Why? (A Poem)

#girlpower 

she’s an inspiration.

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My first attempt at drawing a hand. Any tips?

Society

Society can be mean most of the time

and it can make you feel like you’re in a bind.

Please don’t listen to them!

It doesn’t matter in the end.

Come take a walk with me.

Let’s go and be free.

By getting out of here...

Because to me, you are the only one that I hold dear.

Tidal Waves

It looks oh so blue,

Rushing up the beach

Seeming like it’s trying to comfort me and you.

Never being too far from our reach.

It always gives off a sort of longing,

Even when we feel content.

And when this happens, it seems like there is something missing.

Which causes us to vent.

As we vent through and through,

It causes us to feel as if we are lost in a cave.

Trying to find our way out of it without a single clue.

Oh how they keep us spinning, those blue tidal waves.

Alone

When you say “I feel so alone,”

do you really mean it?

Do you feel cold all the way down to your bones?

Do you want to go through that door you see with the sign saying exit?

When you say “I am alone,”

do you mean you have no one?

Or do you mean that deep down inside, you don’t feel whole?

Just take a minute to think of all the battles you’ve won.

Up until now,

you’ve always felt weak.

Always being the one that has to bow.

Just because you’ve never been able to freely speak.

Well, you aren’t alone...

by which I mean you aren’t alone physically.

It’s okay to let it be known...

‘Cause you aren’t the only one that wants to be free.

Free (A short poem)

Be free,

little one.

So you can see

what’s beyond the horizon.

To actually be free,

hopefully, that day will come.

To just be able to feel the breeze

that is extremely rare for some.

I want to be free.

To break away from these chains

that wear me down and to simply be

one of the ones that stops feeling pain.

Hey

Just to let you guys know -if there is anyone that actually reads my posts- feel free to message me if you want! I love talking to new people! I don't bite XD

Hate

As I stare at you

my anger and sadness increase manifold.

Someone that I thought I knew...

Yet I stand corrected as I’m forever stuck in your hold.

Looking at you reminds me of the hate

that I have for you as you look back at me with sadness.

I hate it when you give me that look. If you could just die that’d be great...

But you can’t because you’re me.... God, what a mess.

I wish I could just punch you in the face.

‘Cause it makes me relieved when I see you in pain.

To me, you’re such a disgrace...

and I hate that anything I do or say will never give me any sort of gain.

I hate that you’re me.

Which may be hard to believe....

I’m sorry for never giving us any peace...

But that’s I think when you come to see me.

“You were the only one I could count on.”

“No. I wasn’t.” I hate how he couldn’t just understand that. I hate how he makes it seem that he needs me. Like if I’m not there he’ll die.... And to think I used to like him. Don’t get me wrong. I don’t hate him... I just don’t want to have anything to do with him right now.

“What do you mean?” I read as he responds to my text.

“I am not the only one. You have a family. A mom, a dad, and you have siblings. You have other friends beside me. So just leave me alone.” As I send it, I contemplate whether or not it was the right way to go. I did mean what I said.... but I also didn’t. I did mean it when I said I wasn’t the only one. What I didn’t mean was when I told him I wanted to be left alone. I just wanted us to go back to the way things used to be. Before all of this mess came to be.

“Goodbye.”

Before I can get a reply I block him. As the phone becomes blurry I realize that I’m crying.... I wish this never happened.

Special thanks to @writing-is-ruining-my-life for the awesome prompt!

Dialogue Prompt

“You were the only one I could count on.”

“No. I wasn’t.”

Changing

No one ever said changing for the better would be easy. Sometimes, I wish I could go back to doing the things that I used to but…. When I look back at those times, I realize the same thing over and over again. There’s no point in doing something that will just hurt you more in the end.

If someone asked me what I thought about myself a month ago, I would’ve told them: “I wish I could die but not really.” Being asked the same question now, I answer with: “it’s complicated. It’s hard respecting and fully loving myself while being constantly told what my faults are.” I want more for myself. I want to care. Sure, this is actually a new thing for me. I’ll be honest with you; it’s weird and sometimes I think it’s pointless. I’m not really one for showing those closest to me how I really feel. I’m so used to hiding my feelings that now when I try to express myself it can be misunderstood.

Nowadays I am taking care of myself more and focusing on myself which has caused me to stop doing the things that I used to. I feel bad for the people I used to talk to because I never got to explain anything to them. I just had left them without saying goodbye. Sometimes I wish I could tell them what’s been going on and how I am doing but then I remember one minor detail. They don’t care about me nor will they ever. 

No matter how much I wish this wasn’t true it is…. And inevitably, I’m alone during this self-transformation for the better.