Monday Blues.

Meh.

Today has been one of those days - the ones you don't absolutely hate, but you definitely don't love either. It feels like one of those days that you could have lived without. For all those that are saying, "Oh, that means you aren't living life to the fullest! Shame on you!" please stop. You can't expect every day to be glorious and amazing. You have to have your share of good and bad days in order to appreciate life. So although today hasn't been great, tomorrow might be. Until then, I shall wait.

Time.

Time is a funny thing. It could mean everything. Or it could mean nothing.

Bridges.

"It takes both sides to build a bridge." But does it only take one side to burn it down?

Sorry.

I'm one of those people that is guilty for over-apologizing. "Sorry, I'm in your way." "Sorry, you dropped that because I distracted you." Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. To me, a sorry doesn't cost a lot and is something I don't mind giving out. However, there comes a time when you realize that the word "sorry" doesn't solve everything and that the other person truly doesn't deserve that word. Instead, I end up feeling sorry still for the other person, who is unable to see their mistakes and move past it. Just because I won't apologize doesn't mean I'm still lingering over it. Often, it means I don't care. If I've moved past it, what's keeping you from doing so at all? And so I end up feeling sorry after all. Oh, the irony.

Confrontation.

Is it better to wait it out to see what happens, or is it better just go outright and ask what's going on? What if the timing isn't right and you just messed everything up? Is it necessary to know right this instance, if nothing is really wrong? Or does the fact that the curiosity is eating at you enough to make you push for an answer? Or maybe it's just a waste of time to bother. Maybe it's all too late and the changes have already been made. And who are you to alter what's already happened?

Unsaid.

Some things are just better left unsaid. I’ve never been good with words, especially on the spot. I usually take my time to think about what I want to say and sometimes it takes me a while to respond.

But sometimes, there’s no point in saying anything more. If it’s not going to change anything or fix the problem, why say more and possibly bring more hurt? The trust has already been broken, wounds already inflicted. We can’t go back and change the past. Some mistakes you can fix, some you can’t. Forgiveness is one thing, but forgetting is another thing altogether.

So I’ll just leave it as it is.

And I Let Go.

And today, I’ve decided.

That I will let go.

Let go of the past. Of all those fond memories.

No use reminiscing the past if it’s only bringing up sad feelings.

Look at what you just lost.

Late Night Thoughts.

Insomnia strikes again. I used to have really bad insomnia in college. But after working two jobs and going to school, I wore myself out so much that I was thankful to go to bed. But it seems like my insomnia has returned. Maybe it's the coffee I had hours ago. Or maybe I just have too many thoughts in my head. Today, I thought about how fast this year has gone by. Looking back at this same day last year, things have changed so much. Last year, I was headed on the trip of a lifetime. I was on a mission trip out of the country and it was the most inspirational and amazing thing I have done thus far. Never would I have thought I would be able to last that long overseas and in those conditions I had to go through. But that was nothing. It was nothing compared to all that I saw, the things I was able to experience, the people I had met. Besides the things overseas, things at home were also completely different. Family and friends were all well, relationships with everyone were good. This year, things are a bit strained and it really bothers me that I can't fix it. Maybe it's because I lacked the courage that I had so much of last year. Or maybe it's how it's supposed to be for now. Maybe this is a lesson in life. Or maybe I should just roll to the other side of the bed and count sheep.

Why, hello there!

My first post! Hmm, what to say? 

I got nothing... Just hello! Nice to meet you! Whoever that’s reading this, that is.