No Anatomy Just Darkness

ha HA I have located this amazing post at last!

bruce wayne maintains a presence on all conspiracy theory boards with the screen name BruceWayneIsTheBatman and all his posts have titles like “BRUCE WAINE IS BAT-MAN INDISPUTABLE PROOF” and it’s just a picture of Bruce Wayne from the back next to a picture of Batman from behind and they both have the contours of their butt drawn on in a shitty MSPaint red line (note: Bruce is in a suit and Batman has a cape, neither of their butts are clearly discernible) and the quote “THE BUTTS MATCH!!! THE FACTS DON’T LIE!!!!!” and he makes at least three of these posts a day, and “Bruce Wayne is the Batman” becomes a meme a la “Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer” and he gets asked about it on a talk show and he laughs uproariously at the idea and Stephen Colbert just HAPPENS to have a batman mask under the desk and they do a bit together where Bruce Wayne puts on the mask and walks around saying things like “excuse me, bank robbers, can I perhaps offer you some money to stop you robbing this bank?” and “I say, cease and desist your criminal behavior or I’ll have my butler ask you to leave” and the audience is LOSING THEIR MINDS laughing at the idea of this pampered rich guy taking on the Joker on a bi-weekly basis and then anyone who suggests “Bruce Wayne is Batman” in earnest gets met with mocking “oh man do the butts match” comments

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Yo, correct me if I am wrong please, but didn't Hitler rise to power because he promised to fix the German economy and people really liked that so they looked past everything else he was doing??? Like exactly what's happening in America right now???

So many people said they voted for Trump, put a truly evil person in power, because he said he'd fix the economy, and a little voice in my head is going, "Isn't that what happened with fucking Hitler??"

But I've seen no one point that out so maybe I'm miss remembering???????

Just a silly lil stupid idea I wanted to share after Ithica saga because lord knows we need it after that

But just imagine after he gets home, Odysseus & Telemachus are playing on the beach & Telemachus decides to run into the water. Ody chases after him, but when he gets to the water’s edge it quickly recedes around him to the point where it’s obvious it’s avoiding him. & to be funny, Telemachus jokes “I think Poseidon’s afraid of you, father”

& without missing a beat, he goes “he doesn’t have to be. I’m home now” & now Telemachus is like 👀👀👀 cause what the hell is THAT supposed to mean

Odysseus just smirks & cups his hands around his mouth & yells something like “I promise I won’t stab you again!” What? He can show off & brag to his son

& then a huge wave crashes straight into Ody & knocks him flat on his ass

I thought Dick was just Like That but it turns out he got it from his dad aww

why Bruce is so goddamn girly pop

AAAAH I WANT THIS IT FEELS SO RIGHT

Superbat soulmate idea

Soulmate au where your soulmate's biggest secret is written somewhere on your body. But instead of Clark and Bruce's saying "I am Batman" and "I am Superman" they say "I am Bruce Wayne" and "I am Clark Kent"

Cue them meeting in civilian persona (Bruce is a detective and Clark is a journalist, of course they find out who the names belong to) and they end up dating. Neither of them find the marks too weird. With Bruce "billionaire and common kidnapping victim" Wayne, and Clark "reporter and probably has a lot of enemies because of this" Kent, they assume the other just doesn't like blurting out who they are if they don't have to.

So they date. And it's fine. But it feels like something is missing. Feels like the relationship is being forced despite their obvious bond.

Meanwhile Batman "I would rather die than let anyone know I'm a human who has emotions" and Superman "I need to protect those I love by not letting people know who my civilian identity is" are slowly learning to trust and depend on each other and are growing closer in a more natural way than their counterparts. Until something happens where they have to reveal their secret identities to each other.

Sad Alfred nooooo

I imagine alfred combed all the robins' hair in the middle section since they were kids (and they're still doing it) only damian's the only one who's been able to escape this fate

I’m sorry, SKIBIDI DIE?!

Skibidi die.

Ooooooooh my gosh

Bruce, visibly overwhelmed by Emotions as he watches a ten-year-old Dick goofing around in the batcave: Alfred. Alfred I think I'd die if something happened to him

Alfred: *carefully doesn't say that he thought the same thing when Martha and Thomas placed a newborn Bruce in his arms for the first time because he knows that'll completely destroy the little emotional bandwidth Bruce has*