Guys Hear Me Out....

The public (I think) school system for ya. Fuck public school.

Teagan Crashes The Fuck Out

I’m so sick of all these tests and exams. Just let me go home. Stop making me do stuff, you’re making my brain hurt. Stop being so loud and obnoxious, no one thinks you’re cute. No one thinks you’re funny. No one likes your racist Asian jokes. Just let me have my… what? Summer break is a day shorter than two months?!? YOU’RE TELLING ME THAT I HAVE TO GO BACK TO THAT HELLHOLE

ON

JULY

THIRTY

FUCKING

FIRST?!?!????

NAHHHHHH FUCK YOU. TO WHOEVER MADE THAT DECISION, I HOPE EVERY TIME YOU WALK INTO A ROOM, YOU FORGET WHY YOU WENT THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE. I HOPE BOTH SIDES OF YOUR PILLOW ARE WARM. I HOPE YOU STEP BAREFOOT ON THE MYSTERY SPOT ON YOUR CARPET. I HOPE YOU BITE INTO A SOFT FOOD AND GET SOMETHING CRUNCHY. I HOPE YOU BITE INTO A HOT FOOD ANS INSTEAD OF WARMNESS, YOU GET THAT DISGUSTING HALF COLD-HALF HOT TEMPERATURE. I HOPE ALL OF YOUR SOCKS HAVE HOLES IN THEM. I HOPE WHEN YOU GET HOME, YOUR PET ISNT HAPPY TO SEE YOU. I HOPE YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW GETS CANCELLED. I HOPE YOUR MOTHER TELLS YOU SHE NEVER LOVED YOU.

WE BE NOT FRIENDS. FOR YOU ARE MY GREATEST ADVERSARY, MY MORTAL ENEMY. YOU, WHO MAKE ME STAY IN THE CHILD-FILLED, SHIT-SCENTED HELLHOLE FOR JUST SHY OF NINE MONTHS. YOU, WHO STRAIGHTEN YOUR TIE AND PRETEND YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THE SCHOOL EXPERIENCE, DESPITE THE FACT THAT THE LAST TIME YOU WERE IN SCHOOL WAS IN THE FUCKING STONE AGE.

YOU ARE MY MORTAL ENEMY, YET YOU KNOW NOT ME AS A PERSON.

BUT I KNOW YOU

I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU ARE

Everytime this gets replied JK makes a joke and no one laughs and it's super awkward

Everytime this is reblogged, JK Rowling steps on a lego

reblog to tell your mutuals they’re lovely as fuck

Reblog this post to ask mutuals to tell you their weirdest theory about u

EDIT: Fair warning this post is cursed and predictions are 7/10 times correct, play at own risk

Fanfiction is so weird I'll be reading something that'll make me feel real emotions and could rival Shakespeare. And then....

The phrase "little meow meow" will pop up and I'll throw my phone across the room.

That moment when you realize a character is to much of a gremlin to be binary

Guys I'm convinced Ariana Grande is a war criminal.

(I was right about Mr beast too)

Do you like Arcane?

Do you like fanfiction?

Do you like jayvik?

Do you like silly sellout fics?

Do you like humor?

Do you like modern AUs?

Sick! Read my fic!

Rated M for cannon typical stuff and implied things. Mind the tags :)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/63409573

I hereby give you a gold star

Guys. My dudes. Toads, friends, suckers, and foes. I may need divine intervention. I'm sick. As fuck. The hatman does NOT respect boundaries. Be warned