Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us

Nanami SMAU - A Verdict of Us

Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us

Summary: Kento Nanami was perfect—disciplined, untouchable, and entirely focused on his future. Emotions didn’t fit into his plans.

You were everything he avoided—bold, warm, and impossible to ignore. You told yourself he didn’t matter, but you couldn’t stop watching him.

He never looked your way. Not until the day his perfectly controlled world unraveled, and you were at the center of it.

tropes: she fell first, he fell harder, academic rivalry (kinda onesided)

an: I hereby welcome you to my second smau fic lol. hope you guys like it as much as I do. In case of any confusion: Nanami’s reader and Toji’s reader are close friends. I hope the first chapter will answer some of your questions. 💋💋💋

{next}

Main Cast:

Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us

More Posts from Thefemmefatalexo and Others

2 months ago

just read the nanami smau fic and GOD it's so good, thank you for writing such a gut-wrenching fic 🫶🏼

it’s my pleasure 😁


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1 month ago

Nanami SMAU - A Verdict of Us

Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us

Chapter 16 - Under The Influence

Summary: Kento Nanami was perfect—disciplined, untouchable, and entirely focused on his future. Emotions didn’t fit into his plans. You were everything he avoided—bold, warm, and impossible to ignore. You told yourself he didn’t matter, but you couldn’t stop watching him.

He never looked your way. Not until the day his perfectly controlled world unraveled, and you were at the center of it.

cw: mentions of excessive drinking

an: don’t get your hopes up y’all. SMOOCHES 💋💋💋

}chapter 15} ; {next}

taglist: @giasssslife @getovibesonly @inthedarkshadows000 @burpzz @sleepykittyenergy @fuzzycollectiondeersblog @hana-patata @sosole @mysteriaqueen @watasinekoru @linny-bloggs

࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us

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4 months ago

Toji SMAU - When love was always there

Toji SMAU - When Love Was Always There

Chapter 11 - Dinner and Disdain

Summary: You see him again on your first day of college. Fuck. Toji Zenin has been the bane of your existence since your first day of kindergarten. Over the 15 years you’ve had the “pleasure” of knowing him, he’s made it his personal mission to make your life a living hell. From chopping off your hair in kindergarten to pushing you into a pond on your first day of high school, Toji has done it all. You’d always thought he would choose a college far away from you, but as it has always been, fate came to kick your ass. Hard.

warnings: cursing, sexual language, mentions of bullying

an: how we doing…? SMOOCHES 💋💋💋

{chapter 10} ; {next}

taglist: @jinxiewritings @actuallyvalerie

࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

The dining room was tense, the air thick with unsaid words and resentments. Toji sat across the table from you, his head tilted slightly, eyes cast downward, focusing intently on the food on his plate. The clinking of silverware was the only noise cutting through the silence between you both. Your parents and his adoptive parents chatted away like old friends, their laughter and warm tones only emphasizing the heavy wall between you and him.

“Y/N, you barely touched your food,” your mom said, her voice cutting through your quiet frustration.

“I’m fine, Mom,” you said quickly, stabbing at a piece of broccoli just to stop her from asking again.

Toji’s mother, a kind woman with a perpetual smile, glanced at him. “And Toji, you’ve barely said two words all evening.”

Toji grunted, his usual noncommittal response, shoving another forkful of food into his mouth.

The parents exchanged looks but didn’t push. Soon enough, they excused themselves to enjoy the garden, leaving you and Toji to clean up the aftermath.

You immediately got up, stacking plates in silence. Toji did the same, moving with the kind of deliberate awkwardness that came when two people who desperately didn’t want to be near each other had no choice.

The sound of water running in the sink filled the void as you scrubbed at the dishes, refusing to look at him. Toji stood a few feet away, drying off a plate. He kept glancing at you, opening his mouth once, then shutting it again.

Finally, he sighed. “Look, I…”

You stiffened but didn’t turn around. “What?”

“I, uh…” He shifted uncomfortably, gripping the towel tighter. “I just wanted to say… I shouldn’t have said some of the stuff I said. At my place. It came out wrong.”

You froze for a moment before finally turning to face him. “Came out wrong?”

“Yeah,” he said, his tone defensive already. “Like, I didn’t mean all of it. Just some of it.”

“Just some of it?” you repeated, your voice rising as anger bubbled to the surface. You put the plate down, turning fully toward him. “Do you even hear yourself, Toji? Do you even care about what you said or did? Or is this just you trying to get rid of your guilt?”

His jaw clenched. “I ain’t tryin’ to get rid of nothin’. I just—”

“You just what?” you interrupted, your voice cracking. “You think you can say sorry, and it magically undoes all the years of hurt? All the shit you put me through? You think I’m just going to forget the way you humiliated me, ignored me, and treated me like I was nothing?”

Toji’s face hardened, though his eyes betrayed a flicker of guilt. “I didn’t mean to—”

“Didn’t mean to what, Toji? Didn’t mean to make me feel like I was less than human? Because congratulations, you did that perfectly.”

His fists clenched at his sides. “I wasn’t tryna make you feel like that. I just—look, I didn’t ask for you to be in my business when we were kids, okay? You were always actin’ like you could fix me or somethin’, like I was some damn charity case. That shit got under my skin!”

Your chest tightened as tears welled up in your eyes. “You think I was treating you like a charity case?” you asked quietly. “I just wanted to be your friend, Toji. I just wanted to help.”

“Well, I didn’t need it,” he snapped, his voice harsher than intended.

You let out a shaky breath, the tears falling freely now. “You know what? You’re right. You didn’t need it. And I didn’t need to spend years of my life caring about someone who couldn’t care less about me.”

Toji’s mouth opened as if to say something, but no words came out. He stood there, frozen, as you wiped at your face.

“I’m sorry for being pushy and overbearing back then,” you said, your voice trembling. “I’ll keep my distance from now on. You can have your space. Just stay out of mine, and maybe we can finally move past this.”

With that, you turned back to the sink, your hands trembling as you finished washing the last dish. Toji stood there, silent and motionless, as if struggling to find something—anything—to say.

But nothing came.

You placed the clean dishes on the rack, brushed past him without looking, and walked out into the garden to join your parents. Toji stayed in the kitchen, leaning against the counter, the weight of your words settling heavily on his shoulders.

When you reached the garden, you plastered on a smile, though your cheeks were still damp. Your parents took the cue to wrap things up quickly, and soon enough, you were leaving.

Toji didn’t come out to say goodbye.


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4 months ago

Nanami SMAU - A Verdict of Us

Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us

Chapter 7 - Beyond First Impressions

Summary: Kento Nanami was perfect—disciplined, untouchable, and entirely focused on his future. Emotions didn’t fit into his plans. You were everything he avoided—bold, warm, and impossible to ignore. You told yourself he didn’t matter, but you couldn’t stop watching him.

He never looked your way. Not until the day his perfectly controlled world unraveled, and you were at the center of it.

an: i love them. SMOOCHES 💋💋💋

{chapter 6} ; {next}

taglist: @gigiiiiislife @getovibesonly @inthedarkshadows000 @burpzz @sleepykittyenergy @fuzzycollectiondeersblog @meganbaby

࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

Nanami adjusted the cuffs of his sleeves as he glanced at the clock on his desk. It was 9:15 AM, just enough time to leave and make it to the community center by 9:45. Punctuality wasn’t just a habit for him; it was an expectation. He hated being late. Still, a part of him wondered why he had agreed to this at all. Volunteer work was not something he typically did, but when you had asked—so insistent, so sure he’d secretly enjoy it—he found himself unable to say no.

He made his way to the hallway, pulling on his shoes with practiced efficiency. The soft hum of conversation from the kitchen grew louder as his parents noticed him preparing to leave.

“Nanami,” his father’s voice came first, sharp and questioning. “Where are you going?”

“To a food drive,” he replied evenly, not looking up as he tied his laces.

“A food drive?” His mother appeared in the doorway, her arms crossed as she surveyed him. “Why? You’re a law student, not a volunteer coordinator. What purpose does this serve?”

Nanami rose to his full height, meeting her gaze with calm detachment. “Not everything has to serve a purpose.”

His father let out a disapproving scoff. “Time is a resource, Nanami. You’ve always been disciplined about how you use it. Why waste it on something like this?”

“Time spent helping others isn’t wasted,” he replied curtly. His parents were intelligent people, but their view of the world often felt limited, measured in tangible gains rather than intangible impacts.

His mother’s expression softened slightly, though the tension in her tone remained. “It’s just… unexpected. You’ve always been focused on your goals. This seems unnecessary.”

Nanami met her words with silence. There was no point in arguing further. Grabbing his bag, he moved toward the door. “I’ll see you later.”

He left before either of them could respond, his steps steady and purposeful as he made his way to the community center.

The moment he stepped inside, the atmosphere shifted. It was a flurry of motion—tables lined with donations, volunteers chatting as they sorted and packed food into neat bags. The noise was different from the usual silence of his library job or the precise discourse of a lecture hall.

And then he saw you. You stood near one of the tables, your face lit with excitement as you waved to him. The smile you wore was bright enough to compete with the sunlight streaming in through the windows.

“You made it!” you said as you walked over, your voice bubbling with enthusiasm. “And on time, too. I’m impressed.”

“I said I’d come,” he replied, his tone steady, though he couldn’t quite ignore the slight warmth in your expression.

“Fair enough,” you said, hands on your hips as you gestured toward the tables. “Come on, we’ve got work to do. Ready to roll up your sleeves?”

He followed you without comment, and soon the two of you were stationed at a table sorting canned goods. It was simple, methodical work—exactly the kind of thing Nanami excelled at. His movements were efficient, his rows of cans stacked neatly.

“You’re pretty fast at this,” you said after a while, glancing at his organized piles compared to your slightly messier one.

“It’s straightforward work,” he replied, his tone dry as he eyed your less-than-perfect stacks. “Unlike yours.”

You gasped in mock offense, placing a hand over your heart. “Are you criticizing my organizational skills?”

“I’m observing,” he said, his smirk barely visible but unmistakably there.

“Careful, Nanami,” you teased, narrowing your eyes playfully. “That almost sounded like a joke.”

“Almost,” he admitted, his voice calm but lighter than usual.

As the minutes turned into hours, Nanami found himself surprisingly at ease. The work, though repetitive, was oddly satisfying. And then there was you—chatty and energetic, your humor keeping the atmosphere light. It wasn’t something he was used to, but he didn’t mind it.

A child approached then, holding a box of cereal. The boy looked up at Nanami with wide, curious eyes, then glanced between the two of you.

“Are you two dating?” the boy asked innocently, his voice cutting through the hum of activity around you.

Nanami froze, his composure momentarily slipping as the question hung in the air.

You, on the other hand, burst out laughing, quickly covering your mouth as you tried to stifle the sound. “No, no, we’re not. But that’s a very sweet question,” you said, your tone warm as you crouched down to meet the boy’s gaze.

The boy shrugged, apparently satisfied, and wandered off, leaving Nanami still standing stiffly.

You straightened up, turning to him with a grin. “Relax,” you said, nudging his arm lightly. “He’s just a kid. You look like you’ve been accused of a crime.”

He exhaled slowly, the tension easing from his shoulders. “He caught me off guard, that’s all.”

“Noted,” you replied, your grin softening into something gentler.

By the time the food drive ended, the sun was low in the sky, casting a warm glow over the street outside. You wiped your hands on a towel and turned to him with a satisfied smile.

“It’s getting late,” he said, his voice steady but quieter than usual. “I’ll walk you home.”

You blinked in surprise, then smiled. “Really? Thanks, Nanami.”

The two of you walked in comfortable silence for a while, the quiet of the evening settling around you. As you passed a small ice cream stand, you stopped abruptly.

“Wait. We need ice cream.”

“Do we?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes,” you said, already stepping toward the stand. You didn’t wait for his answer, quickly ordering two cones. Handing one to him, you grinned. “My treat. Consider it a thank-you for volunteering.”

He took the cone with a small nod. “It’s good,” he said after a bite.

“Of course it is,” you said confidently, as though there was never any doubt.

As you walked, you began to talk about your volunteer work in other countries—building schools in rural villages, helping at medical camps, organizing clean water initiatives. Your voice grew animated as you described the people you’d met, the lessons you’d learned, and the challenges you’d faced.

Nanami listened intently, his ice cream forgotten as he took in your words. He’d always assumed you were a privileged socialite, someone who flitted from one frivolous event to another. But now, he saw a depth to you he hadn’t expected.

“You’ve done a lot,” he said finally, his tone thoughtful.

You shrugged, glancing at him. “It’s important to me. I’m lucky to have the resources, so why not use them to help others?”

He nodded slowly, his respect for you growing in a way he hadn’t anticipated.

When you finally reached your building, you hesitated for a moment before turning to him. “There’s a charity event next week. My parents are hosting, but it’s for a good cause. You should come.”

“Another one?” he asked, his tone wry but not dismissive.

“Yes. Consider it practice for networking,” you said with a teasing smile.

He thought for a moment, then gave a small nod. “I’ll be there.”

Your smile widened, radiant in the soft light of the evening. “Great. See you then, Nanami.”

He watched as you disappeared inside, then turned and began the walk home, the faint taste of ice cream still lingering on his tongue and your laughter echoing faintly in his mind.


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3 months ago

Gojo SMAU - The Art of Falling Fake

Gojo SMAU - The Art Of Falling Fake

Masterlist!

Summary: The campus buzzes with life, but you feel like a shadow slipping through the cracks—unnoticed, unimportant. At home, it’s no better. Your parents dote on your step-sister, the star tennis player, while you’re the afterthought they barely acknowledge. She’s here too, her perfect reputation casting an even bigger shadow over your existence. College was supposed to be your escape, but living at home and walking the same halls as her makes it impossible. Then he shows up—Satoru Gojo, the rich, arrogant engineering major everyone seems to worship. His smug grin and effortless charm are the kind of things you can’t stand, but when a ridiculous twist of fate forces your lives together, you find yourself fake dating the most insufferable man you’ve ever met. It’s just a deal, temporary and harmless—or so you try to convince yourself.

Taglist OPEN!

taglist: @hanakotateyama @sleepykittyenergy @inthedarkshadows000 @codeseven @byakuya61085 @minzxec @ivydoesit23 @naughteehee @not-aya @bochichi @emlient @gojoprincesss @havingnonamesucks @n1vi @linny-bloggs

Introduction

Chapter 1 - Invisible in the Spotlight

Chapter 2 - The Art of Taking an L

Chapter 3 - Fake It Till You Make It

Chapter 4 - False Advertising

Chapter 5 - Tricks, Treats and Terrible Ideas

Chapter 6 - Terms and Conditons (Mostly Ignored)

Chapter 7 - The Art of Faking it Too Well


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3 months ago

Toji SMAU - When love was always there

Toji SMAU - When Love Was Always There

Chapter 16 - Ex’s And Oh’s

Summary: You see him again on your first day of college. Fuck. Toji Zenin has been the bane of your existence since your first day of kindergarten. Over the 15 years you’ve had the “pleasure” of knowing him, he’s made it his personal mission to make your life a living hell. From chopping off your hair in kindergarten to pushing you into a pond on your first day of high school, Toji has done it all. You’d always thought he would choose a college far away from you, but as it has always been, fate came to kick your ass. Hard.

warnings: cursing, sexual language, mentions of bullying

an: What should her name be? Does she even need a name? Tell me your thoughts and ideas please! SMOOCHES 💋💋💋

{chapter 15} ; {next}

taglist: @jinxiewritings @actuallyvalerie @clp-84 @stickystay

࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

Toji SMAU - When Love Was Always There
Toji SMAU - When Love Was Always There
Toji SMAU - When Love Was Always There
Toji SMAU - When Love Was Always There
Toji SMAU - When Love Was Always There
Toji SMAU - When Love Was Always There
Toji SMAU - When Love Was Always There
Toji SMAU - When Love Was Always There
Toji SMAU - When Love Was Always There

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5 months ago

Nanami SMAU - A Verdict of Us

Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us

Chapter 2 - Thirty Minutes

Summary: Kento Nanami was perfect—disciplined, untouchable, and entirely focused on his future. Emotions didn’t fit into his plans. You were everything he avoided—bold, warm, and impossible to ignore. You told yourself he didn’t matter, but you couldn’t stop watching him.

He never looked your way. Not until the day his perfectly controlled world unraveled, and you were at the center of it.

{chapter 1} ; {next}

taglist: @gigiiiiislife @getovibesonly @inthedarkshadows000 @burpzz @sleepykittyenergy @fuzzycollectiondeersblog @nanamineedstherapy

an: she just like me fr. the blank image symbolizes a day in which she hasn’t texted him!

Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us
Nanami SMAU - A Verdict Of Us

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2 months ago

Toji SMAU - When love was always there

Toji SMAU - When Love Was Always There

Chapter 19 - Heat of the Moment

Summary: You see him again on your first day of college. Fuck. Toji Zenin has been the bane of your existence since your first day of kindergarten. Over the 15 years you’ve had the “pleasure” of knowing him, he’s made it his personal mission to make your life a living hell. From chopping off your hair in kindergarten to pushing you into a pond on your first day of high school, Toji has done it all. You’d always thought he would choose a college far away from you, but as it has always been, fate came to kick your ass. Hard.

warnings: cursing, sexual language, mentions of bullying

an: Do you guys want full on smut or should I just keep it like this??? SMOOCHES 💋💋💋

{chapter 18} ; {next}

taglist: @jinxiewritings @actuallyvalerie @clp-84 @stickystay @reneinii

࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

The party was in full swing by the time you arrived with your friends, the bass from the music vibrating through the floor as costumed students filled every corner of Gojo’s massive penthouse. Halloween decorations covered the place, from fake cobwebs to eerie glowing lights, and the air smelled of alcohol, perfume, and the faintest hint of weed. You adjusted the ears on your head, smoothing down the tight and form fitting top of your Lola Bunny costume as you scanned the crowd.

It didn’t take long to spot him.

Toji stood near the drinks table, pouring himself a whiskey into a red Solo cup, the black and white Ghostface mask lazily pushed up onto his head. His bare chest was fully on display—his excuse for a “costume” being nothing more than black sweatpants and the mask. The defined muscles of his torso flexed as he moved, tattoos standing out against his tan skin, and you could already see girls eyeing him from across the room.

A smirk pulled at your lips as an idea formed in your head.

You weaved through the crowd and crept up behind him, waiting for the perfect moment before leaning in close. “Boo.”

Toji tensed, his hand twitching around his cup as he turned sharply, his usual scowl in place—until his eyes landed on you.

His expression froze, mouth slightly parted as he took in your costume. His green eyes darkened, gaze trailing over your body, from the fluffy ears on your head to the dangerously short shorts that barely covered anything. His tongue swiped over his lips as he blatantly checked you out, and for a second, you swore he forgot how to speak.

Then, just as quickly, his expression twisted into something irritated. “The fuck are you wearin’?”

You blinked, taken aback. “A costume?”

He scoffed, his eyes flickering to the guys around you, lingering on the ones that had been stealing glances your way. His jaw tensed, and before you knew it, he was yanking his hoodie from where it was tied around his waist and tossing it at you. “Put that shit on.”

You caught it, brows furrowing. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me.” He crossed his arms over his chest, biceps flexing. “Walkin’ around damn near naked—everyone’s starin’.”

“Oh, so what, you’re allowed to be shirtless, but I have to cover up?” You put a hand on your hip. “That’s rich.”

“That’s different.”

“How?”

He scowled. “It just is.”

You grinned. “You’re jealous.”

“Jealous?” He let out a dry laugh. “Of what?”

“Of all the guys looking at me right now,” you teased, stepping closer. “Bet you wanna fight every single one of them, huh?”

Toji’s eye twitched. “I swear to god, Y/N—”

“Relax, big guy.” You threw his hoodie back at him with a wink.

Toji opened his mouth to retort, but before he could, a familiar figure brushed past the two of you.

Gojo.

You both immediately turned your attention to him, watching as he strolled by, one arm lazily slung over the shoulders of a girl. She was dressed in a police officer costume, tight-fitting but understated, a stark contrast to Gojo’s usual flashy preferences. His criminal costume complemented hers, a lazy attempt at “matching,” but what caught your attention was the way she clung to him—not in an attention-seeking way, but in a way that made it clear she was anxious and had her guard up.

Toji let out a low whistle. “So he really got a girl, huh?”

You crossed your arms. “Guess so.”

“She don’t look like his type.”

“She’s not.”

Toji glanced at you. “You met her?”

“Yeah, yesterday.” You sighed, shifting on your feet. “I might’ve been kinda mean to her.”

At that, Toji’s expression shifted. His brows furrowed slightly, lips pulling into a pout that he’d never admit was a pout. “Why?”

You shrugged. “I dunno. I guess…I was just surprised. I thought he’d go for someone different.”

“You mean someone like you?”

Your eyes flickered to his, and you could see the irritation swimming beneath them. He didn’t like the idea that you might still care.

You smirked. “Maybe.”

Toji scoffed. “You’re full of shit.”

You only laughed before turning on your heel and disappearing back into the crowd.

As the night went on, you could feel Toji’s gaze on you, your eyes meeting across the room every so often, a silent tension building between you. The occasional glances, the way his lips quirked up whenever he saw you laughing, the way you’d purposely sway your hips just a little more when you knew he was watching—it was a game, a dangerous one, but neither of you wanted to stop playing.

By the time 2 AM rolled around, you were tipsy, the alcohol buzzing through your system as you stepped out onto the balcony to get some air. You leaned against the railing, enjoying the crisp night breeze, when a familiar voice rumbled behind you.

“Coulda sworn I told you to cover up.” His voice was rough, low, edged with something that sent a shiver down your spine.

You turned, crossing your arms as you met his gaze. “You’re still on that?”

He smirked, stepping closer, his presence impossibly heavy. “Nah. Just figured I should remind you.”

“You’re annoying.”

“You love it.”

“Do I?”

“Mhm.”

You stared at each other, the air between you charged, thick with something unspoken. The tension had been simmering all night, bubbling under the surface of every lingering glance, every brush of your fingers when you passed each other.

And now, it was spilling over.

Your heart pounded as you tilted your head, voice softer now. “What are we doing, Toji?”

He didn’t answer right away. Instead, he let his gaze drop, slowly trailing down the curve of your neck, past your collarbone, over the fitted top hugging your chest. His tongue flicked out to wet his lips before he met your eyes again, darker this time, the green nearly swallowed by black.

“You tell me,” he murmured.

Your breath caught.

Something shifted.

Before you could second-guess yourself, you closed the space between you, your hands hesitating for only a second before grasping the waistband of his sweatpants, tugging him just a little closer. His chest brushed against yours, and the heat radiating from his skin was almost overwhelming.

His fingers brushed along your waist, barely there, a teasing touch that made you tremble.

You tilted your chin up, while he lowered his head to lean in closer, lips just inches from his. “I think you wanna kiss me.”

Toji huffed a quiet laugh, but it was strained. His fingers flexed against your waist, gripping you tighter, as if to steady himself.

“Yeah?” His voice was husky, a challenge laced beneath it.

You nodded, your nose brushing against his.

“You gonna do something about it?”

Toji’s patience snapped.

His mouth crashed onto yours, rough and hungry, like he’d been waiting all night for this moment. His hands found your hips, pulling you flush against him, and the heat of his bare chest burned through the thin fabric of your top. His lips were soft but demanding, his teeth nipping at your lower lip before he soothed the bite with his tongue, tasting the faint trace of alcohol on you.

You whimpered against his mouth, fisting the fabric of his sweatpants as his hands roamed your body, fingers digging into your thighs, your waist, anywhere he could touch. He kissed you like he was starving, like he needed to memorize the shape of your lips, the way your breath hitched when he tilted your head back to deepen the kiss.

His hands moved up, fingers slipping into your hair as he tilted your face, pressing deeper, devouring you. You felt the rough scrape of his stubble against your skin, the sharp contrast between his firm grip and the lazy drag of his lips against yours. He was overwhelming, intoxicating, and you couldn’t get enough.

You tugged at his waistband, making him groan against your mouth, his hands squeezing your hips in response. He pulled away just enough to mutter, “Keep doin’ shit like that, and I ain’t stoppin’.”

Your lips were swollen, breath shaky as you stared at him, both of you panting, drunk on each other.

You licked your lips. “Maybe I don’t want you to.”

Toji grinned against your skin, his teeth grazing your jaw before he kissed you again, slower this time, savoring every second. His hands slid under your hoodie—his hoodie now draped over your shoulders—fingertips tracing the bare skin beneath it.

“Fuck,” he muttered against your mouth. “You’re dangerous.”

“You like it.”

“Damn right, I do.”

And then, with a heated pull, he had you back against him, pressing his lips to yours with a force that left you breathless.

It was the last thing you remembered clearly.

The next morning, you woke up in unfamiliar sheets.

Your heart pounded as you blinked against the morning light, the events of last night hazy in your mind. Your head was killing you, and your limbs felt heavy as you slowly turned your head—only to see a very shirtless Toji sleeping beside you.

Your stomach dropped.

Oh, shit.

Panicked, you sat up, heart racing as you looked down at yourself—no clothes. No fucking clothes.

Your hands trembled as you quickly got out of bed, scrambling for your outfit. Your thoughts were jumbled, memories a blur, and you couldn’t even piece together how you’d ended up here. The only thing you knew was that you had to get out.

Toji stirred slightly, his brows furrowing in his sleep, but he didn’t wake up.

Holding your breath, you grabbed your heels and tiptoed to the door, slipping out as quietly as you could.

You didn’t stop moving until you were outside, the morning air biting against your bare skin.

And then, finally, you let out a shaky breath.

What the hell did I do?


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4 months ago

Toji SMAU - When love was always there

Toji SMAU - When Love Was Always There

Chapter 13 - What comes after

Summary: You see him again on your first day of college. Fuck. Toji Zenin has been the bane of your existence since your first day of kindergarten. Over the 15 years you’ve had the “pleasure” of knowing him, he’s made it his personal mission to make your life a living hell. From chopping off your hair in kindergarten to pushing you into a pond on your first day of high school, Toji has done it all. You’d always thought he would choose a college far away from you, but as it has always been, fate came to kick your ass. Hard.

warnings: cursing, sexual language, mentions of bullying

an: sigh… i love him idc. SMOOCHES 💋💋💋

{chapter 12} ; {next}

taglist: @jinxiewritings @actuallyvalerie @clp-84

࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

The drive to the location Toji sent you feels longer than it should. Maybe it’s because your mind is racing, or maybe it’s the late hour amplifying the stillness of the world outside. You pull into the dimly lit park, heart pounding, and spot him immediately—slouched on a bench, an empty whiskey bottle dangling precariously from his fingers. He looks utterly defeated, the sharp edges of his usual confidence dulled by whatever demons have led him here.

You step out of the car and approach cautiously. His head tilts slightly at the sound of your footsteps, but he doesn’t fully acknowledge you. Instead, he mumbles something incoherent, his words slurred.

“Toji.” Your voice is firm, sharper than you intended. “Get up. You’re coming with me. Your parents can‘t see you like this.“

He looks up at you with bleary eyes, his face flushed from alcohol. “Y-you came,” he slurs, his words tumbling over each other. “Missed you… swear I missed you. I’m sorry, okay? For everything. Just… I’m sorry.”

You don’t reply, don’t give him the satisfaction of even a hint of forgiveness right now. Instead, you focus on getting him upright, looping one of his heavy arms over your shoulders and guiding him to the car. His steps are unsteady, his weight pressing into you as he leans more than he should.

The entire drive back, he’s rambling. “You… you don’t get it,” he slurs, his head lolling back against the seat. “You think I’m just some… some asshole, huh? You hate me. I can’t… I hate me too, okay?” His words are fragmented but raw, the emotions behind them impossible to ignore.

You grip the steering wheel tighter, keeping your focus on the road. He keeps going, his voice breaking every now and then. “I never wanted to hurt you… never wanted to… God, you probably think I’m a piece of shit.”

You don’t respond. You just drive, his drunken words filling the silence.

When you finally reach your apartment, you manage to drag him inside. He’s heavier than he looks, and he isn’t exactly helping. As soon as you guide him into your room, he collapses onto your bed, sprawling across it like he owns the place.

“Toji, get up,” you say, exasperated.

“Nah,” he mutters, burying his face into your pillow. “This is… I’m good here.”

You roll your eyes, but there’s no real malice behind it. Instead, you sigh and kneel down, tugging his shoes off one by one. When you straighten up, his eyes are on you, glassy but sincere.

“You’re… too good,” he murmurs. “Too good for me. Always have been. Don’t deserve you… don’t deserve this.”

“Toji, just sleep,” you say, voice softer than before, despite your frustration.

He doesn’t listen. “I’m sorry,” he continues, his voice breaking. “For everything I said. For… all of it. You… you didn’t deserve that. Not you.”

Your chest tightens at his words, but you don’t respond. Instead, you awkwardly climb into bed beside him, keeping as much distance as possible.

“I mean it,” he mumbles, his voice barely above a whisper now. “You’re… you’re the only good thing. Always have been. I just… I ruin everything.”

Tears sting at your eyes, but you blink them away. “We’ll talk in the morning, Toji,” you whisper, your voice trembling.

He nods faintly, and before long, his breathing evens out. You lie awake for a while, your mind racing with everything he’s said.

When you wake, the sunlight streaming through the window, you’re wrapped in his arms. His grip is loose but firm enough to hold you in place. You tilt your head slightly, studying his face in the soft morning light. There’s a scar on his lip, jagged and slightly faded. It hits you, a memory he once let slip years ago—that his older brother, Jinichi, gave him that scar during a fight. What had struck you most then was how casually he’d mentioned it, as if it were normal.

The thought churns uneasily in your stomach. His parents never punished Jinichi for it, just like they never seemed to care about all the other ways they neglected him. No wonder he resented his family, always carrying that bitterness like a second skin.

You carefully extract yourself from his hold, slipping out of bed without waking him. After a quick trip to the kitchen, you return with a glass of water, some painkillers, and a simple breakfast.

To your surprise, he’s already awake when you walk in. He sits up slowly, rubbing his eyes, and you wordlessly hand him the plate.

“Thanks,” he mutters, his voice hoarse.

The two of you eat in silence, the tension in the room palpable.

When you finally break the quiet, your voice is steady but firm. “Do you want to talk about last night?”

He glances at you, then looks away, his fingers fidgeting with the edge of the blanket. “Yeah,” he says, barely audible.

You wait, giving him the space to speak.

“I’m sorry,” he finally says, his voice low. “For… everything. I ain’t good with this… this kinda shit, but… I know I fucked up. A lot.”

“You did,” you say, your voice soft but unyielding. “And I can’t just… pretend like everything’s okay now. You’ve hurt me, Toji. A lot more than you probably realize.”

He nods, still not meeting your eyes. “I know. And I ain’t expectin’ you to just… forgive me like that. But… I’m gonna make it right. However long it takes.”

You study him for a moment before nodding. “We can try… being friends. Maybe.”

His lips twitch into something that almost resembles a smile. “Yeah. Friends.”

Neither of you mentions the way you woke up tangled in each other’s arms.

As you clear the dishes, Toji sits back, lost in thought. In his mind, he recalls waking up in the middle of the night, your face illuminated by the moonlight. He remembers thinking how beautiful you looked, how peaceful.

Your full lips had been slightly parted as you slept, and his hand had rested lightly on your hip, almost as if it belonged there. He’d never noticed the softness of your skin before, but last night it had been impossible to ignore.

It hit him then, like a punch to the gut. You were… everything. Too good, too kind, too beautiful.


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