Never. It’s Very Homely In Here. 🇺🇸

“SIX fag sex? In this economy?”

It’s a sarcastic song, Richie. For comic relief. Also, the Beatles are British, so I’d doubt that they’d be Commies. God Bless Sarcasm. 🇺🇸

Another masterpiece from Elvis, but I think this may be some ADA trickery. If not, 10/10, an amazing song, if yes…. don’t come back here ever again. God Bless America. 🇺🇸

Join Us, Tumblr User @sixty-silver-wishes. Become part of the Presleyverse.

okay does mainstream tumblr know about the elvisverse. it’s all over my dash and it’s expanding every day. I have no idea how many elvises there are at this point. woah mama I’m going insane

theyre unlocking new types of guy over on reddit apparently

okay, mod post, I need to vent abt smth

it is ridiculous how much cleaning your room and cooking a nice meal for yourself can fix your mood

I no longer wish to get isekaied to some other dimension

this is great

You can do it! (The non-fascist part of) America believes in you!🇺🇸

I really wanna tell my mom I’m trans

Correct. God Bless Tumblr. 🇺🇸

how does tumblr even work do you just like talk to yourself until people are like "i like this one"

He’s not messing with you, Richie. Hope you come to your senses soon.🇺🇸

The Time Travel Approval Council reviews proposals for use of the organization’s time machine. For a proposal to be accepted it must either A) work towards or at least not he counter to one of the Council’s primary goals or B) otherwise improve the quality of life on Earth.

FAQ:

Q: Who are the members of the Council?

A: That’s classified.

Q: What are the primary goals of the Council?

A: 1) Ensure the time machine is/was developed. 2) Repair the friendship between @elvis-official and @nixon-official. The exact details are classified but the results of their rift will inevitably lead to catastrophe in the future. 4) Maintain the existence of the hellsite known as “Tumblr”. 5) Make sure some funny things happen throughout the timeline. As a treat.

Q: What about time travel paradoxes?

A: We solved all of those. Don’t worry about it.

Question…

‎

God Bless Freshwater Freaking It 🇺🇸

splatoon fans are like “you GOTTA listen to ‘freshwater freekin it’ that one is straight fire” and link you to a song composed of synthesized cat meows, first graders playing recorders, and vine booms. and then by the end you’re absolutely furious because they’re right