TO MY FELLOW 🇺🇲💥AMERICAN🦅⛽ TUMBLRINAS

eating a salad (anxiously)

I've waited many long, dark years (like 2 months) for my beloved wife (gabriel plushie) to return from the war (come in the mail). My hope is faltering. Come home to me, darling. 😔

I took a hiatus from this hellsite for like a week to binge play ultrakill and completely missed the Ides of March I'm a fucking disgrace.

I just played a game of cat and mouse with my brother except I was the cat and also the mouse.

He thought we were playing keep-away with a mysterious cube but little did he know he was tricked. Fucking hoodwinked. Absolutely bamboozled.

While the fool scrambled to keep it away from me, I cleverly slunk away to my room to eat cheese in peace like a wretched little rodent.

Poor boy didn't even realize.

I feel like you have Maybe reblogged this before but like

You core?

sounds like something my cousin jongle would do

I can blow you up with my death ray but only if you beg me

Why is April fools shaping up to be particularly nonchalant this year??? I was ready for chaos and now I get nothing???

get off my property

i hate this stupid fucking koala so much i hate him it makes me physically ill looking at his stupid face i wish jimmy actually threw him off the fucking building bc he sucks so fucking much i hate him i hate him i hate him i ha

Read it and weep, fuckers.

My fears exactly. And now that the results are in, I am terrified.

He has the presidency AND the Senate, and (as far as I've heard) he can appoint 3 more Supreme Court judges. Which means he has the Executive, Legislative, and Judicial branches. Basically the entire fucking government!!

I don't want to get political on my shitpost blog but you summed up my fears so accurately.

Why do I have a horrible sinking feeling that trump will win. I’m so scared guys. I don’t know what’s gonna happen I don’t have any control over what will happen except my one tiny say and the next four years are so critical for the planet and what if he is elected do I have to lose the forests and glaciers and nature as I know it what about living my life I’m a woman and he doesn’t want me to have rights and I don’t know if I’ll ever be in a high enough income bracket to escape his economic plans guys I’m so scared I was on the phone with my mom last night and we both started to cry because he already has the courts and he’s so close to having the senate if he gets the presidency then is it over or will it just become the horrible time before over where everything goes downhill but we don’t hit the bottom yet and somehow rock bottom gets lower and lower every day and I will try to bear it but fuck I don’t know if I can

it's cool how you can taste your bones