"I Love You" ❌❌❌

I want some chaos, SO hear me out----

I want Akutagawa and Lucy to kiss for some reason (accidentally or intentionally) so that Atsushi will have the "My girl crush and guy crush are kissing each other and it's both terrible and hot at the same time"

Do people really think that skk hate eachother?

After the fight with Lovecraft, we have a scene where Dazai smiles at Chuuya; this is one of the only genuine smiles we ever get from Dazai. Most of the time he is playing up a facade and he is very hard to read but he always seems to smile more genuinely when he is around Chuuya, especially when Chuuya isn't looking at him.

What I think those two have are very complicated feelings that haven't changed since they were 15-18.

Skk never got to be friends, they were always partners, "Double Black", Port Mafia's prodigies. They didn't get the chance to just be kids and see the better sides of eachother, their relationship didn't grow organically over the years but became stunted at a time when both of them were only teenagers. Thrust in an environment where there's not much positivity, Skk were always at odds because of their clashing personalities and mutual dislike (and their similarities)

I don't think that dislike ever became hate. I think they did become closer as the years passed, but then of course Dazai left.

While saying Chuuya was sad when Dazai left is a way to show their care for eachother. I would say, Chuuya was REALLY angry when Dazai left (that's why he drank that expensive wine, it was out of spite). How can he leave? Does he have no loyalty to the PM? Does he have no loyalty to Chuuya? They were partners, he can't just leave without a word.

Dazai left without a word because he knew how mad Chuuya would be at him when he finds out, he knew if he thought about Chuuya there would be a part of him that wouldn't want to leave this partnership that they have had since three years. It was something that gave him excitement in this "worthless thing they call living" it was his will to live. He also didn't want the PM to think Chuuya was involved with him and helped him in leaving.

I do think Dazai leaving PM made Chuuya dislike him even more. Dazai was not only annoying, he was also disloyal.

But when it comes to Dazai, I don't think he hated Chuuya at all. His fondness for Chuuya is what makes him not want to like him. It's the same way Nikolai wants to kill Fyodor for being the only one who understands him. Dazai doesn't want to kill Chuuya, when he says "I have been thinking about ways to kill Chuuya since 7 years" it's a lie, a joke for him, a facade. He could have done that any time in 7 years but he chose not to. He knows when it comes to it, he can't kill Chuuya.

Chuuya would say he hates Dazai but goes out of his way to save him everytime. In Dead Apple, he risked his own life to save Dazai who could have been dead for all he knew. But he still took the chance, believing that Dazai would have a plan and that he would know that Chuuya is going to risk it. (Also I wholeheartedly believe Dazai has some fantasies about being rescued by Chuuya, that Mf totally does)

Their trust in eachother is so strong, that even when they are on the enemy side, they are able to work together, putting their differences apart. They have never had a "real" fight like Atsushi and Akutagawa, it's more of snide remarks and calling nicknames, like their teenage selves.

I don't think Chuuya is aware of these complicated feelings, he has manifested his dislike of Dazai's antics and personality to a point he had hidden his care for him. On the other hand, Dazai is very aware of these feelings, he knows he cares. So he fakes it, acting out as usual the idea that he hates Chuuya, because he knows loving and caring for someone does not end well for him (look at Oda). He doesn't want to lose another person he cares for.

In retrospect as memeable and funny those two "confession" scenes are in S5; it's the first time Dazai is not lying, he is acknowledging his care for Chuuya in a way it feels authentic and real to Fyodor, so they could trick him. It's their plan, yes, but the reason it feels real is because IT IS. No wonder Chuuya shot him so many times ("Dazai's being stupid again, making me feel things, embarrassing me in front of the enemy").

This isn't a shipping post, I do ship Skk, but their bond is so deep that you can look at it in a platonic way and very little would change.

TSH but after Bunny's death, the rest of the gang start receiving mysterious messages about their secrets.

Like the twins are sleeping together, they killed the farmer, Richard isn't rich, Francis and Charles have a thing, they tried to escape jail by going to South America, Richard knew about the farmer but kept quiet, Henry and Camilla are secretly involved, Henry tried to kill Bunny with poison mushrooms, Henry and Julian's little kiss, Julian knew about the bacchanal etc.

At first they got these messages, they kept it to themselves. Finding letters and notes in their bags, pockets and books. They kept it to themselves until they went to Bunny's funeral.

And there one of Bunny's nephews runs to them and gives Henry a note addressed to them in a familiar handwriting.

"Did you think you got me buried under the snow? That you got rid of me? I am not gone bitches, I am still here, and I know everything.

- Kisses, B"

Did I know Nikolai held Fyodor's ripped off arm to his face? Yes. Did I still cry? YES

WTF ASAGIRI WHO HURT YOU?

Forget Fyodor, I want Asagiri's villain origin story to see what made him write trauma like this

I bet he was giggling and kicking his feet when he decided to do this

He knows where it hurts us and he is not afraid to stab us and twist the knife 🙂🙃

"Human nature is hard to understand. Humans themselves don't understand their true natures. It's the people who do, are the one's to fear. I know I have a dark side, I indulge in it beacuse it's who I am. Tell me, why do you have to be good in a world with such bad people?

Everyone underestimates me as some pushover who does whatever anyone tells her to do. They talk freely around me, because I am not a threat. They laugh at my awkwardness. They think they have power over me.

I have calculated my interactions to an extent that I have no enemies and been so cautious about whom I talk with, I have no friends. But that doesn't matter, I know what I want, I get what I want, life while cruel has always worked out for me in the end. I have fears, yes, but I also know that I have the potential to do immense good or bad. It's your choice, if you are not in my way, you will be alright. If you challenge me, it won't end good for you."

~Emma Wright, A Girl In The Crowd (my debut novel, hasn't been published yet)

GUYS.... He's in denial Guys 😭😭😭😭😭🤣🤣🤣🤣

BSD S5 is driving me insane~

I did not expect to cry because of Fyolai and FukuFuku

Why do they have to pair them up and then separate them?

Are we here to fulfil Asagiri's sadistic desires ? 😭

Does he even like us?

"This story is not for people who are good at living"

Bullshit

Then maybe you should think about your fanbase of mentally ill people on copium~

Just sayin'

(ps: at least Skk and sskk reunion happened)

*1:00 Am, Lupin Bar, Dark Era*

Dazai: are blind dates made for blind people?~

Oda:.......*stare*

Ango: of course not, Dazai. You know that already! It's for people who meet up without seeing or knowing each other

Dazai: is a group date considered an orgy?~

Oda:........*stare*

Ango: WTF. No. Why are you asking that? How much have you drunk?

Dazai: what about host clubs, are they a front for prosti---

Ango:-----not another word. What is wrong with you kid?

Oda:.........*stare*

Dazai: I thought I could ask you for romantic advice and some knowledge on the adult world~

Ango: these are not questions about romantic advice. Why are you asking us about it? And Oda are you gonna say anything or are you too drunk to?

Oda, dozing off:........

Dazai: I asked you two because you two are dating, right! Who else would I ask, except a couple in love~

Ango: WE ARE NOT DATING

Oda, opening his eyes:.........*stare*

Ango, massaging his temples: Oda don't stare at me like that and Dazai for the love of God stop laughing!!!!!

Dinner table conversation in my family:

Mom (ISFJ): I tried really hard to make all of your favourite dishes!

Grandma (ESFJ): That is so sweet dear!

Dad (ESTJ): You know I told you I want to try and eat healthy boiled vegetables and you STILL made my favourite food?

Me (INTP): *I did not want to sit with them and make them see my wierd eating habits* I don't like any of these food.

Mom (ISFJ): Too bad you have to eat it....NOW

Grandma (ESFJ): Let's pray to god before eating and thank them for the food.

Me (INTP): Why do we have to pray to god when they don't exist and did nothing for us?

Mom (ISFJ): just do what you are told

Me, turns to dad (INTP): didn't you tell me to have my own opinions and ideas about the world?

Dad (ESTJ): I am not saying you are wrong but.....if you want to have food you have to go by the rules. Just pray.

Me (INTP): I am not praying to anyone. I don't care if you take my food away! I am NOT changing my beliefs!

Grandma, upset (ESFJ): why are you like this, where did we do wrong?

Mom (ISFJ): Just be thankful then, okay? I don't have patience for a debate.

Everyone: thank you god for the food we received and for everything you did for us.

Me (INTP): Thank you mom for making the food, thank you grandma for helping in preparing it and thank you dad for buying the groceries.

Me (INTP): you told me to be more thankful, I was. There's always loop holes.

Dad (ESTJ): *hides smirk*

*The squad's reaction to being told they're the chosen one*

Bunny: I will not let you down.

Richard: Sounds fun.

Camilla: K.

Francis: No, I'm fucking not.

Charles: Do I have to be?

Henry: Please god, I am so tired.