#2: Inej

So true lmao 🤣

Jesper be jealous 😜

kaz giving nikolai his cane was the ultimate bromance move do not even try to argue with me

I write a fanfiction about Kaz having a sister in Wattpad, named Adjala Brekker. And I just got the craziest idea. Kaz is always the baby sitter for Adjala's kids so why not write headcannons?

So I just made a few headcannons about Kaz babysitting his niece Jordan, and his two nephews Johannes and Kaz jr.

( Everytime you see a mom approved, it means the kids' mother approves of the activity )

1. "Uncle Kaz's House of Schemes": Kaz turns babysitting into a series of elaborate games and puzzles for the kids. It's like a mini heist every time they visit, complete with clues and riddles to keep them entertained. (Mum approved)

2. Kaz's version of "nap time" is "quiet planning time": When it's time for the kids to take a nap, Kaz uses this opportunity to quietly plan his next big scheme. He's convinced they're the perfect cover for his brainstorming sessions. (Mum approved)

3. Candy heist training: Kaz teaches the kids the fine art of candy heists, complete with disguises, diversion tactics, and a secret candy stash. They're the most resourceful trick-or-treaters in Ketterdam. (Mum not approved)

4. The "Ingenious Bedtime Routine": Kaz has a knack for getting kids to bed without fuss. His secret? He tells them thrilling stories about his heists until they're too excited to stay awake. (Mum approved)

5. Tiny suits and dresses: Kaz insists that the kids wear tiny suits and dresses, just like him, when they go out together. It's a comical sight seeing them dressed as miniature versions of him. (Hehe definitely mum approved)

6. Teaching the art of negotiation: Kaz imparts his negotiating skills to the kids, coaching them on how to haggle with street vendors for the best deals on toys and treats. They quickly become savvy little traders. They negotiate with daddy alot too, and their daddy always falls for this (Their dad hates this, so mum approved)

7. The "Kaz Jr. Inheritance Fund": Kaz secretly sets up a savings account for each of the kids, earmarking it as their "inheritance." He insists they learn about managing their finances from an early age. (Uncle Jes and Mumma approved)

8. "The Kaz Bunker" (my fav) : In the event of a "Kaz-sized emergency," he's built a secret bunker (a well-fortified blanket fort) in the living room. It's the perfect hiding spot for epic pillow fights and strategizing. (There's photo evidence -Inej) [mum approved - Kaz's sister]

9. Poker night (ft. Uncle jes, Daddy and uncle Wy) : Kaz introduces the kids to poker night, using candies as chips. It's all in good fun until Jesper's uncanny ability to bluff leaves Kaz Jr and Johannes with an empty stash of candy, while Jordie has a whole lot to herself. Wylan always gives his candy to Kaz jr in the end. Elijah (the kids' dad) sits their and sticks his tongue out to his brother in-law whenever he wins, only to me met by the Lethal Brekker sibling glower. (The mother doesn't aprove of this, their dad does tho)

10. Lessons in lockpicking (childproof, of course): Kaz teaches the kids the basics of lockpicking, with a set of child-friendly locks and tools. They think it's just a game, but it's secretly a life skill. (The parents don't aprove since candy is always being stolen from the kitchen)

11. Kaz and naps : when the kids' parents get back from date night of smth, they see uncle Kaz and the kids in the Kaz Bunker fort, or all of them on the ground, surrounded my toys and Kaz is laying flat on his stomach and Kaz jr is snoozing on top of him and Jordan and Johannes are snoozing in the corner. This, ladies and gentlemen, is how the bastard of the barrel gets his sleep. (Inej has photo evidence) [Daddy and mumma approved]

12: Lifeskills (ft. Uncle Matty, aunty 'nej and aunty Ninny) : so Kaz gets his gang together to preach Lifeskills to his nephews and niece. Uncle Matty adores the mini demjins. Aunty 'nej takes them in sea trips (Aunty ninny brings the snacks) [ pappa and mumma approved]

13. Shark stare classes 101: in which Kaz teaches his little trainees the signature bombastic side eye and shark like stare, along with the lethal Brekker glower, which always has the kids' dad running for the HILLS, cuz they look like his scary wife and terrifying brother in law. (Daddy and Mumma approved ladies and gentlemen)

A fanfic for this :

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Kaz brekker's baby sitting

CONTEXT ; adjala brekker is kazs adopted sister (and shes suli) and elijah rollins is Pekkas illegitamate disowned son (adjalas husband) and

I'm tagging a few of the biggest SoC enthusiasts I know : @she-posts-nerdy-stuff @ell0ra-br3kk3r-writes @marsconer

I woke up and chose violence

HOT TAKE

Am I the only one who thinks Avery is a bit boring?

Like her only personality trait is obsessing over the Hawthornes, and being SmArT

Gurl 🙄✋

In my native place we call PPL like her desperate, we call them hens💀—

Sorry someone had to

Literally me trying to find her personality

I'm sorry Avery stans but I had to say it.....

No hate to jlb or Avery

She's just like Bella swan tho 💀

Lowkey think the latter is better

Like Avery is SO dem full of herself

Eg

Extert from the Hawthorne Legacy

“Thea's poker face was good, but mine was better”

Gurl stop.

I know ppl who coul have your eyes out on a platter

And the famous quote of hers is -

“My house my rules.”

My honest opinion -

A) Did she actually say that?

B) You know who else says this? My mom

And after she donates the money she's like

“oH mY gAwD iM sOoO kInD”

*wheeze

I cant—

We KNOW you donated like 94% of the money (which was pretty dumb u could've donated like 50%) [Tobias' ghost is having a seizure]

You don't have to RUB IT IN OUT FACES OMG

At some points in the book I wanted to jump in and beat her up.

Next hot take -

Jameson's mid asf

#3 : Wylan and Jesper

They're the same people your honour

Tags: @bookworm-center @wraith--2 @ell0ra-br3kk3r @she-posts-nerdy-stuff

Am I the only one who thinks Kaz Brekker is like the boss baby??

@jccatstudios @she-posts-nerdy-stuff @bookworm-center @wraith--2

Amita Suman looks amazing.

And one of my "friends" says she doesn't look good.

( she *the friend* needs to get her eyes checked)

I love amita sm. She's my queen. - Me ( my gay ass)

UNCLE KAZ (pt 2)

since y'all loved my other uncle kaz headcannons sm, heres a pt two,

ps the kids mums name is adjala and dads name is elijah.

The Fainting Uncle: When Adjala goes into labor and Kaz is present in the room, he's initially composed, giving Adjala reassuring nods and words of encouragement. However, when he catches sight of the baby crowning, he turns a shade paler than his usual self and promptly faints. The midwives tend to him while Adjala rolls her eyes, muttering, "saints kaz"

The Baby's Name: Adjala decides to name her newborn son after her beloved older brother, Kaz. She names him Kaz Jr., partly as a tribute and partly to amuse herself with the idea of two Kazs in the family.

Kaz, the Doting Uncle: From the moment Kaz Jr. is born, Kaz takes his role as the baby's uncle incredibly seriously. He insists on holding the baby at every opportunity and is often seen carrying him around like a prized possession.

"My Little Investment": Kaz affectionately refers to Kaz Jr. as his "little investment." He's determined to educate the baby early on about the world of finance and heists. While other babies are being read fairy tales, Kaz is explaining the intricacies of stock markets and the art of the perfect heist.

Baby-Sitting Extraordinaire: Kaz eagerly volunteers to babysit Kaz Jr. whenever Adjala and Elijah need a break. He sets up elaborate baby-proofed rooms filled with educational toys and books about economics.

Parenting Advice: Kaz doesn't hesitate to give Adjala and Elijah unsolicited parenting advice. He'll lecture them about the importance of diversifying their baby's nutrition (he's already planning a menu with a variety of baby foods), and he's convinced that baby Kaz Jr. should have a secure financial future from day one.

Stock Market Bedtime Stories: Instead of traditional bedtime stories, Kaz regales Kaz Jr. with tales of stock market successes and legendary heists. The baby may not understand it all yet, but he's learning to recognize his uncle's voice and find comfort in those stories.

Playdates with Inej: Inej becomes Kaz Jr.'s honorary aunt, and she and Kaz plan playdates filled with activities that are a blend of physical fitness, stealth training, and finance lessons. They're convinced the baby will grow up to be a financial genius with ninja-like agility.

Protective Uncle Mode: Kaz can't help but be overprotective of Kaz Jr. He's been through too much in his own life, and he's determined to shield his nephew from the harshness of the world. He's the uncle who insists on the sturdiest crib, the safest car seat, and the most secure locks on the doors.

Family Bonding: Despite his eccentricities, Kaz's love for Kaz Jr. is unwavering. He sees the baby as a symbol of hope and a chance for a brighter future. Through all the stock market talks and heist stories, there's a genuine and deep bond forming between the two, one that will last a lifetime.

God. To all the authors who write Kaz x Oc fanfictions like this. I fucking can't with the Kaz Brekker x Oc fanfictions. They paint Inej as this jealous bitchy girl who obsesses over Kaz who's into the Oc with the fucking flat personality. Are y'all fucking dumb? Inej Ghafa is a girl who went through sexual abuse. And your trying to make her trauma look tiny infront of your fucking Oc (who btw is useless and bitchy) by making the Oc survive in a brothel from age 12 to 25 or smth. Sexual abuse is sexual abuse. Regardless of how long one endured it. And as an S.A surviver, I can say that is true. And y'all paint Inej as a jealous bitchy girl. When in reality, she'd be happy for Kaz, that he found someone who loves him the way he is. She'd never be jealous of the girl, she'd be sad, but sadness and jealousy are NOT the same.

And if Kaz chose the boring Oc, his loss.

Cuz I'll go and marry Inej myself.

And I can confidently say that Inej is a million times better than the Flat personalitied Oc.

I WANT ALL OF THEM IN MY LIFE 😭😭

I claim the brains ones!!!!

Tag yourself: Shadow and Bone edition

What kind of friend are you?

(based on this post)

So, I’m a Writer on Wattpad with a pretty good fan following. I write SoC fanfiction. But the things which get to me and INFURIATES me are the smutty Kaz x Oc fanfictions. Kaz Brekker is a boy who can’t even stand skin to skin. A boy who fainted in a prison cart cuz of PTSD. As a person with touch phobia and PTSD, it's fucking impossible to touch the PPL you love with your trauma. And Like y’all are coming at me with the smutty Kaz x Oc fanfictions, and making me sick. I mean smut is okay, but Kaz Brekker is a boy who fell in love with Inej Ghafa ( his ONE and ONLY true love ) within two fucking years. And if you tell me he's having sex with your fucking Oc who has a friggin flat personality and like SeVeRe (fake) TrAuMa within A DAMN WEEK of knowing eachother I—I, I have no damn words.

My heart just exploded