Thought #132

“What? Like, a disabled protagonist? How would that even work? How could someone with a disability be the hero in an action show?” local anime trash boy wonders while sitting next to his box sets of Full Metal Alchemist, showing no hint of irony or self awareness. 

Damian: there are 11 people in this room if you count Drake and Titus

IF YOURE EGYPTIAN AND LGBTQ+ GET OFF ANY QUEER DATING SITES, THE POLICE ARE TRACKING AND HUNTING PEOPLE DOWN AGAIN. DELETE YOUR ACCOUNTS.

Just an experiment. Reblog if you actually give a fuck about male victims of domestic violence and rape.

Of fucking course

What sick bastard doesn’t

twilight but instead of a dramatic reveal about how edward’s a vampire bella just shows up to class one day and slides a copy of Dracula across the table to see what happens 

Writer's Guide: Hand to Hand Combat

Your character is unarmed and all they have left to fight with is their bare hands. If they hope for the enemy to catch their hands, you will have to write an effective scene. So how can we write a good hand to hand combat scene?

Most Common Moves

Now, I'm not going to list 30+ martial arts moves. Most of your characters will not be masters of kung fu or mixed martial arts. Most people who get into fights are novices.

Punch: a punch is probably to go to strike. Try not punch anybody in the face because one, they will expect it and two, it will hurt your hand. If you can aim for the soft parts of an opponent, kidneys or gut.

Kick: Kicking isn't pretty but it is effective. A good swift kick to the back of somebody's knee will fold them like a lawnchair.

Go for the groin: Man or woman getting kicked in the nether regions is no picnic. A good swift kick with your foot or your knee can incapacitate your opponent. Its not the most honourable of moves but it works.

An Elbow strike is effective: The elbow is your strongest point of attack. Drive it in to a windpipe or a gut and you can but yourself valuable time to retreat or stall your opponent from answering back.

Eyes: they are weak points. Jab somebody in the eyes with a thumb and they will stop in their tracks.

Throat: You can end any fight by going straight for the throat either grasping it in a headlock or jabbing it with a fist which can collapse the windpipe.

Bite: If you are unable to snack your opponent, use your teeth. The human bite is perhaps not as strong as a hyena's but it is strong enough to shorten your opponent by a finger or two.

How to Escape from Grips and Holds

Pinned from behind with your arms pinned: You have to stop your opponent from getting to a headlock. Move your hips to one side and strike backwards toward the groin or gut. This should weaken the hold of your opponent. Once the grip is loosened, turn toward your opponent and snack them into the nose with the heel of your hand.

Held from behind: Bend forward as far as you can making it more difficult for your opponent to lift you. Jab with your elbows back into your opponent's chest or face. Turn toward your opponent once the grip loosens and strike at the face or the groin again to subdue your opponent.

Headlock: If your opponent has you in a headlock, DON'T STRUGGLE. You could break your own neck. Turn into your opponent's side as close as possible. With your hand that is furthest away, hit your opponent into the groin or gut.

Pinned down on the ground: Most likely your opponent is using their own hands and weight to keep you down. If you can move your knees, try to jab them in the side or the groin to unbalanced them.

Things to Remember

1. The whole 6-10 minute bout only happens in films or controlled sporting events. Fights are usually over within a few minutes. (when writing effective fights, keep the pace short.)

2. Girls are vicious. I've worked in nightclubs and broke up a fair few fights. Boys will knock the shit out of each other but girls will tear shreds out of each other. I have known grown men to break up fights between guys but nobody wants to break up a catfight.

3. One wants the fight to end quickly. If you keep slugging at each other, you'll get tired pretty fast. Have your character try end the fight as soon as possible.

4. Nobody emerges from fights unscathed. Even winners may come out with black eyes, broken noses or at very least a broken lip. If you punch someone, you will likely bruise your knuckles if not split them.

5. If your character is fighting to survive, they don't have to stick to etiquette. They will have to do anything to survive even if it means doing something unpleasant like fishhooking or hairpulling.

hi grandma! i’ve written most of my story, but i skipped over the fight scene in the middle bc i was struggling with writing it. do you have any tips for writing fight scenes?

Hi anon!

Ah, fight scenes.

Don't try to focus too much on descriptions of every move in the fight. Writing is not a visual art form and putting too much emphasis on how the characters are moving their bodies (or weapons) will take too much emphasis off why they are fighting. In visual art, like movies, they can use music/facial expressions/lighting to create an atmosphere that keeps you in the moment of why the characters are fighting.

Also, visually? Fights are exciting.

I do have some tips for writing -

Beneath this cut is violence/blood.

Pick your words wisely Why are they fighting? Desperation? Anger? Fear? If you're fighting out of desperation, like a fight for your life then you'd pick words to convey that sense of absolute urgency. Your descriptions would focus on how close you are to losing and your character would always be trying to either get away or end the fight as fast as possible. If anger, your concentrate is like a rage and your words would feel/sound violent and their concentrate is on destroying what they're up against. Etc.

Use the length of your sentences to convey the pacing of your fight. For a fast, desperate fight you would either use shorter sentences or longer ones with short clauses conveying a lot of action. For slower fights, you can throw in more introspection and use sentences as normal.

Keep track of limbs and injuries If someone has been stabbed in the left arm, that's now a weakness. The fight should be changed because of it. Also, nothing worse than finishing your fight scene, getting ready to pat yourself on the back and realizing you gave Bertidude the Bouncer 3 arms.

Create a sense of space for yourself before you start writing or your fight will get out of hand. Unless they're on a literal meadow, there's almost always obstacles and boundaries to your fight.

An example of a fast, desperate fight:

(WHEN I STARTED WRITING THIS I DIDN'T INTEND DOMESTIC ASSAULT BUT IT HAPPENED SO TW: DOMESTIC ASSAULT)

The sting of the first hit hadn't even faded off her face before he was rearing his arm back to strike again. There weren't many options, with his other hand fisted in her jacket and her back up against the wall. He was expecting nothing of her but what he'd always gotten, a meek acceptance of the things he did to her. He wasn't guarding himself, he wasn't braced for attack, he was set to hit her until his arm got tired. But he'd forgotten the knife in her hand, from the vegetables he'd insisted she chop. He'd forgotten it, she'd forgotten it, until the fast-fast beat of her heart felt like it was jumping into her throat and the paralyzing reality that she fought now or she fought never. He wasn't and she wasn't expecting how the knife seemed to quiver in her fist, how the tip of the blade must have struck a bone, how it vibrated up her arm and up his. His fist tightened reflexively and then loosened. He hit he'd aimed for her face landed against the wall. He was gasping, stuck like a pig, leaning into her space, staring down how she was staring down at the slimy string of blood running over her fingers.

Short, fast clauses, a bit of repetition, it was a short fight so far but someone has been stabbed.

A slower, chill fight:

A gentleman provided the opportunity for his opponent to make an ass of himself. Bertitude was nothing if he was not a gentleman, and that was why he had not so much as lifted his arms in attempt to defend himself. Not that there would be much need to defend himself from the jumpy little man shifting his weight from foot to foot in front of him. While most civilized men who found themselves engaging in fisticuffs had the good sense not to use the moves they learned from video games, this clown before him seemed to be doing his best to imitate the character selection screen of a street fighting game. God help them all if he tried for an uppercut, or this whole fight was going to end before it started. Bertie's mother had always told him not to hit a stupid person because they couldn't afford to lose the brain cells. Still, by the time this rabbit of a man finally closed the gap between them, the crowd had gone quiet for lack of gleeful anticipation. They knew, how Bertie knew, that it wouldn't take much more than a solid thump on the head to knock this man flat. He was torn between letting him get a shot in and putting him out of his misery. He hadn't quite decided when the wee bunny man jabbed him in the chest with his fists one after another. A lack of training, experience and sense to be humiliated by himself rendered the attempt to punch him an utter failure. Bertie was practically performing a civil service, punching the restless chipmunk man in the face hard enough to send him falling over backward. He hit the concrete with a spattering of metal sounds, all the bits and bobs attached to his jacket making a ruckus of a noise. The only sound he made was a groan (and not of embarrassment) that could barely be heard over the crowd leisurely working its way back inside.

My copy of Dark Puppetry just came in the mail and I'm so excited about it!!

@darkpuppetry @evyptids @shadowstakeall @beerecordings @spicydanhowell @kisstheashes and @plutoandpolaris I'm so excited to read your stories!!

And @spicydanhowell and @jacksoopticboop the beautiful cover is beautiful!!

You guys are all awesome, and I am so happy I bought this!!

stop adding quirky commentary to video subtitles challenge!

they’re not there for fun, they’re there to make the video more accessible to disabled people and hard of hearing folk!

using them as tools for fun takes away from their goddamn purpose and turns them into a toy instead of a tool.

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