Slutty Middle-aged Men Are Everything

with your help we made the postal dude dance 

i forgor to post it here

I mean he's asking nicely...

repost bc i really did not like the color version of this

i can’t believe it’s just a burning memory

she going postal on my paradise till i dude

ellsworld headcannon masterpost

ell:

leaves nice comments on her friends pics

wears mountain boots

softest hair

had a random xD furry phase

enjoys workout clothes,,, doesn’t work out

cherry cola lip balm

tallest

only uses the dog snapchat filter

sarcastic but in a nice way

loved the female ghost busters remake

buzzfeed yellow

doesn’t shave her legs

no tight clothing eVer

owns a series of funny mugs with puns and jokes on them

six scoops of sugar in her tea

hot chocolate > coffee

knows how to make instant mac and cheese/ramen (hint: that’s all she knows how to make)

tamara:

shaves nothing

pierced her own ears because tori said she was too much of a baby to actually do it

eyebrow piercing for Aesthetic™

snappy

prefers flavoured smirnoff

likes skinny jeans only if they have rips

buys her hoodies from the men’s section because pockets also fuck gender norms

nailbiter

wears crocs

ribbons!!

mismatch socks

knows all the words to Shrek the Musical

lives off of cereal

bites pens

obnoxious gum chewer

sappy drunk

winged eyeliner

matilda:

religiously paints her nails

wears the most makeup, but it’s very natural looking

eyeliner is swoopy

will paint everyone else’s nails whether they like it or not

least greasy hair

showers religiously

buys super smelly shampoo and soap

pops all the christmas crackers herself and leaves none for anyone else

always does sexy halloween costumes

loves tight fitted clothing

wears ballet flats

best kisser

updates her social media with a new selfie every .05 seconds

bad at math

will see something shiny on the ground and pick it up and keep it

hates thrift stores

the only one that uses deodorant

makes scrapbooks (it’s just pictures of her)

shaves everything everywhere

watches dubs instead of subs

buys something just because it had a nice texture

very texture reliant

can never find anything in her shoe size

frozen yogurt

tori:

listen i have a lot of feelings on tori

makes her friends wear thigh highs because Anime

subs not dubs jesus christ matilda

crop tops are super rad

the longest hair you will ever see

nails are worse than tamaras

kickboxes

has a punching bag in her room

converse!!!

favorite movie is mean girls

owns a book of snappy oneliners

loves heelies and light up shoes

passive aggressive

hides in the bushes and throws water balloons and oncoming pedestrians

shortest

took anatomy class in highschool just to dissect things

dark humor

makes fun of people that drink pumpkin spice lattes

peppermint is her favorite flavor

functions out of spite

she gets money by giving people malware

broke a kids nose in grade school cause he tried to kiss her

has a bachelors degree, but no one knows what for??? she won’t tell???

extensive first aid knowledge

does not use said knowledge

will sleep on unattended laundry

really nice if you can catch her in a good mood

genuinely hates anyone that isn’t ell or matilda

uses a flip phone

misc:

the end doesn’t happen, alright???

they’re all lesbians