Like-luke-likes - Like-Luke-Likes

I am so confused by this car owner’s choice of tail light mods via Shitty_Car_Mods

imagine if sirius got married and had a kid and they were arguing and the kid was like ‘are you serious?’ and he’d be so torn. what dad joke does he make?? ‘why yes i am sirius’ or ‘no im not serious, im dad’? which one? which one would he make??? i dont know

god I’m absolutely going to hell I’m sorry guys 

I was at my friend’s engagement party yesterday and everyone was about to do cheers with these nasty ass shots of blue tequila but I don’t drink and I especially do not drink tequila, blue or otherwise, so I grabbed a piece of bread from the basket on the table and just tapped it against people’s glasses like it was a legitimate beverage instead of a wheat byproduct 

and one of my friends was like ‘ho what in god’s name are you doing’ 

and I didn’t know how to say I would rather slice of my own foot than drink tequila so I just held my bread up and said ‘I’m toasting’ 

and in that moment I felt my soul descend directly into the eighteenth circle of hell

The difference between a Chad and an incel is just a varying degree of scoliosis.

This strip is so stressful

me: how am i? really? as if u care lmao. im so SICK of small talk,. i want someone who asks about my day and MEANS it, wipes my tears and tells me im beautiful without make up on, but all boys do is lie.maybe love wasn’t made for people like me

walmart employee: ma'am,

Demo Reel Aug 2018

This is "Demo Reel Aug 2018" by Lauren Adassovsky on Vimeo, the home for high quality videos and the people who love them.

Here’s my latest demo reel, complete with some of the work I did on Age of Sail. Currently available for freelance work!

The Red dress goes well with Red's attitude.

"What were you wearing?"

I wore a red dress to work today. It has a zipper at either side of my chest that can unzip and reveal a thin strip of skin. A coworker, without warning, tried pulling at the zipper and when it wouldn’t zip, instead revealed a good portion of my collarbone and shoulder as well as my bra strap. An hour later, the same coworker came up and told me to not wear clothes with zippers because he’ll go right ahead and unzip them. I shot back that unzipping me without my permission is sexual harassment. Apparently a manager heard and berated my coworker. At the end of my shift, my coworker told me that my little comment got him in trouble and that he no longer feels comfortable saying anything to me other than “hello” and “goodbye.”

I am supposed to feel guilty for pointing out that he can’t lay his fucking hands on me.

Only reason I can’t perform my music live is chronic, deafening farts