Me: They're Brats

A show Danny Motta would have incredibly mixed feelings on.

Some day I want to see a show that does the “no filler episodes” thing from the opposite direction. Just a whole season worth of low-stakes character pieces that seem to move the overall story absolutely nowhere, then episode 26 pulls all the triggers at once and this massive Rube Goldberg machine of a plot the show’s been quietly setting up in the background the whole time hits you like a truck.

Zillennial

Had a thought

Nom nom

As an AFAB with consistent nosebleeds who also frequently eats pizza asking me what the red substance on my clothes is is like playing bingo but everyone playing is blind deaf and mute. No one wins here but at the same time everyone does and also no one loses except everyone does. Is that confusing? Good, I need to take my iron supplements.

Minimalism

Queer panic

Gay panic

Pan panic

Panic

When I say that I don't want to exist right now, that doesn't mean i want to die. Not to me it doesn't. All it means is I want to disconnect from myself. To not feel my own emotions, to not hear my brain rile on and on, to not feel my skin on my body, to not feel, to not hear, to not taste, to not smell, to not see but still observe. I don't want to be interacted with like a person when I wish to not exist. I wish to a narrator, a viewer, a camera-man. I wish that I could fast forward to when this was a memory. I know it may seem concerning, or maybe a bit outlandish, but it makes sense to me. I want to not be there but still be there. I want to not be acknowledged by anyone and to simply watch. Watch others experience what's happening. And I want to not experience it. I don't want it. I just want to sit in the corner and watch. But when someone's in the corner watching, someone has to whisper. Has to ask questions. Has to make me exist. I don't want that. I don't want to exist, but I don't want to die either. It does make sense to me, but not everyone is me. I don't mind that either. But I want to be able to say that I am not existing and for people to understand. For them to not be concerned about the kid in the corner. About the guy sitting in silence. About your suspiciously quiet friend. I am simply not for now, and I hope you can accept that.

WUT

Had a thought

I can do whatever I want! I'll have an anxiety attack about it later but I can still do it!

Do i check to see if other ppl have reblogged that post before i reblog it? Yes, the anxiety is strong. I'm never safe from it. I make a post. Anxiety! I like a post. Anxiety! I make this post. Anxiety! Why? IMAGINATION MUTHERFUCKER-

I'll rant about the downsides of being a creative lil' shit another day.

Hot hot hot hot chocolate

HEY WE GOT IT