When Ur A Gay Af 12 Year Old But Ur Parents Think You Bought A Spice Girls Poster Because U Fancy Emma

U know when ur sexting someone and he’s like ‘hmm send me a photo of what u look like now 😜😜🤪🤪🤪’.... sir, I am in an Argos calm tf down david bailey

youth dystopian novel protagonist: i guess you could say there’s a darkness in me. i’m not normal. never have been barista at jamba juice: ma’am are you going to order anything

FINISH HIM

Shook my rug for the first time in 6 months releasing over a kilo of dust, three migrating albatrosses and the stampede from the Lion King

me

Jay Z: Your breasteses is my breakfast 

Me:

when i actually try to make myself look good for once

Ted Allen: You have 30 seconds left, chefs.

Chef: I looked down at my dish and realized it needed a little more color, so I decide to make a quick purée out of lima beans and hot raspberry sauce, then brûlée the top with a blowtorch and add a few mint leaves to really give it some texture.

Me: *pterodactyl screech*

Hi