An Alien Desires To 'court' Another Alien, Of The Race Called Humans. The Human Is Desirable In Every

150 word challenge! Eddie has to watch Hermes and Tom while the dads are out! We need more Eddie interactions lol

150 words exactly!! I'm proud of this one! It's a lot harder than I thought to finish a whole idea/scene in so few words. But it was a good sort of challenging!

"Grandpa Eddie! Grandpa Eddie!"

"Yes, Hermes?" the man questioned, snagging the child off the ground to stop the constant running. Hermes giggled as Eddie pulled them further and further into the air.

"Tom wants a snack! He's hungry," Hermes claimed.

"Oh, Tom wants a snack? Not you?"

"Me too! Me too, Grandpa Eddie!"

"Well, we should go ask your brother what he wants for his snack, shouldn't we?"

Hermes barely hesitated before agreeing. "Yeah, Tom can choose the snack!"

The child in Eddie's arms began wriggling around to escape the hold. The grandfather released Hermes, only to watch them speed off in the direction of their brother.

"Hey Tom-tom, what snack do you want?"

"Snack? Can have juice? And carrots?"

"Of course you can have juice and carrots, Tom," Eddie agreed easily, ruffling the small child's hair gently, eliciting a grin from the boy. "Do you want the same, Hermes?"

"Yes, please!"

📓 what do you think Rex bitches about constantly?

😂😂 I’m sorry I made myself laugh while writing this so this is what I think he would bitch about + a side plot that I honestly thought was pretty funny

Anakin when he’s being a dumbass

Fives when he makes crude jokes on the battlefield

Echo when he enables Fives’ jokes

Fives and Echo’s prank wars (though most of it’s for show)

Keeli and Howzer (if only so he can remember his batchmates; he also bitches to them about everything so it’s a 50/50 on if they’ll get gossip or insulted)

Anakin when he comes up with a reckless plan that somehow works

Ahsoka when she hit him in the face with her lightsabers

Obi-Wan if only because Cody constantly bitches about him not sleeping

Jesse and Hardcase (there is no need for an explanation here)

Kix when he tries to use his CMO voice to keep him in the medbay for longer than needed

Ahsoka when she does something reckless on the battlefield that could have gotten her killed

Boil and Waxer for teaching Fives more jokes

Anakin when he basically implied to Hunter they were in a relationship because of his horrible communication skills

Wolffe because he bit him when he was a cadet and he still isn’t over it

Fox because honestly, it’s just kind of funny watching Fox’s eyebrow tick up

Bly because of his stupid crush on Aayla

Kix for sneaking a sedative in his food on three separate occasions

Cody because he put itching powder in his blacks on a day when they were sent out into the field

Jesse because he caught the whole thing on video

Ponds for almost dying

Anakin when he uses the Force to throw him in the air

Bly again because he pines over Aayla but won’t do shit about it

Wolffe because Ahsoka told him once that she thinks he’s cool because he works with Plo

Ponds for bringing Boba back with him and now they have the feisty Fett son who bites just like Wolffe

Boba for hijacking his datapad

Fox because he didn’t kill the Chancellor earlier

Anakin because he tried to help Palpatine

Fox because he didn’t tell them about Palpatine and so now Rex has to make up all the hugs and time they almost lost

Anakin because the only reason he didn’t follow Palpatine was because he got into an argument with Fox

Fox because he got into an argument with a Jedi who was almost about to fall

Quinlan

Crosshair for flicking his toothpick in his face

Fives for making another stupid joke when they finally found Echo

Echo for laughing at the joke

Anakin for not telling anyone else that he was married

Anakin for being Rex’s friend and making him lie to save his ass

The Jedi Council because they apparently knew about his marriage and was wanting for him to come clean

Anakin because he’s still denying it

Mace who asked the question on who he was seeing

Anakin for saying It’s him 😤 (on god, he could have warned Rex)

The Jedi Council for now staring at him and waiting for him to crack

Himself because he’s a shit liar

Himself again because he can’t help but dig a deeper hole and agree with Anakin’s statement

Anakin for being shocked that he’s covering his ass still (if you want to make this believable, just go with it!)

Hunter for the credits he sees exchanged with Fives

Fives for betting on him (on choosing the wrong bet)

Cody, Wolffe, Fox, Bly, Ponds and Gree for all snickering

Gree who made a loud comment about Rex being into recklessness

Anakin who snickered at that

Anakin for shrugging at his glare and saying he could see it

Obi-wan for congratulating their (fake!) relationship

Mace for coming up with the idea that if a Anakin married Rex, they could gain clone citizenship for all clones due to marriage within the Jedi Council (if the Senate won’t pass a bill soon)

Anakin who’s now backing out saying he can’t (which Rex knows he can’t; he’s married)

Plo for asking why Anakin can’t instead of dropping it

Anakin for,instead of saying something reasonable, states that they already got married

Echo for exchanging credits with Tech and not withering under his glare

Yoda for asking him if this is true

Everyone in the goddamn room staring at him

Anakin because he’s a shit best friend and he honestly should have never become friends with his General, especially one who has a secret marriage (even if Rex was never told explicitly but he’s not a dumbass; he’s pretty sure Anakin and Padme are married)

Himself because now he’s doubting whether Anakin actually is married and if he’s not, Rex is gonna look like a real dumbass

Anakin because he’s doing the eye nod thing again and Rex doesn’t know what up side up down means!!

Himself for indulging in the silent motions and now they’re having a silent conversation while everyone’s staring

Fox for interrupting their conversation before they could come to a decision

Anakin because why did he have to be Rex’s best friend? (He should have let Anakin fall; he wouldn’t be in this position if Anakin was a Sith)

Himself for thinking that because knowing Anakin, he probably would be in the same position regardless if Anakin was still a Jedi or a Sith

Himself for saying yes to Yoda’s question

Cody for exchanging credits with Ponds

Yea that’s about it; it’s mainly Anakin that Rex bitches constantly about

Twitter User: I wish I had more followers, then I’d be more likely to get verified.

Facebook User: I wish my posts reached further, then I’d get famous.

Instagram User: I wish I had more followers so I can unlock more basic features for my account.

TikTok User: I wish I had more views then I’d be a real influencer.

Tumbler User: I specifically didn’t tag this so no one would find it why does it have 200k notes? Who the hell are these people following me? All of you need to go away so I can go back to posting incomprehensible garbage and pictures of frogs.

Crews Quick Guide to Humans

Quiet humans are not defective. Loud humans are not defective. Unless there is a significant change, assume your human is operating at normal levels.

Human words do not mean the same thing all the time. Look up the study of human tone if you want to always know what your human means.

Human females will smell of blood each month. If this changes, ask your human in private if something happened.

Human males often do not know how loud they are. Asking them to lower their voice is not offensive.

Human cultures vary greatly and various cultures have conflicting beliefs. Most humans will not be offended if you cannot keep up with this.

Humans do not share a hive mind but do have several musical triggers that activate a human chorus. These triggers transcend most cultural and language barriers.

All Stabby units come with a human locator setting. Use liberally.

Ask for a detailed explanation before agreeing to join a human on any non work activity.

Be aware of human hobbies and skills. Humans enjoy company and will likely teach you whatever they know. It is also beneficial to know what your human may do should they get bored.

Do not be too concerned over what humans ingest, so long as they do so willingly and with the full knowledge of what they are ingesting.

Unless you hear a human say something along the lines of ‘I hope this works’ or ‘here goes nothing’, assume they have a working knowledge at the attempted task.

If you hear a human say one of the above phrases, take cover as it is likely too late to stop or report them.

because i love y’all, i’m sharing my family’s recipe for apple tea (traditional fall/winter drink in west asia, turkey, and many areas of the balkans)

it’s like a more delicate version of apple cider and i basically live off of this stuff when the weather starts to cool!

Apple Tea (for two)

1 large apple or 2 small, shredded (you can use a cheese grater)

3 cups water

1-2 cinnamon sticks

2-3 pc clove (optional)

honey to taste

1 tsp of lemon juice (add at end)

green tea (optional! some versions call for green tea but i actually prefer it without. up to you!)

throw it all in a pot and let it simmer on a low temperature for an hour or so. while it’s simmering, it will also make your home smell delicious! (if you make it with green tea, add the tea at the end, about five minutes before taking it off the heat so the flavor doesn’t become bitter from oversteeping). strain into your cups and enjoy hot.

end result:

cliché but classic trope: when the person who almost died wakes up in a hospital bed, looks around and sees the object of their affection sleeping uncomfortably in the chair next to them because they haven’t moved in days.

Since we haven’t started the @jedijune​ prompts yet, I thought I’d just do a bit of a teaser for what I have planned. 

A lot of my Jedi content this month will focus on their relationship with younglings, and there’s not better way to start things off than to remind you all that Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi actually spoils kids a lot and always have.

There’s just so much softness and love and fondness here, and it’s beautiful. 

+ Bonus: Yes, he spoiled Anakin too, just a bit <3

These two OCs I made years ago just fit the palette so well I had to do them. Orange it Volpe and green is Finn. They are based in the world of RWBY and I love them so much.

For some reason, I wonder what aliens think of sky diving, I like to think like this (H is human) (A is alien)

A: human... I did some research, and I have a question

H: Sure, ask away

A: What is "sky diving"

H: Oh, it's a sport where we get in a plane, fly very high... And jump

A:YOU WHAT!?!

H: We jump, but don't worry, we can land safely

A: oh thank god... So, you use some kind of gravitation device? Or use some technological device to land slowly?

H: Uhhh, not exactly....

A: .... Human... What exactly do you use....

H: ...

A: Human, what... Exactly... Do you use?

H: a backpack with a bunch of fabric... Sometimes silk....

A: ...

H: ...

A: YOU USE CLOTHING, TO STOP YOUR FALL, AFTER JUMPING OFF SEVERAL THOUSAND FEET UP!?

H: Yeah, but it's a different kind of fabric you know...

A: ... Okay, but what do you do if the fabric breaks, or if it gets tangled

H: ... Enjoy the view?

A: ... I still don't know why you aren't extinct