Italians Were Hella Right In Combining Pasta, Olive Oil And Garlic. I’m Convinced That They’ve Got

Good morning to everyone but Wen Chao. He can get his from the Xuanwu tortoise.

Wei WuXian:

*Looks for LAN ZHAN all the time in the first life*

*Always chasing after LWJ in the first life*

*Got branded for a dude*

*Always saving and helping LWJ in the first life*

*Seeks him out even after death and reincarnation*

*Constantly giving him ‘eye-fucking invitations’*

I mean he lusts after him worse than any straight couple flirting I’ve seen...it’s a wonder he didn’t make LWJ’s block list.

And LWJ suffers through all of this and more, ever so patient and generous.

I bet if he had a phone, LWJ would be his emergency contact which would of course make JC extra mad.

Even the gods went, you’re not a villainous soul but please go find your man, he’s pining too hard on earth.

Meanwhile, the Untamed:

Two bro’s chilling in a bath tub five feet apart because they’re what? Not Fuckin’ Gay.

Me: I don’t have any seemingly recognizable human emotions that you could pin me under. I’m impenetrable and indecipherable. The ultimate warrior archetype.

Also me: listens to 6lack at 2am imagining a bad breakup and craving a booty call to supress these sudden feelings.

Huh.

Did a little soul searching...I am in fact, a narcissistic little shit with no concern for consequences but if someone mentions a cat I will build a shelter with my bare hands and protect it from the elements.

I run on sex, sleep, chocolate and anger and if that isn’t wholesome I don’t know what is.

I hate your guts but here’s some chocolate flavored Yoplait to help you through it.

Watching those restoration videos on YouTube and commenting hoping that one of those creators will entertain the possibility of restoring the shattered pieces of my sanity back together once this year ends.

Watching the GameStop meltdown brought out the economics nerd in me that I lost in high school right around when microbiology seemed like the coolest shit around.

Watch me explain how a Reddit forum is saving the economy but also possibly shutting it down. Don’t get me wrong, the bubble will burst at some point soon, I just hope it swings the pendulum against the hedgefucks.

My favourite part about this entire thing is the public realization that Wall Street isn’t as rational or analytical as people thought, there isn’t really a lot of brainpower going into this as they want you to think. It was, is and has always been a dick-measuring contest among those who have money to throw around. If those are the rules, then let everyone play.

If they keep holding, this would be big for retail investors. But also for brokerage firms as the next wave of experimental, hungry and driven individual investors might not be so kind.

Power to the people. Make them bleed green.

Professions BL has introduced me to over the years:

Engineers

Doctors

C-Suite everything (CEO, CTO, CFO)

Gym Instructors

Vets

Cafe waiters / owners

Millionaire rich kid (daddy’s little boy gets paid a hefty sum every month to ride around in a souped up coupe)

Businessman (shady or legitimate, who cares, look he’s wearing a turtleneck)

Intelligence operatives

Bar tenders

Laundry Operators

Team manager (of what and why exactly? We don’t know, but he manages a team)

Salesperson

Hackers (ethical or redeemable)

Criminal (street and organised)

Creative Director

Painters

Pornographer

Dancer

Loan sharks (probably the only one that caught me off guard)

Lawyer

Dentists (because dentists are not doctors)

Hairdresser

Stewards/pursers

Fashion Designer

Interior designer

Model

Aircraft technicians

Tutor

Deliveryman

Makeup/Skin care promoter (for those brand placements)

Actor (theatre and film)

Artist manager/creative director

Producer

Race car driver (omegaverse included)

Shareholder (it is a career path if you’re rich enough right?)

Bodyguard

Graphic designer

Farmer

Architect

Meteorologist (and a horny one at that, who would’ve thought huh?)

Game Developer

Cultivators

Grim reapers (even a pre-ordained one counts)

Landlord

Political Activists

Athletes

Writers

Ceramic artist

Filmmakers

Videographers

Photographers

Boom operators

Singer

Editor

Manga artist

Ice skater

Producer

Ghost (I don’t know either.)

Project manager

Chef

Kpop idol

Teacher

Influencer

Gamer

Military officer

Supermarket owner

Real estate broker

Medical examiner

Gangster (a constant favorite)

Police officers

and

A two timing snitch (you read that right, there’s always one so it’s gotta be a paying gig.).

It’s a diverse bunch y’all.

If you can guess the bl from these positions, congratulations, you’ve watched all of them probably.

(I ran out of tags by the way)

Being a hypocrite is really tiring, pretending to care takes a toll on a person.