Moving To College Is Weird. I’m Not Sure I Like It Yet

Quite accurate

The autistic experience is wanting to be an artist, a writer, a baker, an animator, a mother, somebodies wife, be totally independent, have a large friend group, only have one friend, move away and never speak to anyone ever again, never leave home, collect stuffed animals, heal your inner child, be a grown up, stay young at heart, get a job but not something you aren’t passionate about, eat safe foods, hate your safe foods because you’ve eaten them too much, scream and cry about how you feel like no one understands and you don’t fit in, love being different and not fitting in and not being able to do any of it because the seam of your sock isn’t sitting correctly.

Me when my friend says they finished writing another chapter of their book but I can’t read it yet

I’ll make an entire dedicated blog post about it just for you my mysterious tumblr mutual. It probably won’t be until after Christmas but it’ll happen this week for sure. Probably.

"Have you been avoiding me?"

"What?! Me? Nah… it's not like i, uh, caught feeling for you and now I'm having literally the worst existential crisis ever" starts hyperventilating "what reason could i possibly have to avoid YoU" chuckles awkwardly while trying to catch his breath

No. I don’t wanna. My WIP will wait for me like it always has (I’ve got serious writers block rn and am taking a break from writing)

My fella, I feel this on a deeply personal level. All we can do is keep trying. It’s not gonna work all the time, hard days will happen. But just keep trying every day. Any small victory is a victory worth celebrating. Keep on being you mate. You’re worth so much more than you could believe.

TRIGGER WARNING - low self esteem and self worth

I’m always trying to be positive and trying to love myself but sometimes I can’t help but wish I wasn’t autistic.

Maybe people would accept if I wasn’t so different

Maybe i would be enough if I was able to just know what to do like everyone else

Maybe people would stay

Maybe they would love me…

Heck yeah

I am very grateful for the Wolfenstein reboots and the Sniper Elite games because while gaming as an art form has come a long way and all the beautiful stories and complex characters are really wonderful and important, sometimes we need to remember our heritage as gamers, go back to our roots for a bit, and shoot a bunch of nazis in the face

I finally got around to watching Secret Level, and boy was I not disappointed by the Warhammer 40K episode. Having only gotten into 40K within the last year, I gotta say that Daemon had such a cool design, but there was no way it had a chance against my boy Titus. Like I’m sorry. I may be new but even I know that named characters in this setting are not going to lose to some unnamed enemy.

Happy New Year to my fellow gremlins, hope you all have a grand old time and achieve all you want to achieve

Having friends who have discounts at good food places is so nice lol. I just met this person, who calls me a friend almost immediately, and takes me and two others to Chick-fil-a. I have no idea what I’m gonna do to repay this, but you can bet your soul I’ll find something.

Have some choccy milk. You deserve it!