Sparky With Melons

You know what’s incredibly irritating? When you’re unconsciously stimming, eg tapping your leg, playing with your jewelry etc in a very special way, then suddenly stop, then realizing something is missing, wanting to return to wiggling your leg but not knowing how exactly you moved it because you did it unconsciously so it just feels wrong no matter what you try you just don’t get that satisfying feeling of That Special Move™️ back so it feels like something important is missing or is it just me

Meet You Again - Silvaze Fanfic

I love this ship so much lmao. Please enjoy, I worked very hard on this! :)

Silver yawned deeply, stretching tiredly in his little recliner as he endlessly flipped through the channels on TV, nothing appearing to be interesting. His eyes drooped depressingly, and had dark bags underneath. His amber oculars were so lifeless and dull, all the energy lost from him.

Silver had always felt empty.. For so long he felt like something was missing. Like there was something erased from his life. It was like a literal hole in his mind and heart. Nothing he ever did replaced it. He was used to it by now. He could barely remember a time when he actually felt something. Whether it be good or bad. He couldn't cry. He couldn't laugh or smile. He couldn't feel anything. He felt numb. Of course, he constantly felt physical pain. His head would burst into fits of intense throbbing pain, reminding him of the missing pieces within his memories. Shattered and scattered, and he was unable to piece them together.

He still had friends, somehow. Sonic and Amy would sometimes come over, bring baked goods, make sure he was taking care of himself. He hung out with them at times, just simple lunch dates and whatever. But he could never really get into the fun. All he could do was watch as if from a distance, wishing he could enjoy something.

Shadow would come around sometimes too. It was weird to see Shadow act concerned, especially for Silver. He guessed most of his friends would only come by to make sure he was still living. But Silver couldn't really say he was living. This didn't really feel like living. Just barely holding on to the fragile string that is life.

He constantly pondered what was his purpose. Why had he been put on this world, just to feel lost? What could fill this void within him? Whenever Silver scanned through the shards of his mind, he found no continuity. No pattern. No correlation. Nothing made sense. He could catch glimpses of something, someone. They were a breathtaking lilac, but that was all he could see before it would disappear into the depths of his mind. It was the closest he came to feeling something.

*Knock knock*

Silver winced at the sudden loud noise intruding the ambience. It was one of those days where he had a terrible aching headache. He rubbed his head, and levitated out of his seat to the front door.

He took a quick peek into the peephole, to spot a blue blob standing outside his door. Must be Sonic, Silver thought. He opened up the door, putting on his best smile he could. After years of feeling empty, he had practically perfected his smiles.

"Hey, Silver!" Sonic said enthusiastically. "Amy and I have set up a picnic for today, and we're inviting some people over! I think it'd be great for you to get out, especially since I think there's someone you should meet," he winked suggestively, bumping Silver with his elbow playfully. Silver involuntarily rolled his eyes. But something inside him seemed to be urging him on.

"When and where is it?" Silver asked, the monotone voice he had lifting slightly. The slightest bit of emotion had managed to slip into him. This tiny bit of feelings managed to overwhelm him. He couldn't understand what the feeling was, but it was somewhat pleasant. It felt like a voice was calling distantly from the void in his head, telling him to go.

"It'll be in Amy's backyard, at around.. 3PM to like, 9 or something today. Really it depends on her," Sonic shrugged his shoulders. "Think you can come?"

"Not like I have anything else to do, so sure,"

"Great! Uh.. see you then?" He flashed a thumbs up. "Oh! By the way, I think you'll like this person. I'll introduce you tonight," Sonic said, then sped away.

Silver's heart suddenly started beating faster, pounding loudly in his chest. His face started to get warmer and warmer. Was this… nervousness? Was he finally feeling something? After so long of just nothingness.. now he could feel. It was such a small feeling, simply insignificant to anyone else. But to him, he felt breathless. He couldn't comprehend why this certain event had triggered such a reaction.. but he wasn't going to take it for granted. He wanted to feel more.

He checked his wall clock, to see it was 2PM already! Silver sighed, for someone who was so fast, he had a knack for being late. Silver had to get ready quickly! He didn't want to miss this event that had sparked his first emotions in forever.

Silver ran to his bathroom, finally showering after weeks of avoiding it. He hadn't cared then, but now he had the motivation. The water running through his fur felt so refreshing, energizing him.

He dried up, then brushed his teeth, trying to freshen up his breath. He combed through his chest fur and tried to style the fur on his head. He wanted to look good for this mystery person Sonic had in mind. He wondered if a bow tie would be too much, but figured he wanted to go all out today. He sprayed a bit of cologne, adjusted his bow tie one last time, and then he was ready.

Silver glanced at himself in the mirror, seeing his amber eyes had managed to brighten up a lot. His fur was no longer all unkempt and matted, instead carefully brushed and smooth. He was glowing, inside and out.

Silver checked his clock, it being 2:45PM. Great, he still had 25 minutes! More than enough time for him. He felt so excited to go to this picnic. He didn't know what was different about today, but he loved it. He felt good. He hoped this feeling would last.

-----

Silver had flown all the way to Amy's house. It wasn't a great distance away, but it still had exhausted his powers. He landed abruptly, accidentally releasing his powers earlier than he wanted to in his anticipation. He was launched to the ground at a fast pace.

Silver braced himself for the hit onto the cement walkway, closing his eyes tight as tight as possible, only to be met with a gentle, warm hold. He opened his eyes to see a lilac colored cat, who had just saved him from that painful impact.

He gasped in sync with the cat. She was the exact color of the person that would pop up randomly in his head. He studied the depths of her eyes, her sharing the same honey yellow gaze he did. She placed him down carefully, staring back at him.

Silver felt that hole inside him that had tortured him for so long, slowly start to fill. He didn't even know her name, but just seeing her and feeling her presence had managed to make him explode with emotions. Her aura felt so familiar yet so foreign.

"..Hi," Silver greeted her shyly, one of his hands starting to scratch the back of his head nervously. "I'm Silver," he gulped, hoping she didn't think bad of him, especially after such an embarrassing fall.

"Hello.. I'm Blaze," she fidgeted with her fingers, her eyes lowering to stare at the ground. The air around them was so tense, yet bursting with feelings.

"Oh, hey, Silver and Blaze! See you two met each other before I could introduce you!" Sonic swooped in, saving them from their awkwardness, with his hands full of food supplies. "I'm kind of busy right now, but good to see you two together!" Then he left as fast as possible.

"Why don't we head to the backyard?" Silver asked, stepping out of his comfort zone. Blaze had awoken something inside him. He couldn't let her get away. She caused this inside him, and he couldn't let her go. He felt connected to her, like they were destined to be together.

"S..sure," Silver impulsively took her hand, holding her hand tight yet gentle in his grip. He didn't realize what he was doing, just wanting her close to him. Blaze was shocked, but she didn't stop him.

-----

They had grabbed a blanket from Amy and laid it down onto the grass. They each had a bottle of water. The smell of grilled burgers and hotdogs filled the air. Chit chat consumed the area. Silver didn't know how to start chit chat with Blaze, even as he watched all his friends just strike up conversations with random people.

"So.." Silver started, but trailed off as he didn't know what to say. He didn't know why he stayed with her. Why he brought her back here and sat with her. He was just drawn to her. And she seemed to be too.

"I'm gonna be honest.. I don't know what to say," he chuckled nervously. But then he saw Blaze giggle a little. His heart jerked, his face consumed by blush once again.

"I too… don't know what to say," she said, smiling softly. She looked so beautiful to him.. her silky lavender fur shining brightly, her wondrous eyes that held such emotion.. everything was breathtaking.

"You know.. we only just met.. but I feel like I want to tell you everything.." Silver said, sounding distant as if trapped in his thoughts. He was struggling to recall the memories he could've had with her. It couldn't be just a coincidence, considering the sudden change in his mental state because of her. That purple color consumed his mind, yet he could not pull up anything. They were so close, yet so far from him.

"Haha.. strangely, me too.." she trailed off, her voice almost trembling. Her voice was so gentle and soft, but Silver felt as if it held a hidden fierceness and power.

"Ok.. then here's a question. Where were you, emotionally, before this picnic?" Silver blurted out. "I..I mean, only if you want to answer,"

"No no, it's okay," she reassured. "Before this picnic… I felt empty.. like there was something missing.." Silver's eyes widened in surprise. "ha.. it feels weird, but also natural to share this with you.."

Silver paused. "That's exactly how I felt before this picnic too! But as soon as Sonic came around to tell me about it, it was like something came over me. I was so excited to go to this, after years of feeling dull,"

"Maybe we're meant to be," Blaze joked, though he could feel in her words that she meant it seriously. He spotted her delicate hand laying on the blanket. His own hand was just inching closer, preparing himself to just take the risk.

"Maybe.." Silver breathed out softly, gently but swiftly grabbing Blaze's hand. She turned her head to face him, a look of shock upon her face. But she relaxed a bit, and squeezed his hand. Silver gave her a small smile, a light pink brushing his cheeks.

"You know.. it feels like I know you. But I know that can't be possible.." Blaze started. "Like it feels like there's memories missing from my brain," Blaze told him, as she was subconsciously slowly inching closer to Silver's body.

"It's kind of spooky, haha. I keep feeling the same things you do," Silver laughed. "It's so strange, but it's not like I don't like it.. in fact.. I think I love it," he smirked mischievously. Blaze became increasingly red, and hid her face in her free hand.

The two of them had had unknowingly gotten incredibly close to one another. They had been talking for just a few minutes now, yet they felt so inseparable.

-----

The bright blue sky had started to fade into a vibrant orange and pink, the sun falling away as the moon slowly crept in as time passed. Him and Blaze had laid down together on the blanket, still holding each other's hand. Everyone was gathered together, chatting quietly, most watching the sky. The two of them were more far away, in their own little corner of the yard.

"The sky looks so beautiful.." Blaze watched in awe. The two of them hadn't gone out much, a sunset was pretty strange to them.

"..Like you.." Silver whispered, just barely loud enough for Blaze to hear. He glanced over at her, to see her cheeks growing redder. He smiled tenderly, feeling love fill his heart. He'd never felt love before, but it felt familiar. He loved the feeling of love.

Blaze turned to her side, grabbing onto Silver's arm, basically hugging it. She rubbed her head against his fur, cozying up to him. He turned his head to stare into her eyes, to see her eyes filled with love. It felt so intimate.

Silver turned over as well, so they were face to face. His face was gradually getting closer and closer to hers, as he used his free hand to crable her face fondly.

Blaze then closed the gap between them, lips collapsed together. Silver closed his eyes, deepening the kiss they shared.

Suddenly, everything made sense.

The memories rushed into his head, each one flashing as he remembered each and everyone of them.

This was Blaze. The Blaze he worked with to beat Iblis. The Blaze he knew so well. The Blaze that sacrificed herself for him. The Blaze that he loved.

"...It's you," he whispered once they had finally separated. Tears formed in his eyes, unable to comprehend his reality. "I… I thought I would never see you again.." he said as the tears fell.

"Oh Silver, you're so naive.. didn't I tell you we would meet again?" she chuckled as her own tears began to spill.

"I love you, Blaze.."

"I love you too, Silver."

honestly? im anti self dx but i kinda feel like it can be good? like if u do a lot of research and just know like “hey i probably have this disorder. i should try to get a proper diagnosis so i can get treatment for it.”

but dont just like. look up some disorder and see that one of the symptoms is sadness and just go “oh :’( i have this and you have to respect that uwu” cause my man i can assure you that you are not a fucking doctor.

Someone finally says it!!!

Can we stop this, it’s getting old

Y’all act like you didn’t make mistakes when you were 13-16 year olds

Can everyone just realize that while the writing may be faulty that they’re actually kind of realistic. Not everyone is mature enough to recognize the best decisions when you’re that young and we often make selfish decisions when other people enable us

Does that completely excuse bad behavior or justify hurting others? No. 

But at least we have an understanding of why people do the things that they do, which extends to our main characters.

I find it refreshing that Marinette isn’t perfect and as we keep progressing we see that neither are Kagami or Adrien. Marinette has a huge jealousy streak and it’s a major flaw that’s brought up so I can see how that’s tiring but speaking as a girl who was also the jealous type around Marinette’s age, it’s actually nice to see how a real teenager is depicted. Yes, acting on jealousy is incredibly selfish and we hurt other people unknowingly, but we shouldn’t completely label things as “good” or completely label things as “bad.” Marinette is a good character with a few bad characteristics and she tends to do a few bad things, but it’s better than having her be this squeaky clean character who is completely devoid of flaws and setbacks. It makes her more relatable and it makes it more empowering when she’s rewarded for the good things that she’s done.

I can see why everyone is kind of tired of seeing Marinette acting jealous/petty or why everyone is frustrated that Chloe isn’t getting a redemption arc, but you also have to realize that people don’t just change over night and that they actually have to actually dedicate time to recognize their mistakes and grow from them. People tend to relapse or fall back into bad behavior, not every redemption arc or growth arc is straight. 

Wouldn’t be weirder if Marinette completely accepted Kagami as Adrien’s love interest when she’s shown to be in love with him and has previously acted on impulsive jealousy? Wouldn’t it be a little weird if Chloe was super nice to everyone and did the right thing all the time when she’s always been a spoiled brat? Wouldn’t it be weird if our protagonists didn’t act like the characters they’ve always been established as? 

So please stop complaining about our characters not acting perfect, when you should just take it as it is and stop getting upset when they don’t reach your projected expectations

silvaze! love this ship! hope you like the art! <3

Hey, lesbians and wlw can still sexualize and fetishize mlm relationships. Just bc you like girls doesn’t excuse you from the gross behavior. Please stop.

miraculous fandom

HOLY SHIT you guys need to chill. sure, the new episode had plenty of second hand embarrassment and bad shit happen to marinette, BUT SHE'S A F I C T I O N A L CHARACTER. SHE'S NOT REAL. and so i've been seeing some fucking bullshit where y'all have been hating on astruc. unless he did some horrendous shit i don't know about, THIS IS FUCKING UNCALLED FOR. here's an examples:

this was on a gif of ladybug stepping on his face. why the fuck are people so fucking angry they're being assholes to the show's creator? i honestly hope they cancel the fucking show so y'all shut the fuck up. sure, marinette didn't deserve that, but neither does astruc. you guys are fucking toxic. i hate fans like y'all. it's just a show and a fictional character. can't believe you're putting a character before a real person. sure it's not the worst shit i've seen, but there has been some shitty stuff said towards astruc, and i don't think he deserves it. if he did something i didn't know that was terrible that makes this called for, tell me. but i don't think there was anything he did. honestly disappointed.

Why So Much Salt?!

So this might actually be a controversial post since so many people in the Miraculous Ladybug fandom love salt and hating on the creators, but I think the fandom has crossed the line.

It seems like every episode I see so many post hating on the writing and characters and ultimately there is always a post coming at Thomas Astruc himself. Mind you, a lot of these post are brutal and show literal hate to the author of the show for little details here and there that people don’t really like, no matter how opinion based these issues are.

I don’t understand how all these basic manners the fandom excels at when it comes to fan writings and fan art are all thrown out the window when someone manages to have their original ideas actually publicized. When it comes to fan written work, if people don’t like it, they just ignore it and don’t write hateful things in the comment section. If they enjoy most of it, but have a few places here and there they don’t care for, they still usually like the work and make nice comments. However, when it comes to Thomas, or any other publized creator for that matter, because I feel like this does not just happen with MLB, people feel free to spew their hate on the smallest little details instead of just commenting on what they like or enjoyed about the episode. Thomas gets direct hate thrown at him for people’s opinion on little details all the time.

Look, at the end of the day, this is Thomas’ show, and these are his characters. This is his original story, his original world, and his original project. He got the funding to make his original idea come to life and people of all ages all over around the globe have loved it! Even if you think your fan fictions, one-shots, or AUs are better than the actual show, they would not exist without Thomas and his original idea. Even if you think you can write the characters better, they are his characters, and not yours. We can have fun using the characters and the universe he created, and we can add some of our own originality by coming up with AUs or adding changes to characters, but at the end of the day, the original story is his, and he can do what he wants with it. We as a fandom should respect him like we would fellow tumblr writers in the sense that even if we do not like his work, we just ignore it, and move on, because it’s not our baby, it’s his. If you do not like the actual show, feel free to stop watching it and only consume fan fiction based off of his idea. That way, people who enjoy the show do not have to deal with seeing hateful comments after every episode from people who should have stopped watching long ago if they really feel the way they say.

i was trying to fight a scamp in castle kvatch but i tripped over something that turned out to be martin. then i tried firing flames at the scamp, but martin chose that moment to regain consciousness, took a fireball to the face, and collapsed again. the battle for kvatch was fun

The Theme of Final Space  SPOILERS AHEAD

Before you read any further make sure you watch all episodes of Final Space since I will be talking about the whole first season.

I was watching the documentary that was released today where Olan goes into the theme of loneliness in the show and I started to realize how all of the characters are brought together by loneliness.

Gary is obvious. His father died when he was young and he was basically exiled in space for five years with a bunch of robots. He has a desperation to get out of that state by befriending anyone he comes across no matter their past. In the end, however, he is essentially back to where he started since the majority of his friends are either dead or MIA and his only comfort before death is talking with his AI friend HUE, someone he didn’t consider company when a prisoner.

Quinn is lonely in that she, at the time, was the only one in the Infinity Guard to defy The Lord Commander. She was betrayed by the very organization she based her whole life around and has a hard time trusting anyone else in the event she might be hurt again.

Avocato is lonely because he feels that no one would ever empathize with him. He’s hesitant about being close to anyone because he knows once people know about his history and how he was The Lord Commander’s second in command, they would never give him the time of day so he shuts down any friendly gestures at first. Avocato even anticipates his son will never forgive him for the things he’s done. He’s lonely in that he anticipates everyone will hate him.

Little Cato is another obvious one. Hell, he even says it in episode 7. He’s lonely because he never really had a family. Even when Avocato was alive, he was mostly separated from him and it is implied that Avocato was cold outwardly towards him when working for The Lord Commander. He had one moment of feeling whole again with his father and then it was suddenly ripped from his arms when Avocato sacrificed himself. His guilt for his father’s death makes him feel even more alone and would surely eat him if it weren’t for Gary.

Mooncake is lonely because as Nightfall and Lord Commander put it, “everywhere he goes, death follows.” No matter who he befriends with, it will always end in tragedy. In the end when everyone is dead due to people trying to protect him or when he himself uses his powers, he will be back to square one and wander in the loneliness of space.

KVN is actually a pretty relatable form of loneliness in that no one believes in him. Gary constantly makes it a point that he absolutely loathes KVN to the point it physically pains him to give him a thumbs up when he does something good. HUE even acknowledges that no one has any faith in KVN when he is in the process of saving the Galaxy One from the Infinity Guard. I feel that KVN is well aware that no one really believes in him but puts on a smile (even though he doesn’t have a mouth) to hide his insecurities. All he wants is approval and friends, but due to his annoying nature, it’s hard for people to actually take him seriously. 

HUE is pretty simple in that him being a stereotypical “unfeeling AI”, he feels that he is destined to be lonely and friendless. However, over time, he develops a very close bond towards Gary and is probably the closest friend Gary has since they both had to live with each other for five years. He overcomes the loneliness of his programming by discovering a bit of humanity inside of him via his care for Gary. When Gary dies he actually feels loss and thus alone inside the helmet of his deceased friend. It’s basically how Cortana felt between Halo 3 and Halo 4 after John freezes himself for 4 years in space and she has no company but the frozen body of her closest friend. 

The Lord Commander even has some loneliness inside of him and I feel that this is going to play a huge part in season 2. The Lord Commander, or Jack, is lonely due to the fact that he was always in the shadow of someone else and felt unimportant. He was the co-pilot of the great John Goodspeed but history only remembers John and not Jack on that fateful flight. His rise to power is a desperation for him to be remembered, but in doing so, he is regarded as one of the vilest beings in the universe. His value for loyalty is another desperation to get out of a lonely state since he wants everyone to pay attention to him and not anyone else. His insecurities really take form in the last episode when he insists that he got his powers because he was chosen and therefore important and therefore noticed. However, Gary lays the hard truth on him and tells him that his powers were a mistake and he is still a nobody which in turn infuriates Jack. In the end, the Titans choose Earth and leave Jack to suffer alone with his illness with no one to care for him. 

I’m super excited where Season 2 is going to go but I hope the theme of loneliness continues throughout the show because I think its a very multi-layered and important theme to explore in fiction. :)