Yuunfi - Hopanless Romtic

where tf am i

Auditory Processing Problems

• *someone says something* “what?” *repeats themselves* “sorry?” *repeats themselves again* “pardon?”

•"hey, y'see the red thing at the top of the shelf, will you get it?“ “Sorry, what?” “On the sh-” “oh yeah sure, I’ll get it.”

•*doesn’t hear teacher because someone’s pen is making a scratchy sound at the back of the room*

•*replays video 10 ten times to figure out what they’re saying*

•teachers asking, “why do you always stop writing in the middle of a sentence, just write down whatever I’m saying,” followed by the response, “I’m just processing it,” rebuked by, “we’ll stop processing it and just write.”

•*gets really focused on staring out the window and goes through four songs without hearing a single on*

i hate the idea of a True Self that you Never Show To Anyone like the me by myself isn’t me partly because humans are defined imo by their social interactions as we are social creatures but mostly because that guy is a gremlin. the disgusting idiot who crawls out of my bed at 1pm and eats peanut butter from the jar isn’t me he’s the manifestation of a collection of weird impulses that all give way at once. saying that dude is Truly Me In An Objective Way, as if that exists, is such bullshit like [holds up a creature that is on the cusp of going insane because its species literally cannot be alone for any significant amount of time] behold, a True Self! give me a break

yoshida you FOOL. he thinks he can mansplain manipulate malewife denji. he doesn't know denji's antibodies from surviving makima's gatekeep gaslight girlboss attack are too powerful.

i don’t know how to say these things in a nice way because my nerves have been fried for quite some time and i’m basically running on empty right now but i wanted to write about anti-asian sentiment, and more specifically, how people can address it.

there are a lot of posts with a lot of notes going around coming from very well-meaning people about how we can combat anti-asian sentiment by fighting cultural appropriation or stopping insults about food and whatnot, and i understand the impulse, but the fact is this: anti-asian sentiment is rooted in white supremacy, in colonialism, and in imperialism, and those things cannot be stopped by simply teaching people to say our names correctly.

if you want to end anti-asian sentiment, we must end white supremacy and imperialism. if you want to end white supremacy and imperialism, you must learn about the histories of white supremacy and imperialism— not only in asia, but across the world. it is crucial that we, as asians, unite ourselves with other colonized people to fight these systems. i invite others to move past the badge of allyship and truly learn what it means to commit yourself to the fight against white supremacy and imperialism, and then do it. 

now, more specifically: when we think about the 8 people who were killed in atlanta this week, we understand that they were targeted because of their asianness, yes, even knowing that all who died were not asian— but they were targeted also because of their class, the line of work they were in, their migration status, their gender. the women who were murdered were at particular risk because they were working-class migrant women who worked in a massage parlor, and who may have been s*x w*rk*rs. this is absolutely crucial to understand! you cannot understand their deaths as being separate from war crimes committed by the united states in vietnam, or from the sex tourism industry in southeast asia.

even when we think about the spate of attacks on asians on the street, or at the train station, or on public transit, who is being targeted? the majority of these attacks are on working-class, low-income migrant elders. there are other attacks, still, that i have heard that have targeted asian women specifically. these, too, are acts of violence tied to white supremacy and imperialism. so understanding this– if a white man approaches me, or my sister, or my migrant neighbors with intent to harm us, what good does it do if he is educated about how to pronounce my name, or if he knows how to use chopsticks respectfully? 

these are just some thoughts i am having that i think are missing from the conversation, at least on this website. thank you for reading if you have gotten this far. i hope this makes sense. i truly pray for the downfall of imperialism every single day.

if you are looking for places to learn more, or to donate, please check out the following organizations. i am in new york, so some of these orgs will be local to me, but i have tried to include national orgs i know of that are doing good work. thank you.

Nodutdol – donation link for NYC-based community organization of Koreans in the US against war and militarism

Desis Rising Up and Moving (DRUM) – donation link for NYC-based org of South Asian and Indo-Caribbean working class people fighting for economic justice

BAYAN USA – USA-based alliance of grassroots organizations working towards national democracy in the Philippines. there is a donation link on their website. this is the overseas chapter– the main organization is in the Philippines. 

Red Canary Song – donation link for US-based grassroots collective of Asian migrant s/x w/rk/rs 

Butterfly – donation link for Toronto-based Asian and migrant s/x w/rk/rs network

Atlanta-area spa shootings fundraisers – GoFundMe donation links for families affected by the Mar 16 murders 

Switching between these every day

‘To those who fell martyrs for the sake of the land of sad oranges, and to those are yet to fall’

Ghassan Kanafani, Palestinian writer and member of the PFLP.

Israel assassinated him along with his niece in a car explosion in Beirut on July 8, 1972. They had to collect his body parts off trees. His wrist was found on top of a building with his hand watch still ticking.

tips for future and current psych majors from a psych major

know that psychology isn’t just having someone sit on a couch and talk about their feelings. there’s research, psychiatry (the more chemistry side of psych), music therapy, clinical psychology, counseling psychology, and so. much. more.

figure out your final goal. there are literally hundreds (ok i may be exaggerating) of different fields within psychology, so work backwards

do some research and determine a couple fields of psych that you may want to get a job in after you graduate. there’s research, therapy, clinical psychology, school psychology, etc. it doesn’t have to be one final choice, it could be more than one, but it’s good to narrow it down to a few and have an idea for your top choice.

take classes related to the fields you’ve chosen to help you get a better understanding of what your future career would be like, and from there figure out which class’ material you liked the best (material. not the best teacher). this will help you narrow down to your top choices and help you feel more confident in your goals.

know that you don’t really have to choose until maybe your 3rd or even 4th year of college. and even then, you don’t really have to choose until after you graduate and are looking for a job, but having a field in mind will help you feel more prepared for life after college

know that there is a lot of memorization. parts of the brain, different emotions, diseases, ground breaking studies; you will need to memorize all of these things. flash cards will become your best friend when memorizing this stuff.

brain diagrams are everywhere. a lot of psychology crosses over into neurology, and you’ll have to learn what specific parts of the brain are responsible for different functions. it helps to draw out these diagrams and color code them for each section of the brain. they don’t have to look pretty. an oval with a vertical line going down the middle is good enough to get the general idea of a brain.

expect big class sizes. 100 and 200 level psychology courses are common electives among non-psych majors, so know that a lot of your classes in your first year or two will most likely be lecture classes, meaning you’ll have to do the majority of the learning on your own. this is when it’s very important to hold yourself accountable for your learning and to study on a regular schedule.

take part in experiments if you can. pretty much every college has student-run research experiments that you can be a subject in (and sometimes they’ll pay you to participate). be a participant in as many as you can. not only are they fun and interesting, but they’ll give you a better understanding of what to expect in higher level courses.

know that your professors are there for you. most psych professors are the nicest people you’ll ever meet. and since they’re experts in psychology, they understand the stress you are under and they are typically more than happy to answer questions or even just be an ear to listen while you vent.

if you can, get ahead in your classes. look ahead in your text books, get notes from people who have already taken the class before, or just watch psych videos like Crash Course to familiarize yourself with stuff you’ll probably need to learn at some point. and this goes for every class/major. it’s a very easy way to not feel like you’re drowning when you have a difficult class. (i’m more than happy to share some of my psych notes with anyone! message me and i can send you some of my notes if you want!)

use yourself as a reference. a big part of psychology is personality and behavior, and you yourself are a prime example of a personality. take personality quizzes and find out more about yourself the help you learn why you are the way you are. it will give you a better understanding of how the brain works and it may help you make connections in some topics. (click here for one of my new favorite personality tests app)

if you have any questions, feel free to message me and ask! i’m an educational psycholgy (major) and special education (minor) student, and i’m going to start taking graduate level classes in a year to get a masters in educational psych, so hopefully i’ll be able to answer your questions to the best of my ability. and if not, hopefully i’ll at least be able to point you in the right direction! love you guys! - sam xx

haikyuu doodle