Emotional Cannibal Blowjobs

Sometimes I just like to be happy

That cinnamon rolls with icing are an actual thing. I feel like people don't appreciate that enough.

AJJDKFKLVLXJH LMAO

Gotta say

Yeah the civil war trailer was pretty angst filled, with the team splitting and otps dying and being born, but the only thing that made me actually react was Rhodey. What happened? Is he okay? Will my summer sun cinnamon roll be ok? These are questions I need answered.

honestly, imagine your otp

When you see your friend in public

Scientist: *sees a spider with long legs* Scientist: I think I’ll call it daddy…… Daddy long legs

The trick to making friends is to make as many unidentifiable screeches as possible. Trust me i have “friend”

I just snorted so hard in the middle of a restaurant

The word “discourse” is ruined for me forever, maybe even more than the word “problematic”

Like this New Testament professor I was listening to the other day kept talking about “the discourses of Matthew” and all I could think about was like, Jesus accusing the pharisees of being messiahphobic

You go girl!