No One's Doing Somnophillia Anymore

"i've got you" "you're okay" "it's okay i'm here" during sex,,, aahaahaa aheheeeeheee

I hate how easy Lush cosmetics gets my ass. . Their gay ass employees touch me and I’m spending a hundo bucks

i honestly forget how dehumanizing it feels to be in predominantly white queer spaces. i see a handful of lesbians of color and its like the sun hitting me after a very cold and bleak winter.

sweet femmes. femmes like sugar that melt under your touch. femmes with flesh to grope and squish and kiss and bite. femmes that wrap themselves in lace and ribbons like pretty presents. femmes that wear pink lipstick and leave kiss marks on your face. femmes that are soft like bunnies and cuddle all the time. femmes that smell like vanilla and marshmallows and sweet dreams. femmes who need hands on them at all times to feel good. femmes who whisper in your ear during functions and drag you home. femmes who wear lacy bras and tiny skirts and like parading in front of you. femmes who like being carried around, hands wrapped around your biceps. cute femmes. sweet femmes. just femmes.

do you guys actually fuck with needy femmes? femmes that wake up from a nightmare at 3am and scramble for their phone because they immediately need to call and hear your voice? femmes that text 'i miss you' and 'where'd you go :(' when you leave the chat for two minutes? femmes that reply as soon as they see your notification? femmes that send 17 messages in a row? femmes that can't cum without you talking them through it? femmes that need to always be touching you? that get sad when you have to leave the house without them? that need extra comfort from you when they're sad or crying? that wonder if you're mad at them if you forget to put your hand on their thigh in the car or open the door for them? that can't cum if they're worried you're bored, so you always have to come up for air from between their thighs to tell them 'take your time' and 'i promise i'm enjoying this'? that tell you they miss you every second you're not there? that wonder what you'd think of something at any given point? that feel disappointed when you don't send them a photo of yourself that day? that can't take a shower without you sitting outside the curtain? that can't go to the kitchen for food unless you're following? femmes that can't sleep without you? that pretend like you're there watching over them and holding them every time they fall asleep alone? that constantly ask what you're up to? that cant do anything without thinking of you? that whine when you drop their hand for a second to do something? that always need to share your food? femmes who, the moment you entered their life, became obsessed? do you fuck with needy, clingy, overbearing, obsessive, high maintenance femmes? do you really rea-

Miss Rarity’s prepared for Lunar New Year. 🐲

i’m so attention deprived i might pass away

i don’t think i’ve ever seen anyone as in the dog house as haruka when michiru caught her flirting with the maid

Albert Camus, from a letter to María Casares featured in Correspondance, 1944-1959 (my translation)

Things that leveled me up as a Dyke Pt. 2

When I had dyke sex in the parking lot of the fire and brimstone church I grew up in

When a girl drew protective sigils on my arm for weeks after she overheard me tearing apart her old roommate for saying transphobic shit about her

When the sleep study doctor told me I have a medically large tongue and my wife shouted "I KNEW IT"

When the butch at the hardware store told me the shelf cutting machine broke and we spent 20min cutting shelves with bolt cutters for my wife's closet.

At the RenFaire, my wife tried the knife throwing but couldn't get it, then got huffy when I told her how to do it. She handed me the last knife and told me it's not that easy. I did not tell her I threw knives a lot as a kid, so with all her bags and jewelry balanced in one arm, I flipped the knife a couple times and sunk it into the wooden target guy. Felt like a damn hallmark movie and I loved it.

When an Aussie woman in a hotel lobby asked me to please please keep talking because she was fascinated by my american southern accent. I called her darlin and she blushed.

When my wife's grandfather was fine with her being a lesbian largely because I was such a big help with the cattle

When I moved an iron bedframe into the garden for my wife's coworker and she asked how long we'd been together. The answer was that morning. We'd been going steady for about an hour.

When I taught my wife how to waltz