it wasn’t obvious that they were the last ones to find out. 

Guys.” Steve clapped his hands together, then put them on his hips, standing in front of the TV. “I have an announcement to make.” 

“Are you serious?” Mike yelled. “We’re here for the movies!” 

“Shut up, idiot.” 

“We’re here for the movies,” Dustin interjected into the fight that was already starting to form between Max and Mike. “But we’re going to listen to Steve.”

“You’d hear it anyway, you know, we have three adults here to keep you brats in check.” Robin stood next to Steve and began clapping her hands until everyone was quiet. “Steve.” 

Then she went to join Eddie, who was standing behind the kids, silent and watchful. 

It was good to have them both there, someone to look at without letting himself be consumed by terror.

“This has nothing to do with the Upside Down, but it’s very important, so I’ve already talked to Hopper and Joyce too and I don’t want you to get upset, okay? I’m going to talk to everyone about this in the way I thought would make this easier.”

At this point, no one seemed more scared than Max or Dustin. Even Mike, who was trying to keep his expression irritated, looked worried and was the only one who had the courage to speak up.

“Why make such a mystery? Just say it.”

“I’m sick. Hanahaki.”

There were no more movies for the rest of the night, just tears, screaming and hugs. Max barely left Steve’s side and Dustin kept checking his pulse, as if he couldn’t see with his own eyes that Steve was alive. They also had to explain Hanahaki to El and she was so upset that she joined Max. Lucas did too, after a few minutes. He and Will were the quietest, looking too shaken to know how to react.

Dustin got irritated and started talking nonstop about the health care system. Eddie, finding resonance in Dustin’s feelings, also started roasting the pharmaceutical industry.

They all slept together, huddled together, in the living room.

In the middle of the night, Mike, having the same thought as his sister, asked if Nancy had anything to do with it and after being assured that she didn't, Steve realized that he would once again need to educate the people he loved about how Hanahaki really worked and about his family.

When everyone finally left in the early evening of the next day, he only had a few hours before he realized that he would probably need to have a walkie-talkie on him at all times, because everyone wanted to make sure he was okay.

The next time he and Eddie were alone together, Steve continued to talk.

It was a little embarrassed that he confessed that, although he had always wanted his parents’ love, he was relieved by the huge distance between them, because he wouldn’t have to worry about being the cause of his mother’s downfall. Because he couldn’t even imagine what it was like to be so loved by someone who had a disease so influenced by emotions. It seemed terrifying.

“I must be very selfish.”

“For wanting to preserve yourself? Everyone wants that, it’s not selfish, it’s human.”

“I didn’t give you that option.”

Eddie grabbed Steve by the shoulders so they were face to face.

“You did. You practically put a warning sign on your forehead. We all chose to stay here. Because you’re part of our lives and we love you, Hanahaki isn’t going to change any of that.”

Careful with every move he made toward Steve, Eddie leaned in until he could put his head in the crook of Steve’s neck, for the first time in a long time looking like he was the one who needed comfort.

Steve couldn’t describe how happy he was that he could still provide that and tightened his arms around Eddie.

“If it were up to me, you know where we’d be right now. You’re the one being so careful about this, so I don’t regret it. Don’t ever insinuate that you’re selfish for allowing us to feel the joy of being in your life.”

Steve didn't know if he could ever stop feeling guilty, but he would try.

One afternoon, when Steve came home from his shift at Family Video, he found Eddie standing at his door, a folder full of papers in his hand. He didn’t say anything, just waited for Steve to come in and followed.

“I did some research,” he announced and waved the papers. “Dustin helped me a lot, because he’s much better at research than I am.”

And Eddie launched into a somewhat confusing monologue about how 4.4 out of every 500,000 people had the Hanahaki gene and only a few of them actually had a real chance of developing the disease, and even in those cases, environmental factors were very important. In conflict zones, for example, the chances of acute and fatal manifestations were up to 300% higher than in other patients. 5 to 10% of carriers would be lucky enough to only have mild symptoms even under periods of intense stress, but without proper treatment, even those people would be at very serious risk.

Almost all of Hanahaki’s patients who survive the first two years require at least one transplant at some point in their lives. He talked about the complications, the lacerations of internal organs, the blood clotting problems, the cirrhosis, the hypertension, the encephalopathy.

“Steve, I said I’d do my research, and I did. I’m not a smart guy, not that smart.” He held up a piece of paper at random. “I’ve never been interested in medicine, and I’ve never been good at science, so there are some things I may not have understood that well, but I’ve learned a lot. I’m not going into this blind. I know what the expectations are here, I’m a grown man and I can make my own decisions. And I want you. I’ve wanted you, somehow, since high school, I wanted you when I saw how the kids adored you, I wanted you when you came to me even though everyone thought I was a murderer. I wanted you when I saw you take off your shirt, when you jumped in the lake, when you fought the Demobats, when you walked with me through hell. When you pulled me out of there. I’ve wanted you constantly, all the time, for all these months.” He took a deep breath. “I want you. I love you.”

Steve knew that no matter how happy he was, there would always be things that would hurt him. He would always have scars on his lungs, roots tangled in his ribs, internal bleeding, shortness of breath, injuries… There would always be a million problems, one after the other. Maybe he only had a few years left.

But Eddie knew that too. He knew that sometimes he would need to take care of Steve, and that he would need to learn to control his anger better, that he would always have to be careful when he communicated a problem, that he would need to offer reassurance and remind Steve that he was loved. He knew it would be hard. He knew the risk of coming out of this with a broken heart.

Even knowing the potential disaster, Steve kissed Eddie knowing it would be worth it.

Natalie and Charlie and Joe GOLDEN GLOBES 2018

El being wholesome with Steve. El being wholesome with Steve. The weird sibling duo we didn’t know we needed. I need more of it. I might do it….no I’ve done enough of them…

Okay, okay. But just picture this:

The kids trying to embarrass Steve all the time with photos and stories to Eddie, but El ruins it every.single.time. because she is so unbelievably wholesome when it comes to Steve.

Here is everyone pulling out scoops photos (which Eddie actually loves thank you very much) and sharing stories about his failed dates. Dustin tells Eddie specifically about the time he was teaching Lucas basketball and Lucas threw the ball too hard at the backboard and hit Steve in the face.

So they are all poking fun at Steve in his and Robin’s apartment (because in every universe these platonic soulmates live together) and there is just El who randomly chimes in:

“Steve took me to this thing called a ren faire once. It was very fun. We both looked really pretty.”

Eddie absolutely melts at the story and gushes over the photos she has.

And everyone gets quiet every time, because no one wants to criticize El, but one time Max gently goes, “You know that’s like….nice right? We’re making fun of him.”

Everyone one expects her to being embarrassed or confused but instead she simple says.

“I know. I don’t like it. Steve’s nice.”

And she embarrasses everyone, except Robin and Eddie who are the only ones Steve never gets upset with when they make fun of him. They all mumble out apologies, and Steve turns to Dustin and goes:

“This is why she gets a special section in the freezer. All different flavors of eggos.”

El’s eyes get wide. “Even the blueberry ones?”

Steve gives her hair a tousle, “Especially the blueberry ones.”