Nah, Gotham ‘boutta Get A New Vigilante. I Want My Goddamn Bagel.

Crawmoms

“crayfish” is so misleading because they’re obviously not fish

just call them crawdads and go

Okay, I just spoke to my landlord. He said that I can keep my cactus, but the other plants have to go. Ms. Ivy will have to fight me before she touches my cactus. Thank you for your help!

So, I just moved to Gotham. Was no one going to tell me that having plants in my apartment was frowned upon?

Update: My entire apartment is covered in flowers.

My cactus is growing a lot more flowers than usual. It looks very pretty. Should I be alarmed, given recent events?

Can someone please tell me why HARLEEN FUCKING QUINZEL just thanked me? First the clay pots and now rogues thanking me. Also, I think I just saw the Red Hood on a roof top across from my apartment…should I be concerned?

Holy shit! You’re onto something there. So much angst potential!

Do you think the bats might see some of the fan-fiction we write? I was gonna start writing some, but what if they see it? Is it worth the risk?

Thank you for feeding us! 🙏

███████ “Delta 1-1“ ████████ From Task Force: The Anomaly

x x x/x x x/ x x x

Just a Mobile Task Force member that is far too tired and desensitized from dealing with the bullshit and trying to get a pay raise. Their “a jack of all trades is a master of none, but oftentimes better than a master of one” mindset has caused headaches with the amount of paperwork that comes with transferring from Task Force to Task Force. 

“I just want to increase my chances of survival. Why do I have to be the one thrown around like a hot potato from one to another?”

Delta will always be a nameless, faceless operator. After all, who says they can survive another day when more and more anomalies are surfacing and working with Task Force 141 will not change that. Why search for an erased identity? Why bother discovering it when the owner willingly lost it years ago?

Painting: Gassed by John Singer Sargent

Sigh, yes I know I should wait until my shadow ban is off, but I want feed the people who followed from the little time I was visible. 

@rythespy​ @sano-lost-connection ​ @sagedelasage

MC in the Anything-Verse

A/N: The Anything-verse is owned by @darklordofthesimp, please go check them out before reading. If you haven’t already read my work ‘The Trouble with Time-Loops’ on Ao3 this might not make much sense either. I do not own Call of Duty. Anyway, on to the story!

MC knew better than to interact with the two terrifying snipers on TF-141. Sunshine and Birdy. Yin and Yang. Polar opposites, yet somehow the same. Ethereal in their beauty, Professional in their field, and Utterly hopeless in each of their respective love lives. MC never really knew what to make of the two. (It didn’t help that MC hadn’t interacted with TF-141 since the Graves Incident.) The teen would only watch from the surveillance cameras as the Shakespearean tragedy unfurled through the screen.

They watched as Birdy struggled with their emotions and trauma, building up a wall that would put Jericho to shame. MC briefly wondered if König was the trumpet in that metaphor, slowly but surely breaking down those walls.

They watched as Sunshine and Ghost danced around each other and their feelings like boxers in a ring, neither willing to throw the first punch. MC had started a bet on who would confess first. Personally, they thought that someone would have to point it out before either of them actually said something. (Probably Price.)

Sometimes MC would look at the scars on each of the snipers. They can’t imagine the reminders that either must experience when they look in the mirror; the teen could sort of relate in their own fucked up way. Although, they knew that it wasn’t the same. The two adults had to go through the healing process for the marks that decorated their skin; MC hadn’t had to go through that process at all. The teen didn’t know if they should be grateful for that or not.

Sometimes when MC would wake up covered in their own blood, they’d remind themself that the two snipers had been through so much worse. The two snipers kept going on despite that. If the snipers could do it, so could they. (The teen ignores the part of their mind that tells them that the snipers were both grown adults and soldiers. The part that reminds them that they’re still just a child.)

MC knew better than to interact with the two terrifying snipers on TF-141. Sunshine and Birdy. Yin and Yang. Polar opposites, yet somehow the same. The main characters in a Shakespearean tragedy where hubris will lead to their downfall. MC never really liked plays. (They didn’t like sad endings either.) The teen was tired of watching the drama on the screen.

Hey, I've got your phone. Red Hood decided to send it to the archives. It'll be back by tonight.

Oh thank goodness. I can pick it up if that’s easier. The vines are a little hostile towards visitors right now.

Ah, good to know. I might write a Batman x Bruce Wayne fic then.

Do you think the bats might see some of the fan-fiction we write? I was gonna start writing some, but what if they see it? Is it worth the risk?

Do you think the bats might see some of the fan-fiction we write? I was gonna start writing some, but what if they see it? Is it worth the risk?