You Know That Younger Sibling / Older Siblings Thing Where The Older Ones Simply Refuse To Acknowledge

Dear Closeted People On Tumblr...

How do I pretend to be straight?

What do straight people talk about? How do I sit properly? How do I make it seem like I'm not distracted by a girl's beauty and I am indeed enchanted by the non-existing handsomeness of a boy? How does one breath in a gay panic?

“You can’t adopt me! I already have parents.”

“Oh, well if that was the only thing bothering you, I can fix that.”

“What?”

“Preferably, if you give me your parents’ identities, I can get rid of them right now. Otherwise, I’d have to systematically get rid of all this city’s parents with kids who are roughly your age, gender, and ethnicity. It’d take me a while, but it’ll be worth it to have you as my kid.”

the suffering never ends

Curse my friend. I asked her what she think Aeolus would sound like if they were voiced by a dude instead of a gal and she said “like Eurylochus”.

So fuck. Now I hear fucking Armando Julian when I mentally sing Keep Your Friends Close-

Papers Out!

The thriller/comedy series I'm writing featuring character stereotypes that I either change completely or improve/expand details on. It focuses on a newspaper club filled with some of the main stereotypes you see in teen movies as they get dragged into a mystery involving human experimentation and the paranormal going on within their up tight private boarding school. My main cast includes an anxious nerd with a strange obsession with perfection, his sheltered catholic best friend who also embodies the gay best friend troupe, a mute theater kid who has definitely got arrested for arson at some point, a jock who acts as the groups overprotective older brother who is a bit far too caring, and the school's popular girl who definitely does not have a strange obsession with her image and has crippling insecurities.

Prompt #24

"Sweetheart," Villain cooed with a sympathetic smile. "It's okay."

They pulled the limp hero onto their lap, brushing hair out of their eyes and scrubbing dirt off Hero's cheeks lightly with the pad of their thumb.

"It's not your fault that Organization failed to tell you you were their peace offering."

Villain's smile turned from soft sympathy to wicked amusement. "I have the funnest things planned for you."

The Narrator

Sometimes I find that the narrator for stories is just far too boring in most stories that I read. I like narrators that either have more fucking personality or just say the most random shit (for example the wonderful Lemony Snicket in Series of Unfortunate Events). Give the narrator some fucking sass. Make them swear. Make them question what the fuck they're witnessing.

Make your narrator a character. Make them make the reader question the character and story by throwing in off hand comments when telling the story. Make them insult the reader. Make them call us all the fuck out in the most insulting way possible.

The Chosen One Troupe

I'm always wondering why most writers I see always have a very similar why of going around with this troupe. Think of all the possibilities:

They could be a literal war criminal who has killed thousands of people

They could be a tired college student who doesn't want to deal with this bullshit

Could be fucking married to the bad guy they're meant to kill and just go all "nah"

A gen z who is done with life

Could just die and those prophecy reading dunderheads were looking for the wrong fucking person

All the stupid possibilities

Headcanon: Nahida does grabby-hands and silently asks for uppies during meetings or just when talking with the other important people of the akademiya.

All I can imagine is Al-Haitham or Cyno during a very important meeting pausing their sentence to pick up the dendro archon - the god of wisdom herself- and holding her on their hip before continuing their point

Edit: continuation

"Whether you like it or not, I am your parent! My suggestion is that you get used to it."