Genuinely Want A Skateboard And Learn How To To Do But Like, I'm Too Fat And Out Of Shape For That.

slight regret for how deep I cut on my wrist is now setting in

want to commit but I got a thing going on tomorrow, so suicide debate is postponed. (I'm upset for no reason and hating on everyone)

"ill need your essay by 3:15 or you'll have to spend time after"

fuck off fuck off fuck off I leave at 130 you cant make me stay. you can wait until fucking midnight when I turn it in. you can fucking wait.

i have always been fat. even as a kid. I've never known to see myself skinny or bones at all. i literally cannot imagine how I'd look skinny. and I fucking hate it. the issues should have been worse when I was younger, maybe that would've fucked my brain more and I could have done something right with my life.

I swear so much has happened these last 3 days that nothing feels real, and it's not even bad stuff, just very eventful days and it's leaving me very floaty and confused

it feels like I haven't stopped to take a break or take in anything fully

vaguely religious thoughts are back, drop all friends when school is done, break up with partners, (try to) get a job, kill self before 2026.

when you are very bad for years, people no longer worry.

you become invisible, a ghost.

I can leave now, everyone has forgotten me.