I Hate Asking For Things

Time blindness is the weirdest aspect of executive dysfunction and so weird as an experience to live with. It’s like you see the clock, the clock says 3pm, you look at the clock again and it’s 3:02, then 3:05, and then you look again and it’s 8pm and WHAT THE FUCK.

You don’t even need hyperfocus. But hyperfocus is like the Warp Speed:tm: version cause when that hits, it’s 3pm and then it’s the next day and why is the sun rising and when did i last eat and oh god i need to use the bathroom. And oh, also, you’re EXHAUSTED. The act of your brain tunnel visioning on something drains you (but that’s another topic).

Time blindness is…. having the general knowledge that today is Wednesday, and you need to do something on Thursday. Thursday is logically tomorrow, but the mysterious void of time is like ‘that’s like next week or something.’  It’s knowing you have to do something in three weeks on the 21st. And as the days creep closer, the 21st is stuck in a constant state of still being 3 weeks away, despite the fact it’s now tomorrow.

It’s wild. ADHD is literally living in a constant state of “There is Now. And there is Later.” and there’s no in between; no dates, no times; no hours, weeks, or months. It’s just Now and Later, and oh god why is is X o’clock already!?

really crazy how much one (1) friend hang out can do for your mental health. do people know about this?

no one really needs me and that makes me really fucking sad 

Evan: If your house was on fire, and you could only take one thing, what would you take?

Connor: a nap.

Evan: Connor, no.

character concept: the best trick archer in the world, the trick to which is that he’s actually not an archer at all, he’s a speedster and he can’t aim for shit, every time he takes a shot he actually just grabs the arrow, runs over to what he wants to stick, then runs back before anyone can see him move

I’m actually really not feeling very well.

My problem with studying

Before I start here’s some background on me:

I love procrastinating

I have horrible anxiety

I am depressed

Now that’s out of the way here’s the problem, so I already don’t wanna do my work. After school my brain is fried from everything being crammed into my brain.

My anxiety is telling me “You have to study! If you don’t you’ll fail and everyone will hate you!”

But my depression is telling me “It doesn’t matter if you study, you’ll fail anyone and everyone already hates you.”

So I’m stuck in an endless cycle of battling myself until I break down crying and forcing myself to put what little energy I have left into homework/studying.

Best part is, I’m procrastinating right now.

Orpheus saving Hades' marriage only for Hades' to destroy Orpheus' marriage and accept no blame because Orpheus looked back of his own accord is the biggest reflection of today's society in Hadestown.

No matter how hard you work for the rich, they will pay you pennies then blame you for being poor.

Dog owners please be aware.

This is disturbingly accurate.