HC That Lois, Iris, And Dinah Have Girls’ Night And Invite Bruce So They Can Spend The Entire Time

Dick Grayson, age 10, self proclaimed master gymnast, but he’s more well known as Robin, Batman’s first sidekick. Right now he had managed to get ahold of his father’s cowl and cape. It was far too big for him of course, but that didn’t stop him messily putting it on. Speaking in the most deep and gravely voice the small boy could muster he said to himself, “I’m the night.”

He giggled, until he felt a tap to his shoulder. He turned around and saw the Batman himself giving him an unamused look.

“I am the night. You however-” he lightly tapped his forehead “-are my star.”

Loki: I'm lowkey awesome

Peter: ₒₕ! ₕᵢ ₘᵣ. ₗₒₖᵢ ₐwₑₛₒₘₑ

Loki: No that's not what I-

Peter: *confused puppy dog eyes*

Loki: -am Lowkey awesome, aren't I?

bruce wayne is really into greek mythology and he'll infodump about it to anyone that'll listen

Comparing Dick and Jason’s early days with Bruce is so funny, it’s just the opposite of what you’d expect. 

Jason: “wow, I get to live in a mansion!” “and now I get to be Robin?!” “this is awesome!” “let me get to work on that homework now Bruce so we can patrol later” “being Robin gives me magic” :D

Dick: “my parents are dead” “Mr. Wayne is never around” “everything is terrible” “i’m going to sneak out of the house” “Batman, let me kill a man”

greetings, crowbarman

Police: Mr. Wayne sir, your child has been kidnapped.

Bruce: Which one?

Police: the kidnapper didn’t say. But witnesses claimed to see someone with black hair and lightish eyes. The kidnapper left a note threatening to orphan them for the second time.

Bruce:

tim drake’s snapchat is 90% him making bruce wayne do normal middle-class american things and filming the results. popular youtube compilations include the one where they’re at denny’s at two in the morning and tim keeps trying to get bruce to order a moon over my hammy just so he’ll have to say it, the one where they’re at disneyworld and bruce gets increasingly frazzled culminating in him actually physically picking up gaston for reasons no one can entirely recall, and everyone’s favorite series “bruce wayne doesn’t understand walmart”

"Tell him to get in line"

"But Alfreeed. I'm trying to look cool in my sunglasses ☹"

Tony: Kid, why do you have bruises on your neck??

Peter, too embarrassed to say that he fell down the stairs: ummm... hickeys??

Tony: the fu- KEENER GET YOUR SORRY ASS HERE RIGHT NOW!!!

Peter: wtf???