Papyrus Using Twitter

my top 10 favorite (funniest) emojis (on an android/Samsung phone)

10. 😀

lowkey looks traumatized. homie just got told something awful and is still in shock.

9. 😦

previous entry a few moments later

8. 😔

very pitiable shame. like a dog that ripped up the couch. perfect for when someone is mad at me

7. 🤔

hermmmm. usually follows a conspiracy theory

6. 🙂

head empty. or, possibly, full of quiet evil

5. 😏

heh, nothin' personal kid

4. 🤨

3. 🤥

says so much with so little

a liar. but he seems very disappointed in himself

2. 🥸

great for texting incognito. "that message couldn't have come from me, that guy looks nothing like me!"

honorable mention: 😗

was gonna kiss you, but then you said that and now I'm not sure

1. 😱

nothing I will ever text anyone is worthy of the sincere horror seen here. "what if they're out of carrots 😱" unparalleled drama. best read with a loud gasp.

yo check this out. Alexa, cure cancer

Alexa-

was walking in the woods, saw this chip bag stuck to the rocks in the river (creek?). so I subjected myself to the worst sensory experience known to man and took off my shoes to wade over slimy ass river (creek?) rocks to fish it out. almost slipped like 8 times, but we did it. consider the environment saved guys

me when- me w- when I-

me: I gotta get up early so it's super important I get good sleep tonight

brain: i-important?? that's scary! too much pressure! noooo we should stay up watching youtube with steadily growing anxiety instead!

i wish there was a way to have an autopsy that didnt kill u. i think it would be so cathartic

can't sleep. too many thoughts abt all my many plans. what to wear tomorrow. shoes maybe? ugh

me, after setting an arbitrary time limit for a wip: what nonsense is this?! how could I ever finish in this time frame?! might as well give up and do it never! never I say!

was recently told I giggle in my sleep. lowkey pisses me off cause the only dreams I ever remember having are nightmares so idk what the fuck asleep-me has to be laughing about