Weirdkidshere - Weird Kid's Here

Eddie isn't sure what he's expecting when Buck meets him at the airport. Red-rimmed eyes, splotchy face, hunched shoulders probably. Not this. Distant eyes, blank face, straight-backed. He'd been braced to catch Buck as soon as he landed, had spent his whole flight locking every bit of his own grief away to be thought about at a later date, let the guilt pool in his chest instead.

I should've been there, I could've -

He'd been ready to catch Buck, but it's Eddie who falls into Buck's waiting arms. Eddie who tears up. Eddie who clutches at the back of Buck's shirt like a scared child. And it's Buck sweeping his hands up and down Eddie's back, holding him together, murmuring:

"It's okay. I've got you. It's not your fault."

Eddie doesn't cry in LAX. His grief is a private thing. Always has been. He locks it into his bedroom and lets it out behind closed doors. But Buck is the safest space he's ever had, so he lets himself break a little. Lets himself shake apart under Buck's hands until he can ground himself with a deep breath at the junction of Buck's neck and shoulder. Until he can stand on his own.

Buck looks at him, eyes searching, deepest of furrows between his brows, so devastatingly gentle. And Eddie kind of wants to fucking scream at him for being okay. He'd needed to take care of Buck. He'd needed to have something to do. But now Buck is looking at him like he can fix him, and Eddie wants him to. So badly. But Buck knows Eddie's grief is for South Bedford Street, not LAX, so all he does is lead Eddie out to the parking lot.

It's a silent drive. Buck tells him the details of the funeral. Clinical. Sparing. And Eddie watches Buck's knuckles turn white on the steering wheel. Listens to the creak of leather under an unyielding grip. And he sees it then. The countdown over Buck's head, ticking away steadily. He's grateful in a way.

They pull up to the house silently. The engine falls quiet. And they stare at the door. The door Bobby had appeared on the other side of just a few months ago for a goodbye dinner. At the house. The house Bobby made coffee in when Eddie couldn't stomach being alone. At the home. The home Bobby helped him build in every way.

Buck gets out of the car. Eddie follows. Buck unlocks the door. Eddie locks it behind them. Buck disappears into the kitchen. Eddie pauses.

Can't quite separate Bobby from kitchens in his mind. And it's not like Bobby ever cooked anything in Eddie's kitchen, but there's some stupid grief-crazed part of his brain that thinks he'll find Bobby at the stove for a last supper. A parting gift to Eddie. Because Bobby was always too good. Too generous. Too understanding. When it came to Eddie.

When he finally makes it in there, Buck is stood staring into the fridge. Vacant. Eddie joins him, presses their shoulders together as hard as he can without knocking Buck away, and looks at Buck's fingers curled loosely around two beer bottles. Eddie knows it's not the early hour staying his hand.

It feels wrong. To find comfort in alcohol at Bobby's expense.

Carefully, Eddie unpicks Buck's fingers from the bottles and watches as Buck's arm falls limp to his side with such weight it bounces off his hip. Swings once, twice, stops suddenly. Eddie grabs the water filter. Closes the fridge.

"Sit down," he whispers. Sure, steady.

Buck sits down.

Eddie grabs two glasses. Fills them with water. Leaves the filter on the side. Who cares? Who fucking cares? Takes the glasses over to the table in shaking hands. Spills only a little. Sits opposite Buck. Stares into his cup.

"I didn't say it back," Buck rasps eventually.

Eddie picks his head up with great effort. Ony manages it because he wants to see what hurt he's caused. Their missing medic. Absent in their hour of need.

"What?"

"B-he-he told me he loved me." Buck's eyes go wide. Horrified. Haunted. Hollow. "He t-told me he l-loved me, and I could-couldn't say it back be-because that would mean..." Buck chokes a sob into his hand. "I thought we'd fix it. I-I-I thought we'd find a way. We-we always do. I couldn't say it-it. I didn't want t-to let him go. And now, he's..." Buck's face crumples first. Then, the rest of his body follows, folding in on itself in the chair until he looks almost as small as Christopher had the first time he'd ever sat at this table. "He's d-gone, and he doesn't know I love him."

"He knows, Buck." Eddie's hand curls into a fist on the tabletop. Doesn't know what to do. For all he'd been ready to hold Buck together, he's not sure how. "He knows you love him, Buck. You told him every single day."

"But I never said the words!" he snaps. Pure rage. Pure guilt. He looks up at Eddie. Blue eyes wet and red and wild. The rage and the guilt seeps away, leaves only pure grief. "I never said the words."

He sobs then. Doesn't choke it down. Lets it out. Eddie reacts like it's instinct even though he's never done this before. Just somehow knows in his bones what to do when it comes to Buck.

He stands, rounds the table, slides a hand into Buck's hair, one on his shoulder, pulls Buck's face into his stomach and holds him there, holds him together. Buck's fingers tangle themselves in Eddie's belt loops. A lifeline. And Eddie holds him tight as he can.

"All the times you cooked for him. All the times he cooked for you. The two of you cooking together. You had your own language, Buck. He knows you love him."

And all Eddie hears is: you're gonna stand there with a hundred-something bodies on you and tell me I'm not fit for duty. Did Bobby know Eddie loved him too?

Squeezing his eyes shut tight, Eddie drops his cheek to the top of Buck's head. Stops holding Buck together and starts holding on. Buck's hands grasp at his hips, twist into the back of his shirt just like Eddie's had at the airport.

And all Eddie hears is: I just want to make sure you don't think you have to lose everything before you can allow yourself to feel anything.

Another excellent luke x lorelai scene I want to see with buddie is them being disgustingly in love and bickering in the kitchen and rory listening to it all on the phone and just saying "go back to your dirtiness bye" 💓 gimme all the domestic fluff! (we could start with roommate fluff actually)

Yesss

Like all their lil flirty scenes are just so good and could so work for buddie and I need every fic like it

Ooo or Luke pulling loralie aside to flirt with her while she’s joking abt how he won’t flirt with her in front of Rory and it’s making her look uncool etc like that’s soooo Eddie at work or in front of the firefam and co with buck being the loralie in this situation

(unrelated side note the funniest scenario is Eddie acting unhinged the minute they get together and going from 0 to let’s fuck at the station)

Also with Eddie in fact being in Texas I think I mentioned it before but do you remember after Luke and loralie made up and they’re going on their first date back together and she finds a Jamaican music cd and she’s like it’s so weird to think there was this whole period we were apart yada yada then she jokes “clearly you were lost without me…right?” In this like reassurance seeking way and Luke immediately clocks it and reassures her? THIS TYPE OF SCENE?? Scrumptious like idc if technically these guys haven’t been without eachother in any way but physical proximity theyre THAT dramatic

finally got a hozier needle drop BUT AT WHAT COST

Update: the site I've been watching the new releases on got taken down🥲 and the newest episode isn't up on any others I've checked D:

Does anyone have a good free website that maybe has the latest episode already?? I'm so mad I couldn't watch it in my free period like I usually do😢

Boutta watch the new episode guys wish me luck!!

DID TK JUST GET SHOT????

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. ARE YOU KIDDING ME. DOES THE WHOLE SHOW JUST HAVE THE SAME STOYLINES WITH DIFFERENT CHARACTERS cuz honestly I wouldn’t even be mad.

WDYM HE GOT SHOT IN THE SHOULDER ON A CALL COME ONNNNNNNNNN

I think the funniest part of this was realising this happened first in canon, way before Eddie‘s shooting. Like what do you MEAN LMFAO.

Don't know why people say Daredevil: Born Again doesn't feel like the original when it's continuing the trend of doing everything it can to keep Matt from wearing the goddamn Daredevil outfit for longer than 5 minutes.

right so my friend just finished the 9-1-1 episode and she insisted that no one is actually dead because 'it's easter weekend' and that 'he's coming back', i then kindly pointed out how the actor wrote a goodbye letter and she argued that Jesus hosted the last supper 😭

bobby’s boybestie and co-dad michael won’t even be at the funeral. btw. which is not only sickening for the sanctity of male friendship which everyone seems to worry about but is so mean to athena bc michael would never leave her and the kids alone at a time like this. tv sucks.

God i heard about that. I have not yet had the pleasure of watching that episode but I already know it’s gonna hurt my ace little soul…😬

I always forget about the House asexuality episode... they went through the intersex episode, realized how bad they fucked the intersex episode, went back and did another intersex episode, and then decided House needed to disprove asexuality. In 2012.

The woman wasnt even House's patient!